Hello there!

I'm sorry it has been so long. I hope I'll catch up with the updates and start posting more frequently again.

Thank you all for your comments and support it makes me want to write more and more, and especially to Lyssa813 who is now my beta-reader. Thank you lots!

I hope you like the chapter even though it doesn't have any major life changes. I'm already waiting for your opinions. ;P

Two months had passed by in a blur, despite how much it still felt like just yesterday when the three of them had gone to pick up Graham and Sarah. Adding, during that time, a ton of new experiences and challenges she would never regret. She knew Rafael was in the same boat as her, despite how overwhelming, tiresome or distressing it could be. She also knew she would never regret taking that step with Rafael because he was thriving as a father.

The first month they had been parenting by themselves, not wanting to overwhelm the kids. Giving them all time to settle with the changes taking place and letting their personalities show up for earnest.

And it hadn't been until the second month as a new family of five when it happened for the first time. It had been fun and sometimes emotional when their family got to see Rafael's fatherly mood in earnest. They had seen glimpses before, but Rafael's fear of being teased even if it was with easygoing nature hadn't let them see fully his daddy antics before.

It had surprised her how insecure and unsure he was of this side of him, but no amount of words on her part had changed his behavior. He didn't neglect the kids when they were with their family, but she could see how restricted his behavior was. But it seemed something, she didn't know yet, had changed. And it was like he had thrown his fears out the window because he wasn't scared anymore to let the world see this side of him.

She had seen these moments before. Those fatherly moments between father and son. Since that first night, she brought Noah home, and Rafael still thought he was holding a bomb in his arms, she knew she had been lucky enough to see that undiscovered and marvelous side of Rafael. She loved those images of him, and with time she had managed to control her arousal. But she had to admit that the change had brought new obstacles to her, and her libido.

It was easy to remember the people whose reaction had meant more, because of the feelings involved or because how surreal they had been.

…

Lucia Barba.

She was bound to be the first one.

She had already been a fearsome grandmother of one, and now there were three kids for her to spoil rotten. She was in heaven.

They were supposed to have a date night. It was nothing major, just a few hours away to share with each other, while Lucia enjoyed her beloved time with her grandkids.

It hadn't been strange for her to have arrived at their place earlier than they had planned, finding Olivia and Sarah having a little girl time while the boys were having their mischief.

"Where are the boys?" Lucia asked, with a happy Sarah on her lap. It had only taken her a few minutes to have her in her arms, enjoying the age of Sarah. It was a thing she hadn't had the opportunity before, as Noah had been older when she had first gotten the title of grandmother.

Olivia smiled at her question. She knew where they were, as she had found them while she went to Sarah's room to pick her up after her nap. She had managed to snatch a photo before they caught her staring at them with a loving smile and tearful eyes, as she stared at the blush rising on Rafael's skin. But before she could say anything, the laughs coming from the hallway stole Lucia's attention.

"Better if you go see for yourself," Olivia said enigmatically, making Lucia's curiosity grow.

"Ok." The elder woman said before she left Sarah with her mother and followed the voices.

It might have been a cliche thing, but sure it had put a smile on her face. Rafael had only wanted to groom a bit of the stubble he was wearing during his paternity leave before they went to their date, but the inquisitive minds of their boys had managed to change his plans. And that had been how she had found them. Rafael with shaving cream on his face and his forgotten razor in his hand, and the boys with soapy bubbles on their checks and something she hadn't identified in their hands, while they learned how to shave and be little men.

It had been amazing.

"I know," Olivia said when she saw Lucia coming back with the same tearful eyes and shy smile she knew she had shown Rafael when she had seen them.

"He's..." Lucia didn't know what to say as she sat again on the couch.

"Amazing." Olivia offered. "You already have the photo I stole on your phone." Olivia knew she would want it.

"He's thriving."

"Yeah, he still doesn't believe it sometimes," Olivia said.

"Soon," Lucia said grasping her hand. "Sometimes he can be a little slow." She said making both women laugh.

…

Amanda.

It wasn't surprising she was the second to say it.

That morning a short conversation between her and Amanda had transformed into an easygoing afternoon at the park, and now the two of them were quietly watching Rafael and Sonny run with Noah, Graham, and Jesse while they sat under a tree's shade with Sarah.

"I saw him many times with Noah, but this..." Amanda said, neither of them leaving their sight of their husbands and kids.

"I know," Olivia said with a smile on her face.

"He's like... I don't know... thriving?" Amanda said. "I mean... I saw him do the same when it was just Noah, but he's... different now... I guess."

"Yeah..." Olivia had noticed too. Once his fears had settled down a bit, he had always been the first one in line to play with Noah, not caring if he was bound to get dirty or go home with the whole sandbox in his shoes, but the three kids together had allowed something new arise.

"Did you know he asked Sonny tips on how to manage that many kids?" Amanda asked her. The whole squad knew about his nieces and nephews, but she wouldn't have imagined Rafael would go to him for advice. Because as much as their friendship had evolved from the days when Sonny drove him crazy with his questions and suggestions, he still went to Rita when he needed someone to vent to.

"No way!" Olivia said surprised seeing how Amanda nodded in amusement at her reaction.

"I only know because of I overheard their conversation at the precinct. He was fidgeting, poor Sonny, as he tried to deny it when I asked, trying to keep it under my radar." Olivia laughed at Amanda's words, trying to keep her blush at minimal. Leave it to her husband to find a way to make her blush when he wasn't beside her. "I know," Amanda said, making Olivia look at her. Apparently, she hadn't been as subtle as she had thought. "Sonny does the same to me."

Neither of them needed much more words between them. There was a thing seeing your man acting like a father that you couldn't explain or make other people understand unless they were in the same boat as you.

…

Rita.

Despite how much she had come to like and care for Rafael's university friend, sometimes she didn't know how her mind worked. And more often than not was caught with not quite knowing what to say.

And that was what was happening now.

Through Noah's daycare, they had known about the event hosted today at the park. A day of sports for little kids until eight years old. And Noah had wanted to invite everyone. Hence the presence of the whole squad and their kids.

And now she somehow found herself alone with Rita, completely unaware of how that happened. They had been working less and less together, mostly due to her relationship with Fin, and from being tired of defending people she knew were guilty. And now the few times they shared work it was from the same side of the case, letting her see another side of Rita and allowing her to forge a good friendship.

"They are quite a sight," Rita said. Olivia expected to see a smirk on the other woman's face, but she found a gentle smile instead. Following her sight, she saw her husband.

Sarah was in his arms, and Graham was clasping his pants while they cheered on Noah who was in the sack race, catching her attention so much that she didn't think to answer Rita's observation. While she kept looking at them, Olivia noticed how Graham caught Rafael's attention to be picked up, and how he easily managed to pick him up, despite having Sarah perched on his other hip.

"I had started to lose hope. I thought I would never see him like this." Rita's words were enough this time to properly catch Olivia's attention, showing her curiosity to the other woman. "It wasn't until we had been friends for a few months...I think we were in our second year the first time I caught him... I saw him sometimes looking at families. He had that expression on his face, like a little kid looking at something he's being denied. I never asked him about it. I already knew the little bits about his father and his past relationship with Yelina to know my questions wouldn't be appreciated." Rita's sight didn't leave the boys while she talked. "So, thank you."

"For?" Olivia murmured, a little afraid to ask.

"For giving my friend what he has been denying himself for years," Rita said making Olivia blush.

"You are welcomed," Olivia said not knowing what to say. Rita had caught her out of nowhere, as always.

"I knew he would be that kind of dad. The one that thrives seeing how his kids grow, the one that doesn't mind to get dirtier than them if he gets smiles and laughs in reward."

"I knew it too."

Neither of them said anything more for a few minutes, both of them enjoying the silence between them. Until Rafael came back with the kids, and the easy banter between the adults started again.

…

Fin.

It's the same day, just a few hours later. She finds herself looking at Rafael and the kids from afar again. They are still in the park, enjoying the sports day when Fin approaches her.

He is the big brother she never had, a constant she has had since they started working together.

"Do you want me to bring you a bucket to pick your drool baby girl?" He asked making her laugh and blush.

"No thank you." She tried to shush him.

"You sure?" He asked again.

"Yes," Olivia said with loving exasperation, making Fin laugh.

"You look happy." He said as he settled beside her.

"I am."

"Good." He murmured. "I was pretty close to beating some sense into him a few months back." He confessed making Olivia look at him with surprise. "Don't look at me like this." He said. "I know something happened, I didn't ask, but I knew there was something off with both of you." Olivia knew there was no point in trying to deny it and the soft sigh gave Fin the answer he needed.

"I don't know if I want to thank you or to strangle you." She said making him chuckle despite the serious tone of their conversation.

"I'll always have your back." Fin said. "You are my sister."

"Fin," Olivia murmured as she went to hug him. Between Rita and him she was on the verge of tears for the second time today.

"And I'll have yours," Olivia said.

"Good." Fin said. "I'm still needed?" Fin asked.

"Not anymore, we talked," Olivia said remembering the multiple talks they had had since they decided on increasing their family. "And we both got our heads out of our asses."

"Ok." Fin said as he kept his arm on Olivia's back, maintaining the contact between the two of them. "He's good at it." He said.

"Did you have any doubt?" Olivia asked trying not to sound petty or a boor.

"No, no." Fin quickly assured her. "Just surprised, I didn't think he would be so at ease. The first times i saw him interacting with a kid..." Fin didn't end the thought to have Olivia remember those first times with Noah, and how awkwardly cute he was.

"He has come around."

"You could say so." Fin said making them both chuckle. "Now don't let me waste your time. Go be with them." Fin said as he gently pushed her towards her family. "You've done enough stalking for today."

She didn't have time to answer Fin's words because, as quickly as he said them he was leaving her alone. But he was right. She was done stalking today.

…

Chief Dodds.

Despite how difficult it could be to roam the city with three kids under four they had decided to have lunch outside after spending the morning walking through the city.

The place Rafael chose hadn't been anything special, just a family friendly Italian place with a marvelous kids menu.

And now with the bellies full, the kids had asked for a quick trip to the closest park.

"Lieutenant?" A voice she knew perfectly caught her attention.

"Chief." She hadn't seen Dodds since she had started her leave. "How are you?" She asked surprised to find the man on this side of the city.

"Fine, just visiting some friends." He said.

"Good."

"Liv?" Rafael's voice came from behind as he had been slowed by Noah who had caught something interesting in a nearby show window.

"Counselor?" Dodds asked when he saw Rafael. He was in full daddy way. His hair had no product, his stubble was a bit scruffy, and he had decided to wear jeans and a soft green jumper this morning. But the best part was that apart from having Noah's hand clasped in his, he had Sarah flushed against his chest in the baby carrier.

"Chief Dodds," Rafael said not seeing how unsettled Dodds was at his appearance, being too concentrated on his argument with Noah about having a second ice-cream in the same day.

"Yeah..." Dodds murmured. "Well, I better keep going, or I'm going to be late." He said as he started to move again, with his face still bearing how surprised he was.

"Ok. It was nice seeing you." Olivia said as the other man bid his farewell.

"He seemed a bit spooked," Rafael commented as he gently guided Olivia with a hand on her back towards the park while Graham was grabbing her hand.

"I think you broke him a bit." She said smirking.

"Me?" Rafael asked surprised. "I barely spoke to the man." He said as they made their way towards the park.

"You didn't need any words. Your papa mode was enough." Olivia said making Rafael blush a little. "But don't worry, I don't think your reputation will be ruined, my love." Olivia loved to mess with him.

"Haha, you are so funny," Rafael said. "Just be careful with your words or the next time I sneak a cookie or ice-cream I won't share." He said seriously. "Come on boys, let's race to the swings," Rafael said to the kids, and before he left with them he looked at Olivia for a second winking at her teasingly, not seeing her amusement at his childish words.

…

It wasn't unusual to be woken up by one of the kids in the middle of the night, but the strange part of this night was that she had woken up alone in bed without any noise to be the cause of it.

Without thinking she woke up and went to check on the kids. The boys were sleeping, and Sarah's crib was empty as she had expected after seeing a light coming from the living room.

From the threshold, she saw Rafael. He wasn't doing anything she hadn't seen before. But God, these days she didn't need much more to be floating in clouds of happiness. If his stubble, his messy bedhead hair, the wrinkled white t-shirt paired with some boxers wasn't enough, his voice while he murmured a Spanish lullaby trying to calm their daughter sure was the cherry on top.

She didn't care that the living room was a mess, or how the boys could go from being as thick as thieves to barely having time to catch them before they started to throw at each other the closest toy they had when a misunderstanding between them happened. Always happening when only one parent was available, and at the same moment the boys went feral, Sarah decided she wanted their attention. Or how terrified they still were that something was going to go wrong, that they had put too much on the same plate.

They had stumbled through a few rough patches, but it had been nothing that patience and love couldn't solve. Nothing that an honest and open conversation between the adults, once the sun was down, that was able to ease the concerns and the overwhelming feelings she or Rafael could have.

But seeing moments like this one, it made it all worth it. Seeing or hearing the kids smile and laugh, seeing them grow, learn and evolve. So pure, that for the first time since she had started at the force, the fleeting thought of retirement wasn't making run to the hills. It was the first time that the thought of finding another way to help while getting to spent more time with her family brought a warm feeling in her belly.

"Something on your mind." Rafael's voice startled her making him laugh softly, careful of the sleeping baby in his arms.

"Something." She murmured as she stepped beside him, resting her head on his shoulder, and her hand on his waist.

"Want to share?" He offered as he kissed her on her hair.

"One of these days you have to stop doing this," Olivia said smirking.

"This? What's this supposed to mean?"

"Making my legs go all jelly when I see you with the kids." She said making him chuckle.

"Only if you stop too." He said. "Because we are in the same boat cariño (honey)."

"What?" She asked surprised, looking at him in the eyes.

"What? You hadn't noticed?" Rafael said. "I've got all of these alpha growls I have to keep down." It was her turn to chuckle.

"You are good at this." Olivia murmured kissing Rafael's cheek and caressing his hair.

"I try."

"And you are succeeding," Olivia said while Rafael only mumbled as an agreement. "Don't try to tell me otherwise."

"Ok." He said smiling, letting her see he was one step closer to believe her.

"Good," Olivia said pleased, as she rested her head on his shoulder again.

"This is good." She murmured.

"Yes." He said while they both kept looking at the sleeping girl. They should probably put her on her crib, but five more minutes of cuddles didn't hurt anyone. He could start rambling on how good it was, but Rafael knew he would never find the right words to describe the mix of feelings his heart felt.