Chapter Thirty-Four: Of Mice and Men
"S—Sirius . . . R—Remus. . . ." Gods, he even sounded like a rat in addition to looking like one. Hell, his entire shifty, nervous behavior was rat-like. "My friends, my old friends. . ." His eyes darted from the boarded windows to the door which Snape had moved to block, his wand drawn and a look of disgust on his pallid, shocked face.
Sirius made to raise Alexis's wand but Remus quelled him with a look. Cassie's wand, however, was fixed on Pettigrew. The former rat kept glancing at the exits, becoming visibly more nervous by the second. "We've been having a little chat Peter, about the night Lily and James died," Remus said lightly, though his eyes had become quite hard. "You may have missed some of the finer points when you were squeaking pathetically there on the bed," Cassie said so viciously that Pettigrew actually recoiled.
Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned. "Remus," Pettigrew gasped, sweat breaking out on his pasty face. "You don't believe him do you? H—he tried to kill me, Remus. . ." "So we've heard." Remus said coldly. "We'd like to clear up one or two little matters with you, Peter, if you'd be so--" "He's come to and try and kill me again!" Pettigrew squealed desperately, pointing at Sirius with his middle finger because his index finger had been rather clumsily severed at the base.
"He killed Lily and James and now he's come to kill me too! I knew Azkaban couldn't hold him; I've been waiting twelve years! Pettigrew gasped. Alexis took his place beside Cassie. The place he belonged. "You must be the world's greatest Seer then because no one has ever broken out of Azkaban before," Alexis said darkly. "He's got dark powers you can't even imagine! You-Know-Who taught him a few tricks!" Pettigrew squeaked.
Sirius laughed; a horrible mirthless sound. "Voldemort teach me tricks?" he sneered and Pettigrew actually took a step back. "What, scared to hear your old master's name?" Cassie mocked. "I don't blame you, Peter. His lot isn't very happy with you, are they? On no, I heard them scream all sorts of things in their sleep. It seems the double-crosser double-crossed them," Sirius said darkly. "Ahh, I see, so Voldemort went to the Potter's on little Peter's information and met his downfall," Cassie said cruelly.
Pettigrew leapt back once more, gazing at the quartet in terror. "Right," Sirius sneered, "and they're not all in Azkaban are they? Imagine if they ever got wind he was alive. . ." "Don't know what you're talking about," Pettigrew panted, taking yet another step back. It didn't matter, not really, there was nowhere for him to go. Pettigrew mopped his pasty face on his sleeve and looked pleadingly up at Remus.
"You don't believe this—this madness do you Remus?" he asked rather shrilly. Remus regarded Pettigrew with a coldness that seemed to mask barely contained anger. "Well, considering I believed you to be dead for over a decade perhaps my judgment shouldn't be trusted," Remus said evenly. More color drained from Pettigrew's face. Truthfully it was a wonder he had any blood left.
He then turned his beady gaze on Cassie. "Cassie, Cassie, you're a rational woman, surely you don't believe--" "Do you remember when Regulus died, Peter?" Cassie said, gripping her wand so tight her knuckles had turned white. "Ever since I saw your picture in the paper, I've been thinking about what you said at that Order meeting after he died," she said tensely, "do you remember what you said?" Pettigrew shook his head mutely, his face shiny with sweat.
"You said, 'Well, if—if it happened t-to Regulus then no one's s—safe are they?' I didn't thing much of it then, I don't think I would've known what year it was if you'd asked me given the state I was in then but I remember now," she hissed, compulsively gripping her wand. "Cassie—Cassie--" "I remember how bloody terrified you were that someone like Regulus, someone so young, could die. Is that when realized it wasn't a game?" Cassie spat. "Is that when you decided to turn to save your own skin!" Pettigrew jumped back and nearly tripped. "I didn't . . . I would never. . ." he stammered pathetically.
"I—I'm innocent!" "I find it rather odd an innocent man would willingly spend thirteen years as a filthy rodent," Snape said silkily, eyeing Pettigrew with open disdain. He believes us! Alexis realized as relief washed over him. "I—Innocent but scared!" Pettigrew shrieked, his eyes once again combing the exits. "I—I knew he'd come for me! And—and if not him than one of the Dark Lord's supporters because I sent their best man to Azkaban!"
Sirius started to raise the wand once more and this time Remus had to actually seize hold of his wasted wrist to stop him from going further. Instinctively, Alexis too reached out and took hold of the hem of Cassie's shirt. He doubted he'd really be able to stop her but Alexis at least had to try. If Cassie noticed his hold on her, she gave no sign. All that mattered was Pettigrew.
"Me, a spy for Voldemort? When did I ever hide behind friends that were stronger and more powerful than me?" Sirius growled. "Not like you! No, you always liked big friends who'd look after you. It used to be us . . . me and Remus . . .and James . . ." Pettigrew mumbled something incomprehensible, looking more terrified by the minute. "Lily and James only made you Secret-Keeper because I suggested it! It was the perfect bluff . . . Voldemort would surely go after me before he'd ever come after a weak, talent less thing like YOU!" Sirius yelled so viciously that Pettigrew actually recoiled.
"Excuse me?" Hermione interrupted nervously. "If—Scabbers—er, I mean, this man . . . he's been sleeping in Harry's dorm for three years. Why hasn't he tried to hurt Harry until now?" she pointed out reasonably. "Exactly!" Pettigrew gasped, "I would never hurt Harry! Why would I!" "I'll tell you why," Cassie said darkly. "This pathetic waste never did anything for anyone unless he could see something in it for himself. He wasn't about commit murder under Dumbledore's nose for a powerless wreck of a wizard. Oh no, he wanted to make sure Voldemort was the biggest bully on the playground before he slithered back," she sneered.
"Why else would he find a wizarding family to take him in? Keeping an ear out for news weren't you Peter? Waiting for the moment to go running back to your master?" All Pettigrew seemed to be able to do was stare at Cassie in mute horror. He seemed to have lost the ability to speak. "Excuse me," Hermione said timidly, "Er—Mr. Black—Sirius?" Sirius jumped at being addressed like that and stared at Hermione in a mixture of surprise and confusion.
Alexis could have laughed. Even in the presence of an accused murderer Hermione's politeness never failed. "If you don't mind my asking, how did you escape Azkaban without using dark magic?" she asked tentatively. "Thank you!" Pettigrew cried, "how else could he have--" Remus silenced him with a look.
Sirius frowned at Hermione but not as if he were angry at her, more like he was thinking rather hard. "I don't know how I did it," he said honestly. "I think the only reason I never lost my mind is because I knew I was innocent. That wasn't a happy feeling, so the Dementors couldn't suck it out of me," Sirius said slowly. "But it kept me sane and knowing who I was . . . helped me keep my powers so that when it—it became too much I could become a dog in my cell. . ." Sirius swallowed and took a deep breath, his bent hands trembling.
Cassie reached out and laced her thin fingers with her brother's. "Dementors can't see, they feel their way toward people by feeding off their emotions so when they felt my emotions become less complex, less human, they just assumed I was losing my mind like everyone else." Sirius smiled bitterly. "Believe me, it didn't trouble me," he said quietly. "I was too weak to be able to drive them away from me without a wand—but then I saw Peter in that picture. . .at Hogwarts with my son and Harry," Sirius went on, his voice becoming stronger, his grip on Cassie's hand becoming tighter as if he were taking strength from her.
"He was poised to strike, ready to deliver the last Potter and youngest Black to Voldemort's allies. If he gave them Harry, who'd dare say he betrayed Voldemort?" He'd be welcome back with honors, Alexis thought bitterly. "So I had to do something, I was the only one who knew Peter was still alive . . . It became an obsession," he said quietly. "It wasn't a happy feeling but it gave me strength, cleared my head. And one night when they opened my door to bring in food, I slipped passed them as a dog . . . I was more than thin enough to slip through the bars . . . I swam to the mainland as a dog and traveled here, to Hogwarts. I've been living in the forest ever since, except when I came to watch the Quidditch." His gaze settled on Harry and Alexis. "You both fly so well," he said softly.
Sirius looked at Harry but this time Harry didn't look away. "Believe me, Harry," he croaked. "I would have never betrayed Lily and James, I would have died first." And finally, at long last, Harry nodded.