AN: Ok, so I have a question for you all. Does anyone else feel disappointed in season seven? I mean, it seems like almost everyone wants to overlook the lack of reactions between Luke and Lorelai and just focus on the two of them finding their way back together. I'm sorry, but no. I'm not one of those. I want Luke and Lorelai to act like themselves before I start caring about the storyline. Cause if they feel like strangers, then what does it matter what happens in the show? The show at the moment feels like a bad fanfic I just want to give up on reading. The first episode was good enough for me, that's because my spoiled self was promised a breakdown in the second episode. I thought it was gonna happen after Luke drove off, but it didn't. Then I thought it was gonna happen after the run-in they had in the street, but it didn't. So finally Luke says the one thing worse than his pretending not to care about what happened: that he thinks they maybe just weren't meant to be. So I think, ok, finally there's gonna be the big breakdown I've been waiting for. She was sobbing on the COUCH! We got more reaction out of her when she broke up with Max the FIRST time. Now I'm disappointed and angry. The show's Luke and Lorelai have become these strangers. They're not Luke and Lorelai. They're LL's apathic twins: Duke and Morelai. I'm angry and disappointed in the show and I'm close to just stop watching, because my beloved characters doesn't feel real anymore.
AN2: Shoutout to my faithful beta, Steph. Love you!
gilmorian - WOW, this must be the very first positive/negative review I've received ever! LOL. You really have no idea how much I enjoyed reading YOUR review, because you're completely honest without either sugarcoating or being mean. And I appreciate that type of honesty. I agree I might be extreme with taking my time, but I think I'm also testing my own patience by writing this. Don't worry, many things that you're waiting for will happen soon enough and I'm sorry the road may be long. I like to view this fic like a, well I don't know the name of the graph, but anyways. At first as time passes it barely grows... then it starts growing more and more and more and then it starts growing real rapidly... That is how I like to describe the pattern of the changes I'm making, at first things are going really slow, really little change, but as more and more time, more changes happen... like the ripples in the water continues to grow... And trust me when I say the baby's birth is one big catalyst for change... lol, that's not spoilery, is it?
cywen69 - I think you've missunderstood something. I don't follow the show for the sake of following the show. I make changes where it's plausable that the change was made. The Jess storyline would've followed the show if Lorelai hadn't confronted him, but since she did. His story follows a different path from the show. And you'll find that several other events will change as well, it's just the events untouched by Lorelai's changes that remains the same, if that makes sense.
kinofille2 - Another missunderstanding. I said total 100+ chapters, not that there would be 100+ more chapters coming. If the total ends up with being more than that, then just great. But the number of chapters was not meant to be a threat. I already said the baby's a big catalyst for change. Lorelai's pregnancy won't last that much longer. There are still a couple of chapters left, maybe more than a couple, but the birth is approaching.
delen2000 - YAY, I won another one over to my format. My evil plot to rule the world is one step closer, mwuahaha... I'm not saying how she'll tell him, but I can tell you it's neither of your two fears.
LukeNLorelaifanatic - Honestly, when I said I was gonna make plenty of LL before the end of the fic, you expected only 9-14 more chapters? The logic in that is missing, please find it for me, k?
fee-kh - Genius noggin? I like that :P I love hearing you come up with various ways for Luke to find out, keep it up, lets see if you can manage to guess the actual one eventually :P
There were times Luke found himself wondering why he'd decided to stay behind in Stars Hollow when a large percentage of the people he went to school with hadn't. It wasn't that he didn't love the town in his own way, despite his less-than-thrilled appearance. Ever since he was a kid, he'd known he wanted exactly two things; to work at his fathers hardware store and live in old man Twickham's house, without old man Twickham being there, of course. Now, the hardware store may have become a diner after his fathers death and old man Twickham was still very much alive; much to everyone's surprise, as the man had been on his deathbed since around the time Luke started college. And even though he had yet to fulfill that dream of his and his first marriage had gone straight down the drain, the boy in him was sated, for now. He chuckled at the thought, his first marriage. Luke had never really viewed himself as the marrying type and certainly not the one who got married more than once, yet he had... to a lawyer, even. Luke found himself struggling to pinpoint two things about him and Nicole. Why had they gotten married? And what was it that had gone so wrong, so quickly?
When he'd first met Nicole there had been something about her, some quality that appealed to him. Sure she was an attractive woman, and any man would be lying if they didn't call that a bonus, but there was something else about her that caught his attention, other than the gut thing. Luke had a theory that, within the first few seconds one would know if one felt comfortable with another person. There were only a few people he'd felt it with. Other than Lorelai, who he'd come to view and depend on as his best friend and her daughter by extension, he'd felt it with three women, Rachel, Anna, and now Nicole. But with exception of the gut thing, there was something else, some familiarity that he just couldn't pinpoint. But what did it matter? They were divorcing, breaking up, so what did it matter whatever it was that had caught his attention?
He was now experiencing the annoyance that was divorce negotiations. How many ways could a man say that he wanted nothing else, than to get it over with? It seemed to him that he'd had a visit from every stinkin' lawyer from that firm. All that was left was for Nicole to take on the divorce case, herself. As if that wasn't bad enough in itself, he could feel the town's eyes on him. He felt as though his problems were merely entertainment for his fellow townspeople. He didn't even want to begin with what Lorelai must be going through. Despite her slight avoidance of the diner, which hadn't gone unnoticed by him, he had more than once caught a glimpse of her through the windows of the diner, as she'd attempted avoiding the many questions from certain townspeople. True, he too was curious of this new predicament of hers, especially her tactical way of changing the subject whenever a pregnancy-related question surfaced during any conversation.
Whenever the thought of Lorelai once again having to raise a kid all by herself emerged, Luke couldn't help but feel an icy chill go down his spine. It wasn't right. Luke was rarely a violent person, but thinking about whatever deadbeat it was that had left Lorelai to fend by herself, again, made him want to slam his fist into the person's face. He thought back to a couple of months ago, when he had ranted away about absent fathers, absolutely furious over Jimmy weaseling his way back into Jess' life after being absent the kid's whole life. Lorelai had been pregnant then. Luke hoped she would confide in him who the baby's father was, so that he could give the guy a piece of his mind.
Adding this to the toaster breaking down yet again, as well as him having to deal with more unnecessary crap from Nicole's divorce lawyers. How difficult can it be to answer a simple question like 'where do I sign'? Luke was in a pretty crappy mood, when he noticed Lorelai approaching the diner. As the door opened, in the seconds before their eyes met, Luke took in the view of her curvy form. He never thought he'd think it, but even pregnancy seemed to flatter the woman in front of him. When their gazes met, she gave him a slightly tired smile as she walked over, something that indicated a very long day.
- Coffee, she begged, as she plopped onto the chair in front of him, her purse hitting the counter.
As experience told him she was in no mood to hear it, Luke refrained from giving her the good old lecture, knowing very well it wouldn't work in his favor anyway, as well as it would put Lorelai in even a more foul mood. Instead he grabbed both the decaf and regular pots and poured her his Lorelai special.
- Oy there, remember our deal, Lorelai warned, using one of her favorite words to do so.
Luke shook his head in annoyance as he felt her eyes drill a hole in the back of his skull. Nevertheless, he honored their spoken agreement and poured a little more caffeinated coffee into the mix than decaf. He was surprised she could even tell the difference.
When he handed her the cup, she proceeded to mock-taste the coffee, as if she was a wine fanatic tasting wine in a fancy restaurant.
- Hmm, she said. - It needs little more caffeine.
Tempted to just remove the cup from her altogether, Luke just rolled his eyes and added a little more regular coffee in her cup.
- You look nice, he commented, finally noticing what she was wearing.
It wasn't unusual for Lorelai to dress up. Every Friday night came to mind, but today wasn't a Friday. Also, ever since she had started showing and the pregnancy itself had begun taking it's toll, Lorelai had taken to make comfort a priority rather than style in her choice of clothes.
- What's the occasion, he asked.
- Aaron Thompson's eighth birthday party, Lorelai answered, taking a sip of her coffee.
- Oh, right. The catering gig. How did that go?
- Well, the theme was a hit. The kids loved all the costumes and effects, not to mention the weapons...
- You brought weapons to an eight year old's birthday party, Luke exclaimed in disbelief.
- I didn't, Lorelai emphathized.
- Oh, Luke replied, catching on.
- Luckily we only had minor injuries. A small bruise on one kid's upper arm from a little fencing accident and another one dropped his sword on his own foot. But once we sat them all down with the movie, we confiscated all the weapons and locked them in the jeep for safekeeping.
- How did they like that, Luke wondered.
- Oh there were some slight protests, but after I told them that even the Fellowship had to turn in their weapons before they could go visit the king of Rohan, they all gave in.
- King of what?
- Don't tell me you never saw the Lord of the Rings, Lorelai said in shock.
- I tried reading the book when I was a kid, Luke shrugged. - I never made it through the Rivendell meeting.
- Of course you didn't, it was a hundred pages long, God damnit. Few who enters that meeting comes out again, Lorelai pointed out. - But that's the great thing about movies, they cut out all the crap and leaves us with the good stuff. It's called editing.
- I never saw the movie.
- Movies, Lorelai corrected. - And you have to see them. It's one of those things you can't go through life and not see, unless you're one of those booknerds who whine about how Arwen wasn't supposed to be that important of a role. And whatever happened to what's-his-face, whose lines was given to Treebeard instead.
- Who, Luke asked.
- I feel sad for you, Luke, Lorelai said, with a pitying look.
- So, how did the kids react when they didn't get the weapons back after the movie, Luke asked, changing the subject.
- Luckily the movie's extremely long, which gave them all plenty of time to forget all about the weapons. Plus the minute the movie was over it was time for food. Another fun chapter in the Independence catering company's tale.
- Why? What happened?
- Sookie happened, Lorelai answered.
- What did she do?
- I can tell you something she didn't do; make food for the kids.
- She didn't?
- Nothing she could get them to eat anyways. She tried placing a chafing dish in the middle of one of the tables. She'd made brie. She even offered one of the kids gravlax. The mac'n cheese was green from a jalapeno cream sauce and the chocolate cake was rum-raisin with a tropical fruit ganache. Already anticipating disaster I had one of the servers run to the market to get some frozen pizzas and some cupcakes from the bakery. Financially we barely broke even after paying the servants and calculating in the extra food Sookie had prepared.
- You'll do better next time, Luke said, comfortingly.
- That's what I told Sookie after cheering up the poor girl that started crying.
- One of the kids started crying?
- Sookie got a little stressed out with my taking over her part of the job, Lorelai explained. - And the kid just walked in at the worst timing and Sookie kinda snapped. Like I said, I took care of it, but once the girl was out the door, Sookie had a meltdown.
- Geez, I'm getting stressed out just hearing about it, Luke remarked.
- Hence my immense need for caffeine right now, Lorelai replied, holding out her cup.
Taking pity on her, Luke ignored his own rule and let her have a regular cup of coffee.
- Just this one, he told her. - And you're having a salad afterwards.
- Terms accepted, Lorelai replied, happily sipping her coffee.
- What was Sookie's meltdown all about?
- Basically it boiled down to her not wanting to be pregnant anymore.
- Great timing, Luke replied, dryly.
- Yeah, Lorelai chuckled. - Can't say I blame her, though. I had a similar crisis when I was pregnant with Rory.
- Hey, you were sixteen, Luke shrugged. - It wasn't exactly planned.
- I know, Lorelai nodded. - It's not the same situation, but it's the same feelings that goes through you. The same questions. 'How am I gonna do this?', 'Will my baby love me?', 'Am I gonna fail miserably?'
Luke carefully eyed her. He started to suspect this was no longer about Sookie or whatever it was Lorelai had been feeling two decades ago.
- I know I shouldn't worry, Lorelai sighed, confirming his suspicions. - I mean, I've done it. I've raised a kid, an amazing kid at that. She's out of the nest, finding her own way in the world and I even managed to prevent her from making the same mistakes I did while growing up. She has options, she has dreams that I know she'll succeed at.
- But.., Luke helped.
- But I can't help but think that with this kid everything will be different. Rory and I grew up together. We've been best friends first, because we were so close in age and all we had was each other. Even when I was working hard, Rory was with me, because we lived at my job, so we were always together. That's not gonna happen with this one, is it?
- That doesn't mean you won't be a great mother to this kid as well, Luke pointed out.
- I guess, Lorelai sighed. - But I still don't know how I'm gonna handle this. If I have a girl, I know it won't be another Rory, she'll be her own person, but what if I end up comparing her to her older sister? And if I have a boy... I know nothing about little boys, what they like and don't like. What do I do then?
- Every kid's unique and you'll learn to know what they like as they get bigger, Luke reasoned. - Besides, if you end up needing advice about boy activities and interests, then you know you can always come to me.
- Thanks, Lorelai replied, gratefully and chuckled. - You must think I'm a big mess.
- No, Luke said, shaking his head. - Hormonal? Maybe. Crazy? Definitely. A mess? Never.
Lorelai's eyes were slightly blank and she silently sniffled. Luke suspected her hormones were working full time.
- How is it you always know the right thing to say, she asked.
- I listen, he shrugged.
Lorelai nodded as she instinctively patted her belly.
- I know you said that if you met the right person, kids would be a discussion, she said. - But can you see yourself as a father?
Luke remembered when he and Lorelai had that talk about kids a year before while he had fixed her shoe for the dance marathon. He didn't know why he'd told her that. Something in him just wanted Lorelai to know that he wasn't as anti-kid as he'd appeared when he'd commented on Jackson's four kids-in-four-years plan being nothing short of crazy. And as he thought about his statement he guessed he could stand for the statement. He hadn't really thought that much about having kids of his own and back then he hadn't even had a significant other present, so there had really been no reason to consider whether or not he wanted to have kids. But could he see himself as a father?
- I don't know, he shrugged. - I haven't really given it that much thought. I mean, I definitely don't think I'd do well right now, with everything that's going on. But one day, maybe.
- Yeah, Lorelai muttered, absently.
- But that's just me, Luke elaborated, noticing the change in her tone. - You'll do great. And if there's anything you need help with, I'm here.
- I know, Lorelai nodded.
Luke couldn't help but think that she didn't sound all that convinced, or maybe something else was bothering her. He wanted to ask her, but he knew that usually when Lorelai wanted to share something with him, she did and when she didn't, there was no point in asking.
- Hey, do you think you can make that salad to go? It's been a long day and I just want to get some rest.
- Sure, Luke said, confused.
It took him the total of two minutes to prepare the salad and Lorelai had already slipped her jacket back on and was ready to leave. And as he watched her leave, Luke couldn't shake the feeling that he had said something wrong.
TBC