"All right." Said Sengoku as the entire team stood outside the bathroom that still had the chair wedged under the handle. "Does everyone know what they're doing?"
"Are you sure we should do this?" said Oishi. "I mean, he's been in the bathroom all day and we haven't heard anything in a while."
"Well that's exactly why we have to do it." Said Sengoku. "Shishido hasn't gotten an opportunity to sleep outside yet like the rest of us have."
Itsuki raised his hand.
"Except Itsuki of course." Sengoku quickly corrected himself. "So we have to give him that chance or else it won't be fair."
"So can we run through the plan again?" Kamio asked.
"Okay." Said Sengoku, looking annoyed. "I open the door…" Sengoku paused. "You guys all grab him while I open the front door… and then we throw him outside before he even has a chance to realize what's going on!"
The others stared at him blankly.
"Just do it." Said Sengoku. "On the count of three. One…two… THREE!"
Sengoku flung open the door and everyone braced themselves to be attacked by the nuclear explosion that is Shishido, but instead they just found one of the most pitiful sights of their LIVES.
Shishido was curled up on the bathroom floor with a single small towel draped over him, teeth chattering.
So they stopped.
Then they looked at each other.
"Hey, it's cold in here, isn't it?" said Itsuki.
"Yeah, I turned the air conditioning up before we left so it'd be nice in here when we got home." Said Kamio. "But I guess since the door was shut in here all the cold air kind of just gathered."
"Oh stop being a baby!" said Sengoku to Shishido. "It's not THAT cold!"
Oishi lifted the towel up and observed. "His clothes are still wet." He said.
"Eeeeeeee…" said Sengoku just like I Love Lucy.
That's when Shishido finally seemed to notice them.
"Oh… hi guys…" he said with a big dopey smile on his face.
"Uh…hi Shishido." They waved nervously at him.
"Are you feeling okay, Shishido?" Oishi asked.
"Oh, I'm feeling FINE…" said Shishido, still smiling. "You guys look great."
"I think he's delirious." Kamio whispered to Oishi.
"Okay, Shishido is officially ACTUALLY sick!" Oishi announced. "I have made the diagnosis right now!"
"So what does that mean?" said Sengoku with a raised eyebrow. "I bet you're not going to let me make him sleep outside, are you?"
"Definitely not." Said Oishi. "Let's move him to a bed."
Everyone worked together to lift Shishido up off the ground and carry him into the Parent's room, even though Sengoku was yelling, "NOT THE BIG BED! NOT THE BIG BED!"
They put him in the bed, and just kind of threw an arbitrary pair of pajamas at him before running out of the room and closing the door.
"I feel kind of bad now." Said Itsuki.
"Yeah…" the others agreed.
"Hey guys, let's look on the bright side." Said Sengoku. "We have TWO televisions now!"
He ran into the living room and pointed at the two televisions side by side with great enthusiasm.
"What's up with that?" said Itsuki.
"That's wicked re-tahhh-ded." Remarked Kamio.
Team Six"Out of all the things we could have gotten, Kaidou picks the plant." Oshitari said to the twins as they watched Kaidou out the window while he tended to his new plant that he had taken the time to put into the ground. He had also hung up his birdhouse right above it as well, and dubbed that area 'Kaidou's Korner' (with backwards K's of COURSE!) and even put up a 'No Trespassing' sign.
"We could have gotten another couch." Said Ryou.
"We could have gotten ANYTHING ELSE." Atsushi commented.
They all watched him for a little while.
"Do you think he and Akutsu are really going to have their rumble tonight?" Oshitari asked.
The other two shrugged.
Just then, the front door slammed open and Akutsu came stomping in, leaving big Akutsu-sized footprints in the floor right next to the Kaidou-sized ones that had been left there days earlier.
"EVERYONE!" he yelled.
"Uh…yes?" they said, diving for the helmets and putting them on.
"I've decided…" he said, taking his own helmet off for the first time in forever. So he had intense helmet hair. "That being safe is for pussies!"
The three stared at him.
"So no more helmets and no more safety!" Akutsu announced, slamming his helmet down on the table so it collapsed and broke into a hundred thousand trillion million zillion tiny pieces.
He wiped his hands off and looked satisfied with his mess.
"You know," said Oshitari as he took off his helmet and calmly put it under his arm without feeling the need to break anything. "We JUST got that table back."
"Like an hour ago." Ryou added.
"Now it's broken." Atsushi finished.
"So?" said Akutsu. "Do something about it."
"What can we do?" Oshitari said.
"Fix it." Akutsu said as if it was obvious.
"That's impossible." Said Ryou. "It's in a hundred thousand trillion million zillion tiny pieces."
"That's a lot of pieces." Atsushi said. "Do you KNOW how many pieces that is?"
"Seriously, if we got that many paperclips and put them all in a barrel, we'd need a ridiculously huge barrel." Said Oshitari. "Probably the size of a water tower."
"WHATEVER." Said Akutsu. "DON'T fix it then!"
"Obviously." Said Ryou.
"You know, I don't appreciate your attitude." Said Akutsu, threateningly approaching Ryou.
Ryou hid under his own hands and winced just as the back door opened.
There stood…KAIDOU! With a light behind him! And the wind blowing! And a determined expression! And fertilizer on his pants! With a bag of birdseed in his hand! And a watering pail in his other hand!
"That's quite an entrance." Said Akutsu.
Kaidou only grunted angrily at Akutsu.
Akutsu grunted back.
"Oh it's on now." Atsushi said. "It's ON."
"OMG it's ON!" said Ryou.
"It is SO on." Said Kaidou.
"Midnight." Said Akutsu. "Be there or be square. And trust me, you don't want to be square."
"Trust me, you don't want to be THERE." Said Kaidou.
Akutsu looked confused. "What?" he said.
Kaidou looked annoyed. "Because I'm going to beat you up." He clarified. "It doesn't work if I have to EXPLAIN it to you."
"Well…I knew that!" said Akutsu.
"Is it still on?" questioned Oshitari.
"OH IT'S ON!" said Kaidou and Akutsu as more lightning bolts shot back and forth and fire exploded behind them.
Team Seven"Hm…"
Inui stood by the window, looking constantly back and forth between his data book and the sky.
"Check." Said Renji as he moved his bishop into place.
Sanada hastily moved his king.
"Hm…" Inui said again.
Tetsu looked around to see if anyone was watching him cheat at Solitaire so he could have the personal satisfaction of winning, even if he was playing a game like Solitaire.
"Hm…" Inui sounded more and more perplexed.
Jirou was snoring loudly, while clutching onto the brand new disco ball they had received as if it were his teddy bear.
"Hm…hm…"
"Inui, could you please stop doing that?" Sanada requested. "I'm trying to concentrate."
"Why not ask Jirou to stop snoring?" Inui questioned.
"How am I supposed to ask Jirou to stop snoring?" Said Sanada. "He's sleeping right now. Hence the snoring. He's SLEEPING…hence snoring."
"Wake him up then." Renji suggested. "That would stop his snoring. Check."
"Tetsu, wake up Jirou." Sanada commanded.
"Okay…" said Tetsu as he put his cards down and went to the light switch. He turned the lights off and the disco ball attached to the ceiling started up, emitting colors and lights and all sorts of other grand things.
Jirou immediately stopped snoring and his eyes opened.
"DISCO BALL!" he shouted.
Then he looked at what he was clinging onto.
"ANOTHER DISCO BALL!" he shouted LOUDER.
He got up and commenced his dancing as everyone stared at him.
"All right, that's enough." Sanada gestured to Tetsu.
Tetsu turned the lights back on, which turned the disco ball off. Jirou looked disappointed for a couple of seconds, but then yawned and fell back asleep. This time, he wasn't snoring.
"That worked." Said Sanada.
"Of course it worked." Said Inui. "It was my idea."
"Mm…" said Tetsu as he sat back down to continue his game of Solitaire. You know, the one he's cheating at. But he's only cheating himself.
There was silence again in the living room.
"Hm…" Inui mumbled.
"Inui, I asked you to stop that." Said Sanada as he moved his queen. "Check." He declared proudly.
Renji studied the board and then moved his knight, taking the queen.
"Hey!" said Sanada with a pout.
"Hm…" Inui said.
"Why do you have to keep doing that?" Tetsu asked.
"Because it's about to rain." Inui turned around, and as soon as he did, the skies erupted with thunder and it immediately started pouring like in the BIBLE. The rain on the roof was so noisy it sounded like someone was dropping golf balls on it.
"Hm…" Inui recorded this in his data book as Sanada slowly stood up and looked out the window.
Renji moved his pawn forward one space. "Checkmate." he stated.
Team Eight"I must say, Atobe, this time around you did a good job." Said Yuuta. "And I'd definitely be the last person to admit that you did a good job so that's certainly saying something."
"No, I would be the last person to say he did a good job." Said Jackal.
"No, it would definitely be me!" argued Bane.
"But I thought—" Shinji began.
"Let's not argue over trifles." Said Atobe.
"Well, yeah, you're right." Yuuta said. "We got an extra set of bunk beds, which is great because now me and Shinji don't have to fight over the couch anymore."
"We all have a place to sleep now." Said Bane.
"What a relief." Shinji agreed.
"And you also got us our television back." Said Yuuta.
"WHICH IS AWESOME." Said everyone else.
"Yes, now we don't have to go outside or do anything except watch television." Shinji said.
"Well, I figured you all deserved it for being so well behaved over the past couple of days." Atobe said.
No one knew how to respond to that.
"What's that supposed to mean?" Jackal said finally.
"Oh nothing." Said Atobe, taking a sip of his tea.
"Well, now that we're all on better terms, there are a few things we would like to discuss with you, Atobe." Said Yuuta. "You can keep the bed and that room. We won't bother with that anymore."
"Good, because your bothering over it was certainly getting annoying." Atobe said.
Yuuta frowned. "So… we just have a few requests." He went on. "Guys?"
"No more singing in the shower." Jackal said. "Unless your singing is lowered to a quiet hum."
"No more condescending remarks." Bane said.
"No more putting your hand up in front of your face like this." Shinji said as he demonstrated. "I don't know why, but I've just never really liked it when you did that."
"And no more opening our mail." Yuuta added.
Atobe looked disappointed with his family unit.
"Why are all these restrictions pinned solely on me?" he said.
"Because you're the only one who's so annoying that you need restrictions such as the ones we just mentioned." Said Jackal. "And we didn't even really mention all of them."
"Well, now that I've seen your attitudes, I'm starting to think I should have just requested something useless like the potted plant or the wading pool." Said Atobe as he stood up and put his hand in front of face.
"God damn it!" said Shinji angrily.
"So I shall retire for the night." Said Atobe as he started backing up into the Parents room. "I hope all of you fail to sleep comfortable in the bunk beds I sought to win you. And I hope every time you watch television, you think of how you have so wronged me."
He shut the door.
The remaining family gave heavy sighs and looked at each other with hopeless expressions.
"He's sort of right…" said Jackal. "But he's just SO ANNOYING…"
"I'm not apologizing, if that's what he expects." Said Bane.
"He put his hand in front of his face like that JUST to annoy me." Shinji crossed his arms childishly.
Yuuta stared at the closed door with vengeance in his eyes; and such vengeance has only been seen in his eyes whence he watches Fuji perform superiorly to him in tennis! THAT'S how vengeful he was!
"Guys," he said, sounding overly dramatic as he looked at them over his shoulder. "I still hate him."