The closer Julie got to the clubhouse. the more angry she became. After everything they'd been through together, after every hurdle and hoop they'd jumped to be together, Julie thought at the very least Jax could return her text messages. She deserved that much and she deserved an explanation and she was going to get one. Even if it caused a scene.
She slammed the car the car into park and slammed the car door just because she felt like it as she got out.
"Fuck it I hope I cause a scene cocky bastard deserves it…" she said to herself. Julie swept in to the club.
"Pixie's hot and I aint talking about her bod." Juice called out. Jax, Opie and Tim all turned and Clay and Gemma emerged from the back as Chibs strolled in from the shop.
"Shit I know that look and I'm hidin' because for once I didn't do it." Tim said.
"Julie Honey," Jax tried treading carefully.
"I just wanna know one thing then I'll leave, which should be a relief to you seeing as how you've ignored me for the past two weeks."
"Jules I-"
"Did I do something wrong?"
"No I've just-"
"So you're friend being back and the fact that he doesn't like me makes you a whole new form of asshole is that it?"
"It's not that I don't like you, kid. You just remind me of someone," said Opie,
She laughed. "I've dealt with Gemma you don't scare me dude."
Gemma smiled. "I like royally pissed Pixie."
"Remember something for me Jax before you make whatever decision you're trying to make by avoiding me. 'Equal traitors be she and his sense.'
"You don't want me then at least be man enough to decide for yourself." She turned and left, leaving him choking on her dust.
Tim whistled lowly. "That's as pissed as I've seen her since Seven left without telling her goodbye."
--//--
Julie sat on the couch waiting for Jax to come in. When he came in, he saw her and exhaled carefully. "Nice show you put on."
"At least I caught your attention."
"What do you want from me, Pixie?"
"Just an answer. What is your problem Jax? you've barely spoken to me or touched me since your friend came back. What did I do?"
"Nothing."
"That's obviously a lie Jackson, just tell me what's wrong so we can fix it."
"Fix it? Do you really want to fix things? Be honest, Julie."
"Yes, I do what is wrong with you?"
"If it's not about love with me then what the fuck are we doing this for Julie?"
"Ok, first of all you shouldn't listen on people's conversations it's really goddamned rude and second I said it didn't start out that way. I never said that it was still that way!"
"And you still love him Julie!"
"Not all love has to be just one thing Jax. We're friends and I love him in the same you'll always love Tara its complicated and I can't cut him out of my life because you are jealous or whatever this is!"
"He follows you around like a fucking puppy!"
"He doesn't follow me around Jax we finally got to be friends again that's all and we like spending time together jealousy doesn't become you Jax."
"I feel like I'm swimming against the current here Jules, it seems like every little step we make we get knocked back four… you're young Julie really young and I didn't think it mattered until you took me home and it does matter. You have your whole life in front of you and I'm not sure you're meant to stay here…I'm not sure we belong together…I love you and it's because of that I don't ever want to hold you back-"
"Are you breaking up with me?"
"I…I don't know Pixie. I know I definitely don't want to but I think we both need some space to figure this out…Damn it Julie don't cry."
"What did you expect me to do?" she yelled getting up "Don't leave don't be like this baby."
"You want space Jackson you got it." she slammed the door behind her.
She came back and began stuffing her things haphazardly into a huge laundry bag.
"Baby I-" Jax stammered for something to say.
"You know what really kills me Jax?" she wiped her runny nose inelegantly on her sleeve.
"What?" he whispered.
"They were right. We're all wrong for each other we couldn't do it last. "
"We could of you wouldn't have been happy in the long run."
"So, we just wasted our time?"
"No Julie, never that… come here." he gathered her to him and kissed her.
"So, it didn't work…but no one will ever be able to make me regret what we had." she nodded "Me either…"
After Jax watched her pull away. He found her red and white striped sweater thrown behind the love seat. He picked it up folding it carefully he knew he'd keep it. He hoped he'd made the right descion breaking it off with Julie.
---//---
Back in her empty apartment, Julie found herself strangely unable to cry. She felt disconnected, adrift. She flopped on the couch and turned on the television, hoping for some mindless distraction from her troubles. Flipping through the channels, the only thing worth watching was a travel program on Europe.
Julie watched as an annoying man who looked eerily like John Denver strolled through a street market in Paris. She thought of all the summer programs she didn't apply for, all of the opportunities she'd thrown away because she just couldn't stand to be away from Jax for an entire summer.
She rolled her eyes and allowed herself a bitter chuckle. Pretty stupid, giving all that up for a guy who dumped me the second things got even a little bit rough.
Julie closed her eyes and let her thoughts drift. Classes were over now and all she had in her life was working a few crappy jobs that she hated. The only thing those jobs had done were let her save loads of cash, since her scholarship covered nearly all of her school-related costs.
Her passport was sitting in her top dresser drawer, completely untouched since she'd applied for it in high school. There really was nothing stopping her from just buying a plane ticket and going anywhere. She could disappear for the whole summer. Spend the time trying to clear her head and find herself.
She could finally see all the places she'd only ever dreamed about. Paris. Prague. Moscow. Berlin. London. Stockholm. Venice. Julie picked up her laptop and started looking for cheap flights to anywhere in Europe.