Chapter 36

Disclaimer: Don't own TSCC

TechCom Cafeteria…

Shuffling along, a tired John looked for his mother. Spotting Sarah picking at a salad as she read from her tablet, he carried his tray over and sat down.

"Hey."

"Hey, yourself," Sarah replied without looking up.

John ate in silence for a while hoping Sarah would look up from whatever held her attention.

"Do you want to talk," Sarah finally asked, looking up.

"Yeah, actually, I would," he replied.

"Cameron's acting different."

"Yeah, how did you know?"

"She is my daughter-in-law. I see her every day. We do talk."

John made a face at Sarah in response.

"Okay, fine, what is it that's worrying you?"

"She's just different, that's all. I can't explain it."

"Does Tin Miss still check Hailey before bed?"

"Yes."

"Does she still engage in all or most of her compulsive behaviors?"

"Uh, I think so."

"Has she tried to terminate anyone for no reason?"

"No! Nothing like that!"

"Does she still scan you every night?"

"Yes."

"Then please, John, tell me what is bothering you?"

Frustrated, John sat in silence, looking at his mother. "I can't explain it, but you noticed it too."

"John, the past three weeks have been hectic and stressful for everyone. She's not getting any younger and machines do wear out. That might be all it is."

John nodded, hoping Sarah was right.

Connor Family Bunker…

John waved good night to Derek as the two men parted after a long day. A quick glance indicated the Old Man was in his alcove, reading as usual. Both families would be safe that night.

Easing into the bunker, John walked with his habitual stealth to check on Hailey. She was sound asleep in the bottom tier of her new bunk bed. Asleep in the top bunk was Ruth. The sound of Sammy's tail striking the blanket as he wagged it was the only sound in the room. Content the girls were safe and sound John made his way to his own room.

To his surprise, Cameron was in bed and asleep. Normally she came to bed with John until he fell asleep and then as was her habit of years, patrolled until she needed the two or three hour maintenance period she referred to as Terminator Sleep as mandated by Savannah and Dr. Johnson.

Silently, John slipped out of his clothes. Before he got in bed, he looked closely at his wife's face. Gone was the eye patch covering her damaged eye. While still not completely healed, all of her biological covering had regenerated. The gaping wound had closed and was pinkish in color. Her other wounds had all healed leaving little trace Cameron had ever been injured.

Not wanting to disturb his wife, John slipped silently into the bed and braced himself for her to roll over and drape herself over him. As had happened for the past few nights, Cameron failed to do so. Instead, it seemed she instinctively moved closer to John and nestled close to him. John was almost certain he heard a sigh of contentment come from Cameron.

John turned on his side and pulled Cameron closer to him, leaving his arm around her waist. Without seeming to wake Cameron took his hand in hers and intertwined her fingers in John's. Long used to a wife who made no sounds while in maintenance mode, John decided he liked the new, slightly more relaxed version of Cameron. Within minutes, he was asleep.

Two Weeks Later in the Wastelands…

Deciding he would never get used to the cold and dark of the Wastelands, John pulled his coat tighter around his throat as he tried to warm himself. Scanning the cemetery hidden in the small valley just northwest of TechCom City he spotted Cameron.

She had been visiting the cemetery frequently since the failed attack on the city. While she had made a visit or two in the past, her current behavior, combined with other recent changes concerned John. There were no close family or friends buried in the new cemetery. The only person whose grave might make Cameron feel compelled to visit so often was Sarah. John had few doubts Cameron would not survive long after he passed away.

Since his mom was fine, Hailey was okay and Cameron and Derek had engaged in one of their petty arguments just the other night, complete with a staring contest Derek lost, John was concerned. This new compulsion was troubling.

Approaching from behind, John could hear Cameron talking out loud. Pausing to scan the area again with his night vision glasses, John failed to locate whom his wife was talking to. Cameron never talked to herself, making this new behavior even more troubling. Carefully making his way closer, John strained to hear Cameron's one-sided conversation.

"I won. It's that simple! Your spawn were not up to the task, just like you weren't. My John is still mine! You bitch whore! He's safe!"

Flinching in pain at his wife's words, John felt overcome with guilt. A machine, no matter how humanlike Cameron had become, she was still a machine, felt threatened by a long dead human rival. How much pain he had caused his closest friend was unimaginable, all for a rebellious dalliance that had never meant anything to him.

John moved close enough to touch his wife before speaking, and then only not to startle her.

"Cameron."

"What John?"

"I've been listening."

"I know. I heard you over seven minutes ago."

"Why are you doing this? They're dead. They can't hurt you, or us, or our family."

Cameron turned to look at her husband, the look of hurt on her face startling John.

"Because I have to. Riley's dead and she still tried to take you from me. This time, she tried to take even more."

With a heavy heart, John took Cameron in his arms. John felt Cameron wrap her arms around him as she buried her face in his chest. He could feel her body shaking, almost as if she was sobbing uncontrollably. Having learned the hard way, John remained silent and let Cameron get whatever this was out of her system. He could feel the fingers of her left hand working furiously as her glitch made its appearance.

How much time passed before Cameron regained control, John could not guess though he knew Cameron could tell him to the second if he asked. He decided not to.

She let go of John and to his surprise, wiped actual tears from her face. Her eyes were puffy from crying and she still looked distraught.

"This is my fault isn't it," John asked somberly.

"Yes, in part," Cameron replied. "Mostly all your fault, but some of it is mine. Some of it is Riley's."

"You know she didn't mean anything to me."

"I do now, but I didn't then. I didn't understand, couldn't understand, what you saw in her. I felt so threatened. I could not protect you properly. I was just beginning to realize I had an emotional attraction, an emotional bond with you. I was overwhelmed by everything, anything involving emotions. I blamed myself and I blamed that bitch whore.

But I can understand now you were to blame as well. You should never have made me feel like I did. You should have pushed Riley away when I asked the first time I made my feelings known."

"Cameron, I was just sixteen."

"I know, that's why I chose to forgive you. You were only slightly better equipped to deal with the emotions we were dealing with than I was."

John started in surprise, annoyed. "Forgive me?"

"Yes, forgive you."

"I seem to recall you were a royal pain during this time period."

"I told you, I was to blame too."

Cameron glared at John, making him realize she was not going to back down on this.

"Okay, I was to blame too. It probably doesn't matter how much either of us was to blame. Riley's dead and that was a long time ago. Besides, you won. I chose you. I was always going to choose you."

"So you admit there was no reason to have made me suffer like you did."

John scowled at Cameron, not liking the direction of the discussion.

"I'm not sure how, or if, I want to answer that. That was a confusing time for both of us. If Riley showed up today, it's a no-brainer. She doesn't even get the time of day from me. You know Riley was really nothing more than a way to rebel against mom's control and to get a little space from you."

"Yeah, well you hurt me," Cameron petulantly replied. "I have had issues ever since then. I should never have felt as insecure as I did in our relationship."

Annoyed, John stepped away from Cameron.

"I did everything I could to reassure you, to make you feel like you had no reason to feel that way, so don't put this all on me."

Cameron squeezed her lips together, pouting, clearly annoyed with John.

"It's in the past. I get it, John. I have my husband, my daughter and my family. I beat the bitch whore and I beat her children. I terminated the threat. I got my revenge on her!"

Cameron's visage changed from one of anger to sadness, making John realize this wasn't really about him.

"So why do I feel so bad now that I have my revenge! I have you! I have my family and I feel so empty now that Riley can NEVER threaten me again! I terminated her devil spawn myself. I proved I was the alpha female yet again. Now there is no data for my CPU you process, there is just a blank file! Why do I feel this way John?"

"Because revenge is not what it seems. Rachel deserved what happened to her. Not the merging of memories and being turned into a cyborg, certainly not that. But she certainly was self-aware. Rachel had choices. She had the ability to determine which files were uploaded memories and which were real. She chose to hate you, to do the will of the Colonel.

Oddly, if anyone could have understood what had been done to her, it was you Cameron. Rachel might have been Riley's daughter when she was born, but Skynet just used her as a template like he did Allison for you. You made good choices and overcame your evil father. Rachel did not. Her actions placed everyone in TechCom at risk. Her termination was just.

Brandon, " John paused before continuing, "Brandon loved his sister and in the end, it was misplaced. He could have had a future here. Who knows Cameron, he might have become part of our family if he had made different choices. But he chose Rachel, he hurt Ruth and he tried to kill you. The sad part is he made those choices out of misguided loyalty, perhaps love, for his sister."

"They deserved to be terminated. So why do their terminations bother me? I have never felt this way before," Cameron asked, the confusion plainly evident in her voice.

"Because, terminating Riley's children seemed to be a victory over Riley. It wasn't. She never raised those two children. She just gave birth to them and then abandoned them to get something better for herself. It was easy for Riley to justify what she did by telling herself it was best for the children. Heck, it might even have been true at the time she agreed to participate in Jesse's plan."

John stood in silence and watched his wife glare at the two small grave markers set flat in the ground over the graves. Finally, Cameron reached for his hand, indicating she was ready to leave.

As they walked back to the entrance to the tunnel that would take them safely back to the city, Cameron tugged on John's hand to get his attention.

"Are you still my John?"

Surprised by her question, John looked at his wife to see her standing, looking up at him with a mixture of hope and fear.

Embracing Cameron he held her tight before answering. "I am, and always will be, your John."

One Week Later – Connor Family Bunker…

Tired from another long day, John entered the bunker to find the lights off in the living area. He could hear the sounds of the girls laughing in Hailey's room indicating they would be sleeping there tonight. Light coming from under the door to the master bedroom told him Cameron had arrived home before him.

John stood outside Hailey's door and listened briefly to the girls talking about the twins and the movie to be shown in the Central Park this weekend. He'd seen it dozens of times on cable tv but Cameron would be dragging him along to the event. She loved old movies and never missed a chance to make him sit through one with her.

A quick trip to the family facilities to relieve himself and hang up his jacket and John was ready to go to bed and get some much needed rest. He noticed the light was off now before he entered the room, indicating Cameron had decided to sleep first and patrol later.

Changing out of his clothes, John slipped into bed next to his wife. Having broken the habit, for the most part, of draping herself over John's left side, Cameron had taken to spending her maintenance time period on her left side, facing their bedroom door, lying as close to John as possible.

Moving close to Cameron, John made himself comfortable, confident he'd be asleep in minutes.

"John," Cameron spoke softly, "hold me."

Reaching over her, John pulled his wife close and shifted again to get comfortable. He smiled as he whispered to Cameron, "I love you. You love me."

He easily visualized the pleased look on Cameron's face before she replied.

"I love you. You love me."

Cameron remained alert until John began snoring softly. She conducted a quick scan, a habit she no intention of ever breaking and nestled closer to her husband, a broad smile on her face.

"My John, Riley. My John. He chose me and now you can never threaten me again, I've seen to that."

Still smiling as she entered maintenance mode for her nightly Terminator Sleep, Cameron was at peace with her existence, confident at last John was hers.

Reviews are always appreciated. If you liked this story, you might want to consider my other TSCC stories:

Cameron Grows Up

The Future Cameron

Cameron versus the Queen

Cameron and the Black Bird

Cameron and John's Wedding

Who's the Boss?

The Storm Before the Calm