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The Chapter has some description of assault. Just a warning.
I don't own any of the walking dead characters or story lines.
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They pull in through the gates of Alexandria. Rick is standing there waiting for them. He squints at the trio as he sees Aaron's black eye. He walks around the side and sees Daryl helping Jameson out of the car. She is hurting even more today than last night. Her muscles ache from choking the guy and then stabbing the other in the chest a few dozen times. Her head and back are bruised and sore.
"What happened?!" he growls seeing her face. Her nose is swollen and bruised, she has two black eyes. They aren't swollen shut but they are remarkably purple.
"Ran into some trouble. Gotta get 'er ta the doc." Daryl says, holding Jameson's waist. She tries to walk on her own but Daryl is having none of it. She rolls her eyes at Rick and gives him a grim smile. "I'm fine." She says and pats his shoulder. Aaron follows them and walks next to Rick.
"What happened?" Rick asks Aaron as they move slowly.
"Three guys jumped us in the police station….we, Daryl and I were locked in the weapons cage." He says not able to make eye contact with the man, still riddled with guilt. Rick squints at him and asks, "What about Jameson?"
"They had her." Aaron says, his voice cracking. He looks away and stops walking. He closes his eyes, the images flashing through his mind. He shakes his head and says, "She saved herself. I don't know how. I watched it but I still don't know how she did it."
Rick stands there in shock and looks towards the clinic. "Did they….?" He can't even finish the sentence.
"One was when she got a hold of one of her knives." He says flatly, looking at the ground. "She saved of us. They said they'd let us go but they wouldn't have. Seeing her…..seeing her fight like that. She's stronger than anyone I've ever met. Not just physically. She's a survivor."
Rick nods and rubs the back of his neck. "Daryl watched this happen?" he asks looking at the man in front of him. Seeing his pained expression turn even paler. "Yeah. Never felt that much rage roll off someone. I thought he was going to tearing the wire fencing apart with his bare hands." Aaron says looking at the clinic. Rick nods and turns to go to the clinic. He turns back and says, "Come on, lets have 'em look at that lip."
Daryl is pacing behind Phillip as he looks at Jameson's wounds.
"Ya did a good job sewing her up," He tells Daryl. Daryl grunts and says, "Shoulda kept it from happen." Jameson shakes her head but doesn't reply. She knows he's going to blame himself no matter what she says.
"Your nose isn't broken, just swollen. The lump on your head is pretty big but there isn't a cut. I don't think you have a concussion. Any vomiting?" Phillip asks Jameson. She shakes her head and says, "I was dizzy at first but nothing later on. Just tender."
He nods and unwraps her wrist. He grimaces at the raw skin. "Ouch. What kinda ties were these?" he asks, gently probing the wounds. Jameson hisses and Daryl steps forward. He wants to punch the guy for hurting her.
"Daryl I'm fine. He's gotta check 'em. They were plastic zip ties." She tells the doctor.
"K, good. Better than rusty wire or something." He says mainly to himself.
Phillip cleans them as gently as he can. "Don't need stitches but we'll keep them wrapped, change 'em daily. Any other injuries?" he asks and adds quietly, "Do you need a pelvic. exam?"
She shakes her head, glancing at Daryl. He growls and pacing even more aggressively. Phillip watches him and turns back to Jameson. "Are you sure?" he asks. Daryl snaps, "She said no!"
"Daryl, stop. It didn't get that far. I am ok." She states clearly and firmly looking at Daryl rather that the doctor. Phillip nods and tells her he will get her some antibiotics and pain meds. He recommends resting for a week to let the wound on her stomach time to mend and she will need to be careful using any weapons with her left hand for two weeks. When he leaves the room Rick knocks on the open door frame and asks if he can come in. Daryl nods and crosses the room, standing at the window.
"How ya feelin?" he asks her. She smiles sadly and says, "I'm fine."
"Ya ain't fine godamnit. Ya almost died! How can ya say yer fine?" Daryl hollers, he can't contain his anger and he knows he is lashing out but can't stop himself.
"Daryl, please stop." She says weakly looking at him. She knows he's hurting from witnessing her being attacked. She can't imagine what he must have felt seeing it happen. She saw him held hostage by the two men in the forest but they weren't hurting him or threatening to violate him in front of her. She felt true terror when she witnessed just their threats. Watching him be attacked would've killed her.
Daryl shakes his head and looks away. Rick bites his lip and tries to decide what to ask that won't piss Daryl off. He doesn't want to set Daryl off again.
"Will they be a problem?" he asks quietly.
"They won't be a problem for anyone ever again," she says flatly looking at him with hate in her eyes. She clenches her jaw and looks down at her bloodied hands. She pretty much dug a huge hole into his chest cavity with her knife. She has scratched the skin off her knuckles on his jagged broken ribs. Rick looks at her hands. He sees the damage and sees blood caked under her nails. He reaches out and takes one of her hands, gently squeezing it.
"Ya did good." He says, looking at her trying to convey his complete honesty. He turns and watches Daryl gnawing on his thumb. "Do we need to go back?" he asks him.
"No we got everything." Daryl tells him chewing on his lip. "Found a lot of food at a cabin." Rick nods and then tells them to rest up, that they don't need to worry about any duties for the next few days. Daryl doesn't respond he just stares out the window. He keeps picturing Jameson's bloody face as the bastard stands behind her. He growls without knowing it and rolls his shoulders and neck. He needs to punch someone or smash something. Rick wants to reassure his brother but knows there is nothing that will appease the man yet. He knows what is like to see a loved one be attacked and almost victimized. He witnessed it with Carl that night before they got to Terminus. He knows how it breaks a part of you to feel so helpless to save someone you are supposed to protect. He hopes that Daryl can get past his rage to take care of her because no matter how strong someone is everyone has a breaking point.
Phillip brings the meds in and tells them to go home, eat and rest. Daryl helps her up but she shrugs off his help. She tells him she's ok to walk but seeing his disappointed face she tells him to stay close in case she needs him. Jameson hates seeing him in emotional pain. When he broke down and cried on her shoulder last night she felt like her heart was being ripped out. It wasn't something she'd ever thought she'd see or want to see again.
They walk home from the clinic. Jameson is walking ok but she is mainly faking it. She doesn't want to have everyone see her hobble along. Daryl can tell she's holding herself straighter than she should. He understands because he would do the same thing. No one likes to look weak. They are just arriving at their house when Jack jogs up.
"Jesus Christ Jameson. Hate to see the other guy." He remarks jokingly, not knowing what happened. She looks at him and says, "Which one?" She doesn't say anything else. Jack looks at Daryl with a worried expression. Daryl shakes his head once, telling him not to ask yet. He wants to get her settled and then he will inform her brother what happened. Normally he would tell everyone to fuck off but Jack is her brother and he deserves to know.
Daryl relays the whole event to Jack. He sat silent, glowering at the floor, flexing his fists. By the end of the story he is pacing a hole in the rug. Daryl prepares himself for her brother to beat the shit out of him for not protecting her better.
"Ain't your fault, bro," Jack says rolling his neck and shoulders. Like Daryl, he needs to punch the fuck out of something. Daryl scoffs and shakes his head. "Shoulda stopped it. That fucker…." He growls and put his head in his hands. He feels like he's swallowing glass. Jack watches him struggle and can't imagine what seeing it was like. Just hearing what happened was hard enough.
"Did he at least suffer?" Jack asks.
"She cut his dick off while he watched and then carve a 10 inch hole into his chest with a hunting knife." Daryl said grimly grinding his teeth. "That was after she stabbed him in the neck and leg."
Jack looks at him shocked for a moment and then snorts. "Well, that's my baby sister for ya."
Daryl shakes his head and suddenly laughs gruffly.
"This world is so fucked that something like that makes us laugh." Jack says scrubbing his face.
Daryl nods and says, "Yeah. See ya in hell."
They sit silently for a few minutes before Daryl tells Jack he's going to go lay down with her. Jack tells him he will check in on them in a few hours to see if they need anything.
Jameson is sitting on the back porch of the house smoking a cigarette. Daryl went on a hunt after she insisted he go relax and stop smothering her.
"Didn't know you smoke," Carl says sitting down next to her. She nods and blows smoke away from him. "Used to, stopped when they became scarce. Felt like havin' one." She explains inhaling deeply enjoying the old familiar burn.
"You doin ok?" he asks, leaning against the porch railing. Jameson nods automatically even though she is on the edge of barely ok and totally fucked.
"Ya don't have to lie if you aren't" Carl says, playing with a small pocketknife.
Jameson shrugs and says, "Fake it till you make." Carl laughs and nods. They sit silently for a few minutes, Jameson finishing her smoke and Carl carving a star into the porch railing.
"I heard what happened." Carl says quietly without making eye contact. Jameson turns and looks at the teen. She clears her throat and shrugs again.
"If you wanna talk about shit you can," He says, chewing on his bottom lip.
Jameson shakes her head and looks across the yard. She has never been one to pour her guts out but it feels like she's reaching a limit to what she can hold in.
"They said you saved yourself, Daryl and Aaron too." Carl tells her, scooting to sit next to her on the top step.
Jameson shakes her head and let her head hang, staring at the ground. "I did what I had to do but…..I went to far." She whispers, not making eye contact, biting her nail.
"Dad said you did good. That they were bad people." Carl says, trying to comfort her.
"Ya well I'm not sure I'm much different than they were," she says quietly looking at him for the first time see he moved over.
"You're a good person. You didn't attack them, they attacked you." he says firmly.
"I went batshit crazy Carl, you didn't see what I did. I…..I went too far." She says, struggling to talk about it and not explain the details.
Carl thinks for a moment and says, "I killed a boy. Back when we were in the prison. I was guarding Hershel, Beth and Judith. He came with the group attacking us. He was surrendering and I shot him."
Jameson watches him as the memories pass through his eyes. "You were defending yourself and your family."
"No I killed him after he was surrendering. I snapped too. Afterwards I didn't feel anything. " He says quietly and plays with the pocketknife, opening and closing it.
"It's not the same Carl. What I did…" She says, chewing on the inside of her cheek, "I'm a monster." She finishes in a whisper, wiping a stray tear away.
"You're not a monster. Those men were monsters. World is better without them." He says firmly. She wipes another tear away and says, "Carl you don't have try to make me feel better. Ya don't need to be dealing with a crying girl."
"I have a baby sister, I'm used to crying girls." He says with a smirk.
Jameson rolls her eyes and under her breath says, "smartass". She looks over at Carl and sees he's battling with a decision when he begins talking.
"When Michonne, my dad and I were going to Terminus, we were camping one night and some men like that found us." Carl tells her while looking away. "My dad had killed one of their guys to escape a few days earlier and they came looking for us. One guy had my dad and another had Michonne. I was in a car but a guy pulled me out." He pauses and swallows. He has never talked to anyone about that night.
"Daryl was with them," he says looking at her. Jameson eyes widen and she feels a trickle of fear go down her back, "What?" she gasps out.
"No, he didn't know what they were. He lost Beth and was all alone. He didn't know it was us they were following. He tried to stop them when he saw it was us." He assures her and then continues. "I was..the guy was on top of me….. I couldn't see him but Daryl was gettin' beaten up by the other two. My dad lost it when he saw the guy on top of me trying to…" he stops, clears his throat and continues, "anyways he killed the guy holding him. Michonne got to the one who had her. The guy holding me down, he tried to get away and my dad, he killed him but he..he lost it. Did some crazy things. There was a lot of blood. " Carl stops, biting his nails as he replays the horrific sight.
"He saw someone hurting you, its understandable to lose control in that situation." Jameson tells him.
Carl nods and says, "I was scared of him for awhile after that. I thought that we were all monsters. That the things we had done made us bad people."
Jameson chews on her lip and gets what he's trying to do.
Carl looks at her and says, "But now I know that this world, it's changed and so have we. And to survive sometimes we do bad things but it doesn't make us monsters, it makes us survivors. And sometimes surviving is so hard that it breaks parts of you but it doesn't have to always be like that." Carl says sounding far older than his age. Jameson bumps her shoulder against his.
"How'd you get so smart?" she aks with a smirk.
Carl chuckles and says, "Fake it til you make it."
Jameson laughs and shakes her head.
She puts her arm around Carl's shoulders and sees him blush. "Are you blushing Carl?" she says with a smirk. "Am I making you uncomfortable?" She wiggles her eyebrows.
"Shuddup." He grumbles and tries to pull away but she holds on.
She squeezes his shoulder and says in a serious tone, "Thanks." She lets him go.
Carl nods, still blushing. She smirks at the teen and then teases him, "So I heard there's a cute girl living near by."
Carl's face got even redder. "Shuddup." He growls. Jameson smiles widely and bumps her shoulder against his again. "Sorry I won't fuck with you Carl. Just sayin' I'm a girl 'n if you need advice on wooing let me know." She smiles kindly.
Carl shrugs and says, "I'll let ya know."
They sat for a few more minutes quietly when Rick walks around the corner. He smiles slightly and Jameson gets the impression he's heard some or all of their conversation. "How ya feelin Jameson?" he asks standing in front of the pair.
Jameson shrugs and says, "I've had worse." Rick nods and rubs the back of his neck. "Hey Carl can you go check in with Carol and see if she needs help with Judith?" he asks. Carl sighs dramatically and then smiles, "You could just say, 'Carl go away I need to talk to Jameson'."
Rick laughs and says, "Carl go away and help with your sister."
Carl nods and says, "Better."
Jameson watches the teen lope into the house and turns back to Rick.
"He's a good kid, takes after his dad." She says, pulling out another smoke. "Don't tell Daryl I've smoked two of his pack."
Rick chuckles and says, "Didn't know you smoke." Jameson shrugs a shoulder and lights her smoke. Inhaling deeply she leans back against the porch rail.
Rick sits down next to her. "Ya hear us earlier?" she asks quietly.
"Yeah." He says, nodding slightly. Jameson watches him, waiting for him to collect his thoughts.
"When I saw that happening to Carl," he pauses, swallows hard and then clears his throat. "I saw red. It was like everything stopped and all I could think of was tearing them apart. I literally tore the guy's throat out who was holding me. I saw Carl underneath that sick bastard. It was jus' him 'n me. We were in this soundless void, I couldn' hear or see anyone else. I gutted the fucker and nothing coulda stopped me stabbin' him. A switch flipped inside me 'n I felt every ounce of anger from everythin' that had ever happened since the world went ta shit. It was like all the worst parts of the world were inside that guy's chest 'n I had ta destroy it." Jameson nods and chews her lip. The thought of Carl being attacked like that in front of his dad gives her chills.
"Could….could you talk to Daryl about shit? I know he's struggling with having been there and watching." She asks, looking down at her busted hands.
"I was plannin' on it. Wanted ta let him cool down a bit." He said picking up one of her hands, turning it over to see her knuckles.
"From his ribs…I, Rick I mutilated him." she says, swallowing hard and shaking her head clear. Rick watches her closely and then pulls her into his side, wrapping an arm around her shoulders. He can practically feels the pain rolling off her.
"What happened ta ya was horrific. It was something that should never ever happen. Even the strongest of people break when they're pushed so far. You were attacked 'n fought for your life. Reactin' the way ya did is completely natural. Ya ain't a bad person because what those bastards did pushed ya over the edge. Ya lost ya'self in the heat of the moment. That type of rage burns straight through ya. I know." he says.
"I don't want ya worryin' about what ya did bein' right or wrong because the whole damn thing was wrong." He tells her, still hugging her into his side. He feels her nod and can feel his shoulder is damp. A tremor of a sob shakes through her and he wraps his other arm around her. He chews his lip, controlling his urge to join her. He glances up when he sees movement. Daryl is standing off to the side looking worried. Rick nods once letting him know she's all right. Daryl waits to make sure but goes to the side of the house to wait for her to calm down. Rick is one of the only people Daryl will trust fully to take care of Jameson if he couldn't.
Jameson takes a deep breath, blowing it out slowly and sits up. Rick pats her back and says, "Better?" He gives her a small smile. Jameson rolls her eyes and nods once. She clears her throat and says, "Thanks Rick. Sorry to weep all over you."
Rick shrugs and says, "Better than baby vomit."
Jameson shakes her head, laughing. "Not going to argue with that."
Jameson and Daryl are lying in bed. Jameson felt better after talking to Carl and Rick earlier in the day. She knew she could talk to Daryl about it but his ability to be objective about what happened is difficult having witnessed. She hopes Rick will talk to him and help him get through his guilt and anger.
"I heard ya talked to Rick 'bout stuff." Daryl says quietly while rewrapping Jameson's wrists. She nods and chews her lip. She doesn't want him to be angry for not talking to him first.
"I'm not mad," he adds having seen her worried expression.
"Just needed some perspective I guess. Talked to Carl too." She tells him. He looks up, surprised that she would talk to the boy.
"Why Carl?" He asks feeling somewhat jealous about it.
"He told me about that night on the road, when those guys you were with attacked them," she says quietly, looking down. Daryl stops his hands and then sighs. "I didn't know what they were." He whispers feeling guilt wash over him.
"I know Daryl, I just meant…..Carl told me about what happened to him. What happened after with Rick." She explains and continues, "He is a pretty perceptive kid." Daryl nods and finishes wrapping her hands. She sits back on the sofa and stares off for a while and he can tell she's not really there next to him. That she's thinking about what happened.
"Do you think we could get that desk out of here?" she asks quietly not making eye contact with him, picking at her nails. He squints for a moment trying to figure out why she wants to rearrange furniture all of a sudden but then realizes why. He looks at it and instantly remembers the scene he had watched and wants to take an ax to the damn thing.
"I can get it out now if you want me too." He says leaning forward, his elbow on his knees. Jameson swallows loudly and shakes her head. "Just maybe tomorrow."
She tells him quietly still avoiding his eyes. His chest aches and he wants to do nothing more than to scoop her up and hug her. He doesn't know how to touch her now. He feels like if he makes one wrong move he'll break her. He doesn't know if being close to her now will upset her. Daryl fears despite her outward strength that she may be crumbling inside. She has needed such a hard exterior her whole life that what is happening inside her can sometimes be a mystery to him.
"First thing tomorrow, Jack and me will do it. Promise." He says trying to get a view of her eyes. "Jameson…I, just if you wanna..I'm here. Always here for you." he stammers. Jameson lifts her eyes to his and nods. "I know." She assures him.
"You wanna get some sleep?" he asks jutting his chin to the bed. She smiles and nods.
Once they get settled under the covers Jameson scoots over and cuddles into his chest. Daryl wraps his arms around her, thankful she still wants to have contact with him. He lays his cheek against the top of her head, inhale in her scent. He smells cigarette smoke. "Ya smoke today?" he asks curiously.
Jameson hesitates and says, "Ummmmmm maybe?"
Daryl chuckles and says, "I don' care if ya do, just didn't know you did."
"I stopped when I couldn't find 'em anymore. Just felt like it today." She says tracing a scar on his chest.
"Where'd ya get 'em?" he asks suspiciously, squinting his eyes.
When Jameson doesn't answer right away he knows she swiped them from him.
"No where." She says and giggles. Daryl squeezes her and scoffs, "Ya lil' thief."
Jameson laughs louder and says, "I told you of my criminal record. Ya can't be mad at me now."
"Pffft. Ya owe me big time woman." He says gruffly but not meaning it. He strokes up and down her back feeling her relax against him. He wants to ask her if its ok to touch her like that but isn't sure if he should bring it.
"I'm ok," she says somehow reading his mind.
"Ya tell me if you're not ok?" he whispers, still stroking her back. She nods into his chest, her eyes drooping. Her breathing evens out and he can tell she's fallen asleep. He lays there listening to her breathing and can feel the steady thump of her heart against his bare chest. He wants to squeeze her and kiss her all over. The anger has lessened but the panic and fear is still going strong inside him. He knows he almost lost her. That she would've been taken from him in one the worst ways imaginable right in front of him. When he closes his eyes he still sees her scared face, blood pouring out of her nose and her eyes burning into his. Daryl doesn't sleep the entire night. He spends it reliving what he saw and then watching her sleep. Its almost as if he fears he will close his eyes and she'll disappear. He holds her close and despite not being religious, prays that he can be better at keeping her safe.
Kinda angsty but needed to get on the road to recovery. Thank you so much for reading! Let me now what you think. Also please checkout my other Jameson O'Connell/Daryl vic Cupcakes and Cigarettes.