Here is the next chapter. The long awaited sharing of the memories ;) I hope you'll like it.
Chapter 16
Sharing his memories with the Council wasn't something Obi-Wan was anxious about now. After having shown everything to Anakin, he was confident that trust in the Force was the only way to live this life. This included trusting the Jedi Council to be ready to deal with his former life appropriately. Nevertheless, he felt a little bit nervous this morning. Having multiple Force users in his own mind wasn't something he felt comfortable with, too vivid were the memories of Darth Tahrun entering his mind.
Qui-Gon did his best to reassure him and when Obi-Wan voiced his concerns, he came up with a plan to help the young man.
"You know, if the idea of them being in your mind is the one thing that bothers you, we can use our bond as a means to project your memories. In this case, you wouldn't be exposed to many intruders. It doesn't bother me to do that for you as I haven't had the same bad experiences as you."
Obi-Wan looked at him with a stunned expression. It was a solution, however, he wasn't sure he could do it. It would put Qui-Gon into the position having his mind exposed before the Councilors.
Qui-Gon smiled and obviously he had sensed Obi-Wan's thoughts. "Obi-Wan, as I said, I haven't had bad experiences of that sort until now. Besides, I am able to shield my mind and show them only the bond. It should be much easier for me than for you."
Obi-Wan nodded. His former Master was right. It was the perfect solution and he should finally learn to accept somebody's help.
"I am grateful that you're offering this. It really makes things easier for me, Qui-Gon."
Qui-Gon smiled broadly at that. He had sensed what it had cost the young man to take on his offer and he was relieved that Obi-Wan made an effort to overcome his problem. He was finally beginning to understand that he wasn't alone in this and that Qui-Gon was there to help him.
When they entered the Council chamber, Qui-Gon could feel the tension in the room vibrating in the Force. The Council had waited for this day with anticipation, but they were also anxious about what Obi-Wan would reveal. Mace nodded toward them and after friendly greetings he began to introduce how they would conduct the mind probe.
"Mace," Obi-Wan interrupted him before he was able to finish. "Excuse my rudeness, but I have to say something before we begin."
Mace inclined his head shortly. "It's you who will decide how we're going to do this, Obi-Wan. So, don't hesitate to say what you want to say."
"Thank you, Mace," the young man replied and Qui-Gon was amazed how serenely Obi-Wan was behaving in the light of the things to come. "First of all, due to my bad experiences with mind probes before, I have decided that I will project all my memories over my bond with Master Jinn. He volunteered to show these pictures to all of you."
The Council began to murmur and Qui-Gon felt that they were astonished about the self-confidence Obi-Wan showed when telling them about his weakness in this point.
"I am aware of the fact that I have to work on this weakness of mine," the Knight continued and smiled faintly. "However, at this moment I cannot guarantee what I will do, if I feel threatened because of this intrusion into my privacy. I've learned to defend myself against mind attacks and sometimes this defense happens instinctively. In my former life, I had no reason to consider that such an intrusion could be friendly."
Qui-Gon shuddered at Obi-Wan's words. Even after knowing so many of the young man's memories, he wasn't able to picture his former world, a world which was determined by a war against the Sith. He sensed that the Councilors shared his sentiment and the nod of consent coming from Mace Windu confirmed that the Council indeed was determined to proceed according to Obi-Wan's wishes.
"Thank you, Masters," Obi-Wan said, acknowledging the assent to his suggestion. "There is another point I need to tell you about before giving you knowledge about my former life. There… You will meet many faces you already know from your own reality. I want you to consider that everything that happened to them and all of their choices had been determined by things that didn't happen in this reality. I dare say, that a few of the future occurrences, you're going to see, aren't likely to happen here. No one who turned in my former life is destined to turn in this life."
Mace nodded, knowing well of whom Obi-Wan was talking. "We are aware of that fact, Obi-Wan. We have already spoken about that before, and Master Yoda and I have insisted that these memories should help us in considering the danger of the Dark Side but should not guide our future actions."
Qui-Gon felt Obi-Wan's relief at these words and he asked himself if Mace was certain that everyone would be able to separate things like they should. He himself had had problems to do it concerning the knowledge that his former Master had been a Dark Lord in Obi-Wan's former life. However, they had no other choice than to trust in the Council and the Force itself.
Obi-Wan nodded now with determination. "Then let us begin," he said and knelt down. "Qui-Gon?" he asked his former Master to follow him.
Qui-Gon crouched down before him and Obi-Wan placed his hands on the Master's shoulders. Slowly, they sank into the Force, strengthening their connection. Carefully, Qui-Gon opened the bond to the Council while shielding his own mind from the intrusion. Now, everything the Council would be able to see was what Obi-Wan wanted to show them. He felt the other minds reaching out for the connection and calmed himself down to resist the urge to throw them out. He was sure Obi-Wan wouldn't have been able to do that in light of his experiences. It was good that he had taken on his offer to help.
Then the pictures began in a spaceship which Qui-Gon recognized as the ship of the Trade Federation….
Obi-Wan took a deep breath and reacted to Qui-Gon, who was tugging at the bond. He opened his eyes and saw the Councilors' shock at what he had showed them.
/They need a pause./ Qui-Gon projected. /That was quite shocking for them./
/They haven't even seen the half of it, Qui./ Obi-Wan replied with a dry smile. In his memories, Master Yoda had just granted him permission to train Anakin after Qui-Gon had died on Naboo. /If they are shocked now, I don't know how they will react to seeing what follows.../
Qui-Gon smiled back. /Give them time, my Padawan./
"Finished the private conversation you have?" Master Yoda interrupted them with a wink.
Mace seemed to have regained his composure. It didn't surprise Obi-Wan that the Korun-Master wasn't as affected as the others. He had met both Darth Maul and Sidious before.
"So, you're telling us that Palpatine was Supreme Chancellor in your former life? Was he..." He trailed off, too overwhelmed by what his conclusion cold mean.
Obi-Wan nodded. "He was a Sith Lord and he used his position to put his plans into action. Even worse, he became a close friend to my Padawan. It was easy to twist the boy's mind. After he had come to the temple as the 'Chosen one', he didn't find many friends here. I wasn't able to realize that the Supreme Chancellor's influence was dangerous."
Mace nodded with understanding. "So, the fact that Anakin Skywalker grew up here without everyone knowing about his Midichlorian count has already altered the future."
Obi-Wan smiled. "It did. And furthermore, Palpatine isn't Supreme Chancellor. Not to speak of the fact that Qui-Gon lives."
Obi-Wan saw that Master Yoda had heard what he hadn't said. As opposed to everyone else in this room, Obi-Wan was convinced that Palaptine still lived.
"Masters." The Kinght looked around with a question in his eyes. "My memories will be disconcerting, to say the least, from this point. If you want to have this split up, we'll be able to continue this another day." He didn't favor this solution but perhaps Qui-Gon was right and the Council needed more time.
Mace shook his head. "You had to actually live this life, Obi-Wan, we should at least be able to watch it."
Obi-Wan inclined his head and began to sink again into the Force to continue.
This time, Obi-Wan stopped projecting by himself and Qui-Gon looked up with curiosity. He was sure that the Knight had additional information to what they'd just seen.
Obi-Wan swallowed a bit before he began to speak, knowing well that the Councilors had to get over the fact that a full-scale War had begun on Geonosis.
"The Jedi had to fight constantly for the Republic after that. Count Dooku and the Separatists were relentless and we lost many Jedi in this war. It's due to this war that you remarked unknown skills in me." He took a deep breath and Qui-Gon felt that he was going to add something important.
"I didn't realize it at that time, but I am sure today that around this time, my Padawan must have married Senator Amidala. They grew close during their time on Naboo and Tatooine. Anakin lost his mother then and Padme helped him cope with it."
Qui-Gon gasped at that. So, Anakin hadn't confided in his Master when he broke the code like that? That must have been one of the reasons Obi-Wan felt such guilt.
Mace shook his head in thought. "Did the relationship become common knowledge after that?"
"No," Obi-Wan responded and Qui-Gon felt the hurt in his voice. "I realized it in the end, when I was looking for a solution to find Anakin after..." he coughed slightly. "Let's just continue, and you're going to understand. I am sure that Chancellor Palpatine knew about the marriage though."
Qui-Gon was aware of the fact that they were about to enter the hardest part. Had Master Yoda warned the Councilors that they were about to witness their own death? He knew what this knowledge had done to him years ago. But being the Master of the Living Force, he had been able to put his thoughts about an impending death aside. He just hoped that the other Masters were up to it.
He looked toward Obi-Wan and the young man nodded his assent. Once more they sank deep into the Force and Obi-Wan began to project.
Obi-Wan sensed the exhaustion taking hold of him. He had just shown the Council how he had defeated Grievous and how the Clones had turned on him. Before he could continue, it was him this time who needed a pause.
The moment to give additional information was right. The Council had to realize that this had been the end for most of the Jedi order. He inhaled sharply, feeling that the memory was overwhelming him. Before he gave into the urge to sink deeper again to flee the awareness, he sensed Qui-Gon's hand gripping his firmly.
/Obi-Wan, come back!/ The order was oddly comforting. Qui-Gon once more prevented him from being lost in his memories. Reacting instinctively, Obi-Wan opened his eyes, panting heavily. He swayed a bit and felt Qui-Gon steadying him.
"Sorry, Master," he said and held his temples. The headache was overwhelming. "You need to know... It was..." he began to stutter and suddenly he felt another presence at his side. Looking up, he saw Mace kneeling down beside him and lending him his strength.
"If you need to rest..." the Korun-Master began.
Obi-Wan shook his head. "No, I need to finish this." He leaned back where Qui-Gon had moved and took a deep breath.
"The Clones turned on all of us. They must have been programmed to fulfill this order when it's been given by Sidious. I always thought that the Clones had been Dooku's plan to drive the Jedi into a war, but at the end they had been the weapon to destroy us."
Obi-Wan gripped Mace at his arms. "As far as I know, you were the one who tried to fight Sidious then. Anakin must have turned during that fight and you didn't stand a chance against Sidious and the Chosen one. I wasn't able to find any other Jedi after that apart from Master Yoda. A Senator rescued us. He was a dear friend."
He tried to calm himself a bit, fighting the pictures of dead Padawans all over the temple, killed by a lightsaber. "Anakin led the attack on the Jedi temple and when Master Yoda and I finally made it here, we couldn't do anything for our fellow Jedi anymore."
He choked back a sob, the reality of that moment overwhelming him again. "We found evidence that Anakin had turned and Master Yoda sent me to fight him while he was looking for Sidious who had declared himself Emperor by then."
He felt Mace putting a hand on his shoulder and at the same moment he calmed down. The Korun-Master had sent him soothing waves through the Force and only now the Knight began to realize that he had stopped projecting. The truth was so horrible that he had wanted to get it over with. However, he knew that he owed the Council all of his memories. They needed to have them to get a clear picture.
He breathed in and out. "Let's proceed, Mace," he said trying to sound firmly. The Korun-Master nodded his acceptance and returned to his place. Once more, Qui-Gon placed himself in front of Obi-Wan, but not without throwing him a questioning glance.
/I am up to it./ he reassured his former Master over the bond and began projecting again, beginning with his conversation with Senator Amidala.
When Qui-Gon stopped showing memories and came slowly back into reality, the silence in the Council chamber was palpable. With concern, he turned around, but Obi-Wan was sitting there calmly breathing, his eyes still closed. All of this had drained him and Qui-Gon knew that the young man needed his time to deal with it.
He heard Mace coughing slightly and turned again. "Is he alright?" the Korun-Master asked with worry in his voice.
"He is," Qui-Gon responded. "I just think that questions will have to wait for another time. He is exhausted and needs rest."
Mace gave him a nod. "We'll close this session then and come together again tomorrow. I have to ask all of you to remain silent of what you have witnessed today until we have decided how to proceed," he said, looking into the faces of the other Councilors.
Adi was the first to stand up. "I think we all have reason to meditate now, Master Windu."
Qui-Gon was grateful that the other Councilors seemed to take the hint and left the chamber with her. The mood was subdued and all of them seemed to hurry to deal by themselves with what they had seen.
Obi-Wan still had his eyes closed and Qui-Gon saw tears running down his cheeks. Reliving all those memories must have been horrible for him. Yoda and Mace were both watching silently, knowing well that the young man needed time to regain his composure.
Then Obi-Wan looked up into Qui-Gon's eyes. Qui-Gon took a breath at the pain he saw in those eyes but suddenly he saw them shimmering with hope. Qui-Gon felt his own tears at that. The sadness was still there but never had he seen the Knight looking that hopefully until now.
"We changed so much, already," Obi-Wan muttered to himself, as if that realization had just hit him.
Qui-Gon moved to him and took him in his arms. "You did, Padawan. You were the one who changed all those things."
Both of them remained like that for a moment before they stood up and looked to the two Masters, who were watching silently.
Master Yoda nodded thoughtfully. "Not likely to happen these things are, Obi-Wan. But mindful of the Dark side we must remain."
"Go back to your quarters now, Obi-Wan. We're going to talk about everything tomorrow," Mace said and Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan bowed and turned around. Before they had reached the door, however, the Korun-Master spoke up again. "You did well, Obi-Wan, not only today but also every single day since you came back from this horrible life."
Obi-Wan turned around and smiled gratefully. "You don't know what it means to me to hear that from you, Mace," he said and they left the chamber.
Something was happening on Coruscant. Something he wasn't able to grasp. He just felt a distinct disturbance in the Force and he didn't like it. Sidious always liked being in control, but ever since he had met Obi-Wan Kenobi on Naboo three years ago this control was slipping.
He knew that he had to change his plans according to the new circumstances, but now he sensed something crucial happening. It was centered around the Knight again. For a short moment he played with the idea of reaching out over the connection he had with the young man. However, he instantly dismissed it.
Dooku indeed wasn't a puppet like the other apprentices before him and he would react if Sidious didn't keep his side of the bargain. Having this great Jedi Master at his side was more important at the moment. One day he would replace Dooku with Kenobi but until then the Master was a valuable ally. Kenobi wouldn't be turned as easily as Dooku had been.
Dooku already had doubted the Jedi and, above all, the Jedi Council. He always had tempered with the Dark side as far as he had been allowed to. Having been on an undercover mission for three years had made him independent and he was open to Sidious' teachings. There was more to this apprenticeship than Dooku being blackmailed by him with the security of Obi-Wan Kenobi. Surrounded by the possibilities of the Dark side, Dooku would come around eventually and Sidious would be able to do something about Kenobi then.
His only source into the things going on in the core worlds right now was his other apprentice, but he couldn't take the risk to contact him. There shouldn't be any trace of a connection between them. Sidious knew that Kenobi wasn't fooled that easily. He was sure the young man had already realized that neither Dooku nor Sidious had died in the fight. If there was one thing that Kenobi possessed it was the ability to sense every single disturbance in the Force. He had certainly proven that before. Palpatine had been the perfect cover and everyone had been surprised when he had revealed himself on Naboo, everyone except Kenobi. He had known the truth since his Knighting mission on Naboo three years ago. If only Sidious could place a finger on what had given him away.
He had more important things to do now than musing about the Knight and the things happening far away on Coruscant. Dooku was ready for his first mission. Sidious knew that the key was hidden in the prophecy. Dooku had already been looking for it during his undercover mission. Darth Maul had reported that much to Sidious. The new Sith apprentice would continue his search.
Sidious chuckled. Yes, having this new apprentice would make him strong enough to create a new plan, a plan that involved the Chosen One, whoever it was. The day would come when Kenobi would make a mistake and give the secret away.
"Grant him a seat in the Council we should."
Mace inhaled sharply. Master Yoda couldn't really mean that. However, when he looked into the ancient Master's eyes he saw determination.
"Grant him the rank of Master? He is twenty-five, don't you think he is too young for such a responsibility?"
Master Yoda looked up. "Young he is, but not too young. A Master he was and as a Master he behaves now."
Mace wasn't convinced that easily. He imagined the Council's reaction to such a suggestion. He himself didn't feel comfortable with the fact that the young man should be promoted long before he had reached the usual age of a Council Master.
"What makes you say that? We haven't seen much of him since Naboo and he wasn't able to let go then. He saved his former Master at his own expense."
"Not the will of the Force Qui-Gon's death was. Otherwise not succeeded Obi-Wan would have in pulling him back. Proved he has that letting go isn't his problem."
Mace swallowed at that. "I think, I'm lacking some information here," he stated with an indignant expression.
A smile played at the corner of Master Yoda's lips. "Spoken Qui-Gon and Tahl have with me. Leaving the order they wanted."
Mace looked at the Master incredulously. "Why should Qui-Gon even think..." he took a deep breath when realization dawned on him. "Oh, so they want to have a relationship?"
Yoda nodded. "Time it was. Very pleased they were when heard they did, that having it within the order is possible."
Mace felt uncomfortable. He hadn't expected Master Yoda to allow a relationship so soon. However, it was what the Council had decided and there was no reason to refuse them. Both were among the most dedicated Masters within the order.
"I don't get why this has something to do with Obi-Wan and his ability to let go, Master," he replied, careful to avoid sharing his discomfort about the decision concerning attachments. That was something he had to cope with by himself.
"Told me Qui-Gon did that Obi-Wan has encouraged him to leave with Tahl. He did that even if it meant to lose him. Love him he does but selfless it is."
Mace still didn't like the idea that they were accepting these feelings. Nevertheless, the fact that Obi-Wan was ready to continue a life without Qui-Gon there in the temple was a good sign. However, was it reason enough to appoint him into the Council?
Master Yoda seemed to sense his doubts. "Need him we do. Valuable his advice will be for our decisions."
"Then let's see what the other Councilors think of it," Mace responded, not able to find another cause to disagree.
"Grant you the rank of Master, this Council does."
Master Yoda's words needed a little bit time to sink in. Obi-Wan was trying to follow. He had been summoned to discuss his memories, hadn't he? There hadn't been a hint that the Council would promote him. Promote him? Now? He would be one of the youngest Masters ever. Did Master Yoda really say that? Confused, he looked up and saw Mace smiling at him.
"It speaks on your behalf, Obi-Wan, that you are humble enough to question what you've just heard," he said. "Nevertheless, the Council has decided to promote you. You've proved your abilities and there is no reason to keep you in the rank of a Knight."
Obi-Wan's eyes widened. It was true then. He took a deep breath and smiled gratefully toward Master Yoda and Mace. Then he inclined his head. "I am honored by this decision Masters and I promise to do whatever it takes to deserve it."
"Already deserved it you have, not once but twice. An outstanding Master you have been in your former life and proved your rank you have in this one."
Obi-Wan was overwhelmed by this. He never would have thought this possible. The Council he had known wouldn't have made such a decision.
"There is more." He heard Mace saying before he had processed the information. "We want you to join this Council, Obi-Wan."
Now the newly promoted Master inhaled sharply. Mace couldn't mean that. "I… I don't think…" he began to stutter.
"Oh, but we do, Master Kenobi," interfered Master Gallia. "We are going to need your experience and your knowledge to make the right decisions. That's why we want you to be part of this Council."
The use of his new title made Obi-Wan speechless again. Searching for an anchor, he looked to Master Yoda, who smiled knowingly now. "Overwhelming it is, but the truth this is. Need you the Jedi do."
"But Master Yoda, Mace, there isn't even a free place in this Council at the moment," he made a last try to object.
Mace laughed at that. "You won't find a reason to decline, Obi-Wan. The Council has already decided to grant you an additional seat due to the special circumstances." He motioned toward an empty seat at his right side. "Please sit down. We have a lot of things to discuss."
Still overwhelmed, Obi-Wan sat down and realized with surprise that this was exactly the same seat he had occupied in his former life. He smiled at the thoughtful consideration of it. Master Yoda had known that this would be overwhelming enough and had given him the same seat to feel more comfortable. Adi Gallia, who was sitting next to him, gave him an understanding smile and Mace began the Council session.
"We already made a few decisions concerning the future course of the order without having the knowledge of your memories. Let me fill you in. We would appreciate to hear your opinion about it before we make them publicly known."
With astonishment, Obi-Wan listened while Mace explained what the Council had decided concerning attachments. To hear something like that coming from the Korun-Master made it an undeniable reality. When Mace had finished, he looked questioningly toward the young Master and Obi-Wan swallowed briefly. Being here was exceptional enough without them asking his opinion about their former decisions. However, his insecurity disappeared the moment he began to speak.
"Well, it was easy for Darth Sidious to twist Anakin's mind, because the Jedi didn't give him a possibility to confide in them. The Council and I had decided that such feelings didn't take place in a Jedi's life. If he had spoken with me or any other Jedi, he would have been expelled. So, yes, I support this decision. There should be rules though." He paused and looked around. It astonished him that he was met with interested expressions from all the other Councilors. They really had been serious. They wanted his opinion on the matter. "We should teach the Jedi how to cope with the fears which come with having a relationship. The fear of losing a partner can be powerful and we need to deal with that."
He took a deep breath. Sitting here was easier than he had thought. He had returned into the role as Councilor almost naturally. The glances of the others confirmed that.
Mace nodded thoughtfully. "It will be our duty to think about a way how to incorporate this aspect into Jedi education."
"The first request for an exception we already have." Master Yoda said and was met with surprise from the Councilors.
"How can that be?" Master Gallia asked. "We haven't made a public announcement about it yet."
Obi-Wan smiled, knowing well of whom Master Yoda was talking. He suddenly felt relief. Even if he had supported Qui-Gon's decision to leave the order, he had felt uncomfortable with it.
"Masters Qui-Gon Jinn and Tahl have deepened their bond after Qui-Gon had nearly died on Naboo. They have approached Master Yoda with the wish to leave the order to live together." Mace explained, and Obi-wan could tell that his friend was struggling with the new policy. Despite that, the Korun-Master seemed to support it because he stopped only briefly before he continued. "I think, we should grant them permission to have their relationship here. We won't find a more dedicated pair than them."
The others nodded at that and Master Yoda said, "Done it is then. Inform Qui-Gon and Tahl I will. Appoint them new quarters we must."
Mace continued with the session, every time filling Obi-Wan in when needed. They were now discussing the measures that had to be taken because of the Sith.
After a while, Obi-Wan spoke up once more. "Masters, you already made many important decisions. However, I'd like to add another point to consider." Mace nodded for him to continue. "We should start to teach the Jedi a few defense techniques against the Dark side. In my former life, we hadn't been prepared sufficiently. I'd like to change that now."
Adi looked at him and smiled. "Good point, Master Kenobi. And I know just the man to teach these lessons." Obi-Wan gave her a questioning glance.
"Only you could do that, Master Kenobi," she said, laughing at his incomprehension. "I understand that you are way too humble to admit it, but your abilities in fighting the Sith surpass ours. Your experience is a valuable asset in Jedi training. I'd love to talk with you on how to best work that out."
Obi-Wan bowed his head a little bit, grateful for the trust she had in him.
"It's settled then. Obi-Wan and Adi are going to work on that," Mace said.
Obi-Wan was satisfied with this decision. He had considered telling the Council about his suspicion that Darth Sidious wasn't dead. However, it wasn't more than an assumption at the moment, and it wouldn't make a difference now that the Councilors seemed to be willing to take action against the Sith. There would be time to discuss it when he knew more.