As Sheldon's phone rings shortly after they decide they're going to try to fix their broken relationship, he shyly smiles at Amy as he retrieves it out of his pocket and sees that Leonard is calling. They failed to inform their friends that he stayed the night with Amy or that they will not be at the conference today. As he answers, Amy reaches across the table and takes his bowl of Frosted Flakes, pouring the milk on it and taking a bite as Sheldon talks with Leonard. Sheldon decides not to say that those were for him, glad to see Amy eating something. He instead pulls the cinnamon roll to him and picks off a piece as Leonard continues his long diatribe.
"Was this yours?" Amy quietly questions as Sheldon nods.
"Sorry," she apologizes. "I'll go get you another bowl," she quickly decides.
Reaching out, he grabs her hand to stop her, mouthing "no, it's alright," and popping a large piece of cinnamon roll into his mouth.
"I won't be at the conference today. I'm needed elsewhere. If Dr. Gabelhauser wants to fire me because of it, then so be it," Sheldon replies as Leonard raises his concerns. "Yes, I have called the attendance line... no, I am not evading and shirking my duties... Amy asked me to stay... we're... talking," he comes up with at last.
Amy starts choking on her cereal as Sheldon loudly declares, "No, we didn't have coitus!" into the phone. Sheldon looks up seeing her blushing furiously and reaches across the table to lay his hand on top of hers. He looks around the empty cafeteria, he and Amy are the only two in here. Breathing a sigh of relief, Sheldon hands the phone to Amy when Penny requests to speak to her.
As much as he wants to show Amy how much he loves her by being physically intimate, they have a long way to go before that will be a possibility, Sheldon decides.
He picks at the cinnamon roll and fruit cups as Amy continues to talk, only half listening to her side of the conversation. She looks exhausted, and sad, and defeated, he decides. He's exhausted too, wanting nothing more than to go back to the hotel and hold her in his arms as they sleep. The hotel is going to be their safe refuge this weekend, he quickly realizes. Hopefully, he can keep his stupid comments to a minimum and not further upset her.
"I need some time to speak with my family privately, Sheldon," Amy requests as she hands his phone back to him a few minutes later.
"Of course," he immediately agrees.
He teasingly slaps at Amy's hand as she picks at the cinnamon roll and pops a piece into her mouth, grinning at him as he swats the air to the left of her hand.
"I'm sorry I'm being such a pig," she apologizes after swallowing.
"I'm glad to see you eating," he reassures as he pushes the last piece of the cinnamon roll towards her and finishes off the three grapes remaining in the fruit cups. "Did you get enough?" he questions.
"I did, thank you. All of the focus has been on me, but, are you doing alright? We had... a rather tumultuous evening and I'm sure the memories associated with your father's passing... are you okay?"
"I'm alright, Amy," he reassures. The truth is he's terrified about what will happen when Amy needs to return to Paris in a few short days. Will they continue to talk while she's there? Will she decide she needs to continue their no-contact stipulation? Will she meet someone else? Will she realize that he's not worth the heartbreak and tears? Only time will tell. As he prepares to leave her side for awhile, he stands up and wraps his arm around her as she continues to sit, leaning down and brushing a lingering kiss against the crown of her head.
"I'll um... I'll go look at the art collection, but I'm only a text message away if you need me," he whispers.
"Thank you," she whispers as she looks up at him with tears pooling in her eyes.
Mrs. Fowler sees the momentary display of affection as she comes to get a cup of coffee in the cafeteria. God help her daughter the fool, she silently prays as Sheldon leaves Amy's side. Seeing an opening, Mrs. Fowler quickly pays for her coffee and makes her way to Amy's table, sitting in Sheldon's abandoned seat.
Meanwhile, Sheldon wanders the long hallways on the ground level of the hospital, stopping to look at various paintings lining the walls. He spots the gift shop up ahead and decides to go look in order to waste some time until Amy texts that he can come back upstairs. As he enters the shop, he sees a large cooler containing different floral arrangements and plants. Social convention once again. He will need to get one for Mr. Fowler. Sheldon approaches the cooler and is secretly thrilled when he sees a note saying that floral arrangements and balloons are not allowed in the critical care ward. He should get Amy flowers, he decides as he looks at the arrangements. He wishes he knew her favorite. Roses are always a safe choice as are tulips. Amy seems like she'd be the type to prefer sunflowers he decides as he tries to locate some in the case, unsuccessfully. Penny might know, Sheldon realizes as he takes his cell phone from his pocket. As he turns, he spots a display of stuffed animals and goes over to look. Amy could take it back to Paris with her. That's actually preferable, he decides with a smile.
"It's complicated when you've been with someone as long as you were with Sheldon, but sweetheart, what's to stop him from cheating again and again and again? You'll never be able to trust Sheldon again and without trust, there's no relationship," Elizabeth tries to reason with Amy in a family intervention.
"Can we please talk about something else... anything else?" Amy pleads. "I... we're just talking at this point. I don't know if we can work through this, but if I don't try, I'll always wonder 'if only'. I'm still angry. I'm still hurting. We had a heated argument and I was ready to walk out the door, to give up on him, but then... he's been so sweet and supportive and... loving... that I remember all the reasons why I fell in love with him in the first place."
"He's a snake," Rita declares. "He's probably talking to her right now and making plans for the minute you leave for Paris again."
In actuality, Sheldon is waiting in line to make his purchase when he spots a rack of chocolates and goes over to select two bars for him and Amy. She loves dark chocolate and he immediately picks one called "chocolate covered strawberries" while selecting "Caramel-diem" for himself. Satisfied, he places his purchases on the counter just as his phone buzzes with an incoming text message. He pulls out the $50 that Dave gave him earlier in the morning, grabs the items and says, "keep the change. Put it in the Ronald McDonald house donation jar," as he sees that Amy is asking where he's at.
He's texting his response when Amy steps off the elevator near the bench where Sheldon has taken a seat. She throws a penny into the pool of the koi pond as she walks by and goes to sit next to him.
"I got you something," Sheldon shares as he hands the white plastic bag to her.
"You didn't need to do that," she whispers while smiling at him.
"If it makes you smile like that, then I most certainly did," Sheldon decides as Amy opens the bag.
She pulls out the candy bar first with an "ooh" of appreciation. "That sounds really good. I'll have to share it with you later."
He's slightly disappointed he won't be able to kiss her to taste the chocolate on her lips. Quickly dismissing that dangerous thought, he watches Amy pull out the 3 plush daisies from the bag, each containing a yellow smiley face surrounded by either pink, lime green or sky blue petals. She laughs and grins at him as she pulls them out, before leaning over to softly kiss his cheek.
"It's the first time you've brought me flowers and I won't have to throw these ones out," she happily exclaims.
"Any update on your dad?" Sheldon wonders.
"No. I checked with the nurses' station and he's still in surgery," she explains. "My mom is being a real peach right now. I need to keep my distance. This... this is peaceful here with the running water and the bonsai trees... let's just sit here."
"Sure," he agrees as he sets the bag on the side of the bench and wraps his arm around her shoulders, letting her lean into him.
It is peaceful, he has to admit as he listens to the running water of the large fountain which flows into the koi pond. The bonsai trees are neatly trimmed, reminding Sheldon of the trees in the Super Mario Brothers video games. Amy is visibly relaxing as she rests her head on his shoulder and closes her eyes, her arm around his waist in an awkward cuddle. It's more affection than he's really comfortable displaying in public, but she obviously needs it at the present moment and given the fragile state of their relationship, he is not going to push her away. He sits and watches the fish swim, their tales causing a ripple effect as they effortlessly glide in the water. Amy reminds him of the fish in the Nemo movie, 'just keep swimming." He's sure that's how she's gotten through the last few months, just keep swimming, hoping for better days ahead.
"You know I love you, right?" Amy whispers a few minutes later.
"I know. I love you too, Amy," he whispers back as if it's his deepest, darkest secret.
"I'm... so angry with you but I love you... it pisses me off that I love you this much... that I can't just walk away without trying to save us."
"What did you mean by trying to save us? Are we not reconciled?" he questions.
"No. It means... I don't know what it means," she admits with a soft chuckle. "I am a girl who is your friend, but I am not your girlfriend. It's much like we were prior to when I went to the movie with Stuart," she explains to him, "with slightly more physical affection."
"Alright, friends with benefits," Sheldon declares. Amy's jaw drops to the floor as she exclaims, "absolutely not!"
"But I thought you wanted physical intimacy such as this?" he questions.
"That phrase implies we're having coitus however we are not in a romantic relationship," she softly explains. "That's a monstrous ring of fire we'll need to jump through at some point... but I don't know where to begin with that," she admits. "Right now, with every single touch... I see you touching her... and I wonder if you desire her more than me because it certainly feels that way."
"With her, it was lust, plain and simple. There was no love in that. We were using each other for carnal pleasures... but with you... it's different. It's not just sex, Amy. Something happens to me emotionally... mentally... it's making love with you, I realize now. I don't have that desire to call you... "a slut," he whispers, "because I love you too much to degrade you like that. I value what we have more. I love you and desire you more than anyone... but I also respect you... when you kept saying no, Um... I backed down and stopped asking. I assumed you were content with once a year. I used procreation as my cover because I am ashamed to ask you for more frequent intimate relations."
"Why?" she wonders.
"I don't want you to think less of me... for not being able to control myself," he whispers.
"Sheldon... I'd never think that. Feeling wanted and desired by you... I craved that. Instead, you went in the extreme opposite direction and made me feel that once a year was you giving an inch... what's colloquially known as a... pity fuck," she whispers in his ear. "Ideally, how often..."
"Whenever the mood strikes... weekly, monthly... daily if you wish," he offers.
"Hoo," she murmurs under her breath. "I do have one requirement in order for me to continue to work towards reconciling. You must continue weekly therapy sessions. I want you to understand why you did this and I need to be able to have concrete reasons as to what wrong in our relationship. It seems like you partially blame me for not..."
"No," Sheldon immediately reassures. "You're not a mind reader, Amy. It's not your fault. I chose this knowing it was going to hurt you and destroy everything we had together... I..." he pauses, searching for the right words. Not finding them he turns his head in towards her so they're cheek to cheek, hugging her to him. "I'm so sorry. I love you so damn much and I... I chose to hurt you, Amy. I chose this for us. I don't deserve your forgiveness. I don't deserve to be your friend or your... whatever we'd call this stage... I don't deserve you."
"That is the most honest thing he's ever said to you," Mrs. Fowler points out, intruding on their private moment.
"Mom, this is a private conversation," Amy warns as she turns to face her mother.
"You're a real smooth talker, Sheldon. I just hope Amy's smarter than to fall for your snake oil charm."
"Mom, ENOUGH!" Amy yells as the hospital assigned pager in Mrs. Fowler's hand beeps and buzzes. At the same time, they hear, "Code Blue CCU bay 4," over the loudspeaker.
"That's Daddy's room," Amy whispers.