This will be really long - sorry. Firstly, this is the hardest thing I've had to write simply because it's so devastating to imagine this quote anywhere in the realms of Harry Potter, so I hope it's at least realistic, if hard to picture. And I wish I had a chapter or two with Emmeline in it to post before this, but FYI, she is one of the members of the First Order who survives the war and goes onto be in the second Order as well, where she's eventually killed before seventh year. Her husband is a complete OC.

Second, this tiny detail took me forever, so I want to explain it. Marlene's Patronus is, I'm fairly certain, native to North America, so I'll assume that it's possible for that to happen in the universe of Harry Potter and provide these links (sans spaces) for any of you guys from the UK or anywhere else: first, en . wikipedia . org / wiki / Fisher_(animal) is what a fisher is, and, secondly, as they're a sort of younger cousins to wolverines, here's sort of what her Patronus represents: www . linsdomain . com / totems / pages / wolverine . htm. I thought the wolverine sounded too Bellatrix to use that specifically for her Patronus, so settled for an animal that would be fairly similar. Take some of the descriptions with a grain of salt.

Anyway, enjoy! (Although I'm not sure that's possible with this chapter . . .)

He . . . oh, Merlin, he . . . he killed himself last night:

early 1979

-

A silvery black fisher suddenly appears through the doorway to Lily and James' flat, emerging through the wood as easily as if it had been water. "Marlene McKinnon," it yowls, eyes piercing into the couple. "Let me in." The two, busy on the couch attempting to read a book and tickling the bottoms of their wife's feet—Lily to the first, James to the second—are instantly alert.

"Check for intruders," James mutters instinctively as the Patronus dissolves; the cold reality is, yes, this is Marlene's animal, but there's nothing to determine that she's alone or with Order members; nothing that allows them to be certain she's not under the Dark Lord's Imperious.

Lily quickly whispers, "Homino Numerus," pointing her wand at the door; Marlene is, indeed, alone.

They unlatch the door and Marlene hurries in, eyes red rimmed as she slams it behind her harder than usual. Lily's stomach twists as she begins running through people that could be killed, places that could be terrorized; anything to make the Auror so panicked.

"Circes, Lene, what happened?" she asks, gripping James' hand tightly.

"Is the Order okay?" her husband asks gently. "The Aurors at the Ministry?"

"It's Emmy Vance's husband," Marlene tells them, jutting out her slightly trembling jaw.

"Rolen?" Lily gasps, hand flying to her throat. The man had watched his young wife join the Order begrudgingly, vehemently refusing when asked to join. A pureblood six generations back, the war had tested his morals to their core. No one had ever been positive where his loyalties lay, and, as Rolen was Marlene's age but never around, Lily and James had barely met him. They knew Emmeline well, however; she had been a year behind them in Hogwarts, a Ravenclaw prefect while they were Heads. It had been them who had asked, the year she left school, if she wanted to join.

James sucks in a breath and says almost angrily, "Will he be alright, then? Did the Dark Lord get him too?"

Marlene smiles tightly, bitterly. One hand clenches around her wand as she replies, "No. The Dark Lord didn't get him.

"You know—you know that the more Emmy got involved with the Order, the more he stayed away, didn't know what to believe."

A tear strays down the woman's cheek; shocked, Lily remembers that Marlene and Rolen were not only close in age but house mates, and prefects at the same time.

"So what happened?" James asks in his brusque Auror voice.

"He . . . oh Merlin, he . . ." Marlene takes a deep breath and forces horrible words out in a rush of breath. "He killed himself last night."

Lily is suffocating. Outright murder by the Dark Lord's men is one thing; she understands that, how it happens. But someone taking their own life, doing He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named's work for him . . .

James wraps his arm around her waist, and with his other hand grips Marlene's. The three cling to each other, because there's nothing else they can do right now. Emmy is seared into their vision, gentle Emmeline of the corn-silk hair and slightly beaked nose. And Rolen, always content to sit and smile and watch, smiling at his wife, evading questions with soft answers—Rolen, who is monstrously gone.

This internal enemy that took Rolen is something Lily doesn't know. Nor does James, nor even Marlene for all her worldliness—and that's why they stay there, huddled together to save each other.

Huddled together to keep going.