A/N: I managed to find a little time to write so here is a little chapter for you. I have started on the next one already so you shouldn't have long to wait.

Chapter 37

The flight to Aspen was very uneventful. We boarded shortly after Grace and I went over plans for a backyard wedding. It is very hard to plan for a wedding when you aren't even sure there is going to be one. Even though Grace is aware of Christian's current state, she didn't address it with me. I thought that was kind of strange, considering she was willing to ask intimate details about our sex life. But this isn't her first time seeing Christian like this so perhaps that is why she didn't bring it up. And to be honest, I prefer to keep our problems to ourselves anyhow.

Mia could barely sit still the entire flight. She was so excited. Evidently she has good friends in Aspen and already has made plans for her time there. I was exhausted and was only half-listening as she happily chatted non-stop.

Christian's Aspen home is spectacular. The use of natural wood and stonework is a stark contrast to Escala's sharp edges, metal, and white decor. Here, everything is warm, homey, and colorful and it helped me relax for the first time today.

I could tell Taylor was unsure where I should settle in but Gail noticed and brought me to the master bedroom. So now I am sitting in a warm comfortable bed just thinking. I am so tempted to text Christian and give him a piece of my mind. Mrs. Martin, the housekeeper here in Aspen started a fire for me and the flames have captivated me. I have no idea how much time has past but it is late and I should sleep, I just can't. My mind is too busy playing a game of he loves me, he loves me not.

I understand why Christian had a panic attack, I really do. Just as we thought everything was dying down, it starts right back up again. Just like this fire I am watching. What I don't understand is his reaction afterwards. I have always known that Christian is complicated. With his background, that is no surprise. But I haven't really known him to be selfish like this. At least, not when I am concerned. I guess that is why I haven't broken things off with him yet.

I just hope Dr. Flynn has some success soon because I am not going to wait forever. I set my line in the sand already. Five days and not one day longer. I meant every bit of that. I think it is more than generous. Truthfully, I should have said good bye already. I know that, but I am a love sick fool.

The pop of the firewood burning lulls me into a deep sleep. I dream of happier times ahead.

The next morning, I wake up and I can fully appreciate the view out of the window. It was dark when we arrived but I am not surprised by the beauty. The house is set high on a hill and the views of the mountain with the wild flowers are amazing.

I get up and go to the great room downstairs. Gail and Mrs. Martin are chatting up a storm and Taylor is on his phone. They all smile at me. Mia is probably still sleeping, she was so excited when we got here that it probably took her a while to settle in for the night. She was making all kinds of plans yesterday. It isn't her first time here, of course.

"How did you sleep?" Mrs. Martin asks me kindly.

I shrug, "Not bad once I got to sleep. Thank you for the fire. It was very comforting." I offer.

"I will make you another one this evening. What would you like for breakfast?"

I am not really hungry yet. I would much rather explore this house a little and maybe read a book. "Nothing, thank you."

Gail raises an eyebrow, "Christian wouldn't like that very much. You need to eat something dear."

The anger rises in me so fast I can't stop myself. "I don't care what Christian likes and doesn't like. If he wants a say so then he can get his ass here. Until then, I will eat what I want, when I want, even if it is nothing." I yell.

Gail opens and then closes her mouth as she examines me. Taylor gets up to come to Gail's defense. My entire face is burning red and my hands are balled up in a fist. My chest is rising and falling as I try to get my breathing under control. I know that none of this is Gail's fault but I can't help myself. The anger that I managed to surpress yesterday is unrelenting today. I turn around and storm out.

After I spent the morning touring the entire house, I decide it is a beautiful day to go on a hike. I change into a pair of jeans and the boots that Gail thought to pack for me. I took a bottle of water out of the fridge and walked out of the house without telling anyone. Since my outburst this morning, everyone has been giving me a wide berth. Even Mia and she wasn't there for it.

I follow the stream that I could see from the bedroom window up a hill and down a windy path into a valley. The exercise improves my mood and as I walk I envision two different scenarios. One where I leave Christian and one where he gets his shit together and we get married. If I do leave him, moving in with Kate downstairs is a good temporary option, but temporary. I could beg for my job back in New Orleans but I don't know that route. I prefer to work everything out but the longer Christian is gone, the more angry I get. I don't want to marry a baby who reverts back to a spoiled brat whenever he doesn't get his way. I love him, but he has got to fix this.

My stomach growls and I notice that it must be late in the afternoon so I turn around to head back the way I came. Since there is much more climbing involved, it is much more slow going on the return trip. The hike has been good for me, I feel much more in control now that I have had time alone to come up with a plan, at least for the near future. When I reach the stream I know I will see the house once I get to the top of the hill and it motivates me. Who I didn't expect to see when I reached the top is Christian.

Christian is standing outside on his phone, pacing back and forth. I fight the urge to run to him. While on the one hand, I am happy he is here, on the other hand I am pissed off again. He turns and spots me and immediately breaks off into a sprint towards me.

"Ana!" He says as he wraps his arms around me.

I don't wrap my arms around him and he notices. He pulls back and looks at me with hurt in his eyes. There are so many things I want to say, most aren't nice so I hold my tongue and say nothing.

"Where have you been?" he asks cautiously and when I shoot him a look to kill he adds. "Well, I mean you have been hiking, obviously. I didn't think you were into hiking."

"Yeah, well when you need to figure out a plan to leave your fiancé, hiking provides the right mix of solitude, exercise, and soul-searching." I spit out sassily.

He has the nerve to look devastated and while under normal circumstances that would pull out my heart-strings, right now it only feeds the angry beast that took residence inside me. "What did you expect when you threw me to the side yesterday? That I would be sitting here looking pretty until you wanted to pick me back up to play again? Fuck that." I walk away from him, back towards the house.

Christian doesn't follow me. Damn it, I want him to follow me. I want him to fight for me. I want to fight with him.

I leave Christian still frozen to the spot I left him in and enter the house to the smell of home cooking. I am so hungry I could eat a horse. I spot Mrs. Martin, "Mmmm, whatever you are cooking smells so good." I compliment.

"Where have you been?" Taylor bellows at me. He is so angry, veins are popping out of his neck.

I shrug and roll my eyes. "Hiking."

I steel myself for the lecture I am about to have but I could care less about anything he has to say right now. My safety, blah blah blah. It wasn't that long ago that I could walk where I wanted, when I wanted without having to tell anyone. I didn't even go that far. Yes, I know there are kidnapping threats and death threats but seriously, no one knows I am here. I didn't even leave Christian's property line.

"So did he only come because you all lost me?" I ask once Taylor finished blowing his stack.

"You have to promise me, Ana, that you will not leave again without at least telling someone where you are going." Taylor tells me in return, ignoring my question.

"I will not make promises I can not keep, now answer my question. Why is he here?" I demand.

Taylor looks behind me and I know that Christian has finally come back inside. "Because I love you." I hear softly.

I don't turn towards Christian's voice and I watch Taylor and Mrs. Martin both leave the kitchen stealthily. Mrs. Martin must think I am a first class bitch. Every time she has seen me today, after meeting me hours ago, I have been yelling. Even Gail doesn't know what to do with me. She has never seen this side. Luckily for her, I seldom blow up this spectacularly.

"Did you bring Dr. Flynn with you?" I ask, still looking at the wall.

"Are you leaving me Ana?" Christian asks, his voice heavy with emotion.

I sigh as I fight an internal battle. I want to turn around and hug him and promise everything will be okay but that would be a lie, especially if I make this easy on him. If we kiss and make up like nothing happened, he won't think twice about reverting to this the next time something happens. I can't have that. "That is yet to be determined, but it is a possibility." I admit sadly.

"I am so sorry Ana. Can we talk?" Christian begs.

I shrug. "We are talking Christian." I say, somewhat annoyed.

"Can you look at me Ana."

I can't. I can't look at him or I will lose my anger and my resolve and I need both of those right now. "Nope. You really hurt me yesterday Christian. I'm not letting you hurt me like that ever again." I say and walk out of the room, once again leaving Christian standing in place.

As I enter the great room, I see Gail, Taylor, Ms. Martin, and Dr. Flynn all talking in hushed tones. When they notice me, they immediately stop and look at me. I just give them a small smile and continue to the master bedroom. I need to change out of these clothes and take a nice warm bath before supper.

Christian's suitcase is on my bed, not yet unpacked. I shake my head and pick it up and place it outside the door before locking it. I shake my head and laugh to myself. Presumptuous, I scoff. I take my time undressing and running my bath. I pour a little lemongrass bubble bath and step in letting the warmth sooth my aching muscles. I could almost take a nap in here. If I had eaten dinner already, I am sure I would fall asleep.

I change into my pajamas before going to eat. Right now, I only care about being comfortable. I notice Christian's suitcase is no longer next to the door in the hallway where I put it. Mia is in the kitchen eating already. I want to ask where Christian is but I don't. Mrs. Martin serves up a big plate of chicken and dumplings and I thank her.

"Do you want to go to the nightclub with me Ana?" Mia asks as she texts someone.

Mrs. Martin's chicken and dumplings are to die for. Comfort food at it's best. I take another bite before answering Mia. "When? Tonight?"

She nods. "A new place just opened up last week that I want to check out. My friends Blake and Mason are picking me up in an hour."

I haven't been out dancing in a long time. The club scene really isn't my scene but why not. It better than staying here and moping. "Let me just go tell Taylor that I am going." I tell her.

She giggles. "Yeah, you better. You should have seen him when you when on your hike. He really lost his shit thinking he lost you."

"Seriously. I felt like I was suffocating. I needed to sort myself out." I explain.

"You don't have to explain anything to me. I am an expert at ditching my security." Mia laughs.

I do kind of feel guilty for not thinking to at least tell Taylor my plan and causing him all kinds of undue stress earlier. I go to try to find him but stop when I hear loud sobbing. I follow the noise to a little room off of the dining room and I see Sullivan sitting outside.

"Hi Sullivan, have you seen Taylor?" I ask as nicely as I can.

He points to inside the room. "He is in there with the boss."

I reach for the handle but Sullivan shakes his head. "He is with the Doctor. You can't go in there."

I raise an eyebrow at him as I turn the handle anyhow. The sight in front of me was heartbreaking. Christian is crying, hugging a pillow on the floor looking heartbroken.

Dr. Flynn stops midsentence and turns to glare at me. I am not sure if he is glaring because I interrupted a session or because Christian is crying because of me. "Ana."

Christian ignores the fact that I am in the room.

I spot Taylor in the corner. "I am letting you know that I am going to the club with Mia tonight."

"I don't think that is a good idea." Taylor tells me.

I huff. "I wasn't asking. I am telling you that I am going." I raise my eyebrow at him, challenging him.

Taylor lets out a deep breath. "Okay Ana, I'll send Sullivan with you."

Christian lets out a wail and I march over to stand in front of him. "Oh stop it Christian." I tell him, annoyed. "You want to fix this? You won't do it by crying."

Dr. Flynn studies me. "Sit down please Anastasia."