That night was to be the last of us outside the fence. I need sleep very well. Although relief flooded me, a small part of me thought it was too good to be true, though I knew it was not. Jeanine and I had achieved.
But I was angry with her.
I went early to bed, closing the door. I was taking my clothes off when the door creaked, and the person behind asked:
-Tris? You are in?
-I'm.
-The door is closed.
-And it will stay closed.
-Sorry?
-You're not going to sleep with me. That will be your punishment for what you did in front of my mother. -I said to the door.
-You got to be kidding...
I didn't answer.
-Beatrice, open the door!
-No, Jeanine.
-I'm a freaking genius, do you think a door will stop me? I know lockpicking!
-I've filled the lock with newspaper.
I listened as she bent down to look through the keyhole. There was no such hole.
-Stop acting like a child and open the door!
-You better don't sleep with Lynn, she will ask you, maybe. She loves Titanic.
-It was just a little joke -she sighed.
-I'm not your damn trophy! -I yelled her.
"Can you open the door and let me sleep, Tris !?" Cried Uriah the distance from his room.
-I'm not going anywhere, Tris. Please, open the door.
-No.
-Beatrice!
-Go away and create a Opener Serum!
I went to bed and covered my head with the pillow, to stop hearing her. I hoped that she left soon.
- You are angry and for a simple kiss? - she don't left. -It seems like I did something horrible.
-You used me to make fun of my mother.
- I made you feel used? - she whispered. -Oh, Tris, I'm sorry. It was not my intention.
-And then you said "I'll bang you tonight," and you left!
-I said "I will see you tonight!".
-It's the same! You know it!
-I am sorry. Can you open me the door, please?
I stuck my head under the pillow and sighed in frustration. I got up, I took the tweezers with which I filled the lock and removed the newspaper. Then I could open the door. Jeanine became cautious, trying to read if I was angry or not. I went back to bed without a word and watched the wall.
Jeanine sat next to me and was silent, as if waiting for something. Two minutes later, I found out what she expected.
- You could look at me, Beatrice? - Her voice was sweet and calm, and I felt my heart skip a beat. - Please?
At first, I didn't. The anger I felt was still strong enough to resist. But then I imagined her pleading eyes, her hurt at seeing me unanswered. Damn it! I could never resist it. I turned to face her, her expression poured cold water on my anger. Her eyes were sad.
- Sorry - She said softly. - I'm sorry if I hurted you. I have never thought of you as if you were a trophy.
I sighed and nodded, pursing my lips uncomfortably. Part of me still wanted to be angry with her, but the other part wanted to leave it pass.
I imagined how it would be suppress my feelings up to a point I didn't even know what they were. It certainly would need a little practice, and Jeanine had not even had time to practice.
- It's all right. - I said, finally letting flow my feelings - I'm sorry too.
She took my hand and clasped to her - I love you.
My chest became an erupting volcano, seething with emotions like incandescent lava.
- I love you too. - I replied.
And then, in such a short time that not even noticed, our lips were together. Kissing her was like hear a song on the piano.
- I'm sorry, Beatrice. - She said, breathing exasperated way. Her lower lip was red and swollen for a bite my. - I promise never to expose you that way.
- It's all right. - I mutter - Just be a little careful in front of my family, okay?
- Okay.
..
I had a strong feeling of Deja Vù when I saw Jeanine combing her hair in a neat braid.
Of course, now the braid was a little longer. Jeanine combed her hair as if was solving a complicated problem, trying to eliminate any messy hair. I approached her from behind, kissing her cheek.
-You let me?
She hesitated, then handed me the comb. We sat in bed for more comfort, I in my knees and her with legs crossed. The thin blond hair felt like silk on my fingers, and I brushed it slowly but firmly.
- Actually it feels good -Jeanine said.
-Would you like to cut your hair? - I asked.
-For now let's leave it, long ago that I do not have long hair- she said quietly. -Perhaps it is a change for the better.
-I think you look good both ways.
-I would look good even if I was bald -she smiled playfully.
I finished combing her hair. I took off my clothes and Jeanine helped me to dress. This promised to be a good day.
...
Outside there was the clutter known by me: preparations for a long journey
Many of my friends were preparing luggage and putting that to trucks. I saw in the distance Tobias and Nita, preparing boxes.
-I'll be back -I said to Jeanine.
She poked her head out of the papers she was reading (I can not believe that those things have followed her up here) and nodded. I went to my friends. Apparently, they were talking about something very interesting when I arrived.
-Hello - I said. -Nita, we can talk for a moment?
Tobias and Nita exchanged a meaningful look.
- Well... - Tobias clears his throat. - I think I should leave you alone, to talk more comfortably. I'll meet you in the room - he said smilling a bit to Nita.
When Tobias is gone, I find myself alone with Nita. And I have no idea how to start the conversation. Fortunately, she does it in my place.
- Hello Tris
- Hello ... Nita.
- I see that we did a good job, right?
I smile.
- An excellent job.. It's over, Nita. The Center is no longer the way it was. People here will gain a new story, a new purpose. They will learn that human beings are more than just genes. This stupid thing to genetic damage is over.
Her eyes shine like two onyx stones, and I realize that I had never seen her so happy. Nita looks like a girl of nineteen, a nineteen year old girl who she really was.
- That's nice. - she says with relief. - That is really nice.
I thought of telling her that her words were like an understatement, but I decided to go straight to the point make it better for both of us.
- It is exactly why I came to thank you.
Nita frowns.
- Thank me?
- Yeah - I say. - And there is not as if I had no reason for this. When we entered this mission, we had a goal, and we would never have been achieved if you had not shown up.
I remember my distrust of her at first, and how I had accused Tobias have put us at risk trusting her. I feel a shiver when I realize what would have happened without her help.
- I also had a goal, Tris. And I would never have gotten if you had not shown up. That means we're even.
- Good - I reflect - Maybe you're right.
Nita bites her lip and becomes red suddenly. She seems to be reflecting between making or not anything. Then, with a sigh, she simply takes a step forward and hold me.
I freeze at first, surprised by the sudden gesture. But then, as the latter goes, I wrap my arms around her as well.
- Thanks - she whispers in my ear. - Thanks for everything.
We moved away, and she is even redder than before. I believe to be exactly the same.
- We're even, remember? - I say smiling a little.
- Actually, I think we are not completely even. There is something that I still owe you.
I raise an eyebrow at her.
- And what would it be?
She takes a deep breath and shakes hands.
- You... brought Tobias to me.
I start to laugh, and the sound of my own laughter makes me well. I had forgotten the feeling of laugh.
- That's nothing, Nita. It was obvious to anyone.
She bites her lip again. This must be something she does to ward off the embarrassment.
- I know that. Tobias and I are ... walking towards something good. I will return with him to Chicago, you know? I will choose Dauntless with him.
- I'm sure that you will get. You are a bold by nature.
She nods.
- I hope that a lot. And even if I become a factionless is not a bad thing now.
- Yes - I say. - Be a factionless is now just don't belong to any faction, and not be disposed of society as before. And besides, you can still change your faction, or choose two factions, or none. Now the choice is really in our hands.
Nita watches me closely, and I can feel your mind processing all that information, wondering how it would work in practice.
The truth was that I didn't know. The future was big question mark, something we would never know. But it was a richer unknown in hopes than it had been at any time before now.
- You already know what to do? - She asks, as if she had nothing more to say.
- Yeah. - An inevitable smile comes on my face - We'll be in the same city, right? If you want to talk to me when we get back, look me in Erudite headquarters.
For a moment, Nita's face is confused, but soon comes to her understanding.
- Oh, yeah. And this decision has a lot to do with the leader of their faction, I am wrong?
I shrug.
- One of the things I learned after everything I experienced is that there are several reasons why it makes a decision. The decisions taken by love are those that are more likely to be correct.
Nita nods, and I know she understands me perfectly.
- Well - she finally said. - I think I should go now. Tobias is preparing everything to go and I think I should help him.
- Okay, so hurry up. I don't want him to think I'm trying to seduce his girlfriend or something.
Nita laughed and realize her laugh is musical, pleasant to listen to.
- I don't think he thinks that. It's not like you had eyes for anyone but Jeanine. See you, Tris.
- See you, Nita.
She gives me a last grateful look, then turns her back on me, walking down the hall.
I am alone for a moment and reflect on what was the most important part of our mission: people.
People who loved me and had respected my choices, although not understand them. People who had saved from having their stolen memories. The people I had met on the way and that they had more in common with me than I could imagine.
People like Nita.
Finally, take a deep breath, letting the oxygen spread through my system, taking the last remnants of the weight that I was carrying.
I was okay. I was coming home.