EDIT: This is a re-upload, as I have been receiving reports that the new chapter isn't showing.
I have returned!
RWBY Watches Classic Movies
Chapter 36
The inside of the crawler was filled with discarded droids, parts for them and general metal debris. The droids ranged from humanoid types like Ren, to versions of P3-N1 except somewhat less streamlined, to some that simply looked like boxes with legs. They sat around languidly, as if simply waiting to go through whatever motions they had become accustomed to. This is what P3-N1 awoke to. She rolled through the innards until a familiar voice caught her attention.
"P3?" Ren said, walking up to her. "P3-N1, it is you! It is you!" They spent time trying to catch up and compare notes on what had happened since they parted ways as the crawler moved through the night.
"Definitely scavengers." Ruby said with a little disgust.
"What are you complaining about sis?" Yang said, almost groaned, "You used to collect junk parts all the time back when you were building Crescent Rose."
"Yeah, but I paid for all that stuff. From my own allowance. These little creeps are just taking everything and anything they come across."
The next day, a squad of stormtroopers- equipped with what was assumed to be desert gear- were searching the area around the crashed escape pod. A few were riding strange creatures clearly not native to Remnant. Their commander was looking through a strange set of binoculars, scanning the horizon.
"Someone was in the pod." He said, looking at the droids remaining foortprints. "The tracks go off in this direction."
One of his troopers stood up, a piece of metal in hand. "Look, sir, droids."
Inside the crawler, Ren felt their movement cease. "We've stopped. Wake up." He tapped P3 on the head. "Wake up!" he slammed his hand on her dome. the front of the crawler opened to reveal the light of day as the creatures that had taken them filed in and started ordering the droids out. Ren and P3 followed orders, though somewhat under duress. They were lined up in front a small homestead in the desert, consisting of a small clay hut and a couple large holes in the ground.
"And now they're selling them? I officially don't like these guys." Ruby leaned back with a pout.
Penny smiled, glad that her old friend had not changed. She apparently saw the droids on screen the same way she saw Penny, and for that she was grateful.
A man with scraggly black hair and a matching beard walked out of the hut, followed by a girl with red-tipped black hair. She wore light linen clothes consisting of a tunic, breeches and boots. The two met with the leader of the hooded creatures.
"So I'm the main character this time?" Ruby said, perking up.
"Yes, Ms. Rose. As I said before, Mr. Arc can adapt to an impressive number of roles, but it is boring if he is the only one."
"If we go by the logic of literature, that would mean that Ruby and Weiss are the romantic interest of the story." Blake pointed out.
Ruby wrapped an arm around Weiss' shoulder and looked at her with a cocky grin. "Sup?" Weiss chuckled and rolled her eyes before flicking her partner's nose.
"And we shall call them… White Rose!" Nora declared.
"You know what, I was gonna go with Ice Flower, but that is actually way better." Ruby said.
"Okay, let's get this over with." Qrow said. Ruby moved to follow him, but a voice from one of the holes called her.
"Ruby! Ruby!" the girl ran to the lip of the hole and looked down to see a woman standing below. She had tanned skin, short brown hair, light-blue eyes and the beginnings of crow's feet around her eyes. "If that idiot uncle of yours if he gets a translator, make sure it speaks Batchi."
"Ugh, not her again." Weiss said.
"You know her, Weiss-cream?" Yang asked.
"You don't?" Weiss was a bit surprised at this. Cinder grimaced, remembering her and the trick she was a part of well.
"I mean, she does look a bit familiar… Oh fuck me…"
"What?" Blake asked.
"She's dead. Cinder killed her in the Vault under Haven. Or Raven killed her after she opened the Vault." She was dead before Yang arrived, so either option was plausible in her mind.
"Doesn't look like we have much of a choice, but I'll remind him." She replied before walking back over to her uncle, who was already walking down the line of droids. He selected a red and white droid similar to P3, but passed on P3 herself before coming to stand before Ren. "You." He said, getting Ren's attention, "I suppose you're programmed for etiquette and protocol."
"Protocol? Why it's my primary function, sir." Ren said, happy to speak of anything that would keep him from being destroyed. "I am well-versed in all customs-"
"I got no need for a protocol droid." Qrow, moving to walk away before Ren stopped him.
"Of course not, sir, not in an environment such as this. That is why I have been programmed- "
"What I really need is a droid who understands the binary language of moisture vaporators."
"Vaporators? Sir, my first job was programming binary load-lifters, very similar to your vaporators in most respects."
"Can you speak Batchi?"
"Of course I can, sir. It's like a second language to me. I'm as fluent in it as- "
"Yeah, alright, shut up. I'll take him. Ruby!" The creature with Qrow motioned for Ren to move over with the red droid next to P3 as Ruby ran up to him. "Take these two over to the garage, will ya? I want them cleaned up before dinner."
"But I was gonna go to Toshi Station to pick up some power converters." She whined.
"You can waste time with your friends when your chores are done. Now, hop to it."
"Wait, wait, wait. Hold right the fuck up!" Tai said. "Is this a version of Qrow that knows how to act like a responsible adult?"
"Uh, yes?" Summer said hesitantly.
"By all that is holy, PLEASE tell me that someone is recording this!"
"Already on it." Glynda said, holding her scroll in one hand and a thumbs up in the other.
Ruby sighed in defeat, and motioned for the droids to follow her. P3 made to waddle after them, but froze when one of her captors pointed a remote at her and pressed a button. As Ruby and Ren were about to enter the hut, the red droid with them made a small explosion and started smoking.
"Uncle Qrow!" she called.
"Yeah?" he turned as he pulled out a money bag.
"This P3 unit has a bad motivator, look."
"What the hell kind of junk are you trying to push on us?" Qrow said to the leader, who began trying to defend himself (I'm just assuming it's a guy at this point).
"Excuse me, ma'am," Ren said, tapping Ruby's shoulder, "But that P3 unit is in prime condition, a real bargain." He indicated P3-N1.
"Uncle Qrow?"
"Yeah?"
"What about that one?" she pointed at P3.
"What about the green one? We'll take that one."
"I'm sure you'll be pleased with that one, ma'am." Ren said as a pair of the creatures came and took the red droid away, "She really is in first-class condition, I've worked with her before. Here she comes." P3 began rolling up to them, whistling happily that she wasn't being separated from her friend.
"Okay, let's go." Ruby said, leading them inside.
"Now, don't you forget this." Ren warned her. "Why I should stick my neck out for you is really beyond my capacity."
Later, Ruby and the droids were in the garage, which Ruby had converted into something of a workshop for herself. Ren was being lowered into something, while Ruby was looking for tools to use on P3.
"Thank the Maker! This oil bath is going to feel so good!" he said excitedly. "I've got such a bad case of dust contamination, I can barely move."
"It just isn't fair." Ruby complained, talking to herself. "Maybe Cinder's right. I'm never gonna get outta here."
"So I'm here too. Interesting." Cinder said, mulling over her drink. She had managed to convince the Wolf to allow her wine instead of soda, and he acquiesced, providing her with a 12-year-old Mistralian Red.
"Probably as a bully." Emerald half-joked. "Still, at least you managed to get off the giant sand-ball."
"Is there anything I might do to help?" Ren offered.
"No, not unless you can alter time, speed up the harvest or teleport me off this rock."
"I don't think so, ma'am. I'm only a droid, and not very knowledgeable about such things. Not on this planet, anyway. As a matter of fact, I'm not even sure which planet I'm on."
"Well, if there's a bright center to the universe, you're on the planet it's farthest from." Ruby said with a grunt as she worked on P3.
"I see, miss."
"Well, you can call me Ruby."
"I see, Ms. Ruby." Ren corrected himself.
Ruby chuckled. "No, no, just Ruby."
"Oh." Ren was lifted out of the oil bath, allow the liquid to drip off his body. "And I am L-1RN, human-cyborg relations, and this is my counterpart, P3-N1."
"Well, those names won't do. Let's see." She thought hard for a few moments as she cleaned P3, "I'll call you Ren, and you will be Penny. I'll tell ya, Penny," she grunted as she tried to clean one of the panels on her dome, "You got a lot of carbon scoring here, looks like you two have seen a lot of action."
"Naming robots? Yeah, that sounds like your daughter, Summer." Taiyang said, earning him a punch to the shoulder.
"With all we've been through, I'm surprised we're in as good condition we are, what with the rebellion and all."
That caught Ruby's attention. "You know of the rebellion against the Empire?" she asked, her silver eyes practically glowing with excitement.
"That's how we came to be in your service, if you take my meaning, miss." Ren explained.
"Have you been in many battles?"
"Several, I think. Actually, there's not much to tell. I'm merely an interpreter and not much good at telling stories." Ruby slumped at hearing this, and sat down to continue cleaning Penny. "Well, not at making them interesting, anyway."
Ruby had taken a pair of pliers and was trying to extricate something from between two of Penny's plates on her side. "Well, my little friend, you got something jammed in here pretty good. Were you two in a star cruiser or- "Ruby fell backwards as the metal finally came free. As she did, Penny's projector activated and a holographic image of Weiss appeared.
"Help me, Taiyang Xiao Long, you're my only hope." She said before the image fritzed and repeated itself.
"Ah, I love this part."
"Well, this is interesting." Winter said, leaning forward. "Seems that hologram technology is more widespread in this universe."
"No duh, Ice Queen, it's sci-fi." Qrow said, earning him a slap upside the head from Summer. "Ow! What?"
"That's for being a smart-ass." She scolded.
"Who cares about that? I'm in another movie!" Tai said excitedly.
"What's this?" Ruby said, collecting herself. Penny whistled in response.
"What's what?" Ren translated, a little miffed, "What is that?" he indicated the holo-projection. Penny whistled again. "Oh, she says it's nothing ma'am. Merely a malfunction, old data. Pay it no mind."
"Who is she?" Ruby said, sitting up and crossing her legs. "She's beautiful."
"I'm afraid I'm not quite sure. I think she was a passenger on our last voyage, a person of some importance, I believe. Our captain was attached to- "
"Is there any more to this recording?" Ruby interrupted him. Penny answered with more whistling.
"Behave yourself, P3, you're going to get us into trouble. It's okay, you can trust her. She's our new mistress." More whistling. "She's says that she is the property of a Taiyang Xiao Long, a resident of these parts and that it's a private message for him. Quite frankly, ma'am, I don't know what she's talking about. Our last master was Captain Seiben, but with all we've been through, this little P3 unit has become quite eccentric." Penny apparently took offense to that and raspberried at him.
"Taiyang Xiao Long…" Ruby said, thinking aloud, "I wonder if she means Old Ben Long?"
"Excuse me, ma'am, but do you know what she's talking about?"
"Well, I don't know anyone named Taiyang," Ruby said as she stood and walked over to her toolbox, "But Old Ben lives out beyond the Dune Sea. Kind of a strange old hermit." She looked back to the repeating message, "I wonder who she is? Sounds like she's in trouble. I better play back the whole thing." She grabbed a few choice tools and approached Penny in a crouch. Before she could use the tools, Penny whistled at her.
"She says that the restraining bolt has short-circuited her recording system." Ren translated. "She suggests that if you remove the bolt, she could playback the whole recording."
Ruby considered this. "Alright," she shrugged and grabbed a small pry bar from her toolbox, "I guess you're too small to run away if I take this off." She worked it off and the holoimage faded as soon as it came off. "What the hell? Bring her back, playback the entire message." Ruby ordered.
Penny whistled innocently. "What message?" Ren asked, smacking her upside her dome, "The one you've just been playing! The one you're carrying around in your rusty innards."
"Wow, Penny. Even in another reality, you stink at lying." Ruby teased her friend.
"I have to idea what you're talking about." Penny said, crossing her arms in front of herself. She hiccup'd a moment later, a hand shooting up to her mouth as she slowly turned crimson. "Shut up."
"Ruby!" Vernal called from outside.
"Be right there, Aunt Vernal!" Ruby called back.
"I'm sorry ma'am, but she appears to have picked up a slight flutter." Ren said.
"Here," she handed her tools to Ren, "See what you can do with her, I'll be right back."
Penny whistled in concern. "Just you reconsider playing that message for her." Beeping. "No, I don't think she likes you at all." A worried whistle. "No, I don't like you either." Ren turned his back to her.
Ruby walked into the dining room to see her Uncle Qrow already digging in to the meal Vernal had made. She thanked her Aunt and took a seat at the small table.
"You know, I think that P3 unit we bought might have been stolen." She said.
"What makes you say that?" Qrow said.
"How about the fact that you bought them from creepy hooded guys who also tried to push defective goods on you?" Ruby deadpanned.
"I stumbled across a recording while I was cleaning her. She says she belongs to someone called Taiyang Xiao Long." Vernal and Qrow shared a glance at the mention of the name. "I thought she might have meant Old Ben. You know what she's talking about?"
"Mm-mm." Qrow denied.
"Wonder if he's related to Ben."
"That wizard's just a crazy old man." Qrow said firmly, "And tomorrow, I want you to take that P3 unit down to Anchorhead and have its memory erased, and that'll be the end of it. It belongs to us now."
"But what if this 'Taiyang' comes looking for her?" Ruby asked, pouring herself a glass of milk.
"He won't." Qrow assured her. "I don't think he exists anymore. He died about the same time as your mother."
"Oh, for the love of- " Ruby said, facepalming herself, "Really Wolf? More dead parents? Way to stereotype, jerkwad." Yang wasted no time and wrapped her sister in a hug. Weiss and Blake wanted to join, but they knew that Yang was the right person for this. After all, she knew how Ruby felt, having raised her after Summer died.
"He knew my mother?" Ruby asked, hope in her eyes.
"I told you to forget it." Qrow warned. "Your only concern is to prepare those two for tomorrow. In the morning, I want them up on the south ridge working on those condensors."
"Yes, sir." Ruby grumbled, poking at her food. "I think those new droids are gonna work out fine." She said abruptly, her voice suddenly sounding more confident. "In fact, I, uh, I was also thinking about our agreement. About me staying on another season?" Qrow looked up. "And if these new droids do work out, I want to transmit my application to the Academy this year."
"Academy? What kind of Academy I wonder." Glynda said.
"Perhaps something similar to Beacon?" Ozcar offered.
"Is that you Ozpin?"
"Yes. Oscar informed me that the previous movie had ended, so I decided to rejoin you."
"So… care to explain- "
"No."
"But it doesn't- "
"No."
"Do you actually- "
"No!"
"And how did- "
"Not canon."
"Were you two- "
Ozcar grabbed a bag of popcorn and shoved it in her face. "Shut up and watch the movie Glynda."
"You mean the next semester before the harvest?" Qrow was surprised and a little shocked at this.
"Sure, there's more than enough droids."
"Harvest is when I need you the most!" Ruby looked down, knowing exactly where this was going. "It's only one season more. This year, we'll make enough on the harvest that I'll be able to hire some more hands, and then you can go to the Academy next year. You gotta know that I need you here, Ruby."
"What do you think they harvest?" Weiss asked.
"Well, Ms. Schnee, " Glynda said as she removed the last of the popcorn in her hair, "Based off the climate and some of the words I've heard Qrow use, I would wager that they harvest the ambient moisture in the air and sell it in the form of water."
"Is that even possible?" Weiss asked, ignoring how obviously lucrative such a trade could be.
"Maybe. I believe Atlas would be the Kingdom to ask, but I doubt they would put any real effort into it."
"Beg you pardon?" Winter said with an edge.
"She means no insult to Atlas' engineers. I actually see where she is going here." Ozcar chimed in. "It is merely a matter of benefit. If the task were possible, Atlas could most certainly get the job done, but what benefit would they gain? Unlike Vacuo and Menagerie, The Kingdom of Atlas is almost a tundra. They have no lack of water, so why would they bother to create the technology to make more?"
"But it's a whole 'nother year!" she complained.
"Look, it's only one more season." Qrow tried to calm her, but she was having none of it.
"Yeah, that's what you said when Cinder and Neo left." She stood and made to leave.
"Where are you going?" Vernal asked.
"Looks like I'm going nowhere." Ruby said scornfully as she walked out.
Vernal turned to Qrow, who was now holding his head in his hands. "Okay, Bird-boy, what the hell?" she said, "You know how much this means to her, especially since all her friends have already gone."
"I know, I know. But we need her here for now."
"Ruby's just not a farmer, Qrow. She's got too much of her mother in her."
Qrow turned to see Ruby walk out of the compound. "Yeah, that's what I'm afraid of."
"I will choose to take that as a compliment." Ruby said proudly.
Man, is it good to be back! This might actually become a thing moving forward.
Hope you guys had a good couple weeks without we. No withdrawls or anything. I saw Spiderman: Far From Home during my break. to be as spoiler-free as possible, I fucking CALLED IT on the villain. Also found a Xover fic called 'Prim-arc' where Jaune is a reincarnation of the Primarch Sanguinius (Blessed is his Name) and he starts mutating once Pyrrha unlocks his Aura. I'm talking fangs, angel wings, the Red Thirst, everything Blood Angel aside from the Rage. Really good, highly recommend it to my 40k fans.
And speaking of 40k, did you hear that a live-action 40k tv series is in the works? I actually think it could work, especially since Space Marines aren't the protags. No offense, but the Astartes aren't exactly what you'd call 'relatable characters.'
I do hope the Snowbird fans will forgive me, but with the way everything is set up right now, having Winter in the Aunt Beru slot just didn't feel right. Trust me, I wanted to do Snowbird really badly and we will have it at some point. Instead we have here a crack ship inspired by the story 'Guilty Rose' by seraphimnight. Good stuff, check it out. It just felt fun to do, and let's be honest, Owen and Beru are throw-away characters anyway.
Be sure to Follow, Favorite, and Review, and I will catch you later.
Next Update: 7/30/19