Disclaimer: Why should I even say this? You all know it by now! I don't own Harry Potter!
Chapter 35- Slowly Reaching For the End Part 1
At two in the morning Severus woke to high-pitched screams that resonated painfully through his skull. Throwing the covers aside he rolled out of bed and hit the floor at a run; drawing out a feather he threw it at his door, shouting his destination before running through, Seri at his heels. They landed in their son's nursery less than gracefully but managed to gather themselves back together enough to make it to the cot. Harry was huddled in the corner, his eyes wide and fearful; tears leaked from the emerald orbs and stained the ivory skin. Seri took up a position behind the baby while Severus remained in his sights; both called his name and cooed but it was a good five minutes before he focused on them and they were about to touch him.
Finally scooping Harry into his arms Severus held the baby close; Seri gook the child's scarlet quilt with the golden phoenix on it and wrapped her baby in it. In an unspoken agreement the two headed back to the living room; Severus sat before the fire and Seri went to answer the knock at the door. Puffy and red-rimmed Harry's eyes stared up at his father, not allowing him out of his sight for a second. Severus stroked the silky raven hair and hummed a soft tune; he looked up when Albus and Seleyna sat beside him on the couch. Seri went to her husband's other side and took over singing as Severus turned to the others.
It was the Headmaster that actually spoke first. "Nightmares." It was not a question. The Potions Master could only nod and heave a heavy sigh. This was the fourth time Harry had gone through this process and it was no less disconcerting or disturbing each time. Hearing his grandfather's voice Harry glanced at Albus who smiled as warmly as he could, running a hand down the four year old's back. "Did the Dursleys in your dreams hurt you, fire child?" He asked quietly.
The green eyes hooded and the baby gave a small nod, muttering, "Ba Durseys," under his breath. Severus only tightened his hug and buried his face in the soft hair. His own tears fell, soaking the dark head. The boy's eyelids fell closed and his breathing evened out as he fell back to sleep. They hoped it would be dreamless; while there would be no more releasing of memories tonight what they left behind was enough to make the dreams less than peaceful.
Another knock at the door proved to be Draco. Wrapping his black bathrobe tightly around him he sat on the deep green carpet that was now in all the dungeon quarters (with the exception of Sev's potions lab) in front of the fire. With a wane smile he said, "I'm here for Kit and Artemis, we didn't think he was due for another few days for this," He sighed. "I'm afraid I woke most of the Gryffindor Tower with my yells and I told Ron and Hermione that I'd make sure he was all right." His blue eyes grew sorrowful and all together worried as they viewed the four year old. Four, so hard to believe he had aged so quickly. "He will be all right, won't he?"
The adults looked among themselves but did not answer because they didn't know if there was an answer to give. If there was they didn't know about it. "We can only hope," Albus said, "Until we know more I'm afraid that's all we do." He glanced at the two parents. "I will take him tomorrow if you like. He will need constant attention."
Severus sighed. "The kind we can not give will teaching," he said ruefully.
Seri nodded. "And I have that healer's convention that I promised to go to. Thank goodness it's only in Hogsmeade; I will be close at hand if you need me."
"So will we," Seleyna said, "In case any Death Eaters decide to pay a courtesy call."
"Do I get him after classes?" Draco piped in, not wanting to be forgotten. The Headmaster smiled for everyone knew of how protective the blond teenager was of his young cousin. "Perhaps it would be best if you came up and play in my Tower," he recommended. The teenager agreed.
Severus glanced at the clock: three a.m., most definitely time to get back to bed. He bade everyone a goodnight and headed back to his bedroom; Harry would sleep with Seri and him tonight. That meant getting up sooner than the toddler would like and he was bound to be grumpy after such a bad night. He lay down and drew the child to his chest, instinctively the boy curled to him, seeking the warmth and comfort his father provided. Severus was glad to offer it and doubly glad that it was accepted; he feared the day Harry would become eleven and regain his memories of "Snape the evil git of a Potions Master." No one, not even he, could predict what he would do. Hopefully all they had done before that time would negate the negative effects of the memories.
He was startled from his thoughts when the bed dipped and Seri stretched out in front of him, stroking first Harry's raven hair and then his own inky locks. "It will be all right," she whispered, pushing his hair from his eyes, "you will see, it will be all right." He stared deep into her eyes of the deepest emerald, darker than Harry's own. It reminded him of the heart of the Forbidden Forest, deep and mysterious. Harry's were like clear emeralds, bright and piercing. Seri in turn thought that his twinkled like dark stars that saw far and wide beyond what they did.
He kissed her lips and pressed his forehead to hers. "I know but I cannot help but fear," he answered back.
"We all do, Severus, it is hard for us not to; no one knows what tomorrow will bring. All we can do is wish for the best and deal with what life gives us."
Severus sighed and allowed his eyes to close, sleep finally creeping over him. "How did I marry someone so wise," he murmured. Seri chuckled. "Just lucky, I suppose."
"Harry, Harry," was the call that summoned the toddler from his pleasant dreams. Yes, pleasant, never had they been more so. He had been flying through the air like a bird (he really thought he was a bird and a big one at that) and his father and grandfather had been with him (also as birdies, it reminded him of Fawkes).
He was jolted from these thoughts as whiskers brushed against his cheek and a beak ran through his hair. Opening sleepy green eyes he saw the sable fur of Su Lin and the tawny brown feathers of Rowena. With a smile he rubbed his face against the cat and chirped at the falcon. Too early! he said and the bird only chortled in reply.
"It is not too early, Harry," His Papa's voice penetrated through his thoughts. "It's time for breakfast, fire child, and then you'll be going up to see grandpa." The thought of food and his grandfather perked Harry up considerably and he accepted the help off the bed and toddled behind the Potions Master. While liked to be carried and often was he also liked to walk as much as he could. "Very independent," Seri had stated and upon hearing this Harry had nodded, "Vewy inepenet."
Now the boy, with the Veras cat marching smartly at his side and the falcon flying ahead, followed his father to the kitchen. Seri was at the stove, the smell of eggs and sausage greeting them as they entered. She smiled as Severus lifted Harry to his chair and placed a plate and fork before him; the boy liked to feed himself. Rowena went to her perch in the corner of the dining room, her meal of raw meat waiting for her. Hedwig was already at her perch, enjoying the dead mice she had been given. Amanda was already napping, her usual activity after filling her belly, beneath the table, her breathing punctuated by peculiar purr-chirps. Su Lin hopped onto her bench at the end of the table and settled herself into her food. After serving Severus his plate Seri smiled. These were the sorts of days a person lived fore where everyone was content. If only there could be more of these, she thought wistfully.
"Seems someone is still rather tired," Severus commented. She immediately understood what he meant. While Harry had seemed awake before now the energy was drained from him and he slouched in his chair, picking at his food and barely moving his fork at all. Gently tugging it from his grasp (while ignoring the baby glare) she stabbed one of the sausage pieces and held it to his mouth; he refused to open it. "Harry, let Momma feed you this time, you're tired," she cajoled.
He shook his head. "I can feed myself," he stated.
She raised an eyebrow. "Harry, you need to eat and you can't do it yourself."
He stuck out his chin. "Can so, not hungry though."
The other eyebrow went up and she exchanged a look with Severus. Grumpy indeed. "Fine, I'll just put it on the stove; Severus or I can eat it if we're still hungry." She noted the panicked glint in his eyes with a small amount of sadness but he was going to have to learn to one: listen to his parents, two: learn to ask for help, and three: admit his own limitations. He likely wouldn't do any of this till he failed at what he wanted to do many times over. Had she waited a bit longer to offer her help he might not have been so set against accepting it, but then again his stubborn streak was already starting to show itself.
She moved to set the plate on the table but he shook his head and tugged at her sleeve. "Yes, fire child?"
"I hungry now," he said quietly.
"Will you let me feed you then?" she asked.
He nodded and eagerly took in the first bite when it was offered. After that all thoughts of refusing more were forgotten as hunger took over and he consumed everything she gave him.
When he was done he was again falling asleep; Severus stood up, kissed his son's cheek and told him to be good and left. He had a schedule to keep after all. Harry waved good-bye to his father and buried his face in the hollow of his mother's neck. While Su Lin had left with Severus, Hedwig and Rowena waited patiently on Seri and Harry. She smiled at them, dressed her sleepy bundle as well as herself and headed to the Tower. Albus met her at the gargoyle with open arms. She handed over her child and kissed him on the forehead. "I will see you later, Fire Angel," she whispered and earned a drowsy smile and farewell from her child.
Albus stayed at the entrance until she disappeared, looked down and found his grandson fast asleep. Suppressing the urge to sigh happily (so as not to disturb the boy) he headed upstairs and transfigured the couch into a small bed. He carefully placed the boy on it, made sure he would be comfortable, and went about his work.
Harry woke again several hours later and found himself under the warm wing of Fawkes. His slight rustling jostled the bird from his sleep and he craned his neck to look at him, chirping a question. Harry blinked wide green eyes. "Ganpa?" he asked. The bird nodded, grabbed the boy gently in his claws and took off. He flew once around the sitting room (much to the toddler's enjoyment) before heading into the office area. Hidden behind a pile of papers head high was Albus who looked rather tired. Fawkes chirped a warning before dropping the giggling Fire Mage into the Headmaster's lap.
He glared at the smug bird and smiled at the happy child. "Well you're certainly a wonderful distraction," he commented. "Did you sleep well, my chick?"
Harry nodded and began braiding the auburn hairs of his grandfather's beard. Albus let out all of his tension in one big sigh, settling back to watch the boy through half-lidded eyes. It had been a real surprise, the first time his grandson had done this. No one, not even Seri, had expected such hand-eye coordination from one so young, or the want to concentrate so long but Harry stuck to it stubbornly until every last auburn strand was bound. Even if he were dead tired he would negate any efforst to put him down to sleep until he finished. Usually he collapsed against his grandfather after that, out like a light. He had only started a few days before but it seemed more like an eternity. Harry had that effect on those he loved; time slowed to a snail pace to give you more to enjoy the experience.
Feeling a small tug Albus glanced down to find he now sported ten braids of various sizes. Harry hadn't quite grasped the concept of how to make it all the same---or, more likely, he didn't care and wanted them all different! Staring deep into the emerald orbs he found happiness there and smiled. "How about a snack?" At the hesitant nod Albus gathered the child more securely in his arms and gladly left the pile of paperwork. A quick call to the house-elves produced a cup of tea for Albus, a hot chocolate for Harry and biscuits (cookies) for both. Harry accepted the drink with a nearly silent thank you and munched contentedly on a lemon biscuit the Headmaster nearly had to force upon him.
Albus suppressed a frustrated sigh at this behavior. While loving to talk when he was two Harry seemed almost afraid to speak now. If he were sleepy or grumpy one could get him to talk a great deal but at other times it almost wasn't worth the effort. He also did not accept anything (especially food) without suspicion, as though it were going to be taken from him. While all of them had been tempted to yell at him for it they had restrained from doing so, knowing it would be nothing but detrimental.
It was all the Dursleys' fault. Why (and he had asked himself several hundred times already) had he left the child with those horrible people? Had he really gone that senile or was it a temporary brain fart? He snorted; it had to have been a brain fart that lasted for years. He'd had to convince himself year after year as the students went home that Harry was safe at the Dursleys, they would take care of him and no one could harm him. Hah! That was a load of dragon dung if he'd ever heard it. But he hadn't known that then and for him the old phrase "ignorance is bliss" had held true. But his ignorance had inadvertently caused Harry pain that he would be unable to take away. Harry should never have gone through that. It was then that he reaffirmed his vow to never allow the child go through that again.
Releasing a deep sigh to rid himself of unwanted tension (it would not do to have Harry sense those feelings from him) he looked to see the stack of biscuits lower than it had been and a fine spread of crumbs down Harry's shirt. He contained a small grin at the slightly guilty look the child sported. There was no need for it really; Albus had told him to get more when he wanted them but not too many so as not to give him a stomachache.
"Did I take too many?" Harry asked, instantly alert when his grandfather did not immediately say something.
"How many did you have?" Albus asked curiously. He had not counted how many there had been after all.
"Three," The child answered promptly. He took great pride in the fact that he could count and even read a few of the books his family had for him.
Albus smiled. "Three is always a good number so no you did not eat too many. Did you finish your hot chocolate?" The Fire Mage nodded. "Good, then what do you say to going to the Art Station?"
The child agreed immediately and Albus went to change both of their clothes into sets that could get dirty. The 'Art Station' as it had been dubbed was just as the name suggested. There was a low flat table, just high enough that Harry could sit in his chair comfortably at. In the center was a tall stack of parchment, several cups of brightly colored play-dough (that Harry was only allowed to play with under close supervision; they weren't taking any chance of him dropping it into Severus's potions again), watercolor paints, crayons, and pencils. Harry loved the Art Station and drew many pictures of everything, mainly life at Hogwarts.
There were a few though that the family found disturbing. One was a picture of a family (a man, woman, and child) standing prominently in the middle, smiling and happy as they could possibly be. Off to one side in the same picture was another child who was looking at the family and crying. When kit had questioned Harry about it he explained that the people in the middle were the Dursleys and he was the child that was crying. Too shocked to do much else, she asked why he wasn't standing with them. He had looked at her with such serious green eyes (he'd only been three at the time) and stated with absolute calm that he was not allowed because he was not a proper Dursley. Leaving Artemis to tend to his sobbing wife, Draco had scooped up Harry and done everything he could to assure the boy that he would always be accepted in this family.
Another was of the same boy trapped in a dark cupboard under the stairs. Albus had been there for that one, as had Seleyna. The child had cried for hours afterwards, pleading with them to not put him in the cupboard because he promised not to be a bad boy. It had taken some time before they could convince the child that he was not bad and not in trouble. It had been while they were doing this that they discovered another picture beneath that one. It was a crayon drawing of two red spots surrounded completely by black. It did not take a genius to realize that was Voldemort.
Another one, perhaps the most disturbing, was the one Harry was doing now. He would color the entire piece of parchment black; no other color, just black. He had done this several times before and when asked he called it "the dark place." Albus sat his own crayons down, watching as Harry blotted out the last clean section of parchment. Harry sat his crayon aside and stared with intensity no four year-old should have at what he had created. As Albus peered deeper into those bottomless green eyes he realized, with a start, that he was looking at the fifteen year-old Harry, not the four year-old. Almost as soon as this realization came to him the spark was gone and nothing but a frightened little child remained. The tears came as he gathered the child t him. It wasn't nearly as bad as the first time this had happened but it was bad enough. Unbeknownst to both Seleyna entered, cleaned up their mess, and hummed along with Albus in soothing the child's frayed nerves.
When the cries had subsided, Seleyna dried the tear-stained cheeks and kissed the flushed forehead. "How about we have a picnic outside and you can play on the swing Hagrid has for you?" she suggested lightly and the to the grandparents delight the Fire Mage nodded excitedly. Seleyna took charge of getting him changed while Albus gathered together their meal and blanket. The fresh air outside seemed to lift Harry's spirits so that when Albus tickled him his laughter was clear and pure, not tainted with any darkness it might have had inside.
As Harry displayed no immediate signs of hunger, Albus set out the blanket and let Harry wander under their watchful eyes. The Fire Mage, much happier than he had been earlier, began to eagerly explore the area. Now and again he would glance up to see his grandparents and they would smile, nodding their encouragement. Eventually he made his way to the edge of the lake where he found a large patch of mud. Intrigued, he stuck his hands in and giggled at the squishy feeling. At the Dursleys he had been strictly forbidden to play in the mud. If he disobeyed this rule (usually Dudley pushed him in so he would get in trouble), he would find himself with no dinner and sound slap across the face.
"If you're going to be a freak you can at least be a clean one!" his Uncle Vernon had stated while hosing down the squirming Harry. The Fire Mage shivered at the memory and looked back at his grandparents. They seemed unconcerned, instead chatting among themselves. Glancing at the mud in his hand he wondered; maybe he could ask if he could play in the mud, maybe they wouldn't mind!
With that hopeful thought he wandered back to the blanket. Seleyna looked up from her knitting at the approaching youngster. "Yes, Fire Bird?" The raven-haired child shifted from foot to foot nervously, staring at the ground guiltily.
This attracted Albus's attention as well. "Harry?" he asked.
The child stuck out his hands; they were covered in brown clay. "Can I play in da mud?" he asked.
Seleyna covered her mouth to hide a grin as Albus's blue eyes widened in interest. "Did you find a good patch? May I join you?" He asked eagerly.
Even Harry was looking at the man oddly but the silver-haired woman had to admit that her grandson looked awfully cute with his head cocked to the side like a bird. "You wanna play in da mud?" His tone was obviously incredulous. The Headmaster nodded enthusiastically and stood to follow the boy back to the lake. Harry gave a little shrug and toddled off, his grandfather not far behind. Seleyna watched from a distance for a moment before putting her knitting aside and joining them.
Harry gave her a bright smile and went back to making his seven-layer mud cake. He held it up for her to inspect. "That's very good," she cooed in praise. His smile would have done an angel proud. He put it back down on the ground and squashed it flat, rolled it into a ball and went back to creating another masterpiece. Seleyna was making a normal mud-pie while Albus was making a dragon.
She blinked and Harry looked at it curiously. "Dat a dwagon?" Harry asked. The Headmaster nodded happily and waved his hand over the finished model, muttering to himself. The miniature dragon sprang to life; leaping into the air, it spouted 'flames' (in truth only more mud), spraying Albus in the face. Harry giggled in delight and Seleyna fell over laughing at her soul-bonded as the dragon landed on top of Harry's head.
"What's so funny?" a new voice asked.
The fire child looked directly up, toppling the mud dragon from his head to where it splattered back into a goop of mud. "Oops," Harry looked guiltily at his grandfather but the man only smiled.
"That's all right, fire bird, we can make another if you wish." Harry smiled at him, glad the man was not angry , then blushed when his stomach gave a rumble that everyone could hear.
Draco, the one who had startled Harry, chuckled and plucked him from the ground, settling him on his hip. "Well, I see someone's tummy needs filling!" he teased, earning an even deeper blush from the child.
"Draco!" Harry lamented with a small pout; Draco raised an eyebrow. "Yes?" he asked airily as they headed back in the direction of the blanket. Harry tried to maintain his stern air but dissolved into giggles. Albus and Seleyna traded amused glances, following closely behind the two cousins. The blond mage plopped the little mage on the emerald blanket and conjured a wet cloth to wipe away the child's filth.
Harry tried to squirm away. "Draco!" he cried.
Draco continued to clean him, ignoring the plea. "I will not have you eating in such a condition. Now show me your hands."
The little mage hesitated but eventually offered the Earth Mage what he'd been saving. "Wanna mud pie?" Draco, with great reverence, accepted the gift and stared at it with a look of utter concentration crossing the porcelain-skinned face. Harry's mouth was an 'O' as a dark green light surrounded the mud. Albus and Seleyna leaned forward, interest lining their bodies. From deep within the moist, brown earth there was a movement and much to Harry's delight a tiny seedling popped out, unfurling its leaves to catch the sunlight. Smiling at the awe he found on his cousin's face, Draco held it out to him. "Do you want to keep it?"
This earned him a startled but hopeful look. "Can I?"
The Earth Mage, pleased with the progress he was making, nodded readily. "But," he held up a warning finger, "you will have to take care of it. Water it regularly and make certain it gets plenty of sunlight. That way it will grow to be big and strong just like you!" He tapped the boy on the nose, earning more laughter. The child nodded soberly when he had his mirth under control, accepting the plant from Draco. He sat it carefully to the side before allowing his grandfather to finish cleaning him.
"Well, that seems to be done and I do think that someone needs filling up." He peered over his half-moon glasses, his cerulean blue eyes twinkling at his grandson. The little raven-haired boy grinned and climbed into his grandpa's lap, waiting for lunch to begin.
Once lunch was done Draco bid them farewell until later that evening when classes had ended. After running around a bit more and spending sometime in the colorful swing, the group headed back inside. Harry loved the swing, it was one of his favorite activities. Albus had commented about the fact that when Severus had been two it was one of his favorites as well. "They're becoming more like one another every day," Seleyna said.
Albus twinned his fingers with hers, brining them to his lips to kiss. "True, loveling, true."
Now they were back in Albus's Tower, clearing away the furniture to make room for some of the blocks Seri had purchased for Harry. The child loved stacking then crashing through his creations. He did this now and again and as they all knew this was normal behavior for one his age they paid no mind to it. Sometimes Harry would create bizarre things that only seemed to make sense in his mind. That he only understood his work didn't deter the child and he built on. Albus knew that this activity would keep Harry well in hand for an hour at least and decided he had put off his paperwork for far too long and Seleyna went to take a nap, having not felt quite up to speed as of lately. For that matter neither had Albus. He had not mentioned it to any of his staff but ever since Harry had been reborn he found that he became tired much more quickly than usual. His concentration was not nearly as good as it used to be. All of this disturbed him greatly. To his professors he only seemed preoccupied and faintly worried but most associated this with Harry's new state but not all of them were fooled.
Albus, I think you had better take a look at this, Fawkes's amused voice broke into his thoughts.
Pausing, his quill hovering over the parchment, the Light Mage looked up at the bird in annoyance. I hope this is important.
The red phoenix ruffled his feathers, obviously insulted that his master thought he would interrupt him over something trivial. I just thought you might want to see what your grandson has been up to for the better part of two hours.
Automatically, Albus's eyes were drawn to the grandfather clock, startled to find that so much time had passed. 'Goodness, I didn't mean to leave him alone for so long. I hope he hasn't been to bored or felt neglected.' Turning his gaze to where he had left Harry he felt his draw drop.
I thought you would think that, Fawkes chirped smugly, flying from his perch to where Harry was. Acting on its own accord his body rose and walked over to the center of the room, suddenly aware that his room was much smaller than it had been before. Trying to push his jaw up he swallowed difficultly and looked down at his grandson who was still concentrating intently on his work. The red cubic block that was floating-- floating!--in front of the boy's face began to change. First it changed to a royal purple color before compressing in on itself, forming a circle. From there it widened again, a hole forming in the center, now a ring. Harry pointed and the piece flew to its spot and the child smiled in satisfaction.
Noticing he was no longer alone he glanced up and smiled shyly at him. "Do ya like it?"
Albus touched one of the tall towers reverently. "It's beautiful, Harry, I don't know what to say."
The boy, through a feat of wonder, had created Dumbledore manor. The Headmaster had told him a great deal about as the boy continually asked him what it was like there and through all of this he had compiled a composite of the far away home. He had no idea how accurate he was.
Harry hugged the leg and grinned at the man's confusion. "I made it fow you." The child knew how much his grandfather loved his ancestral home but did not get to visit it as much as he liked. He hoped this would easy the pain somewhat.
Albus scooped him up into his arms and squeezed him a tight hug. "Harry, I don't know what we all did to deserve you!"
Severus stretched out on his back on the thick black shag rug before the warm crackling fire. Harry lay on top of him, he ear above the man's heart. Seri was curled up on the couch, clutching a pillow to her chest. Her hair was draped over like a blanket, sound asleep. The Family'd had dinner in the dungeons, enjoying each others' company, and unwinding at the end of the day. Harry clung to his parents as much as possible not wanting them out of his sight. The child got like that at times and Severus couldn't help but oblige him. There was no denying that he too loved the feel of Harry's warm body snug against his. It was solid and reassuring not only to him but Harry as well, he was certain. He let out a deep sigh, briefly wondering if he would ever find a way to make it up to Harry.
"Papa?"
"Hmm?" The sound of Harry's tiny voice brought him from his thoughts; he opened his eyes to find himself under the scrutiny of the serious green gaze. "Yes, childing?"
"Am I a fweak?"
Severus's heart stopped for half a second and his breath caught in his throat. Had the child just asked him what he thought he had asked him? "Who told you that you were a freak?"
Perhaps that had not been the best question to ask him. The fact that he had failed to negate Harry's assumptions meant he took it as confirmation. Harry bowed his head and began to climb off his father but the man brought his arms around the child's body, holding him in place. Severus felt sad as the boy's heartbeat picked up in fright. He ran a soothing hand down his son's back and murmured assurances, trying to soothe away the boy's fright as much as possible.
Harry's body trembled as he fought down his natural response to run. This was his Papa, his savior, the man would not hurt him, he had promised him over and over again. If he couldn't trust his Papa whom could he trust? No one had ever really cared about him before, not before his Papa, this man was the first. Harry really did love Severus with all his heart but he had loved the Dursleys and they had returned that with hate.
Two large hands clasped his face and held him gently, giving him no choice but to look deep within those onyx orbs. Nothing but love and devotion shone deep in those dark icy depths. "Little one, you are not, nor have you ever been a freak; I want you to remember that. You and I, we're very much alike and being magical is nothing to be ashamed of. Please, fire child, tell me who told you that you were a freak."
Happiness spread through the Fire Mage as he felt the sincerity from his father. He knew he could trust this man, he had done nothing to hurt him in all of the time he had spent in his company. He could trust him. "Da Dursleys," he answered quietly, his eyes dimming at the thought of his relatives. They were not nice people.
Severus bit down on his lip to keep himself from cursing aloud in front of his child. Damn those filthy, asinine, inflexible...he shut down that thought; there was no need for Harry to pick up his rage and feel that it was directed towards him. He opened his eyes (when had he squeezed them shut?) to find Harry gazing at him worriedly. The Potions Master tried to smile but failed and Harry buried his face in the man's shoulder, stretching his arms to hug as much as he could. "Don't be sad, Papa, I with you and Mama now."
Severus circled his arms around him again, hugging him as tightly as he dared. "Yes you are, yes you are."
A few days later found Harry up early again. Today, however he was not off to his grandfather's but breakfast in the Great Hall with his father. Seri had left early in the morning for yet another convention so Severus decided to have his son spend the day with him. When picking out clothes that morning, Harry had decided that he wanted to match his father. So now he follwed his father's billowing green robes, giggling to himself. Every now and then he would run before Severus, altering between swooshing and chirping. The Potions Master found it very hard to stifle his laughter at his child's antics.
"Look, Papa, my robe moves like yours!" Harry then imitated one of Severus's most threatening stalks, finally breaking the man's hold over his mirth. The students (and a few of the teachers) looked up in surprise and then in shock as five-year-old Harry Potter-Snape-Dumbledore, in a good imitation of his father, stalked into the Great Hall followed by a near hysterical Severus. A few muttered at the likeness of father and son, teaching him to be a bat early. The rest however found it incredibly cute and giggled at the sight the two made. Colin even snapped a picture with his camera. The flash caught Harry's attention and he suddenly realized that he was under the eyes of the entire Great Hall and ran to his father, hiding behind his robe. Severus finally managed to calm himself and bent down to retrieve his son, settling him on his hip. Harry hid his face in the man's shoulder and put his arms around his neck. Trilling softly the Potions Master turned a fierce scowl on the rest of the hall, warning them to return to their meals. Getting the message they returned to their conversations or food.
The Ice Mage smirked and kissed the child's head before depositing him in a special chair that accommodated for his small stature. Once placed in front of food the child dug in with gusto. Severus had to refrain from snatching the utensils from the boy and instead settled for a stern reprimand. "Harry."
His tone caused the child to halt, put down his fork and swallow what he'd been chewing. "Slower?" he ventured to guess. Severus nodded and Harry returned to his meal, his pace much slower than before.
Smiling in satisfaction the Potions Master turned to his meal and his father caught his eye. "You seem to be handling discipline rather well," Albus commented.
Severus swelled with pride at the praise. "Harry's well-behaved," he lamented. "I don't have to worry so much. He only needs reminding now and then."
Minerva leaned forward. "What do you do if he disobeys you?"
Severus took a sip of milk before answering. "I take away his privileges. The worse he behaves, the more and greater the privilege I take away." It was an unspoken assumption that he would not strike the child. Spank him perhaps but never hit him in anger for no reason whatsoever as Severus's biological parents and Harry's relatives had. If Harry was spanked it would be because he deserved it as it was a last resort.
Even at a slower pace Harry finished before his father and carried on a lively conversation with Professor Flitwick about Charms and math, Harry's new interest. They didn't know exactly how much knowledge the boy retained but they had decided to teach him the basics. When the other professors had heard about this they had volunteered to teach the young one. Math was one of Harry's favorite subjects this week; he found it fascinating that you could add objects (they usually used blocks) and come up with a higher number. The reverse was true with subtraction. Flitwick had told him that the boy was very good at what he did and if he did have problems he would sit for the longest time trying to figure out what he had done wrong. If he became really frustrated Flitwick would give him a hint. Usually after the first or second hint he would realize what he had down wrong and then ask the man to go over it with him, so that he understood better. The Charms Professor had professed astonishment at the child's attention span, as it was much greater than any other young person he had encountered. Flitwick had several children who had children of their own plus various nieces, nephews, great-nieces, and great-nephews and knew children: this child was special. In the same respect he knew not to mention this to Harry but treat him normally; the child hated special attention, his earlier display in front of the students supported this.
Once breakfast ended Severus gathered Harry up and went off toward the dungeons. The Potions Master wanted to get there early and have Harry set up before his students arrived. First this morning were fifth year Gryffindor and Slytherins. Somebody truly hated him, really. While he really didn't mind having his child in his class but with his Slytherins and Gryffindor fifth years he would have to keep an extra eye out to make certain none of the students harmed Harry. Or visa versa.
Placing the small Gryffindor at a desk he put the parchment of problems and blocks in front of him. "This is the work Professor Flitwick left for you, call me if you need me."
Harry nodded solemnly; he always took his work seriously. Severus watched the boy settle down to his task and turned to write the instructions for the class on the board; he needn't worry about the child for now. Fifteen minutes and five problems later students began to file in, talking cheerfully amongst themselves. It was strange, in previous years they would never have dared do such a thing once they crossed the threshold; now that was all different. It was amazing what a family could do to a person, especially a son. Severus suddenly realized that he was smiling at his son while his class was waiting patiently for him to start. He cleared his throat and stood.
"Today you will be brewing the Lavarse Potion; it is a powerful healing agent when it comes to poisons but is usually considered too potent in most cases and is used as a last resort. These," he gestured to the blackboard, "are your instructions." His eyes flickered in amusement when most of the class silently sighed in relief. Apparently not all of them had read the homework he had assigned previously, too bad for them. "However," Most students shifted uncomfortably when a sinister smile crossed their teacher's pale face. "some of these instructions and even the ingredients are incorrect. As I warned you to read about this particular potion carefully I expect many of you to brew it correctly. As such you will not be allowed to use your books." Severus tapped the floor with his cane and the potion texts flew from the students' bags, stacking themselves neatly against the wall. Harry watched this from his table and slapped a hand over his mouth to hide the giggles caused by the students' expressions. They were not looking forward to this. Severus sent a smirk in his direction and ordered the students to get to work.
Half an hour later Harry had finished his math problems and trotted up his father's desk to hand them over. Severus examined the paper carefully, smiling in satisfaction at what he found. "Very good, fire child, I don't see one that is wrong."
Harry grinned in return and turned to look out at the class. "Can I go look?" He asked hopefully, obviously wanting of something to do now that he had finished his work.
Severus nodded his approval. "Be careful and try not to disturb them too much, all right?"
The raven-haired child smiled impishly. " 'k, Papa!"
At first Harry's wandering of the classroom was not noticed by the students or either ignored as they concentrated on their brewing. Growing bored of this listless meandering, the Fire Mage wandered over to his three friends. Ron was struggling to remember how the potion went, Draco was percolating along and Hermione was just putting the finishing touches on hers. Noticing Harry at her feet she reached down and lifted him onto the table. "Hey there, Harry, how are you doing?"
The child smiled at her brightly. "I'm fine, Mione." He then leaned forward conspiratorially and the girl tilted her head to meet him. "I don't think Ron's doing very good with his potion," he whispered in her ear.
Hermione stifled a giggle and peeked over the boy's head to see Ron glaring in frustration at the boiling orange liquid which was supposed to be purple and had to bite her lip. "No, I don't think he is. Should we help him?" Harry nodded and made his way over to sit by his red-haired friend's cauldron; unbeknownst to him Severus was watching him nervously from his desk, ready to rescue his child from an exploding cauldron at any moment.
Ron nearly jumped out of his skin when two small hands grabbed his wrist, preventing him from adding the devil's root. He looked up as Harry shook his head. "Not yet, you gotta put the phoenix tears in first, stir three times for each tear, and then add the root." Ron nodded and did as he was instructed. Under the five-year-old's watchful eye he added the tears, stirring steadily three times, then sprinkled the powdered root over the boiling liquid. He grinned happily when it turned a light shade of violet. "Thanks, Harry; I think I know what to do now." He shook the boy's hand solemnly. "Couldn't have done it without you, mate."
"Oh look, the ickle Gryffindor needed instructions from the baby just to brew a potion right," Parkinson drawled from the Slytherin side of the room, "How pathetic."
Ron began to redden in anger but Draco beat him to speaking. "In case you're forgetting, Parkinson, he is the Potions Master's son and has been raised around potions his entire life as it is." He quirked an eyebrow and sneered down at her work. "Pity you insulted Harry, he might have been willing to help you fix that neon green mess you are trying to pass off as a decent concoction. Crabbe and Goyle could do better blindfolded it seems."
Parkinson snarled in outrage and drew her wand, preparing to curse the blond Gryffindor. "ENOUGH!" Severus roared, causing everyone to freeze. He marched between the two combatants and glared at them both equally. "This will stop at once; I will not have you dueling in my class. If you want to settle this later then do so but for now I don't want to hear anything from either of you, understand?" Draco nodded contritely while the Slytherin girl barely inclined her head at all. Severus straightened. "Put your wand away, Ms. Parkinson, unless you wish for me to confiscate it for the rest of the period. Now get back to work."
Draco immediately went back to brewing, aware that Parkinson glared at his back for a long time after the fact. Harry looked up at Ron solemnly. "I did that, didn't I?"
Ron looked at him askance. "No you didn't and don't think you did! Some people just aren't nice to other people like your mum, dad, and granddad are, they like hurting people. It's best just to avoid these people whenever possible. Now, why don't you go see if Neville could use your help," The two looked over at the magenta smoke coming from their fellow Gryffindor's cauldron. "I really think he needs it." Harry hugged him round the neck and whispered a thank you before ambling off to help the other.
Hermione smiled at her boyfriend. "You just reminded me why I love you so much."
Ron returned the smile with one of his own. "I do try every now and then."
She rolled her eyes and punched his arm, reminding him that he needed to get back to his brewing. Harry talked Neville through the brewing of most of the potion, stopping when he was certain the other could carry on without him. Deciding he liked helping other people Harry sets out to assist those that were struggling. While the Gryffindors accepted him with open arms, the Slytherins reception was mixed at best, hostile at worse. Roughly half the fifth year Slytherins were loyal to Voldemort or neutral while the others were steadfastly on the Light side. Harry was soon able to figure out who was who as he walked among them. If the student growled at him he hurried away; if they ignored him, he told them what they should do before moving on and if they smiled he would climb up beside them and guide them through the perilous path of potion making.
It was the last fifteen minutes of class when Harry came to the last table in the back where a Slytherin girl was bent over her cauldron, her tongue sticking out as she concentrated. Harry levitated himself up to watch as she reached for the powdered dragon scale. "Not yet!" Harry cried and the girl squeaked, nearly dumping the ingredient in the cauldron anyway.
"Harry!" She put a hand over her heart. "Are you trying to give me a heart attack? If so, I say you're doing a good job!"
The boy grinned sheepishly and patted her shoulder as though to reassure her that she was all right. "I'm sorry but you almost made your potion explode and my Papa wouldn't like that and would have given you detention. I don't think you want that."
The girl winced. "No not really. Detention with your father is almost as bad as detention with Filch." Her hand flew to her mouth. "Oh, I'm sorry; I hope I didn't offend you."
Harry merely smirked. "It's true though," he said in a hushed voice, causing the girl to giggle. He leaned back with a smile. "What's your name?"
She blinked dark brown eyes at him. "Meliyana Rolan. I suppose we really haven't met before."
The boy shook his head. "Nope."
Meliyana smiled nonetheless. "Still, I hear you're quite good at potions, which I profess I'm not. Would you be willing to help me?"
Harry grinned. "Sure!"
The rest of the period was the two spent bent over Meliyana's potion, which with Harry's guidance, she was able to salvage and not blow everyone up in the process. She added in the powdered devil's root and sat back with a satisfied smile when it turned a deep purple. "Perfect, I couldn't ask for anything better."
Harry blinked at her innocently. "Perhaps next time you will read the work that Papa gives you."
The girl looked at him, very startled, before stuffing her fist in her mouth to contain her laughter over the boy's very Slytherin comment. "Believe me, I think I've learned my lesson," she finally managed, wiping the tears from her eyes. She bottled her potion and cleaned up her area before reaching in her bag for a bag of Bertie Bott's Every Flavor Beans. "Want one? I'm afraid I'm addicted," she offered and Harry readily accepted, popping one into his mouth.
He smiled, chewing happily. "Bubblegum," he told her and she popped one in her mouth.
She gagged and coughed; Harry patted her on the back as she gasped for air. "Sorry, I got pepper, that's all. I really should pay attention to what they look like."
He nodded in relief and reached in the bag for another, holding it out to her. "Here, try this one, it's all right."
Meliyana accepted the bean and popped into her mouth, sighing when it turn out to be vanilla. "You're right, how did you know?" Her eyebrow arced. "You're not psychic are you? Do you have the Sight that tells you what beans are safe to eat?"
The boy giggled at her silliness and accepted the bean that she held out for him. "Just lucky; grandpa always has me pick them out for him 'cause he's says I pick really good."
The girl nodded her brown head. "He's right though, you do." She glanced up when the bell rang, signaling the end of class. "Well, seems I have to go." She reached out and picked him up, settling the boy on her hip. He wrapped his arms around her neck for better leverage as she took him up to his father, ignoring the scathing looks she was receiving from her fellow housemates. She deposited her bundle on the desk and bowed to the Potions Master who nodded in return.
"Thought you might be missing this, sir, I believed it best to return it to you."
Severus's dark eyes twinkled. "That was very thoughtful of you, and most appreciated."
Meliyana grinned and ruffled the boy's hair when he glared at her. "See ya later, squirt! And be good for your Papa."
Harry could not hold the glare and let it fall to a smile as he waved goodbye to her. He suddenly yelped as he was swept off the desk but giggled when he realized who it was.
"Papa, you scared me!"
Severus nuzzled his son's hair, inhaling the strawberry sent. "I'm sorry, little one, but I couldn't help myself." He sat in his chair and settled Harry in his lap, leaning the boy's back against his chest.
The Fire Mage sighed happily as the warm arms circled him protectively. His father's love swirled around him in a lovely haze and he bathed in it, enjoying any amount that he received. Craning his neck he looked up into his father's peaceful face. "Was I a good boy today?" he wanted to know.
Severus briefly tightened his hold, hugging the boy, and nodded. "You behaved wonderfully, child, I couldn't ask for any more. You also were very kind to the students, helping them out with their work; I'm sure many of them appreciate it. You will make a wonderful teacher one day, my child."
Harry turned to hug him, smile beaming like sunshine. "Only because you a good teacher, Papa. I hope I'm as good as you."
With his head buried in the man's chest Harry completely missed the tears leaking from the corners of his father's eyes. "Thank you, Harry," he whispered before sitting the boy back on the floor. Harry looked up at him curiously but turned when Severus nodded at the door; students were beginning to file in. "What say you be my assistant this period as well, eh?" Severus raised an eyebrow in question and Harry grinned, bouncing up and down.
" 'k, Papa!"
As Harry was such a success as an assistant that first day, Severus decided to bring him back again. The child now spent his morning with his other teachers, learning his regular lessons, lunch with his grandfather and the afternoon with his father. Severus was happy that the child would have more exposure to the subject that was so near to his heart and hoped that he learned to love it to. He needn't worry as Harry took to Potions like a duck takes to water; it seemed only natural. To top it all off he loved helping other people and Severus knew he was seeing that long selfless streak that always caused Harry to sacrifice himself for others.
They had completed the full rotation of students and were back to fifth year Slytherins and Gryffindors. This lesson, as its previous one, made him extremely tense. He knew the students in his house had mixed feelings about him but what made it worse was that most, if not all of the Death Eaters' children were fifth years. The only problem he foresaw from the Gryffindor side of the room was explosions and it was easier to handle those situations; that's what detentions were for.
Sensing his father's discomfort Harry laid his hand on the larger hand and grinned up at him. That grin seemed to erase all of the Ice Mage's doubts, if only for the moment. Shaking his head he hugged the child in a silent thank you, wondering how he knew to do that. The bell rang and students began to enter, watching the Potions Master for signs of his mood. It was common practice in previous years and one that Severus praised in both houses. It had been an instant development in the Slytherins whose greatest instinct was survival. Though the Gryffindors took a bit more time to adjust they learned nonetheless and Severus hoped this rudimentary skill of judgment would serve them in the future.
Once everyone was seated he stood before his chalkboard. "Last lesson we worked on the Lavarse Potion, if you all remember, a powerful healing potion. Today we will continue on that same track and brew Hippocrates's Curse. Can anyone," Hermione raised her hand, "besides Ms. Granger," He smirked as the girl lowered her hand and blushed, "tell me why this potion is named thus?" He could feel Harry bouncing at his feet and surmised the boy knew his answer. Severus had to suppress a smirk. Reading from his Potions books to the boy at night along with their usual stories must be helping.
He returned his attention to the class when Draco raised his hand. "Yes, Mr. Maxwell?"
"Hippocrates was searching for a cure for the disease his wife had and during the testing ended up contracting the same ailment. It was only near the end of his life did he discover this potion but by then it was too late for him to use it. It was though he was 'cursed' not to find it until it was of no use," Draco answered promptly.
Severus made no motion to contain his smile from the class. "Very good, Mr. Maxwell, ten points to Gryffindor. Can anyone tell me what was the ailment Hippocrates's wife suffered and therefore what this potion cures?" A Slytherin raised his hand. "Yes, Mr. Tanner?"
"It was a nerve disorder, sir; that's why those who have been placed under pain curses, such as the Cruciatus, are given this in order to repair the damage."
'Brilliant boy,' thought the Potions Master, 'thank goodness he is on the side of Light.' "Excellent, Mr. Tanner, ten points to Slytherin. Today we will be brewing or," He sneered lightly at them, "attempting to in most cases, Hippocrates's Curse." He tapped the blackboard and instructions scrawled across it. "This is what you'll need and I expect you to begin immediately. If you should have any questions do not hesitate to ask Harry," The class looked down at the boy in astonishment and he smiled back at them confidently, "or myself."
When the Potions Master had taken his seat behind his desk and no one had moved he raised an eyebrow at them and they jumped to fulfill his order. Harry immediately went to Neville, knowing they boy would need his help first.
"Hi, Harry," Neville greeted with relief when the boy levitated himself onto the work table.
"Hi, Neville, are you ready?" The raven-haired boy returned as he situated himself comfortably.
Neville adjusted his glasses, a smile tugging at his lips. "I am now that you're here. Where do we begin?"
The Fire Mage then began to show Neville how to begin the brewing of any potion. Apparently because of his father's former teaching methods the Gryffindor had never learned. Under Harry's direction the boy lined up his ingredients in the order they had to be prepared to be put into the potion and began. After the first few ingredients were added the Fire Mage was certain that Neville could handle it without him (his father would keep a close eye on the boy) and slid to the floor to check on the other students. Ron had to be urged to add an ingredient and Draco warned to wait patiently for a bit longer to put in his. Hermione was doing wonderfully as normal so Harry did not spend much time there. He managed to keep Lavender from catching her hair on fire, likewise with Parvarti's robes. After making his away through the Slytherin section (steadfastly avoiding Parkinson, Nott, and Zambini) he finds him again with Meliyana.
"Well look who it is, Mr. Slytherin-In-Training," The girl teased as Harry settled on the desk.
He gifted her with a glare that made him resemble his father so much the girl had to bite the inside of her cheek to keep from laughing aloud. "I am not a Slytherin...yet," he said coldly but broke out into giggles when she started laughing.
"You are definitely something else," she thought aloud, "So what advice do you have for me this time, I'm sure I can use it?"
His gaze immediately turned serious as he examined her potion, testing its consistency and sniffing the air around it. "You added to much coconut, do you know how to fix that?" he challenged her.
Her face scrunched up in thought then turned to her book to read over the section. "More raven quills?"
Harry beamed at her. "Yep!"
She grinned in return and fixed her mistake. Between the two of them they were able to keep from ruining the potion though it had been a close call at several points, Harry actually having to call ingredients out of her hand to keep her from adding them. This earned him scowls but she bent under his superior knowledge.
"Well I think I can deign this respectable, would you agree?" she asked.
Harry nodded, relieved they had completed the work with no mishaps. He assisted her in the clean up then sat in a chair that she conjured just for him. "Transfiguration is really more my forte and I'm not bad at Charms either," she admitted to him as she dug through her bag. "Now where did I put those---Aha!" Triumphantly she drew the sack of Bertie Bott's beans from within the depths of the messy bag. "Care for one, little Slytherin?"
He huffed at her teasing but accepted the bean nonetheless, chewing thoughtfully. Almost as soon as it hit his stomach, terrible pain began to rip through his body. He doubled over, crying out in agony. Mel turned white as a sheet and screamed when he tumbled from his chair.
"HARRY!"
End of Slowly Reaching For the End Part 1
A/N: Oh gods you should all kill me for that ending but I had to find a place to cut this chapter in half and that seemed like a good place. This will hopefully go up on Friday completely un-beta'ed as my beta and myself are hip-deep in school work. Someone call someone to dig us out!
Thanks for sticking around for so long and as I said before, chapter 36 (now 37) is done and so is the one after it and the epilogue. As soon as I get done with the second half of this we'll have faster updates.
pulls collection tin out of storage and rattles it I'd like to make it back to a thousand if you all can help me out! Please review!