This line is a disclaimer. I have no rights to any of the characters or worlds featured in this story.
Mind Games
Chapter 36: Serendipity
Axel groaned as he walked through the gloomy streets of Twilight Town. Xion had told him Kairi was waiting for him at the clocktower weeks ago and he still hadn't bucked up the courage to show up. In fact, every time he started building his resolve, the little voice in his head talked him out of it. What if Xion was wrong and Kairi wasn't interested in listening or talking things through? Maybe she just wanted to make their separation final. And that thought alone was enough to make Axel want to disappear from the world itself. It was one thing to condemn himself to a life without Kairi, it was another thing for her to speak the words herself. Isa had done that, and he wasn't willing to go through that again.
He came to a hole in the wall around the inner part of town and paused. The opening was large enough to walk through and led into the surrounding forest that Axel was only vaguely familiar with. He shrugged and decided to enter. Anything to prolong his procrastination.
The scenery was calming. The trees around him were so tall the sky appeared to be broken into patches outlined by their branches. As he walked across the dampened ground, he reveled in how he could hear each step he took. As the wind blew through the trees around him, it seemed as though each bristle made its own sound. The place was so quiet it was almost hypnotic. Before he could sink too far into tranquility, his peace was interrupted.
Axel noticed the sound of steps sloshing toward him. He was tempted to hide behind a tree, but then mentally berated himself for the thought. What did he have to hide from? It wasn't like there was a trespassing sign he'd purposefully ignored. He continued the path he'd chosen, which conveniently brought him closer to whoever else was among the trees. As the person's body came into view, Axel sharply inhaled. Only fate would be so cruel to have him run into Sora.
Sora didn't notice him immediately. The brunette seemed preoccupied by his own thoughts as his black boots shuffled across the terrain. There was a look of disgust on his face, and as a whole, he appeared distressed. Axel never knew Sora to be one to look so helpless, but as he'd wondered many times, had he ever truly known the man?
Sora's head lifted and their eyes met. Time seemed to come to a standstill as they looked at each other. Normally, Axel was quick to make retorts or dole out insults, but he could not think of a single one. Even just greeting the guy seemed wrong. What was left to say?
Instead of forming intelligent words, Axel just muttered an, "Uhh…" and hated himself for it. As if the situation wasn't awkward enough.
Sora rubbed the back of his neck. "Yeah," he managed to choke out, "Uhh is right."
Surely, Kairi would appreciate that his first instinct wasn't to pummel Sora into the ground, right? All things considered. Axel shoved his hands in his pockets, also hating that he felt shame as he looked upon the tanned brunette. Serves me right, I guess.
Neither man budged. Axel was certain Sora wanted to flee the scene as much as he did but they both appeared to be stuck to the earth. It looked like there was no escaping a conversation. Oh boy.
"Should I ask what you're doing out here?" Axel questioned uncomfortably.
Sora looked away and chuckled, "I'm just…walking."
"Same."
Silence.
It was hard to believe it could be so silent with Sora standing there. The upbeat brunette he remembered never knew how to shut up. It was jarring to see him looking so meek and awkward. Sora had come out of their last struggle victorious, so why was he acting like he was the one who'd looked stupid?
Axel felt forced to continue speaking, "Should I ask-"
"Kairi's okay," Sora blurted out. His face seemed to redden as he spoke. "She's doing okay…"
Axel was relieved to hear that, but he didn't want Sora to know how he felt; he kept his face as straight as he could. "Good to hear." There was a question weighing on his mind, and the thought was already making him frown. "You see her often?"
Sora nodded. "I do."
He faltered. Sora was seeing her often? Did that mean he'd moved back in? Were they together? Just as the thoughts were threatening to consume him, he shook his head and let out a sigh. It was Kairi's decision who she spoke to and what she did with her time. Axel had no right to inquire about her affairs, especially since they weren't even speaking.
"That's great," he forced out with a grimace. His voice sounded unnatural.
Sora seemed to notice. The man was now fidgeting with his gloves. "Yeah, I'm grateful to her," he muttered as though he didn't want Axel to hear what he said.
Axel let out a long sigh. He knew what he had to say, despite the pain he was sure it would bring. "Look, Sora," he began, "I'm sorry. Things shouldn't have ended that way between us. A day hasn't passed that I haven't regretted my actions."
Sora's eyes widened, almost suspiciously. "You're sorry?"
He forced himself to nod. "I am. I acted like an ass." Axel had never felt squirmier. There was only one other time he'd been so humbled by another man, and that humiliation was enough for a life time. Axel was beyond hate; he loathed this situation. But deep down, he knew it was what Kairi would want and that was motivation enough. If he ever wanted a chance at being back in her life, even as a mere acquaintance, this is what he had to do. Sora was a part of her as much as his own hand was a part of his body.
Sora's face seemed to brighten, though, not by much. "Axel, I was an ass too. I shouldn't have said that stuff about you," he confessed with the weakest of smiles, "I've been a lousy friend."
Axel smirked. Leave it to Sora to equate everything to friendship. "You don't have to go that far," he mused as he stared up into the sky, "We've always been an odd pair, haven't we?"
"Yeah, you're right about that."
Axel chuckled despite himself. His guard dropped as he slipped into his memories. "When we first met, I was trying to set a fire in the waste basket on your floor. And you just grinned and talked me out of it."
Sora chuckled along, "I knew you weren't a bad guy. You were just in a hard place. I didn't expect you to come back the next day and beg for work, though."
Axel shook his head. That moment had been agonizingly out of his character. "Man, I never expected to be so desperate," he lamented, "I was such a schmuck. Something just seemed different about you, I guess."
"Maybe." Sora stepped closer and Axel was surprised he wanted to be within his 'punching' range. "I was truly sorry I could never hire you, but given how things turned out, I think it was for the best." Axel could only nod, even if Sora had intended the comment to be a bit of a jab at him. If Sora had hired him, he would've never had the opportunity to get close to Kairi. And as sappy as it sounded, he wouldn't trade the time they shared together for anything. Not even a chance to get off the blacklist. Sora hesitated then stepped aside, "I've gotta go. Take care, Axel."
Axel watched his retreating form until it disappeared on the other side of the hole in the wall. If someone had told him he was capable of having a civil conversation with Sora, he would've never believed it until now. A small smile found his lips as he continued his walk among the trees. If he was capable of apologizing to Sora, surely, he could face Kairi again.
Ahead of him, the forest seemed to lead to some sort of clearing. He dared to step past the tree line and found himself standing in front of a brick wall with tall, iron gates that had been pushed open slightly. Behind the wall was a large mansion that appeared to be abandoned. Axel raised a brow and dared to step closer. There was a window open on the top left of the building. A pristine, white curtain was blowing in the wind.
Axel gazed through the iron bars and saw that the front lawn was in disrepair. There were broken sculptures and chunks of rock everywhere. He wasn't sure what it was but something about the scene made his hair stand on end. Sora had been walking away from this place, hadn't he?
"What on earth were you doing in a place like this?" Axel muttered under his breath. He was tempted to walk into the mansion and solve the mystery. He knew it'd been strange to encounter someone else on his walk, especially Sora of all people. What had he been doing before they ran into each other? What could possibly be so interesting here?
Axel paused. He was doing it again. He stepped away from the gates and turned back to the forest. There was no point in involving himself where he wasn't needed. Meddling was what got him in trouble in the first place, and he wasn't about to make the same mistake.
Still, he couldn't shake the foreboding feeling he had as he returned to the main part of town. Something wasn't right.
Axel marched toward the clocktower with renewed determination. If Kairi was up there, he was going to face her and give her all the answers she deserved. He'd stopped on the way to grab some coffee, mostly to have something to warm for his hands, but then thought Kairi might like a cup of tea so he bought one for her as well. Xion had made it seem like Kairi would wait up there for hours each day, freezing.
As he walked up the icy cobblestones, he caught sight of something both alarming and humorous. Someone had loaded themselves with cardboard boxes so high they couldn't see where they were going as they tried to walk down the steepest slope in town. The person was skidding slowly across the slippery ground and toward a lamppost. As Axel watched, it became clearer to him they had no idea of the upcoming collision.
As much as it pained him to internally admit, he was going to blame himself if something happened to that careless person. Kairi was going to have to wait a bit longer. Axel glanced around and spotted some guy, and who he presumed was his girlfriend, walking toward him. He hurried over to them and shoved the drinks in their hands. "It's coffee and tea. Got it memorized?" Indicating which was which with his index finger.
Axel didn't bother to explain himself or listen to their thanks. The person with the boxes was beginning to tilt forward at a dangerous angle. He raced across the pavement and managed to catch the topmost package before it fell to the ground. The second also tumbled into his arms as he stopped the stranger from sliding out of control with the force of his body.
"Hey now, hasn't anyone told you not to stack things over your head?" he asked as he properly stacked the boxes in his arms, "Someone could get hurt."
"I was trying to-Axel!"
The yelp startled him. He looked past the load in his arms and was surprised to see Kairi gaping at him. Her hair was tied into a braid that seemed stuck onto the fabric of her coat and her eyes matched the color of the warm hat on her head. His breath seemed to escape him as well as any intelligible phrase he could say to her. Kairi, in the flesh, was more stunning than any memory he could conjure.
"Hey…" he nearly whispered, "I didn't know you were-"
"Thank you!"
Axel nearly staggered backward. She was thanking him? Not snatching her things from him and telling him off? His shoulders dropped a bit. "You're welcome," he found himself replying. He glanced around the sidewalk, people were going about their day as though nothing strange was happening right next to them. Well, perhaps it wasn't that strange. They were just two people talking. Axel wished the moment felt as ordinary as it looked.
"Do you want me to carry these for you?" he offered with a nervous chuckle.
Kairi nodded, strangely calm about the chance meeting. "Would you, please? They're light but you're right…I should've left room to see. I was too eager to finish," she explained as she shifted the weight of what remained in her arms, "You can follow me. It's just in this doorway."
Axel followed her into an open door that was at the bottom of the incline. The entranceway was dark and only contained a black staircase. Kairi led him to the third landing and shoved a key into the lone door. Hesitantly, he walked inside and saw there were more boxes in what looked to be an empty apartment. His breath hitched as the realization struck him; she'd moved out of the townhome.
"You can set them there," she instructed as she placed hers on the kitchen counter. He did as she said, unable to take his eyes off her. Kairi seemed oblivious to his attention as she ripped off her hat and wiped the sweat from her hairline. He wondered how long she'd been moving.
She finally caught his gaze and froze where she was standing. Axel blanched; she was probably waiting for him to leave. "Well, I'll get out of the way then-"
"Axel, wait!" came her pleading voice. She rushed over to him and grabbed his arm before he could even turn away. The feeling of her gloved hand on his sleeve made him flinch and it didn't go unnoticed. She immediately released him and took a step back. "Sorry, I shouldn't have…" Her eyes were searching his. For what, he had no idea.
"No worries," he sputtered out. He glanced around the apartment, trying to find something else to look at besides the woman making him sound like an idiot. Axel had rehearsed so many speeches for when he saw her again but they all failed him now. There was nothing he could say to make up for what happened. There was nothing he could promise her that would make it better.
The silence that hung over them was thicker than the one he'd shared with Sora. It permeated the air with tension and uncertainty. Axel was sure if he remained next to her much longer it would strangle him.
"Axel, I've been looking for you," she finally confessed, "I wanted to talk to you about what happened."
"I know," Axel hesitated with a rub of his neck, "Xion told me you were waiting for me on the clocktower."
"Then why didn't you-?" She frowned and shook her head. "No, it's okay. You don't have to explain yourself if you don't want to."
She was giving him an out. All he had to do was take it and walk out of the door. He studied her face. Her pink lips were trembling as though she wanted to say so much more. He let out his second, deep sigh of the day and cracked a smile. "No, Kairi. I want to explain myself," he admitted, "It just took me a while to be ready. But before we jump into that, do you have more things you're moving in here?"
Kairi seemed to falter; Axel's breath hitched. He began prepping his row of apologies only to have them fall apart when she smiled. It was a real smile and his heart hummed in his chest from the sight of it. He never thought she'd smile at him like that again. "Okay, you can help me. There's a few more things in my car. I can show you where I parked."
Axel followed her back onto the street as though he was floating through a dream. Was he really in the same place as Kairi again? And was it really okay? She led him to her car she'd parked on the side of the street a few blocks away. The boxes that remained were much smaller than what she'd been carrying earlier so Axel was able to grab them all for her.
"Are you sure?" Kairi asked as they made their way back to the building, "I can take something from you."
He shook his head. "Nah, I'm happy to do this, prin-" He nearly coughed on the word. "I mean, Kairi. Sorry about that."
"It's okay…" There was a strain in her voice. Axel inwardly groaned. He'd gotten comfortable too quickly again. When was he going to learn? He stepped aside to let her into the building first then walked up the staircase, cursing himself the entire way.
A/N: I was going to post this yesterday but it was a rough day for me so I apologize. I'm happy to announce I've reached the final editing stage for this fic so it will be completed fairly soon. It's just a matter of making sure my updates are on time again. Thank you all for sticking with me. I'd love to know what you thought or what your predictions are as always. Please leave me a review and let me in on your thoughts.