Chapter 35-The Bonds of Trust
Sunlight streamed into the meadow where Raxmon and Grien had spent the night and the human had slept under the wing of his partner. Grien, overnight, had become a dragon rider. Never would he have imagined it nor would he have expected that fate would smile so kindly upon him. Golden rays from the sun struck Raxmon's body and wings as his entire surface lit up with a golden glow which awoke Grien. Moaning as he felt where Raxmon's hard scales had rubbed against him all night, he blinked and gripped down onto the dragon's eldunari by mistake.
A shriek of pure agony tore through Grien's mind and he jerked his hand away from the gem which allowed him to have contact with Raxmon even if they were halfway across Alagaesia from each other.
Touching the eldunari again, but softer this time, Grien rubbed its golden surface slowly as he awaited another mental shriek from Raxmon. He had heard from Raxmon during their lengthy talk last night after they had become one that the male had a unique ability known as precognition. This gift allowed for the golden beast to see the future through dreams, some of which unpleasant.
No shriek echoed out him and he felt nothing that would signal pain ripple through the eldunari to his hand as seconds became minutes. Apparently Raxmon had calmed himself down some, or at least drifted to another dream.
Lifting his hand and pressing it against the cool membrane of the dragon's wing, Grien smiled to himself. Raxmon needed this rest after his fight with Shruikan but the urge to find his mate had also impacted the human that was his bonded partner now. Narssia, if Grien was certain of Raxmon's feelings towards her, was probably rather angry over this discovery of the death of Shruikan by Raxmon himself.
I assume you request that I lift my wing, correct?
The clear, crisp voice of Raxmon echoed out to Grien. He didn't need the dragon's eldunari to understand his partner even if he wasn't comfortable with his new found mental skills.
"I would but if you'd prefer to sleep more than I have no objection with waiting," Grien answered politely out loud as Raxmon lifted his wing out of sheer habit.
To wait much longer would ensue the possibility that Narssia has already left to return to Uru'baen and inform Galbatorix of the death of Shruikan, Raxmon commented as his tone held a faint layer of sadness to it that caught Grien off-guard.
"What are suggesting?" The human asked as he placed his right hand on Raxmon's underbelly as he raised up to rest on his knees. "That she has already chosen a course of action you have not seen?"
Not quite, Grien. If she knows of the death of Shruikan then I suspect that she has already begun her return to the capital of the Empire. Again, Raxmon's voice reflected a hint of sadness to it as he lifted his head and raised his snout to the sky.
Raxmon staggered to his feet a moment later, using his free legs to lift himself up to where he could use the other two to stabilize himself. He lowered his head and rested it against his chest as Grien stood up.
What we spoke of last night, remember it always. Our time spent together should give you much to think on.
The dragon lifted his head up after he had finished and stared at his partner with a single green eye. There was no emotion in his expression, no hint of what he felt deep inside.
"We will be honest with each other, right?" Grien questioned as he gazed back at Raxmon.
Indeed. Raxmon snorted, letting loose a plume of black smoke which rose into the air. Why question this?
"It's just . . . I want to know how we will be received should we return to the Varden soon. I'm not sure that this will aid our attempts to take down the Empire."
Reaching out, Raxmon rubbed against Grien as the human stroked the underside of his jaw. Of little faith are we? Fear not, our arrival has been taken care of already.
"But how . . . ?"
Raxmon snorted once more, fanning out his wings as Grien retreated a step. Bellowing loudly, the golden dragon lifted his snout to the sky and let loose a blazing stream of golden fire.
Grien was still nervous about this. Raxmon was a young dragon, young by how old he had learned they could live, and any display of the fire that his partner could produce reminded him of this fact. At any time Raxmon could loose control and turn that fire against him.
Your eyes suggest that you are afraid of something, yet I know not what it is. Tell me, please.
Grien blinked, his gaze focusing on Raxmon as the male had lowered his head and had stopped his display of fire. The look in his eyes suggested that he was concerned for Grien and the human smiled softly at realizing that.
"I'm fine." Raxmon growled, unapprovingly. Grien sighed and finally muttered, "It's just I get nervous around your fire. To me, you are still young from what you told me of dragons living to be hundreds of thousands of years old. I know that you'd never turn your fire on me but I can't shake that fear."
Ah. Raxmon nodded, sympathy echoing across to Grien through their mental link. I understand but there will be times where I must use my flames. I'm sure we can work through this, dragon rider.
"Stop using that term," Grien grumbled.
Stop speaking only with your voice and use your mind. Once you do then I will be more than willing to stop referring to you as my rider constantly, Raxmon remarked, growling softly at the end to make sure his conditions stuck with his partner.
I think you will find this acceptable, correct? Grien's voice trembled as he spoke out with his thoughts, unnerved about doing this.
I am pleased, my partner. Raxmon couldn't help but hum in acknowledgment at Grien's truth in holding to his words. There was no finer dragon to be the rider of, or at least he thought that.
Folding in his wings against his body, Raxmon lowered himself to the ground and motioned for Grien to climb on. The time had come then. They would return to the Varden, something Grien was still unsure of. He trusted Raxmon but the dragon couldn't be right all the time, could he?
Fear not, Grien, we will be received well. Raxmon seemed to have heard his thoughts but knowing the dragon it was possible he had listened in. Were it not so I would have told you already.
That calmed Grien some but he was still nervous about the return. Ignoring his anxiety for now, the new rider climbed onto the back of his dragon and Raxmon stood up, fanning out the two glistening golden membranes that were the beast's wings.
Springing into the air, Raxmon flapped his wings only twice before evening out. This still, even as he was trying to be careful, resulted in Grien leaning over his left side. Tasting bile in the back of his throat as he forced himself to face straight ahead after he wiped at his mouth with the back of his hand, the human pressed his shaky, clenched fists to Raxmon's scaled back as the eldunari rested between Grien's legs.
You okay? Raxmon's concern caught Grien off guard once more.
Baring himself as he was still coming back together after being launched into the air with no warning from his dragon, Grien waited a moment before replying.
I've been better, he confessed, his eyes on a batch of Raxmon's golden scales that lay right behind his horns. Warn me next time, okay?
I make no promises on that, Raxmon snorted. There might be times where I must fly immediately and you, even if it sounds harsh, must get used to it.
Grien moaned softly as he leaned against Raxmon's warm scales, folding his arms over his stomach. He wasn't afraid of heights yet there had been something about being launched into the air without any warning that had made him sick. Raxmon chuckled softly, unable to control himself, and Grien closed his eyes, not willing to use more of his fading energy to snap back at his dragon.
Dropping into a slow descent, Raxmon fanned his wings out to their fullest and glanced back at his rider with a green orb. I can't do much for you but know that we will get through this, together.
You say that, Grien muttered weakly, yet what good does it do for you. I don't want to see you restricted from being what you are because of me . . . Perhaps we shouldn't have become bonded.
Don't say that! I believe that we made the right choice in this decision, no matter what anyone else says. Raxmon hummed pleasantly in the back of his throat.
Grien sighed, breathing easier now as he could see the land closer to them then it had been from several feet in the sky looking down. Just land.
Of course.
The dim acknowledgment of Raxmon was hardly heard by Grien as the golden dragon suddenly spun sharply to the left, his wings fluttering as he sought to recapture his balance. His mind reeling from the shock, Grien snapped his eyes shut as he could taste the horridness of his own vomit in the back of his throat once more. He wouldn't lose control again, he'd keep it back . . .
Raxmon flipped once more, harder this time as he forced himself upward with several strong flaps of his wings. Grien swallowed more feverishly, trying to keep his body's own reaction to Raxmon's movement held under his grasp. It didn't work.
Heaving once more over Raxmon's golden scales, Grien pressed his face against the golden, glistening scales of his dragon as Raxmon leveled out for a moment, concern for his rider clearly felt by Grien even in his weakened state.
I'm fine, he croaked out mentally, feeling drained even by the effort. Don't worry about me, protect yourself.
Raxmon growled uneasily and drew himself up, his eyes searching for the blur of blue that he knew was Saphira as she, and the rest of the Varden, knew nothing of his bonding to Grien. It was his new partner who she was after; her natural curiosity drove her to try and get Raxmon to open his mind to her about the details and who it was that was now his rider.
Saphira! He roared, breaking the silence as Grien rested against his back, the human's eyes still tightly shut. Leave me be and return to your rider.
Why won't you let me see the one who you have bonded to Raxmon? Is it because you're scared or is it something more?
Grien stretched out his clammy hands, the underside of which were now bleeding and raw from rubbing against Raxmon's diamond-hard scales. Straining himself to be heard by his dragon, Grien reached out to Raxmon as powerfully as he could in his weakened state.
Let her in, she deserves to know.
No she doesn't, Raxmon snapped back, a little too harshly. That information is my own right, not for her knowledge.
It's only me, Grien reminded his partner. Why be so secretive?
Raxmon was slower than normal with his response. Because she can use this to aid the Empire if she is captured and brought before Galbatorix.
Like Narssia?
Like Narssia, Raxmon agreed softly, his tone filled with sorrow.
In that instant, Saphira burst into view. Her vibrant blue scales glistened as her azure eyes glared like daggers at Raxmon. Of course, Grien knew it was him she was focusing on but for the moment he was concealed behind Raxmon's muscular chest and broad shoulders.
Sighing, Raxmon finally broke the silence around them and his silence to his rider. Saphira, my rider is Grien.
The blue dragoness drew back with a snarl, as if she had been struck by a physical attack from him. How? Why?
Because it is my choice, dragoness. The steel tone in Raxmon's voice reminded Grien that his dragon could do far more than just talk angrily, he could act with force as well.
I see. You chose him and I respect that. Might I see him?
Raxmon snorted, unsure of what to do until Grien gave his own permission to go ahead and be seen. Turning, so that his left wing nearly touched Saphira's shoulder, Raxmon allowed the female sapphire dragon to see his bonded partner.
After what seemed like a lifetime, Saphira sighed and lowered her head. I accept your choice, Raxmon. Should you like I . . .
No! The savagery of Raxmon's roar was unmistakable to Grien as the sheer force of the dragon's roar, coupled with the fact that Raxmon spun so fast back around that he nearly threw up again, threatened to knock him off. I will see to it that he is trained in the ways of a rider, of that you can be sure. He will not be taken to Eragon by yourself.
Then what is your idea on his training then if you are not going to bring him to the only rider the Varden have? Saphira growled softly, her eyes holding back shimmering anger but not well enough to the point that even Raxmon couldn't see it.
I will take him to your rider myself, Raxmon spat back, snarling as he narrowed his olive eyes. Be lucky I am weak or there would be a fight brewing between us.
With less than another word to Saphira, Raxmon flapped his wings and angled his way toward the Varden. Grien stirred slowly and the golden dragon hummed in pleasure.
Grien, relax and enjoy the remainder of our flight. I will not execute anymore risky flight maneuvers, of that you can be certain.
You've been known to break promises Raxmon, his rider informed with little satisfaction at getting the better of him.
I have. Raxmon's admittance of this fact surprised Grien but didn't cause him to go any deeper into their conversation as the golden beast flared his wings and dropped to the ground.
Grien dug his bleeding hands into Raxmon's scales as the dragon lowered himself to the ground. With a grunt of pain, the human shoved himself off Raxmon as the beast watched in concern. Striking the ground painfully, Grien yelped in pain as it hurt to even move his legs.
Raxmon growled softly, realizing what had occurred. He lowered his head and stood back up, sighing as Grien cringed once more in anguish. The human's ragged screams reached him as Grien tried once more to stand and caused further damage to the inside of his legs which had been stripped of skin during their flight.
I'm sorry, Raxmon whispered as he gazed over at his struggling partner as he turned so that he could easily see Grien. I'm so sorry.
Grien, had he not been in as much pain as he was, would have answered with a calm remark. Instead, and to Raxmon's own surprise, he snapped out at his dragon with such a tone that even made Raxmon retreat several steps.
Sorry? How can you be sorry? I could force myself far harder into your head but it would not even been to equal the agony I'm going through. I thought we were partners, Raxmon!
We are, the golden dragon growled desperately, but I . . .
Don't say it. There is no way you can be sorry. Clutching the moist and raw inside of his right leg as the black material that had been protecting it had been torn clean off, Grien eyed his bonded partner with such anger that made Raxmon think of Narssia and her own fury. Do you see what you've done to me? Do you?
I can't say that I'm . . .
Grien hissed with his teeth clenched as he took his hand away and stared at the free blood which had collected on the raw flesh on the inside of his hands. His hands and the insides of his legs were mangled because of Raxmon. That dragon had dealt his own pain out to Grien by what he had done.
. . . sorry enough to ease your pain, Raxmon concluded as he noticed that Grien had not stopped him from speaking further.
Several minutes passed and neither said anything as Grien tried his hardest not to move and Raxmon tried to not anger his rider further. There was a delicate balance of trust on either end. Raxmon knew of his wrong yet wanted so much to console his partner when he knew he shouldn't. Grien, on the other hand, wanted no pity from Raxmon as he thought it was all his dragon's fault. Grien was partly true in his assumption as Raxmon was the one responsible for the grievous wounds which lacerated his hands and the soft insides of his legs. He had, however, been the cause of the never-ending pain which seemed to strike at him from both raw places.
Finally Raxmon reached out with his snout, his own newness to the dragon-rider bond causing his question to seem more like a request than a way of reconciling with Grien. Am I forgiven?
No.
Raxmon was stunned by this. His rider had a right to be mad but for him to be unwilling to allow his own dragon to comfort him was something that Raxmon took as the beginning of denial and a lack of trust, which had been shaky since the start.
But I can . . .
No.
Raxmon sighed, lowering himself to the ground as Grien kept his eyes on his dragon. He was unwilling to yield only because of his hurt. The pain still flared at him, nearly driving him senseless as he had never known such pain existed before, yet the pain was also hurting his heart. Raxmon had, in Grien's mind, attacked him by stripping away at his flesh and crippling their relationship before it had a chance to bloom. This pain, this hurt, would not go away unnoticed.
Minutes became hours and soon the dusk of night descended upon the land. Clothed in a soft, subtle shade of grey, Grien finally raised a hand as his green eyes glanced with ever meaningful watchfulness.
You may come, he uttered softly as Raxmon raised his head, having laid it down during the long hours which had past since he had hurt his rider.
This understanding and the words in which Grien spoke were not enough to convince Raxmon fully. He snorted and stared at Grien for a moment, his green eyes matching those of his partner.
Are you certain?
I am. Grien lowered his hand, still raw from the earlier events of the day. His expression was one that even Raxmon could take as willingness for such contact to be made between them.
How did you make up your mind? Raxmon questioned as he stood and advanced towards his rider.
It was something I debated on but then I realized that the path in which we now follow as one is long and we must be willing to confront whatever stands before us.
You are growing wiser, Raxmon remarked as he laid down beside his reconnected rider, both sets of green eyes matching in the dimming light as dusk turned steadily to night.
Perhaps, Grien muttered as Raxmon curled up behind him and folded a wing over his friend. I don't think that you give yourself enough credit for being as smart as you are.
Oh, really? The skepticism in Raxmon's voice was next to none and Grien chuckled softly as he allowed himself to lie down beside the powerful claws of his mind-bonded dragon.
Don't think too hard on it, Grien chuckled as he sighed and laid his head down upon the grass, fading quickly into sleep as Raxmon remained awake, unable to fall asleep for some reason.
As soon as the soft, drifting hum of Grien's snoring reached him, Raxmon sighed and lifted his head to the sky. Stars glistened and shimmered above them, their lights unfading even as wisps of clouds past over them and then drifted apart.
Raxmon knew what was keeping him awake. Narssia, his mate and the very one he would protect to the death, was not with him and it left a deep hurt in his very being. He had a rider now but yet his mate was unable to see this new joyfulness for her own eyes.
Realizing that he might be able to reach out to her by mental thought, the golden dragon hummed pleasantly from deep in his throat and thrust out his entire mind beyond its borders to where it was uncomfortable for him.
Narssia?
No response. No familiar tendril of thought that bore her harsh tone. He was alone in his thoughts and alone in the night as Grien slept soundly beside him.
There was little need for him to worry, Raxmon decided as he laid his head down upon the gently swaying grass under him. Perhaps his mate had drifted to sleep already? That was a possibility after all.
Snorting as he closed his eyes and allowed for sleep to wash over him, the golden beast became calm as the peacefulness of sleep enfolded him as a mother does its newborn child. Within seconds he had faded into his own dreams and the remnants of the future and past he could glimpse from his precognitive dreaming.
Unaware to him, however, Narssia had indeed responded shortly after he had succumbed to the warmth of much needed rest. Her voice had rang out loud and true but he had not heard it nor could he had responded.
I cannot forgive you for the dark act in which you displayed to hurt me by killing Shruikan. Therefore, I have decided to return to Uru'baen and inform Galbatorix of your actions in the taking of a life from an innocent dragon. May you find no peace in your own dreams, Raxmon Goldenfang.