Review thank yous to kazzyj, seaman scotty, krystilauren and wickeduk. HEre's the next instalment, wickeduk, I hope it keeps you amused on the train.

37 - Ship's Gossip

Elena stayed on deck after he went in, she had thought for a moment he might talk to her, but when he left it was quite clear that for some reason he still hadn't forgiven her for being associated with ASIO. As she stood there she began to think, maybe he was just using it as an excuse. After all when he'd approached her at the bar, it was clear he wasn't expecting to see her, maybe he was just relieved that he'd got a reason to dump her so he could go back to his old ways.

Men like him didn't want commitment or routine, for a while she may have been a challenge, but the chase hadn't lasted long and that's what guys like him thrived on. They didn't do all the stuff that came after. In the beginning she was his commanding officer, it added that extra rush of adrenalin and he probably gloated the whole time she was on that patrol that he'd managed to get her into bed.

She stared over to the railing where he had been standing then looked back at the expanse of sea behind them. She wondered why she allowed herself to fall for the wrong guys, ones that seemed to drop her when her job got in the way. It had happened twice before when she'd dated guys out of the service, this time she broke her personal rules and let herself get sucked in to thinking that he understood, that there was some common ground that would keep them together because he was Navy too.

Maybe the problem was that she was a senior officer, she was too intimidating, perhaps she should give up the Navy, go and run the ranch full time. It needed someone to take the reins of the business, but then again she was still a woman in a position of authority, how many people would she meet in those circles that would see her any other way?

It felt like a million different things were running through her head, each becoming less coherent than the last. She sat down on the deck her back against the rails just let everything wash over her as the waves lapped against the side of the ship and the engines droned beneath her.

….

Dutchy passed the galley and heard noises then paused and pushed the door open.

"Sorry X, I heard a noise." He'd already begun backing out when Megan spoke.

"It's okay, I couldn't sleep and thought I'd make some hot chocolate, can I get you something?"

"Nah, I'm already wired on too much coffee, I should get some sleep." He tried again to leave, but stopped when she looked at him.

"She wouldn't tell me what happened between you and I don't suppose you'll tell me either and officially I don't need to know, but neither of you have been normal today, you're both trying hard to keep things professional-"

"Do you have a problem with me Ma'am?" He interrupted, not wanting to listen to a lecture but was curious if she would take sides.

"No, and as she told me it's none of my business and right now officially it isn't, but I just don't want to see things escalate to the extent that it becomes a problem. Dutchy I'd like to think that I'm your friend as well as hers and I can see whatever it is has got to both of you. You need to talk," she advised in the friendliest tone she could muster.

"With all due respect Ma'am, there's nothing I can say to her right now that will make any difference," he answered tersely.

Megan stirred the two cups of hot chocolate carefully as she appeared to consider her next words, he waited to hear if she had any response and figuring it may take a while he leant against the fridge intending to hear her out hoping that she might tell him something that would help him resolve the inner conflict he felt every time he argued with Elena.

"If this gets back to her that I've told you she's gonna kill me, but I'm going to say it anyway … I've known Elena for years, we met soon after we joined up. She's a brilliant academic and was fast-tracked from the start, as a result she doesn't have as much practical experience, she's more of a diplomat, but she can still stand her ground in a crisis." Dutchy stood patiently hoping she would get to the point so he could leave without appearing rude. "Anyway I'm off track," she began again. "The thing is right from the minute I saw you together the day we boarded that boat and she's not ready to admit it to herself yet, but she's fallen for you Petty Officer Dylan Mulholland, and she will continue to let things stay the way they are until you do something about it. I don't know what caused the rift between you and I don't want to know, but I'm guessing it has something to do with this mission and her role in it. She would have wanted things in the open with you before the briefing."

Dutchy's head was spinning as Megan paused to get her breath back after the lengthy speech. "X, are you serious?" he asked as her words slowly formed into coherent sentences in his tired brain.

"We're off duty and talking about a friend, it's Megan and yes I'm perfectly serious. Elena doesn't just fall for anyone and I don't think she's ever fallen this hard, but there's something else you should know. She might be in charge at work and have her stripes and medals to show for it, but when she takes her uniform off she's actually quite a traditional woman when it comes to relationships and she thinks too many men are intimidated by her rank to pay her any serious attention."

"Then she's an idiot," Dutchy answered without thinking.

Megan smiled. "Have you tried telling her that? Actually, telling her won't work, you need to show her."

Listening to Megan talk he could see what she was saying about Elena, but could it be that simple and he wondered if he was letting his memories of Madeleine cloud what was really happening. He was intrigued. "Maybe sometime you can tell me more," he suggested. "Your drinks are getting cold."

"I was going to talk to Elena, but I've stuffed up enough for tonight, I'm going to head back to bed. Perhaps you could do me a favour and take this to her, I suspect she's somewhere on deck." She held up one of the cups.

"Boat deck, she spent a lot of time out there during our patrol." He hadn't intended to give away her hideout, but he thought someone should talk to her.

"She hates being cooped up and if she's upset or angry she likes to be outside. Given the chance she'd be out riding, she finds it therapeutic."

"I think it would be better if you went out, she's more likely to forgive you." He was still assimilating the fact that, at least according to her best friend, she had fallen for him. It sounded more than her just being along for the ride as she said that day on the boat.

"You know I really think I'm the last person Elena wants to see. She's hiding out there to avoid me, but she would like to talk to you."

"I was just out there, she never said a word," he said, unable to figure out what Megan was talking about. It made him wonder how anything ever got done if women were so complex.

"Did you?" she asked pointedly.

"No."

"Then she won't, she'll wait for you to start the conversation, it's her way of trying to protect herself." Although Dutchy seriously doubted that Elena or any of the female officers would need protection he couldn't help but start to wonder if he would ever really understand her.

"And me taking her a mug of hot chocolate will make a difference?" he asked, still confused as to Megan's view on things.

"It's an olive branch, a starting point. Don't let the ASIO thing get in the way she's only doing it because she has to." That was the second time that day that someone had said that she was only doing the ASIO job because she had to. He was about to ask her what she meant when the door opened to the galley and Charge stuck his head in.

"Ah, ma'am you're needed on the bridge," he greeted, his tone relieved, like he had been looking for her for a while.

Megan handed Dutchy the two mugs and looked at him. "Think about what I said." She offered cryptically before leaving the room. Charge then looked at Dutchy.

"You alright mate? You look like you just got a grilling."

"You could say that." Dutchy answered pensively, "I'm beginning to think I stuffed up big time Charge."

"Well there's only one answer for that-" Charge paused as if his comment needed no explanation.

"What's that?" Dutchy asked finally.

"Grovelling …. Big time, … and if you're talking about a woman, I suggest flowers, or jewellery and don't talk about other women," the engineer answered conspiratorially.

"That's what got me into trouble in the first place."

"You told her about last night?" Dutchy wondered what everyone's interest was about last night. He wasn't aware that the rumour still circulating was that he slept with someone from the bar and no one had made the connection with Elena.

"Nah, worse, I accused her of being an ASIO double agent." There, he'd finally voiced what was really bothering him.

"The Lt- Cdr?" Charge asked surprised. "That's gonna take some major sucking up, good luck with finding the right option," Charge hissed. "Maybe it would have been better to tell her about the brunette."

"That won't work either, she already knows."

Charge's eyes nearly popped out of his head. "Let me get this straight, … she knows about the brunette last night and you fight over an ASIO double agent? You've got your priorities screwed mate, you should be-" he was stopped by the sudden laughter emanating from his crew mate. "Okay, am I missing something here?"

Dutchy suppressed the laughter, "Charge I'm surprised at you. We fooled you."

Charge looked confused for a moment, then his eyes nearly popped again as the realisation sunk in what his shipmate was saying. "You mean it was the Lt-Cdr in the bar? But she's not brunette."

"She was on covert surveillance, after you guys left we went back to her hotel."

"And she didn't tell you about ASIO until this morning," Charge confirmed, finally connecting the dots. "2-Dads is gonna love this."

"Charge! You can't say anything only the seniors are supposed to know about her ASIO Status. Whatever my problems are with that shouldn't be used against her to make her the subject of ships gossip."

"So it's safer to let them think you were with some other woman and that's why you're fighting?"

"It's working isn't it?"

Charge sighed then gave him a half grin, "you still owe her some major sucking up."

He walked out leaving Dutchy looking at the two mugs he was holding, which surprisingly were still hot. He decided that even if things didn't get back to where they were the night before, he still missed talking to her, so he headed towards the deck for the second time that night.

….

Elena watched him walk across the deck towards her carrying two mugs, one of which he handed to her before sitting down next to her. She sipped the hot liquid and waited for him to speak, but he didn't.

"Thanks for the chocolate," she ventured finally, trying to break the ice.

"The X made it, I'm just the messenger, she got called away." His voice bore none of the hallmarks of his normally laid back mood, he sounded dejected.

"I'm glad you came back," she answered, not that she expected anything to come of it.

He put down his cup next to him and rested his head back. "I would have brought real chocolate too, but Bird's found a new hiding place for it."

"That's okay, it's too late for food anyway. This is perfect." She answered indicating the drink but then lapsing into silence. They were sitting so their shoulders were virtually touching and she was tempted to rest her head on him, but their position on deck and the current rift between them stopped her. She wondered whether he was staying because he felt obliged or because he wanted to, so she gave him an option, "you don't have to stay if there's somewhere else you need to be."

She wasn't really sure what to expect after what happened at breakfast, but it was like all the fight had gone out of him, his answers were monotone and carefully thought through. "Where do you want me to be?"

"That's a loaded question and I guess it depends on what you want. I'm not about to force you to sit here and talk to me if you'd rather be somewhere else." She would admit to being a little cross at the way he turned the offer back onto her, after all he was the one with the problem not her, he had been the one to walk away.

"And if I want to sit here?"

She took a deep breath, considering what to say, hoping that she could keep her frustration contained, "Dylan, I don't know what you expect me to say … this morning I tried to be honest with you and it backfired pretty spectacularly. I know you've got issues with ASIO, but I can't continue to compete with the ghosts of your past and if it still affects you this much then maybe you need to consider getting help, talking to someone about the shooting, about what Madeleine did."

"I've had counselling and passed fit for duty," he snapped.

"Well there's something going on and you need to find a way to deal with it," his reaction was enough to make her snap at him in return, releasing some tension.

Elena started to stand up but he reached out and wrapped his hand around her arm stopping her. "Don't go." The anger from a few seconds earlier was gone again and the defeated tone was back, but it wasn't getting them anywhere.

"It's not going to do either of us any good sitting out here trading punches. It's only a few hours until we plan on boarding the Russian Trawler, we both need sleep." He let her arm go, but she didn't move, nor did she look at him; now kneeling on the deck she tried to work up the energy to walk away.

"I'm sorry Elena, tell me I'm an idiot, … I don't want this, you said ASIO and I just can't shake the feeling that it's all gonna happen again. I know it's stupid and I'm probably wrong-"

He stopped speaking suddenly and she looked up, "you are wrong, but I guess I have no way to prove it to you. I know what's in your file, but I don't think that's the whole story, there's something else that maybe no one knows. …. You don't have to tell me, but you need to deal with it." Elena pushed herself to her feet, picked up her cup and paused for a few seconds. "Try and get some sleep."

She turned and walked away. Nothing was really resolved, but she felt as if things maybe weren't quite as bad as before.

…..

Swain climbed the stairs to the bridge early the next morning, carrying two mugs of coffee. Dutchy was sat at the helm and two other junior sailors were at the EOD and marine link consoles, he sat in the command chair and handed over one of the mugs to Dutchy.

"Thanks mate."

"Did you get any sleep last night?" Swain asked keeping his voice low so the others didn't hear.

"Some."

"You know I'm starting to see a pattern with the last time she was on board." Swain gauged his words carefully.

"You have a point Swaino?" Dutchy asked raising his mug to take a drink.

"You two had a disagreement yesterday at breakfast, she's been ultra-professional and you've been miserable ever since. NAVCOM already know about your relationship so it makes me wonder why you're creating obstacles." There was nothing to report about breaking the fraternisation rules because the brass already knew and the fact that the whole crew knew about them and would certainly rib Dutchy over it would be enough to keep their behaviour discreet.

"Not their choice, ASIO called the shots on this one, she's the only one in Cairns that speaks Russian." That at least made some kind of logical sense, but it still didn't explain why they were creating problems where they didn't exist before.

"Puts you in a difficult position though," Swain commented, glancing over his shoulder to ensure their quiet conversation remained confidential.

"I can handle it." He sounded somewhat confident, but Swain still wasn't convinced and at the risk of pushing things too far he continued.

"You know when you're not trying to avoid each other you're good together, reminds me a bit of me and Sal. Elena's got enough fire and guts to keep you on your toes and you need that, those women in bars may be fine for a night, but they're not the ones you want for the long haul."

"And you think I'm looking for the long haul?"

"Since Laurel Andrews you've changed, you don't get the same enjoyment from the women who flaunt themselves at you." Swain was still hedging somewhat rather than being direct, still wary about getting on the Bosun's wrong side, because although Dutchy might not be speaking to Elena he would still back her in an argument with any of the ship's crew. Despite his reputation he still had a certain respect for women and a need to see them protected.

"So great guru what do you suggest?" The slightly more jovial tone made Swain smile, now he could edge the conversation towards the real issue.

"I assume she knows about Madeleine."

"Only what's in our files." Swain had hoped for a more detailed answer, but Dutchy clearly wasn't ready to open up completely.

"You've not talked about her?"

"Swaino it's done, telling every little gory detail is not going to do anything." While Dutchy wasn't angry, his tone was firm enough to say he didn't want to open old wounds and this subject would do that.

"That's where you're wrong my friend, she's a smart woman and she'll know that not everything will be in your file. Most of the details will be in the official reports that she won't have access to. You should tell her the whole story," Swain tried to sound encouraging, pointing out the misconception about how much Elena may actually know of the whole terrorism plot they had been embroiled in a few months earlier. He knew only too well how raw some of the wounds still were.

"You think it will make a difference?" Dutchy asked, seeming to think seriously about the possibility.

Swain thought about how they'd watched each other surreptitiously during the briefing the day before and the half conversation he had shared with her over dinner, "she's confused, you blow her off because of her ASIO status but refuse to tell her why."

"She knows Madeleine betrayed us, the country," Dutchy countered, making another attempt at avoiding the subject.

Swain had no option now but to force the point, "does she know she tried to kill you?"

"If it's in-" Dutchy started, but he wasn't allowed to get away with it this time.

"Your file, I get it. You need to tell her, I think it would help your situation. She'll have a better understanding of why you have taken this so hard."

Unfortunately footsteps on the stairs announced the arrival of Kate and Megan and stopped any further conversation.

"Good morning, everything alright Swain?" Kate asked assuming he was in charge from where he was sitting.

Dutchy was the one to answer, "actually ma'am we haven't handed over yet, all's quiet, we still have the trawler on radar just over the horizon, they're still steaming for the island. RO should be up soon with the weather report and any updates from NAVCOM."

"Okay, thank you Dutchy, head off for breakfast. Swain sound the wakeup call for the crew. … Captain has the ship."

"Captain has the ship," echoed Dutchy as he left the helm and handed over to Swain. Kate sat in the command chair while Megan checked over the radar and EOD images and assessed their course options.

Another day on Hammersley had begun.

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