Chapter 35- What's Mine is Yours

So in response to a Cruz7808: Yes I will use your idea, I like it but also no. Two people have asked for me to do entire chapters with different people reacting to an episode which I think is a good idea. But in the end this is a RWBY and JNPR reacts to red vs blue fic, not Teachers, Criminals, etc reacting. I will only do them as side stories, I could make the side stories longer but I won't dedicate: an entire chapter to them and ignore the main cast. Thanks for the support and the suggestions!

Please make any suggestions you want I will consider them, and speaking about that, no to the guest reviewer who asked for me to do a plot point where the achievemen made a show called Blue vs Red, interesting Idea but I can't write it in a good way. I made the Achievemen reference because Achievmen is Canon in RWBY.

—-

"What's Mine is yours" appeared on the screen.

"I thought it was the other way around?" Nora said confused.

"It is, it's supposed to be whats yours is mine." Ren explained.

Nora nodded.

The scene opened to show Tucker and Caboose on top of the blue base

Tucker: "Man Caboose, you were asleep for a long time. What were you dreaming about?"

Caboose: "Oh, nothing. I do not like to dream. I try not to think while I'm sleeping."

"Is it even possible?" Ruby asked.

"I've tried many times." Ren replied.

"Thinking while you're sleeping?" Yang asked. "Whats the point in sleeping if you're thinking?"

"Efficiency." Ren responded.

"Ugh." Nora sighed. "Ren is constantly trying to find the most efficient way of doing things. Have any of you noticed how he even counts his steps to see how far away something he needs to grab is? and- and, just the little annoying things he does?" Nora asked.

Jaune and Pyrrha laughed. "Yes we have." Pyrrha answered.

"There is nothing wrong with efficiency." Ren replied. "Always move forward, no time to waste time."

"Thats a good motto but it sounds like you overdo it." Blake said.

Ren just shrugged.

Tucker: "That's pretty much how you function when you're awake, too."

Weiss and Yang chuckled.

Caboose: "I think consistency is important."

Weiss laughed again.

"You're starting to enjoy the show more." Pyrrha commented.

"Like I said I enjoy some of the jokes." Weiss said.

"Hostage syndrome." Blake whispered to Ren who had to hold in his laughter.

Church: "Well you look okay... then again that's... just the armor. How d'you feel?"

Caboose: "Great! ...Who're you?"

Yang and Ruby giggled.

Church: "Oh COME ON, not this again! How can you seriously not remember me?"

Caboose: "Oh of course, I remember you... you're Marvin."

Church: "I'm Church."

Caboose: "I think I would remember a name that ridiculous. Nope, you are definitely Phil."

Church: "You killed me with the tank."

Caboose: "Dave."

Church: "You insulted my girlfriend, you called her a cow?"

Caboose: "Karen."

"I wonder if these names are important." Ren said.

"What? How would they be?" Weiss asked curiously.

"Oh I get what Ren's saying! A reference to the creators of the show! Or people they know." Jaune said.

Everyone suddenly very interested, stopped talking and payed attention.

Tucker: "Dude, he called her a slut."

Caboose: "Phineous?"

Church: "Your whole life is based around pleasing me."

Caboose: "Wally."

Church: "In fact..."

Caboose: "Milo?"

Church: "I think you're kind of obsessed with being my best friend."

"I do wonder why Caboose latched onto Church." Weiss commented.

"Symbol of authority?" Blake suggested.

"Maybe." Ren said.

Caboose: "(turning to Tucker and whispering loudly) The new guy is pretty full of himself."

Church: "New guy, what the- I'm not the new guy, you're the new guy."

Tucker: "I don't know, I kinda like it. I could get used to calling you Rookie."

Church: "Oh yeah? Could you get used to me beating you to death?"

Caboose: "What's wrong with the rookie? He seems mad."

Church: "Oh son of a bitch."

Caboose: "Susan?"

Cut to the red base. Donut is jumping in the middle, trying to get on the upper level, including grunting jumping effort noises, while Grif watches

Grif: "Donut, there's no way you can jump that high."

Donut: "Yes I can. (jumps) (while jumping a second time) Yes I can."

"Hmm." Nora hummed tapping her chin in thought.

Simmons: "What the hell is he doing?"

Grif: "Losing a bet."

"Oh! Jumping contest! Who wants to make a bet?" Nora asked.

"What?" Weiss asked.

"Lets see who can jump the highest!" Nora yelled.

"Yeah!...but not now lets finish the season, then we can do it." Yang said.

"I can jump higher than everyone here." Ruby said confidently.

"Awe! But you're so short." Yang teased.

Ruby angrily huffed and threw a pillow at Yang's face.

Donut: "Oah, I almost got it that time. Are you sweatin' yet, sucker!?"

Grif: "No, I can't sweat. Simmons' stupid sweat glands don't even work right."

"Knew Sarge wasn't that good." Weiss commented.

"I think we all did." Yang replied.

Simmons: "What? They were working when I gave them to you."

Grif: "Please, I'm not moist in any of the usual places. If you want 'em back so bad, take 'em."

Simmons: "(sigh) I can't. Sarge said that sweat makes my cyborg parts rusty, so, I'm cooled by freon now."

"I wonder how much of a Cyborg he truly is." Pyrrha commented.

"there are rumors that General Ironwood is a cyborg, or at least has robotic implants." Weiss commented.

"I can believe that." Yang said.

"Seems likely." Blake added.

Grif: "Ah, delicious freon. (violent coughing and throat clearing)"

Donut: "(jumping) Hwup!"

Simmons: "Grif, are you alright? Are my lungs okay? Hey, wait a minute, are you smoking inside your helmet again!?"

Almost everyone sighed.

"Really? They have smoking in this universe too?" Ruby complained.

"Not another universe." Weiss huffed.

"Looks like it." Yang commented ignoring Weiss.

Grif: "What!? No! (exhales cigarette smoke) ...Oops."

"I had a feeling those were air vents." Pyrrha said pointing to the screen.

Simmons: "Dammit, I knew this would happen. And how many snack cakes have you had today?"

Grif: "None."

Simmons: "..."

Grif: "Okay five. ...or more."

Donut: "Hungh!"

Grif: "Baker's dozen at most."

Simmons: "Do you even know how many there are in a baker's dozen?"

"13" Ren said.

"Why is it called a bakers dozen?" Ruby asked.

"No idea." Ren replied.

"And why is it 13?" Yang asked.

"Don't complain! Its extra food!" Nora said excitedly.

"Good point." Yang replied.

Grif: "By my count?"

Donut: "Hup!"

Grif: "Forty eight."

"Wow, he sounds like Ruby." Yang commented.

"Are you saying I'm fat?!" Ruby yelled checking herself for belly rolls.

"Ruby, Mom used to have to make two trays of cookies just for you because you ate so many." Yang explained.

Ruby laughed remembering the good times.

Simmons: "Alright, that's it. No more smoking..."

Donut: "Hwauhw..."

Simmons: "No more drinking, and no more overeating, chubby."

"Good rules." Jaune commented.

Donut: "HWUP!"

Simmons: "You're not gonna ruin my body parts the same way you ruined yours."

Grif: "That's okay, I can think of different ways to ruin them."

[Sound of a tremendous catastrophe]

Donut: "Ah ah ow, aahhhhh. Who left the spleen-ball where someone could trip on it? I think I broke something. Simmons; I need your ovaries!"

Everyone except Weiss, Blake, and Ren laughed.

Simmons: "Huoh, I really hate this army."

Sarge arrives

Sarge: "Grif, Simmons two point 0. I just got off the horn to Command. I'm afraid we have a situation."

Simmons: "Uhh, don't tell me they cancelled the holiday party again. Those cheap bastards. All I wanted was one night of carefree dancing, but noooo, I ask you when is it gonna be Simmons' turn? When?!"

Everyone looked at the screen confused, not getting the reference.

Grif and Sarge look at each other

Sarge: "Ah, actually the problem is with Lopez."

Grif: "Don't tell me. The Consulate General from Spanish land is coming, and without Lopez, we don't have anyone to translate."

"Spanish land?" Ren muttered.

Simmons: "There's no such thing as Spanish land you retard."

Ren huffed and scribbled out that part of his notes.

Grif: "Yes there is, they have those uh, uh, water slides. And all that salsa."

Simmons: "No, they don't."

Grif: "Well, I guess you would know."

Simmons: "WHAT'S THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN? For the last time, I'm DUTCH IRISH!"

"I wonder why Grif keeps confusing his race." Yang commented.

"Probably because of the armor." Jaune suggested.

"They have to know what each other look like without armor though, right?" Yang asked.

"Likely" Pyrrha answered. "Teammates live in close quarters."

Grif: "Hey, don't let your fiery Latin temper get outta control. I was just trying to make a point."

"Hmm sounds slightly racist." Blake mumbled.

"I agree, but it seems that the creators are fine with it, maybe one of them is Spanish." Ren said.

"It's possible." Pyrrha added.

Sarge: "Can it, Frankenstein. We've got a pot on the front burner, and it's a-boilin' over. I've just learned that Command implanted Lopez with secret instructions detailing the next phase of our operations. Do you have any idea what this means?"

Grif: "I uh, uh... Simmons, you wanna take this one?"

Simmons: "Were you not listening again? What the hell were you thinking about?"

Grif: "Certainly not water slides, I can tell you that much. Or salsa."

Sarge: "What it means is that if we don't get back Lopez before the blues uncover our secret plans, we'll be up pooper creek without a paddle."

"Nasty." Weiss groaned.

Grif: "Eeeew. Gi-a... that's gross!"

Sarge: "I'm talking about being lost in a forest of filth without a compass. Swimmin' in a river of sick with no floaties on. Drivin' blind, in to the tunnel of-"

Simmons: "Sir, I think we get the picture. The very very disturbing picture."

"Wish I wasn't." Ruby said holding her stomach.

Sarge: "You sure? I could go on."

Grif: "I'm sure you could. But no. Really."

Sarge: "Just one more."

Grif: "Stop."

Sarge: "Come on, they're fun. Simmons, you try one, I'll start you off. Flyin' by the seat of your blank, with a blank in the blank. Eh?"

"Hmm, Flying by the seat of your...Pants with a...monkey? In the..." Yang started. "Can someone help me out here?"

"In the back?" Ruby suggested.

"Cockpit?" Nora added.

Simmons: "Sorry sir, I'mmm not good at word games."

Sarge: "Ah, you're both a couple lousy blanks."

"Now that ones easier to guess. Lousy pieces of sh-" Yang started.

"Ugh play the next one!" Ruby yelled with a hand over Yang's mouth.

—-Side story 1—

"Have any of you had any luck finding out what this spanish language is?" Cinder asked.

"No mam." Mercury replied frustrated.

"So much of this stuff we don't understand." Emerald said equally frustrated.

"Keep trying, I expect results." Cinder replied coldly. "I have a meeting with our animalistic friends, continue to watch the episodes. When I get back I want a full report on everything that happened."

"Yes mam." Both replied quickly.

—non canon side story 2—-

"Hmmm." Ozpin hummed staring at his computer screen. "This is rather...unexpected."

—-

Wonder if anyone noticed the Monty Oum reference with Ren and efficiency, listening to the old RT podcasts that had Monty on them are insane. Monty was hilarious and meticulous, Burnie joked about Monty counting steps but he did it so regularly that I realized, oh he's not joking, monty wanted to know how far away something like a bathroom was from his workspace so he could be more efficient.

I Miss Monty Oum and everything about him, I wish I could have met him too. Sorry to bring you all down but anyway hope you enjoyed the chapter.