I have a surprise for you! :D
I hope this long(ish) chapter makes up for me missing this week's update.
Wish me luck!
-Anii
Chapter 37: "There's beauty in the breakdown."
― Let Go by Frou Frou
Itachi's eyes watched the flickering flames without wavering, the tightness in his chest growing stronger. To a normal person, the pain would be unbearable. However, to him, it was nothing exceptional.
The pain wasn't what bothered him; it was the reason for the pain that struck a cord in his chest and caused him to grind his teeth together. It was her. It was always her. There wasn't a day that went by that his mind didn't wander to her once or twice.
Itachi bent his head low, frustration bubbling in his chest.
"Thinking about her again?"
Itachi didn't need to lift his head to put the voice to a face. Deidara sat beside him, the fire casting dancing shadows across his face. "For once, I can read your mind."
Itachi didn't reply and snuffed out the slight anger at Deidara's words before it could do any unneeded damage.
Deidara's head turned, his one visible eye watching Itachi nonchalantly. "I know you're big, bad, and stoic but you aren't above love."
Itachi nearly snorted with contempt but he remained silent, the crackling fire filling the silence until Deidara spoke once more. "You know anything about Myths?"
Instead of waiting for a reply, Dediara pressed on, his gaze drifting back towards the fire. "There was a God who kept to himself and scoffed at the thought of love, even going so far as to say that he couldn't fall in love. Well the Goddess of Love heard and, in anger, she shot him with one of her arrows. The God immediately fell in love with the first woman he saw, who happened to be the daughter of another Goddess."
"Is there a point here?" Itachi murmured.
"The point is, even God's aren't above love. You aren't arrogant, Itachi, you're just a realist. So, do you think you're above the Gods?"
"I don't believe in Gods and Goddesses." Itachi whispered as he pushed himself off of the ground.
He heard Diedara sigh heavily as he walked away from the small fire and towards the decrepit boarding house. His hand brushed against the door frame as he stepped inside.
••••••••
Sakura glanced between the two girls walking in front of her and asked the question hanging above all of their heads. "What do we do now?"
"I'm thinking." Ume snapped, her spine straightening.
"You've been thinking for three hours now." Kameko noted.
"Shut up. You're still mad at me because I made you wear that mask." Ume tried to hide the small smile parting her lips but Sakura caught a glimpse of it.
Kameko's face scrunched up with disgust and she stuck her long tongue out. "I can still taste the tang of metal in my mouth."
Ume rolled her eyes and the group lapsed into silence. Ume cleared her throat and shifted uncomfortably. "Sakura?"
"Mhm?" Sakura's head lifted at the sound of her name.
"I don't understand you."
Sakura blinked in confusion. "I'm…sorry?"
Ume waved her hands. "What I mean is, you're a ninja from Konohagakure, right?"
"I am." Sakura answered apprehensively.
"Then why where you with that Uchiha?"
"I told you." Sakura replied. "To stop Sasuke."
"I don't understand that either." Ume mumbled. "Why is this Sasuke such a big deal?"
Sakura's gaze lowered to her feet. "He's doing bad things. Very bad things that could lead to another war."
"I got that, but why?" Ume rubber her temple.
Sakura thought for a moment before responding. "I don't really know. I've never understood Sasuke." Her voice dropped low. "It didn't stop me from loving him though."
"Ah."
Sakura raised an eyebrow, her gaze snapping back up to Ume. "What do you mean 'ah'?"
"Sasuke is Itachi's brother and you are Sasuke's girlfriend. It would make sense that you would want to actively participate in his capture or death. You both shouldered a responsibility that belongs to neither of you."
"Why does it matter?" Sakura grumbled, her defensive side sliding into place. "And I'm not his girlfriend."
"It doesn't." Ume answered shortly.
Sakura sulked behind the two girls, deciding to let the silence grow between them. However, Ume pressed on moments later. "Why do you trust us?"
Sakura let out a breath of relief in the slight turn of topics. "Because if you wanted me dead, I would be dead by now. Besides, Sumiko got into trouble in the first place because of me and I'll only bother Itachi."
"Don't you think you're bothering us?"
Sakura's jaw snapped shut, a blush scorching her cheeks.
Ume glanced over her shoulder, smiling brightly. "You aren't, Sakura. I enjoy the company." She waved her hand towards Kameko. "She's not much of a conversationalist, if you haven't noticed."
Sakura stifled her laughter as Kameko's amber eyes slid over to meet Ume's. Ume's smile disappeared, however, as she asked, "Are you upset?"
"About?" Sakura tilted her head to the side.
Ume lifted her arm, her fingers brushing against the low and full branches of the trees off to the side of the road. "Losing your companion. How long were you partners?"
"We weren't anything close to partners." Sakura murmured, a twinge of bitterness entering her voice. "But it was just a little more than a year and a half."
"How did you end up in the Akatsuki again?"
"To save a friend." Sakura whispered, her voice sending Ume a warning that she was done talking about her past at the moment.
Sakura knew that Ume was only trying to understand her and strike up a conversation but Sakura's wounded heart was begining to hurt as memories passed through her thoughts. Ume spoke quietly to Kameko and Sakura took in a deep breath, thankful that Ume had gotten the hint.
Truthfully, Sakura was merely surviving on adrenaline. It had only been a few days since her separation with Itachi and yet she felt the ache so deeply in her chest that it nearly drove her insane with frustration.
She couldn't claw out the hurt or ignore it. It was always there and always throbbing painfully. Her hand slid up her chest and rested over her heart, which beat steadily beneath her palm.
She hated the weakness inside of her and constantly berated herself for it. Itachi had probably already forgotten her name and yet here she was whining over a love she hadn't even known existed until it was shattered.
Sakura's teeth bit down on her lower lip as her head drooped forward. It'll go away soon, Sakura. Just hold in there.
••••••••
Sakura dropped to her knees by the bank of the stream, her hands sinking below the water's shining surface.
Insects chirped as twilight fell on the world, drowning everything in a warm golden glow. Sakura cupped the water between her hands, brought them to her lips, and tipped her head back. She greedily sipped down the water, sweaty and parched from her rigorous training with Ume.
A small, proud smile tugged at her lips as she thought about her progress. Sakura drank several more handfuls of water, filled all three canteens, and meandered back to the campsite, humming softly as the bright red-orange sun sunk below the horizon.
Ume avoided Sakra's eyes and worked to spark a fire in the makeshift fire pit she had created. Sakura shrugged it off, understanding Ume slightly better after the few days she had spent with her. Sakura paused, her eyes widening slightly. Has it really only been a few days?
She chuckled softly and ran her fingers through her hair. I'm losing it.
She felt unusually light-hearted as she collapsed on her bedroll, snuggling against the thin yet soft cushioning. "That fish you made was delicious, Kameko."
Kameko gently laid herself out on her own bedroll. "I always carry a few spices with me on journeys. They come in handy."
Sakura smiled and a spark ignited the wood in the pit, bringing a tiny flame to life. Ume blew heartily onto the little flame until it roared to life into a nice-sized fire. Ume spread out her bedroll across the fire from Sakura and the Moon Ninja flopped down on her bedroll without much ado. "We leave before dawn tomorrow."
"Aye aye, captain." Sakura teased, rolling onto her side. "Goodnight."
She didn't, however, miss the shared glance between Ume and Kameko. Her interest peeked slightly but exhaustion overpowered her and she slipped into her dreams easily.
••••••••
Sakura felt a whisper of a breath caress her cheek. "Ume, get out of my dreams." Sakura mumbled groggily.
Ume's voice echoed in the chamber of Sakura's mind. "No. You need to face reality?"
"What are you talking about? Facing what? Can't you just let me sleep? We have to be up early and you've been killing me in training." Sakura scrunched up her nose as she hissed, "Besides, this isn't reality! It's a dream."
"You know what I mean!" Ume snorted and Sakura could hear the annoyance in the dream walker's voice. "Did you think I wouldn't find out?"
"Find out what?" Sakura groaned, Sleep tugging at her mind, begging her to sink back into its warmth.
"You're in the love with the Uchiha."
Sakura's patience was fraying. She needed sleep. "I already told you about Sasuke."
"The older Uchiha." Ume added.
Ume's words were like a cold slap to the face. Sakura stared into the hazy empty space before her, not wanting to respond.
"Did you know, when you sleep, he crosses into every dream you have? Even if he's just a townsperson wandering by, your brain puts him there." Ume informed, her mysterious voice rebounding around Sakura's skull.
Sakura felt a lump form in her throat but Ume wasn't done. "Does it comfort you? Does it make you feel like you're seeing him again? Is it filling the void he left behind-"
"This is what you were talking about when you said you didn't understand me, isn't it." Sakura whispered.
"It's one of the things that confuses me about you." Ume responded. "Why are you so afraid of accepting the-"
"Stop it!" Sakura snapped her eyes shut tightly.
"Open your eyes." Ume ordered.
Sakura disobeyed, causing Ume to bark, "I said 'open your eyes'!"
Sakura covered her ears but to no avail. Ume's voice still broke through, however, she spoke softly this time. "What would you do if he were with you now?"
"Nothing." Sakura answered, her eyes still shut. "I wouldn't do anything."
"Because you wouldn't let yourself. But if you could do anything you wanted, what would you do?" Ume prodded. "Just consider this a training exercise."
"Anything? All hypothetical?" Sakura asked meekly.
"Anything. Yes." Ume insisted.
Sakura cracked her eyes open as Ume's whispery words rang in her ears. Out of the haze clouding her eyes, she could see Itachi's oh-so-familiar face hovering above her. What would I do?
Sakura pushed herself up, murmuring out loud, "What would I do?"
Itachi's stoic face stared at her blankly but she saw how his eyes watched her every move. She bit down the bitter emotion that moved forward in her mind. He'd never look at her in a special way in reality, however, this was an Ume-induced dream where she could do anything she wanted.
This better not be a trick, Ume. Sakura thought nervously.
Sakura moved closer until the tip of her nose lightly pressed against his. Her eyes locked with his, not once breaking his gaze as their long ago promise surged forth in her mind. This was only a dream but she couldn't get over how realistic Itachi looked - it frightened her. She could even see the different lines of red in his eyes.
She bit down on her lip as her hands shook slightly. She inhaled silently, his scent flooding her senses. He smelled earthen - like dirt, trees, and sunshine.
Does sunshine even have a smell? Sakura teased herself, attempting to alleviate the anxiety building in her chest.
A thought crossed her mind, making her smile brightly. Someone so fantastic, mysterious, and powerful is still just a man - a human made from the same material as me.
Itachi's eyes narrowed, puzzled by her smile, but he didn't move an inch, not even when Sakura snaked her arms around his neck. Her fingers danced across the back of his head, finding and pulling down the band holding his hair together in a ponytail. She gently dragged the band free, letting Itachi's raven black hair fan out across his back.
She coiled one thin strip loosely around her finger, breaking eye contact only to stare at the midnight-black colored strand wound around her pale finger. She sucked in her breath and held it, afraid to shatter this moment.
She smiled happily, Sleep finally grabbing hold of her. Sakura whispered Itachi's name softly before her real dreams pulled her out of Ume's tempting vision. Sakura contently sank into the warm blackness of unconsciousness.
••••••••
Itachi felt his heart thump painfully under his breastbone, beating erratically as Sakura fell back onto her bedroll. He reached out to touch his hair to find his fingers trembling. His eyes shot open wide as he pulled back his hands and stared at his quivering fingers.
"I get it now."
Itachi's head snapped up as he remembered the other girls, who both stared at him. The Moon Ninja, Ume, smiled slightly while her companion sat stoically beside her. Itachi's body immediately went rigid.
"Oh stop." Ume flicked her hand at him and snorted. "I don't care if you show emotion. Do you, Kameko?"
The second girl, Kameko, didn't tear her gaze from Itachi, she just shook her head.
Itachi's fingers curled into his palms, forming two tight fists. "I don't care what you saw."
Ume's head tilted to the side. "You have feelings for her."
Itachi nearly ripped her head off as he screamed his denial, however, reality crushed him under its weight before he could move. He chose not to answer her.
"So why leave then?" Ume asked, her face scrunching with confusion.
"There's no reason to stay." Itachi whispered, his eyes locked on to Sakura's sleeping form.
"Love is plenty enough reason." Ume shot.
Her words pierced straight through his chest. His love for his village led him to join the Akatsuki. His love for his brother led to this mess. His love seemed to only cause problems.
"She has feelings for you too." Ume murmured, her tone soft and comforting.
It was as if she struck him with a hammer. The breath rushed out of him and his eyes widened again. He felt a tremor run through his body and he inhaled sharply. "Don't say that." He hissed breathlessly.
He could ignore his feelings easily. But if Sakura chose to pursue him…what would he do? He knew fully well that he couldn't deny or harm her. No. Her loving him back would only do more harm than good.
Ume's eyes narrowed. "It's tru-"
"Don't." Itachi warned, his voice dropping low as his eyes snapped to hers.
Her eyes widened and she adverted them quickly. So she knew about him and his eyes. Good.
"I can't believe you." Ume murmured just before lunging at him.
Itachi reached up and his fingers wrapped around her wrist tightly. She fought wildly for her freedom, all the while snarling and hissing at him.
"You're angry with me." Itachi noted.
"You're damn right!" She hissed.
"Ume." Kameko warned, her eyes flicking to Sakura.
"Why?" Itachi asked Ume.
The girl attempted to yank herself free of his grasp, snapping quietly at him. "Sakura is a good girl. She doesn't deserve to be rejected so harshly."
"I haven't rejected her." Itachi's eyes narrowed, confused by her ranting.
"You will." Ume stopped struggling and stared straight into his eyes, ignoring the danger. "You 're a coward. You love her and she loves you and yet you're going to deny her your love. It's disgusting."
"Her heart is weak." Itachi answered smoothly, adding fuel to the flames burning behind Ume's eyes. "She loved my brother and now she loves me. She doesn't know what she wants."
"Sakura still loves your brother. But not the way she loves you." The stoic Kameko added. She hadn't moved an inch.
Itachi felt a cord thrum in his chest and he had to force out his words carefully. "You don't know that."
"I know, Uchiha." Ume spat.
Itachi fell silent and released Ume. She jerked her arm away from him and hissed dangerously low as she craddled her wrist to her chest. "If you're going to deny her, leave now and never come back."
"I wasn't planning on coming back." Itachi said quietly.
"Planned or unplanned, don't come back." Ume barked.
Itachi was completely lost and torn right down the middle. The reasonable part of him - the one that had saved his life and made him who he was - begged him to get up and leave immediately. However, the irrational and hard-to-control side of him was fighting to scoop Sakura into his arms and never let go.
He remained rooted to the ground, the two sides of him battling for control. He looked helplessly at Ume, whose face softened the slightest. "You don't have to stay away from her."
"I do." His voice crackled.
"Then that's your choice but she's going to come after you. She's already made her plans clear to us. She'll help us find Sumiko and we'll help her stop the Fourth War. After that, she's going to prove herself to you." Ume informed.
"I can't let her find me then." Itachi closed his eyes, slowly reeling in his irrational side. "Why do you put up with her?"
"She's a good person who has the same goals as us. It'd be stupid to harm her or turn her away." Ume answered smoothly.
"But what interest is her love life to you? Why do you care if her heart is broken?" Itachi questioned.
"Because I love someone who doesn't love me back." Ume stared straight into his eyes again, ashamed of nothing. "And when I see people who truly love each other but refuse to accept it for stupid reasons, I get pissed."
"It's different." Itachi muttered. "I don't love her."
"Oh?" Ume laughed bitterly. "You think so? Even if I hadn't been inside your dreams, I can tell you love her. You wouldn't be here if you didn't."
She got him.
He sat silently for a moment, his gaze drifting towards Sakura. "There's nothing exceptional about her."
"That's not what love is-" Ume paused as Sakura turned over in her sleep, murmuring something unintelligible. Ume's voice dropped low. "She's waking up."
Itachi's muscles tightened. "I should leave."
Ume rose, turning her back to Itachi. "I suggest you make your decision soon, Uchiha."
Itachi chose to ignore her comment. "I'm sending Deidara with you."
Ume spun around sharply. "Why?"
"You're against the Fourth War, correct?"
"Yeah." Ume answered skeptically.
"Then you're allies of the New Akatsuki." Itachi's eyes closed. "Deidara will provide assistance with locating and rescuing your friend."
Ume crossed her arms over her chest. "Why don't you come with us?"
"Because I am needed elsewhere." He answered honestly.
••••••••
Sakura rolled on to her back, rubbing her temples with the heels of her palms. "Goodmorning, Kameko. Goodmorning, Ume."
"Mornin', Sakura."
Sakura bolted upright at the sound of the familiar voice. "Deidara?" She blinked the sleep from her eyes and, sure enough, there he was.
Deidara rolled back his shoulder until he grunted with satisfaction, his chest completely bare and his hair down. He smiled lazily at her. "How'd you sleep?"
Sakura let out a bellowing shriek that sent a flock of birds scattering from their homes.
The myth I spoke about is real :) It's the story of Persephone and Hades.
I kind of love that story…just a teeny bit *totally lying, I'm a hardcore fan girl for it*
I didn't think the Naruto world really had an Ancient Greece but the analogy between Hades and Itachi was just too juicy to pass up -Anii