Thirty-Five
"It is difficult to adjust to a place like Vulcan if your system is not properly prepared for it," the Healer was saying. He looked to be very young and his bedside manner was extraordinarily personable.
Given his over the top jealousy, Shanna was surprised that Siranon had allowed this Healer to get anywhere near her without him in the room. She was sitting at the Vulcan Academy Hospital in a soundproof privacy cubicle.
Healer Sonil was standing there looking at the instruments that contained her readings. He had sent Siranon out of the room on some inane errand the moment he sensed the strained nature of things between the couple. "He who is your husband sent us a notification that your pulse was not sufficient. I advised him to bring you in at once. The tests we ran have determined that yes, your heart is struggling under the weight of the great changes this planet usually puts upon humans when they first become residents."
"It's not my first time on Vulcan," she lightly protested as she looked down at the tops of her thighs. Her eyelids were so heavy. She just wanted to go to sleep, truth be told.
"It is one thing to visit a place. It is quite another to live there," said the young Healer with an overly wise expression on his face. "The gravity here is greater, the day longer than on Earth. Your body has suddenly been asked to deal with an additional 6 hours in the day!" he lectured. "The air is thinner. I am surprised, at the rate that your heart is struggling to pump, that he did not bring you in here unconscious. You must be exceptionally strong," he complimented.
She nodded. "I see." But for some reason, she didn't really.
He thought for a few seconds. She seemed to be mentally struggling to keep up with his words. "Have you been experiencing any of these symptoms: headache?"
"Yes. I wake up with a small one and go to bed with a big one every night."
"Shortness of breath? Blurred vision? Dark spots and visual floaters?"
She swallowed as she admitted, "Yes, all of that."
"A crushing or heavy sensation in the area of the chest?"
She nodded and sighed. "So what does this mean?"
"Your body is not adjusting to the planet on its own and you're in the median stages of Oxygen Deprivation and Pressure Sickness. Most visitors do not remain on Vulcan for longer than three weeks from discomfort alone. The body can take that temporary strain for a short time. You, however, have been here for over two months, and still, it is not adapting. Your body has begun to reach maximum discomfort."
She shook her head. "So I just have to adapt, right? I was taking tri-ox shots."
"Indeed, the average human body is quite capable of adapting… for those such as yourself who have more difficulty, if you are given the correct tools to adapt, you will. But at this time, you have not been given the correct tools."
She was even more confused. "Huh?"
He looked slightly amused. "Where do you obtain your triple oxygen compound?"
She shrugged simply. "I pick up my tri-ox over the counter at a pharmacy."
"You are in deep need of a physician-grade prescription," he said. "The tri-ox sold over the counter is but a third of what your physiology needs in a 15-hour period."
"Oh." She was only using two of those shots a day, three at the most and that one extra injection was already past the recommended dosage on the box. Was he saying she could have been taking as much as six in a day? No wonder she could never get enough air!
"Something about your physiology- You will be one of those humans who will need to have some form of compression therapy. There is a harness that is built into a bodysuit that can be worn for a portion of the day to help your body acclimate better. You will wear it and slowly minimize the amount of time in the suit until your body begins to learn to keep up with Vulcan's gravity."
She looked encouraged then. "Really?"
"And I would like to temporarily prescribe you two other medications," he said as he began inputting things into his medi-PADD. "A small medication to help your heart function under the greater gravity which we will decrease slowly over time as you adapt as well as a light tranquilizer for those times you feel overwhelmed. I will also prescribe a specialty filter be added to your bedroom vent. It will supply you with additional oxygen while you sleep. Not an exorbitant amount, just enough so that you will sleep better. According to my scans of your brain, your mind has not been receiving enough oxygen, either. I am also going to send you to a counselor to help you learn to manage your schedule since the days are longer here."
She thought of how the household staff had so much to say about her erratic sleeping patterns. Maybe this was the reason? "Is that why I fall asleep at the wrong times?"
"There is no right or wrong time for a human adjusting to Vulcan to obtain rest. It is not unknown for non-Vulcans to also experience fluctuations in strong emotion; sometimes the emotions are quite aggressive in nature."
She thought that out as best she could. She did feel like she was operating on nothing but instinct. The feeling had been getting worse since she'd been there over two weeks. "Oh damn," she found herself saying under her breath.
"Pardon?"
"I have been-" she struggled to find the right word, "-unfair to my husband. That's the only word I can think of." She shook her head. "I've been mean, confrontational… unreasonable."
The healer looked at her for a moment and said not a word. Then he began with utmost delicacy, his tone careful, "Being in this state would significantly affect your mood, your behavior, even your thoughts. Say nothing more at this time. Once I have administered the initial doses of your medications here, you will feel a sharp change in your mood. I will go now to retrieve he who is your husband and then I will administer the extra medications. You shall remain here for a short time only, after that and then you may return home."
Shanna nodded as Healer Sonil left the room. She thought about the way she had been feeling. On edge. Angry. Perpetually defensive and upset. Was this due to Pressure Sickness as well as not getting enough oxygen to her brain? She lay back on the exam table and tried to think about it, but her mind seemed to be stuck on 'pause'.
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Siranon was nothing short of horrified. He only just controlling the outward display of his panic. "You are saying that my wife has been slowly suffocating these past weeks?" he asked carefully.
The Healer insisted, "Do not allow negative emotion to take root. She has not been permanently damaged. It was simply an inconvenience to her system to have to undertake so much change so quickly over such a span of time. We can slowly adapt her to her new environment now. She shall recover fully," said the Healer as he led Siranon back to his wife's room. "I shall return shortly with the initial dosages of her medications."
Siranon entered the room then and saw his wife lying back on the exam table. She sat up quickly when he entered. "No, please, lie back down, my wife."
She admitted to herself that she most certainly did not feel 100% and lay right back down. Then she admitted, "I'm sorry I've been paranoid and generally unpleasant. And that's the nicest way I can put that."
"Apparently it is a side-effect of oxygen deprivation and having increased pressure on your organs," said Siranon. "I was unaware of the need to gradually acclimate you to my planet. I am having the children checked at this time, as well."
She sat up even faster, then, "The babies!" She knew her mind was not operating fully, because it took someone else to remind her of the children!
"Children seem to adjust much more quickly than adult humans. We will change the filters on their bed chambers and slowly acclimate them, but they will need far less medication and tampering with than you shall, my wife."
She ran her hand over her very sleepy eyes and admitted. "I feel like I'm thinking through quicksand half the time. And all I feel is fear and anger."
He reached out his two fingers to her. His eyes were open and imploring. "Let me in."
It felt like such a heavy effort to force her fingers to his, but she did it. For the first time in weeks, she felt the hum of their bond envelop her. Her heart sped up and she felt even less able to breathe. She pulled her fingers away from his. "Too much."
The Healer walked into the room then. "Here are your initial injections. I have already ordered your medications and the harness incorporated into your bodysuit that you will need along with the instructions for each." He began injecting her, one after the other.
With each injection, Shanna couldn't believe the difference… after the first hypo, she found herself able to breathe a little easier, but the second hypo was the one that really made a difference. She no longer felt like something was sitting on her chest and her heart was no longer struggling to keep up. She took a true deep breath and looked around herself, unable to believe the way her mind was starting to clear that quickly. "Holy Hotsauce! I can think!"
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The next morning, Shanna awoke slowly. She realized that she was not only able to breathe, but she supposed it might have been the best sleep she'd obtained since arriving on the planet. She supposed that maybe she hadn't been able to get proper full sleep cycles. Perhaps her mind was not entering all of the phases of the sleep cycle. She knew that could wreak havoc on anyone.
She bathed quickly and then went out onto her and Siranon's private balcony since it was where he ordinarily spent his mornings.
He seemed startled when she walked out into Vulcan's morning sun. "My wife," he said as he stood quickly.
She looked closely at his face for the first time in weeks. Was she still angry with him? For some things, yes. But it was not the blind annoyance and anger she had been feeling since she'd touched down on the planet. "I hope I am not interrupting you," she said sheepishly as she looked away from him.
He shook his head and crossed to stand before her. He stopped himself just short of touching her. "I was unaware of the need to make certain you were properly adjusted if you were to remain here long term."
She shrugged. "I don't know why neither one of us knew. I mean, you'd think we would."
"In light of that, let us sit. I do not wish for you to be taxed." They both sat as he continued the conversation by saying, "Neither one of us are of the medical profession…" He noticed she was still not meeting his eyes. "Things have been said, my wife. And though you were unwell, I do believe the words spoken to me were honest. Were they not?"
She looked down at the ground and found tears stinging the backs of her eyes. She didn't have the heart to answer. She cleared her chest. "I was angry about a lot of things and…" She shook her head. "I just felt so much anger. I felt like I had to defend myself for everything all of the time. My memories aren't even in correct sequence for some things."
"This home- it does not feel like your home?" he asked. It was one of the things she had said that stayed with him. It bothered him immensely.
She looked away from him, embarrassed that she had said that the day before. "I never wanted to say something like that to you. I never wanted to say a lot of the things I've said to your face these past few weeks. I feel like I was someone else and-"
"But it is the way you truly feel, is it not?" he asked, not wanting her to talk her way out of the situation.
She sighed. Though she didn't want to, she nodded. "Yes, I did... I do."
"Your anger toward me concerning the way the staff spoke to you-"
"I was probably making wonky decisions because my brain was oxygen hungry. Of course they would express confusion at some of the things I did."
"I took the liberty this morning of gathering the staff. I told them of my failure to make certain you were acclimated to our world and the side-effects it had upon you."
She finally did look up at him, eyes wide. She was a tad bit horrified. "Oh no-"
"The older members of the staff were quite disappointed in me," he admitted. "I did not see to your health properly."
Shanna didn't even know what to say to that. "Well we're not medical personnel. How were we supposed to know this stuff? Amanda didn't say anything about any of this, and neither did Maya. Maybe they didn't have as hard a time as I did."
"Nevertheless, our staff is now aware that you are receiving the proper medical assistance. I did, however, make certain to tell them that they shall no longer question your diet, your waking or sleeping habits, how you care for our children, or what you decide to purchase for their rooms."
She looked over at him, surprised that he had done that for her. "Thank you," she found the words and pushed them out past the heavy emotion in her chest. "And I want to formally apologize for the way I treated you about Telvin-" The emotions in her chest became particularly difficult to keep down then. She fought back tears as she looked out over at the horizon. "He just- I suppose the old man grew on me."
"The way he chastised me when he thought perhaps I had been inappropriate with you," Siranon relived that memory with her. "It was more than obvious, to me at least, he was very fond of you, my wife."
She remembered Telvin's reaction when she'd decided to cut back to half days. He had not wanted any other assistant but her. "I loved that old man so much," she finally admitted as tears began to flow. She laughed a little then. "I seem destined to love difficult men."
Siranon knew she was referencing her relationship not only with Telvin, but also her own father. He couldn't help but observe, "I, too, can be difficult. I am aware of that."
She shook her head. "No. You are not that difficult... especially not in comparison with my father or Telvin."
"Even my shameful reaction to a motherless boy?" he said as he looked over at Shanna. There was open vulnerability in his eyes. He was ready for whatever she needed to say.
She studied his repentant face in the red light of morning. Though they had had somewhat of a tentative truce on the matter of Lewis, he was now truly sorry over his reaction. And after so many weeks of being angry with him, she couldn't find it in herself to do anything more than to reassure him, "I love the boy, not his father. Do you understand that now?" she asked softly.
He nodded. "I understand fully."
"Do you understand that even if it's from afar, I have to be his mother while he needs me to be that for him?"
Siranon nodded. "Yes. I understand and I approve. He was, after all, the first child in your heart even before Ananda and Henry. It is not in you to casually cast off a child or anyone that you possess a strict loyalty for. It is what makes you admirable in so many ways."
She sighed with something that felt like relief. And then Siranon's fingers were being held out at her again. She grasped them eagerly, ready to cement their newly patched up union.
The moment their fingers made contact, Shanna could feel Siranon's overpowering hunger for her. She had no clue! He had been putting up a front of coldness while she had been angry toward him. But deep on the inside, he was scarred and bruised, eager for things to return to how they had been. "You poor thing," she found herself whispering as she looked at him, the hum of their repaired bond zinging back and forth between them. "I apologize sincerely for all of the terrible things I said to you."
He was the one finding it difficult to breathe then. "I apologize for my allowing instinct to take over in my reaction to your first child. I shall not do so again."
She was aware of the time, then. She stood as she quickly removed her fingers from his. She had only just come back to herself. She did not want to put any demands on him so quickly. "You must go to that meeting this morning, I know."
He was also standing, but for a different reason. His hands were on the sides of her face and his lips found his way to hers, gently at first, but then heated. "It is not for over an hour," he said quickly as his hands roamed down her body and pulled her in closer.
The heightened emotions between the two of them, the way his hands were eagerly pulling her in to his warmth. "There will not be enough time," she tried to warn him, but continued kissing him nonetheless.
"Then they shall wait," he said as he looked down into the steely grey of her eyes and let the intensity of his true want wash over them both. "Ashel-veh," he said, most seductively, but full of feeling, want… the way he ended the word, it was almost like he was imploring her for something more… and then he did, "Please, wife, allow me to give you-"
She wrenched down the very top of his robe while he was still speaking and practically bit into his chest.
He made a sound deep in his throat she hadn't heard from him in quite some time as he lifted her and carried her back into their bedroom.
He was half an hour late to his meeting that day.
a/n - The next chapter has also already been written. I just need to seriously proofread it. I hope to upload it by Friday. - J. S.