Here it is: THE EPILOGUE (P.S. it's extra long because I made you wait two weeks)
*seven years later*
"Mommy?" Lena asks just as I'm walking out of her room. Once she grew out of her crib, we moved Lena into one of the smaller rooms across the hall from us. It was just big enough for a small twin mattress and a tiny nightstand. Freedom used to live in there, but now that he's older, he stays in his brother's room. I don't like having Lena in a separate room—away from me—but Ian and I need some privacy.
"Yes, honey?" I reply turning around and leaning against the door. She's sitting up in her bed now, the covers crumpled around her feet. Her wavy, brown hair swayed at the edge of her shoulders, still damp from the washroom. Her eyes, shimmering silver in the dim light, were wide and big, the same shape as Ian's.
"Will you tell me now?" she asks, her voice quiet, fearful. She looks down at her stuffed bunny—a gift from Mel and Jared from her last birthday. She plays with its ears while she awaits my answer.
I suck in a deep breath, knowing I should've expected this question. I walk back over to her bed and smooth out the blankets on the end, then take a seat. Lena's looking at me again with her wide eyes, hopeful that I'll finally answer.
"Lena, this is something your father should be here for," I explain. Ian's out on a quick raid with Jared and Fords to get more medicine. He left two days ago and should be back tonight, but I'm hoping Lena won't remember that. She'll only wait up until she gets the answers she wants.
"Fine, then I'll wait till he gets home tonight," Lena smiles, squinting her eyes. Of course she would remember. I sigh and shake my head.
"He's not going to be back till very late, sweetie. And I don't think he'll want to talk about it this late at night. It's a long story," I tell her, hoping this will convince her. Ian and I have been putting off telling Lena about our apocalyptic, war stricken world. She knows something's weird about how we live—how we always go on raids, how our foods fairly simple, the small amount of people that live her, our confinement to the cave barriers. She's known it for a long time, but we've refused to tell her until she was old enough to be able to understand it all.
Though only seven years old, Lena's very smart for her age. Ian wants to tell her; he wants to be able to be honest about this with her. I do, too, but I'm afraid of what she'll think of me. If she'll judge me or not. Think of me as an alien intruder, not her human mother.
"But Daddy said I'm old enough now!" she wines, batting her eyelashes and pouting her lips. The lines of her face are sharp, like Ian's, but when she makes that face, the edges soften and round out. "I want to know the truth, Mommy. Please," she begs, leaning forward on the bed.
"I don't kn—"
"I think it's about time we told her, Wanda," somebody says from behind me. I whirl around to see Ian standing in the doorway, his clothes dirty and his hair a mess. But he's beautiful all the same; leaning there in the pale, cave light.
"Ian," I gasp, standing up. "You're back!" I smile and run over to him, wrapping my arms around him. He hugs me back, kisses the top of my head. I hadn't expected him to be home so early—it couldn't be later than eight o'clock, nine maybe. But here he is, hugging me tightly and smiling down at me.
"Of course I am," he laughs. Ever since Lena was born, we rarely go on raids together anymore. Only a couple of times we'll go—when we're both needed. Whenever one of us does go on a raid, the other is worried sick at home for the few days that they're gone. Even though I know Ian is smart enough to stay safe, every hour waiting for him is like agony. "And how's our little girl?"
He pulls away and heads over to Lena, leaning down and lifting her up off the bed. He spins her around in the air and she screams with excitement. Then he lowers her down and kisses her on the forehead. "Daddy, stop!" she laughs, squirming in his arms. He sets her down gently on the bed. "Will you tell me now?" she asks immediately after hitting the mattress.
Ian gives me a look, hopeful but concerning at the same time. He's willing to wait until I'm ready if he has to. But his eyes, so blue and so perfect, guilt me into it. I have no choice but to nod my head and walk over to Lena's bed.
I sit down gingerly on the edge and Ian does the same on the other side, Lena's legs sandwiched in-between us. Ian takes my hand and gives it a tight squeeze, letting me know that he's here for me. No matter what Lena might think of me after this talk is over.
"Lena, I want you to know that we only kept this from you for so long because it's very complicated and hard to understand. It's okay if you don't get it all right now. But we want you to at least know why we live here in the caves," I start. Lena rolls her eyes, having expected this introduction, and pulls her bunny to her chest.
"A few years ago, before you were born, our planet was invaded by a group of . . . aliens called Souls." Ian gives me a look, telling me silently that he doesn't like my word choices, but I continue anyway. "We—they take over human bodies in order to live themselves. When they came to Earth, the humans tried to rest against them, to fight back. But the Souls were too powerful. They quickly populated most of the planet, took over everything the human's had made."
Ian's looking away at a spot on the wall, trying hard not to listen to my words. He hates it when I tell the story like I'm the enemy—but how else do I tell it?
"What do you mean? How did they take over people?" Lena asks, her eyebrows furrowed together, making her look even more like Ian.
I take a deep breath and look down at my hands, avoiding her eyes though I know it would help her understand better, make her listen. "The Souls are very small, Lena. The size of bugs. Once they get inside a human body, they attach themselves to the brain of the human, all of its nerves. They then have control over the body—basically become that person but with a different mind," I explain.
"So if I was a Soul, I could become Daddy and make him do all sorts of funny stuff?" she wonders, grinning.
Ian laughs at that and shakes his head. "I guess you could, sweetie. But that's not really the point," he sighs. "The Souls can only live when they're in a body. So they insert themselves into humans in order to have a life."
"Oh," she says, as if it's that simple. We haven't even gotten to the complicated part yet.
It's quiet for a moment as I think of what to say next. Which direction to go in, where to start exactly. But Lena interrupts me before I can continue. "What happens to the human?"
I suck in a sharp breath. I wasn't expecting her to ask that. Ian shares a look of concern but he knows that it'd be better if I explained. "Well, sometimes the human's mind disappears."
"Forever?"
I nod grimly. Lena's face sinks. "But, in other cases, the human's consciousness is strong enough that it survives and lives inside of its body with the Soul." I could end this conversation here, but I decide I might as well get to the hard part. She'll have to find out eventually. "That's how it was with your Aunt Mel."
"What?" she shrieks completely shocked. "Aunt Mel was taken by a Soul?"
Ian takes a shaky breath and rubs my back gently. I can tell he wants to talk, to try to make this easier for me, but I shake my head subtly and take a deep breath. "Yes. Lena, this is the hard part, okay? Are you sure you're ready for this?" I'm hoping she changed her mind, that that was enough information for one day. But no, our daughter just nods her head eagerly.
"Lena, honey . . . I took over Aunt Mel's body a long time ago." I don't say it directly, but she picks up on the hidden message: that I'm a Soul. Her eyes widen, maybe in fear, and her mouth drops open slightly. Then she squints and looks between Ian and I, confused.
"What do you mean, Mom? You . . . you're a Soul? But that doesn't make any sense!" she cries, frustrated. Her little brain is trying to process this, but it's too much.
I reach out for her arm and wrap my hand around it, stroking my thumb across her soft skin. "It's okay, sweetie. I know it's hard to believe, but I'm not from here. I'm from another planet, Lena. I came to Earth years ago and was put into Aunt Melanie's body. She was still alive inside of my, or our, head, though. And she led me here, to the caves. To her family—Uncle Jared and Uncle Jamie; Jeb, Sharon and Maggie. And I fell in love with the humans, Lena. With the caves and the lifestyle and the people. I love so many people here, darling." I almost choke on the words. I can feel Ian's arm, now wrapped around me tight, like a comforting blanket. He rubs me gingerly, steadying me. Lena stares up at me with wondering eyes.
"But I didn't think I could stay here. I needed to give Aunt Mel her life back. So I left—told Doc to . . . send me to another planet," I lie. She's too young to know that I told him to kill me, to bury me. She doesn't have to know that right now—or ever for that matter. "But your father and Aunt Mel brought me back. They saved me and reinserted me into another body so that I could stay here with them. Does that make sense?"
Lena's eyes are full of water, though I don't know what the tears are from. Is she scared of me? Mad? Worried? Or is she purely confused, not really comprehending any of this? "But if you're a Soul . . . then that means that you took over Earth." She doesn't say it accusingly, just matter-of-factly.
"Yes—"
"No," Ian interrupts. "Your mother had no part in that. Other Souls did that, meaner ones. But your mother is the kindest person in the whole universe and she never meant to hurt any humans. She's helped everybody in the caves survive so long. She cares about us more than I could possibly dream of, sacrificed her old life just to satisfy us. She's not the enemy, Lena."
"Well, of course not!" Lena laughs, as if this is some joke. "How could Mommy ever be the bad guy? It's not her fault she's from another planet!"
My mouth drops open at the words coming out of her mouth. My little Lena, so young yet so knowledgeable; speaking some of the wisest words I've heard about Souls.
"That's right!" Ian agrees, grinning. He pats her head and messes up her hair, making her laugh.
"And what planet are you from, Mommy?" Lena asks excitedly, rising up on her knees so that she's level with me.
I choke out a laugh, so relieved that she's not scared of me. That she's not mad. "It's called the Origin. It's very far away," I smile.
"Can I go there one day?" she asks excitedly.
"I'm afraid that's not possible, sweat pea," Ian shrugs. "It'd take years and years to get there. You'd be an old lady by the time you got there." He's grinning ear to ear, but Lena's face shows no humor.
"But then how did Mommy get her? She's not an old lady," Lena points out.
"Technically, I am," I respond. "I've been to nine planets, Lena. I've stayed on each one for many years, multiple lifetimes. I'm thousands of years old, though this body is much younger."
"WHAT?" she gulps. "Oh my gosh, that's so cool!" She stands up on the bed with excitement, but Ian pulls her back down into a sitting position.
"I guess it is," I laugh, taking her hand in mine. "Lena, are you sure you understand all of this? Does it make sense to you?"
She nods enthusiastically, looking between Ian and I with a newfound curiosity. She studies us for a moment before opening her mouth to speak again. I let her talk, anxious to be the one answering the questions rather than feeding her random information. This was much easier. "How do I know you're really a Soul? What if this is a joke?" She narrows her eyes at me and keeps a calm composure. Of course she'd assume this was a trick; Jared's always messing with her mind when he sees her.
"All Souls have the same eyes," I say, pointing to my silver-rimmed irises.
She takes in this fact and then realization dawns upon her, her head perking up as if someone pulled a string from the top of her head. "Miss Sunny and Doctor Fords both have the same eyes! Are they Souls, too?"
"Yes, they are," Ian says, smiling proudly at our smart, little daughter. Who would've thought she'd understand all this, take this so well? "Sunny was inside of your Aunt Jodi when she first got here. And Fords is here to help with the medical stuff. They both love humans just as much as your mother does. They're on our side," he tells her, winking.
She bites her lip, processing the information and then seems to have yet another epiphany. "Mommy . . . how come I have eyes like yours? I'm not a Soul, am I?" Her voice is laced with fear and I finally get the slightest feeling that some of this scares her. Though she seems fine with the idea of her mother being a Soul, being a Soul herself seems to alarm her slightly.
"No, Lena, but because I am a Soul, part of me is in your blood, making you just a teensy-bit Soul," I inform her. She doesn't seem scared by this, though, just a little curious. "You're human, Lena. But you have my eyes, that's for sure."
A few moments go by in silence as Lena seems to go through the whole story in her mind. There's so much more to tell her, but they'll save that for another day. This was enough information to have to get used to. "Are you okay, sweetie? I know it's a lot to take in. But we'll help you understand it, I promise. If you have an questions at all. If you get scared about anything, just tell us. We love you, Lena. We just wanted you to know the truth, okay?" I tell her, leaning in close.
She nods her head and we get off of the bed. I quickly make her bed, tucking her beneath the blankets and sealing her in a bundle of warmth, just her head peaking out, resting on a gentle pillow. Ian kisses her lightly on the forehead before heading outside of the room. I lean over and do the same, the brush a stray strand of hair aside from her face. "I love you, Lena of the Stars. Don't forget that."
She looks up at my eyes, visible easily in the dark light. "I love you too, Mommy." With that, she closes her eyes and curls into a ball, falling asleep quicker than I thought possible. I close her door silently and head back to our room, where Ian's waiting for me. He's already under the covers, his chest bare and his arms stretched wide across both of our pillows. I roll my eyes at him.
"That went well," he says simply.
"She doesn't hate me," I murmur, more to myself. I'm so overcome with joy. My daughter loves me despite the fact that I'm from an alien species, one that ruined her race, her planet. She still loves me.
"Wanda, of course she loves you. You're her mother," he says. He's smiling wide, just as relieved about the conversation as I am. He raises his eyebrows at me and I walk over the bed. I quickly strip my jeans and sweater off, then climb into bed. Ian immediately wraps his arms around me from behind, warming me up.
"I still can't believe this is real," I murmur, staring ahead at the purple cave walls.
"What?" Ian asks, taken aback. He twists me around so that we're facing each other, his arms still tied tight around me. I wrap one of my legs around his, latching onto him, and lean into his chest.
"All of it. I mean ever since that raid when Pet . . . when Petals died, everything's changed. I got a new body. Fords joined us. Jodi came back. Mel and Jared got married. We made a family." I take a deep breath. "We have a family, Ian. And our daughter loves us despite what I am. Everything's just so impossibly perfect. I can't believe it's all real. I feel like I'm going to wake up . . . like this is all one huge dream."
Ian strokes my back, his fingers tickling my bare skin. "It's real, Wanda. It's all beautifully real." He tilts my head up and looks me in the eyes. Smiles. Then he kisses me gently on the lips, sending a flash of heat through my body. I arch my back and lean closer to him, kissing him harder, more ferociously, trying to assure that he's here, that he's real.
His arms snake up to my neck and encircle me. He then rolls us over so that I'm under him and he's straddling me, holding himself above me and kissing me again. I close my eyes and enjoy the soft taste of his lips, the familiar scent of his skin. It all feels so wonderful. My insides ache for him.
After a long time, we finally stop to catch our breaths. My head hits the pillow fast and I realize how tired I am. Ian sense my fatigue and curls his arms around me, his arm serving as a second pillow. I rest against him and close my eyes, lulled to sleep by the steady sound of his breathing.
I fall asleep knowing that my ninth and final life has been, and will be, the most inexplicably perfect.
~ The End ~
AUTHOR'S NOTE
Thank you so much to everyone who read and reviewed this story! I'm glad so many people enjoyed it. It made me happy to read all of your thoughts on the story and know that I was (at least I think) writing a good story. If you have any Host related requests (or any books in general) let me know and I'll see if I'll write one. Would you guys want a sequel to this fic set in the future? Like when Lena is 16ish? Let me know. If not, I'll move on! THANKS SO MUCH AGAIN! LOVE YOU ALL :)