Thirty Seven: We need a plan…

"Yer tricked us!" Mildew's accusation was whining and furious. The pirate was sneering, his staff waving fiercely and face ugly with anger. His man, Olav, was standing belligerently at his side, his hand on his sword. Beside him, Cami was scarcely less angry, her pretty face twisted in a scowl of anger, blue eyes flashing in fury at the trick she had suspected…but not completely understood. Not only had they been given the run-around…they had been given the run-around to a completely useless location while Fury and his friends had sneaked into the real lair and retrieved the weapon. And they were footsore, muddy and covered in scratches from the patch of brambles Tuff had deliberately got them stuck in. Mildew still had a pine cone sticking out of his hair which no one had bothered to tell him about.

"Yeah, about that…" Hiccup's voice was calm as he lounged on a chair on the deck, his son sitting at his feet sketching and a cup of ale comfortably in his hand. He had shed his armour, sword and scarf and looked like the young and very battered man that he was. Cami's eyes narrowed: she had almost forgotten that he was so young because in terms of sarcasm and daring, he was about a hundred years old but he was young and attractive with his messy auburn hair, lifted in the breeze and sparkling emerald eyes. She scowled.

"I'm waiting…lover…" she challenged him.

"I am not…" he bit back and then stopped himself. It was wasted effort. "But it's irrelevant anyway. I didn't want you there so you were sent elsewhere." Cami froze.

"You played us?" she hissed.

"Not so much fun when it happens to you, is it?" he asked smugly, sipping his ale. There was the metallic scrape as she drew her sword a few inches and Hiccup flicked his green eyes up. "One more inch, Cami, and no matter what our past, I will kill you," he said very coldly. She froze and stared at him, slowly sliding the sword back in the sheath, recalling the absolute fury in his voice when they had talked before-and the conviction that he would have followed through with his threats. Instead, she lunged forward and slapped him hard across the cheek. He winced.

"We're here on Viggo's behalf!" she hissed. "

"And yer oughta treat us like yer honoured guests!" Mildew sneered.

"Only when you behave like honoured guests," Hiccup snapped back, his eyes flashing. The crew were standing behind him, arms folded and various uncompromising expressions on their faces. Tuff was just pulling a face until his sister smacked him round the back of the head. "At the moment, you're both-frankly-pains in the butt. Viggo insisted I took someone but I am the Captain of the Night Fury and my word here is law. So if I say you aren't coming, you don't."

"Only if yer wants Viggo allying with Drago against yer!" Mildew threatened.

"That I very much doubt!" Hiccup scoffed. "Drago loathes pirates and would rather see you all dead than allies. Viggo will do what is best for Viggo when the time comes-and whether that is fighting with Berk or running away, it won't be allying with the Lord of the North!" Cami frowned.

"Viggo wanted reliable allies to watch you," she reminded him sternly.

"Yeah…because he's so trustworthy," he replied sarcastically.

"While I'm afraid I can't trust you, lover," she told him coolly.

"Really? I learned my lesson about trusting you two years ago, Cami-when I ended betrayed and condemned in a Meathead prison gang," Hiccup retorted icily. "I'll tell you what I deem you need to know and won't hesitate to conceal what you don't. I don't trust either of you not to sabotage my mission."

"I'm insulted," Mildew wheezed.

"Be grateful you're still on the ship," Hiccup told him brutally. "You left my crew to die on Dragon Island. I should have pitched you to the dragon there and then." He sat up straighter and glared at the two Captains. "Don't assume I am tolerating you for any reason other than Viggo's request. But also don't forget a Captain is the absolute master of his ship and if I suspect treachery or sabotage, you can go feed to sharks!" Cami gripped Mildew's shoulder and dragged him back before he could irritate Hiccup any further. Deliberately quashing her irritation, she flashed a brilliant grin at the taut shape of 'Captain Fury'.

"You know you can't resist all this…sexiness," she smirked and sashayed away. "No matter what your frigid bitch says, you know you'll come crawling to me…sooner or later…" Then, as she retreated, she still had time to trail a finger across Snotlout's chest and flutter her eyelashes. "Well, hello, beefcake!" she purred as she vanished belowdecks. Snotlout looked after her with a mildly dopey expression and Hiccup groaned.

"Don't, Snot," he warned. "Just…don't…"

"And why not?" he snapped. "Jealous she sees me as a potential…"

"Pawn," Hiccup said too quickly. " Cami likes to play men off. I've experienced it. Just…be wary around her. I'm no competition, Snot. I just don't want you to get hurt by her…" And he sighed as Snotlout glared at him. "Just remember that she is trying to divide us, Snot! Be wary what she says because the only person she truly cares for is Cami." Forcing himself to consider the words, Snotlout gave a small nod then turned away. Astrid's hand landed on his shoulder and he leaned back against her, closing his eyes. "This is only going to get rougher, Milady. We've been on Meathead but I am a wanted man there. And then…" His voice trailed away and she hugged him carefully from behind, her arms crossing over his chest and resting her chin on his shoulder.

"We'll deal with that when we need to," she said softly, ghosting a kiss onto his cheek. "WE have the first weapon and we're under sail for the second. Snot knowns you're looking out for him…and that Cami is a treacherous snake!" With a sigh, Hiccup absently rubbed his sore side.

"Yeah…but men only tend to find that out too late, after she's sunk her venom into them," he said.

oOo

Meathead Island came into sight, lumpy and larger than Berk with a busy harbour. The Meatheads still traded in slaves and Hiccup averted his eyes as they tacked past a slave-ship. The Night Fury had swapped for her white sails and appeared like a normal ship as she calmly sailed to moor at the cheap end of the port. Watching the mooring lines fastened to the dock, Hiccup smiled and went back to his cabin. He was already dressed in anonymous brown cap, shirt and leggings and ready to go when Cami and Mildew stormed in and demanded what the plan was now.

"Shore leave," he grinned. "We need to restock and reconnoitre." Cami moved forward and instantly slipped her arm through his-and he had to shake her off and back away.

"Aww, lover boy-doesn't this bring back memories?" she teased him. He gulped and backed away another step.

"Actually yes-but not really ones I want to revisit," he murmured. "You know…being framed for something you stole…being convicted without trial…sent to a Meathead prison and chained to do hard labour…happy days…not!" He straightened up. "Maybe you should be a little more…circumspect…when you're touring the port…"

"Me? I'm always the model of propriety…and I think Snotlout will be taking me on the tour," she purred. "He's such a nice young man. And I think maybe he might like a little variety in his life…maybe some excitement." She winked. "And I can be so very exciting…"

"Cami…I will say this only once," Hiccup breathed. "Snotlout is my cousin and one of very few people on Midgard that I care for. So if you hurt him, Camicazi, I will chase you to the ends of this planet to make you pay. Is that clear?" With a toss of her long blonde hair, she turned away.

"We'll see," she said, flouncing out. Mildew folded his arms.

"Yer may wanna get into her breeches, lad-don't worry, I won't tell yer girl-but that ain't gonna find the weapon," he sneered. "Mebbe yer should put more effort inter finding the cannon than into flirtin' with 'er!" Hiccup's eyes narrowed as Arild opened the door. The boy looked between the two men and then he backed away, closing the door quietly.

"What makes you think I don't already have that in hand?" Hiccup asked him calmly and the old man stared at him for a long moment, then screamed in exasperation and slammed out the door, almost knocking Arild over. The boy looked up at him, then he blinked and timidly walked back into the cabin.

"Er…hi, Dad," he said quietly. "Are you okay?" Fists clenched and breathing hard, Hiccup forced himself to calm down. He gave a nod.

"That man is so irritating!" Hiccup ground out through his teeth. "He's like this nagging voice pecking away…" Arild frowned, not wholly understanding. Then, with a juddering sigh, Hiccup relaxed. He held his hand out to the boy. "What d'you say, bud? Shall we pick up Mom and go ashore? Have a cheeky look around without the guards knowing?" Bright green eyes widened in delight and a gappy smile flashed up at the pirate.

"Yeah!" the boy said. "And could I have one of those roast boar sandwiches again?"

oOo

They met Fishlegs and Sven in the same tavern where they had regrouped before sinking the two Jorgensen shipping vessels in the harbour. On the way up after buying Arild his huge sandwich and quietly noting guard numbers, Hiccup told Astrid about the whole mission and the way the whole crew had joined in to help him get his revenge.

"So, let me get this straight-you let them beat you up so you could see how many men were on the ships?" she asked him. He nodded.

"Um…yeah? It wasn't as bad as it sounds," Hiccup protested, his arm chivalrously hooked through hers.

"Um…yeah, it was," Arild piped up, munching.

"Don't speak with your mouth full!" Hiccup told him quickly.

"And then you went back onto the ship in a lame disguise so you could in person rob and sink the boats?"

"Only one of them," Hiccup protested. "Fishlegs did the other one!"

"What lame disguise was it anyway?" Astrid asked him, cocking an eyebrow.

"Um…beard…" Hiccup mumbled.

"WHAT?"

"It was really awful, Mom," Arild mumbled, spraying crumbs. "It was all hairy and made from all the crew's hair…" Astrid just gaped as Hiccup face palmed and hung his head.

"Um…yeah," he admitted, his cheeks warming.

"Are you blushing?"

"Yeah…well, you didn't see the beard…"

"Hmm…I can imagine…a nice, manicured, neat little…"

"Huge bird's nest," Hiccup mumbled. "And I got a rash from it…"

"Oh Gods, I really gotta see this…I wonder if Fish…"

"…and we're here!" Hiccup interjected gratefully, thanking Thor and Odin that they had reached the inn. They slid in, ordered a couple of meads and joined their crew-mates at the table. Hiding behind their meads, Fishlegs was looking nervous and Sven just looked fed up. "Enjoying your shore leave?" the Captain asked.

"I would be…if I hadn't spent most of it surrounded by books!" Sven grumbled.

"Turns out Wrinkley actually came from Meathead and bequeathed many of his belongings here after his death…" Fishlegs reported. Hiccup frowned and looked more closely at him.

"Don't tell me," he said in a suddenly depressed voice. "The weapon is among them?"

"Meathead doesn't have a typical dragon and no obvious nesting sites or caves that could conceal it so…I guess it will be among his devices and inventions," Fishlegs explained.

"And those are…?" Hiccup asked, guessing the answer and hoping he was wrong.

"In the Meathead Library."

There was a long pause as everyone processed the information.

"So, you're telling me that the second weapon is probably in a secure and revered display in the most secure location on this Island?" Hiccup said very carefully. "A location so secure that most tribes would give their firstborn sons to possess. More secure than most gold depositories?"

"Urm…yes?" Fishlegs squeaked. "But we have actually seen the display…"

"And?"

"Nothing there actually looks like a cannon," Sven commented with an arch of his bushy eyebrow as he downed his mead.

"Which doesn't mean a thing," Astrid guessed. "It may be that the object we want just isn't on display…"

"No, everything was on display," Fishlegs said heavily. Staring hard at his earthenware mug, Hiccup took another sip of his mead.

"Then we just have to pull off the heist of our career," the Captain said. "Any questions?"

"I have one," Astrid said, her eyes narrowing. "What do we do about Cami and Mildew?" Stealing a small corner of Arild's sandwich, Hiccup chewed thoughtfully.

"Leave them to me," he said softly. "I think they can be very helpful…"

oOo

Captain Mildew and Olav made their way to the main administrative office of the port and were shown in. The old pirate leered at the pudgy and very hairy administrator as the man shuffled his papers and eyed the men facing him.

"Nice place yer got 'ere," Mildew noted, attempting some friendly conversation. His tone, though, sounded very snide. The administrator grunted, straightening his brown tunic as he made a note on the parchment.

"What can I do for you, Mr Mildew?" he asked calmly. The pirate scowled.

"I may 'ave some information fer yer," he said sharply. "There's a man 'ere who is a criminal, who escaped from yer prison a couple of years back." The man sat up. "Tall, skinny, red hair…'e's a criminal a deserves to pay 'is debt properly…"

"Where did you see him?" the administrator asked, his eyes narrowing. Shuffling in his seat, Mildew gave a small unpleasant smile.

"Down by the docks," he reported, trying to look innocent. "I over'eard 'im calling 'imself 'Fury'…" The administrator inclined his head and fashioned a very suspicious smile. The man opposite him looked like a pirate and he was tempted to take the intelligence with a pinch of salt…if it wasn't for the fact that such a man was wanted for escape from prison…and also matched the description of a man seen when the two Jorgensen vessels were destroyed in the docks.

"Thank you, citizen," he said, scribbling a note and handing it to his assistant. "The guards will go looking for him immediately…"

"Well…we can all sleep safer in us beds," Mildew leered with an unsettling smile. "Thank yer…er…I don't s'pose there's any reward I got get for this 'elp I've given yer…?" Eyes flicking up sharply, the administrator scowled causing Mildew to scramble up and leave swiftly. He was muttering irritably about 'Cheapskates' as they stomped out before turning to Olav as they got out onto the road.

"Let's see Fury get outta that one!" he sneered.

oOo

Hiccup felt seriously uncomfortable and exposed as he stepped onto the dock for the second time. Gone were his armour and scarf, his mask against the world and he was stepping onto Meathead Island this time dressed in a smart rust tunic with a white shirt, smart black leggings and polished brown boots with his sword belt firm around his waist and sword on his right hip. Although he knew he was looking just like a normal man, he shuffled in self-conscious discomfort, anxious for his safety-and that of his family. Arild was fidgeting in excitement at his side, pulling away from his firm grasp, in a fresh green tunic and leggings he had already managed to get mud on…and then both froze as Astrid arrived, walking elegantly down the gangplank to stand by Hiccup's side, her hair braided over one shoulder and a small white fur shawl over her shoulders. A long, deep blue dress sheathed her slim form with the skirt swirling around her booted ankles as she took Hiccup's arm and reached up to place a finger in his chin, playfully closing his gaping mouth.

"Morning, babe," she smirked as his emerald eyes twinkled in an appreciative grin.

"Um…wow…" he murmured, still staring. She burst out laughing.

"Oh great," she giggled. "The suave Captain has completely lost the power of speech!" Visibly shaking himself, he took her hand and raised it to his lips.

"Milady, you look ravishing," he smirked.

"Charmer!" she shot back as Arild made a vomiting noise. Hiccup nudged him surreptitiously.

"Gimme a break, bud," he hissed out of the corner of his mouth, causing both Astrid and the boy to smile. "I might be in with a chance with this gorgeous lady…" Astrid pressed against him, staring up into his playful expression and her own lips quirked as she replied.

"That's lucky…because I really fancy this lanky, sarcastic ginger…"

"Am NOT ginger!"

"Okay…auburn…"

"Reddish brown…"

"Same thing…"

"Really…?"

"Dad…can we go now?" Arild whined, bored by the verbal sparring and desperate to explore. Hiccup stole a quick kiss, his lips brushing Astrid's tantalisingly, then turned to his son.

"Okay, bud…let's go exploring…" he said, offering her his arm and moving along the docks as a family. It was really the first time he had stepped out with them and he was partly delighted and dizzy with astonishment and partly on edge because he really had something to lose. Arild was scampering around, exploring every single store and not moving at anything slower than a run, his quick green eyes taking in every sight. Walking slightly more sedately, Hiccup and Astrid kept a close eye on the boy while Astrid efficiently purchased a few herbs and salves she thought she would need, especially with Hiccup's propensity for getting himself injured. She had finished her purchase and glanced up, seeing him snaring the boy and lifting him in his arms, wincing slightly as he pulled his stitches, but the boy automatically wrapped his arms around the man and nuzzled him. Underneath everything, he was still her Hiccup, the caring, inquisitive, brave boy she knew.

"How much for this?" she asked, lifting a bronze silk scarf?" The vendor gave an outrageous sum and she haggled spiritedly until they clasped hands. Nodding in victory, she grasped her purchase and sashayed over to the pirate, beckoning him over and carefully winding the scarf around his throat, neatly tying the silk at his throat. It concealed the weal from where he had been hanged and completed his outfit. He raised a hand to gently touch the gift.

"Thank you, Milady," he murmured, smiling. "Hmm…you're determined to turn me into a gentleman…"

"Gods, no," she smiled. "I prefer a pirate…"

"YOU! HOLD!" a voice shouted and all three turned-to see a dozen guards closing on them. Hiccup's eyes widened for a second, before the green depths hardened and his hand dropped to the hilt of his sword, pushing Astrid-who was unarmed-behind him.

"How can I help you?" he snapped, his face cold. He was breathing heavily and Astrid grabbed his wrist tightly, restraining him. Arild hid against her skirts, green eyes timidly flicking up to inspect the guards them hiding against the silk.

"You are under arrest!" the head guard said.

oOo

"Dude-I cannot believe you want us to do some reading!" Tuffnut protested.

"Like…while we're alive?" Ruff added, her eyes wide with a plea. "C'mon, Fish! You know we hate reading…"

"And yet the Meathead Library has the finest selection of books on munitions and ballistics in the Archipelago!" Fishlegs said superiorly.

"Ballistics?" Tuff repeated suspiciously

"Something to do with sticky balls," Ruff told him confidently.

"Ooo…I seriously want to see that!" Tuff replied, his face lightning up. "I want sticky balls…or do I?" Sharing a glance with Sven, Fishlegs rolled his eyes and then shook his head.

"No, Tuff, I really think you don't," he sighed. "But Ballistics is is the scientific study of being fired on a bullet…or a cannon ball…" The twins shared a look.

"Okay, maestro-lead me to the library!" Tuff said pompously, twirling his cane and starting off at top speed-in completely the wrong direction. Ruff sniggered.

"He'll catch up…but seriously, you may have sold me on reading," she grinned and grabbed the First Mate's hand. His eyes popped wide and he squeaked an incoherent protest. She looked at him. "C'mon, big boy…you can even count this as a date!" she promised. He gave a slow smile.

"In that case…it's this way!" he said more firmly and closed his hand warmly around hers, leading her up the hill. Sven grumbled under his breath. Going out with the twins was bad enough but going out as wingman on a date with Ruffnut and Fishlegs? He really really needed to find a new ship!

oOo

Snotlout was thoroughly enjoying his date with Camicazi, despite-or maybe because-she was utterly different to anyone he had ever met. Admittedly, she was mildly crazy, completely fearless and moderately amoral and self-serving but she was fun, witty and very beautiful, in a confident and sexually provocative way. The way she held herself, the way she spoke was all bent towards getting him to fall of her and though he knew intellectually what she was doing, his inner stud was preening at her attention and enjoying being-effectively-wooed.

She had changed into a dress of deep teal, a fur cloak around her shoulders and elegant gold locket at her throat. He knew for a fact that she had four knives concealed about her person-just in case-and had made an effort to pile her hair up on her head in a fashionable roll. They had already shared a small meal in a very fashionable inn and were now taking the air, strolling down through the market. Snotlout had answered her questions about his home but she was quite coy about answering any questions about her home or family and his instincts were roused.

"So why are you so Hel-bent in chasing Fury?" he asked her and she stalled for a moment, her blue eyes sweeping across the various tabes laden with goods.

"Because I didn't finish with him," she said simply. "So he's still mine."

"You had a chance when he was with Heather, didn't you?" Snotlout pointed out.

"But he was unhappy then-anyone could see that," she told him as if it was obvious. "Now…he's not. So I want him back."

"So you can end it," Snotlout assumed.

"Or keep him…" she murmured.

"Er…hello…man on a date with you here?" Snotlout reminded her. She blinked, then grinned.

"Nah…I'm joking. He's too sarcastic and whiny…" Leaning closer to her, the man frowned.

"Camicazi…he's my cousin and while he is an outlaw and a pirate, he's not had an easy time," he said in a low voice. "I don't want him hurt any more." She stared at him and read genuine concern and determination in the blue eyes. Snotlout was a little vain, self-confident and brash but there was definitely a good guy under there…and she wondered what it would be like to actually have someone caring and worried about her.

"As you say…we're on a date and shouldn't be talking about my ex," she reminded him, smiling confidently and leading them down the hill. To her surprise, they almost ran smack bang into Hiccup…who was standing with Astrid and Arild, surrounded by Meathead guards. Snotlout made to lurch forward to his cousin's defence but Cami dragged him back quickly, hissing a warning in his ear. "We're really outnumbered and this is their island. See what they have to say before getting us all killed!"

Breathing hard, his eyes never leaving his cousin, Snotlout nodded once and attentively slipped his arm through hers, a hand discreetly accepting the knife she passed him.

"On what charges?" Hiccup asked gruffly, keeping his body angled between his family and the guards. His emerald gaze flicked from man to man, looking for the slightest evidence they would rush him. The lead guard laughed.

"You're an escaped prisoner!" he said. Hiccup backed up half a step.

"Wh-what?" he asked, the sound strangled.

"Convicted of theft of a valuable cultural artefact…" the guard began but Astrid stepped forward.

"I am certain you are mistaken, sir," she said calmly. "My husband, General Eretson, has never stolen from your isle. He is a decorated soldier who moved to Berk from the mainland when we wed two months ago. I am Lady Astrid Eretson…and this is our adopted son, Arild. I am afraid you have wasted your time…" Her delivery was so confident, so smooth that Hiccup found himself half-believing it himself…except that he already knew that Eret was dead-at his wife's hand. The guards stared at them for a second…and then the lead guard shook his head.

"I believe that he protested that he had an accomplice, two years ago…a blonde woman…" he accused her.

"And a man with his description and the boy's description were seen on those Jorgensen ships that were sunk…" another guard piped up. Hiccup rolled his eyes.

"Are you going to blame me for Balder's death as well?" Hiccup asked sarcastically. The guards all moved closer, weapons raised. Breathing hard and stretching his hand back to snare his girlfriend's, he forced himself to move his hand away from the hilt of his sword.

"Arrest them all!" the guard growled. "I don't know what their plan is but they won't be causing any more harm here! We'll give them a fair trial in the morning-followed by a fair execution!"

oOo