"You should change into something dry."
"Ok."
I bit my lip as she grabbed some clothes from her closet and shuffled into her bathroom to change.
Her voice still had the same tone it had before. The uncaring, 'I-wish-I-was-dead' tone, the same one Sam had.
I gulped and shook my head, chasing the thoughts away. The water droplets splattering on my face reminded me that I was still soaking wet. With a shiver, I unzipped my hoodie and peeled it off my shoulders.
My shirt underneath was just as drenched, much to my discomfort. The AC was on, making goosebumps rise on my arms.
I slung my hoodie over the back of Max's desk chair and sat down on the edge of her bed to pull my shoes off.
I was trying my hardest not to think about Sam, but I couldn't seem to avoid it. It kept coming back; the phone ringing, Sam's dead voice as he told me goodbye and said he was sorry, my mistakes. Yelling at him, telling him he was selfish, asking if he even cared about me. He was crying when he hung up. I kept calling and calling, but he didn't pick up the phone again.
I can't screw up again. I can't save Sam, but I can save Max. And I will. I will.
I heard the bathroom door squeak open and turned to look. Max had changed into sweatpants that hung low on her hips, and her wet hair left dark trails on her tanktop.
As soon as she stepped into the room, she shivered and rubbed her arms.
I stood up and pulled the comforter off of her messy bed.
"Come here." I said gently, holding out my hand to her. She shuffled over, arms crossed and head down. When she reached me, I draped the blanket over her shoulders. I pulled the edges across each other, turning her into a little blonde and black burrito.
She continued to just stand there, refusing to look up at me.
Gently. Kindly. Don't get upset with her.
"Here." I murmured, tugging her gently towards her bed. "Lie down."
She obeyed, mechanically curling up on her side facing the wall. I settled down beside her, but she squirmed away.
"You're cold." she muttered. "And wet."
I sighed and reluctantly pulled my damp shirt over my head, depositing it on the floor next to the bed.
"Better?" I asked, laying down next to her. She didn't answer, so I took that as a yes and wrapped my arms around her and her blanket bundle.
For a few minutes, we just lay there quietly. The moisture from our hair was slowly soaking into the pillows, and I could feel the strange texture of drying denim against my legs.
My jeans were completely dry before I dared to say a word.
"You scared me."
When she answered, her voice was so quiet I had to strain to hear her.
"I didn't think anyone would come after me."
I snuggled a centimeter closer to her, so that I was brushing the back of her neck where the blanket exposed it.
"Angel was worried when you didn't come back."
She didn't answer.
"Max, what happened?"
There was a pause before she answered, like she was trying to decide on what to say.
"I… I hurt Ella."
"How?"
Patient. Don't rush.
"Last night." she sniffled. "I abandoned her."
"We just went out for a few hours."
She shifted slightly, curling up into a tighter ball. "She needed me. And I left her."
"You can't be around 24/7. It's ok to get out and away from all the grief."
She trembled in my arms as she held in tears.
"She was right." Max's voice was choked, and muffled from her burying her face in the blanket. "I'm selfish and irresponsible. I only think about myself."
Planting my hands on the bed, I levered myself up so that I leaned over her. She wouldn't look at me, so I just brushed some hair behind her ear and started talking anyway.
"It sounds to me like you're thinking of Ella, not yourself."
Her only response was incoherent mumbling.
"It's not your fault, you know." I whispered, leaning down so that I could nuzzle her neck, hopefully in a comforting way.
"Yes it was." she said miserably, turning away from my touches. "Jeb left because of me. Because Jeb left Mom started dating again and that got her killed. And now that I can't forgive Jeb, Ella doesn't have her father to help her."
Biting down on one of my snake bites, I considered my next words carefully. I didn't think with Sam, and look where that got me.
"Your parents got divorced," I said slowly, carefully, "Because Jeb didn't know how to love his children for who they were. Your mom died because her date was driving like a stupid idiot."
"But-"
"And," I continued firmly, not letting her cut me off, "Ella and Jeb's relationship isn't getting any better because she isn't working for it. She's waiting for you to do it for her, but you can't, Max. None of this is your fault or your responsibility."
There was a long pause, long enough that my arms got tired and I layed back down.
Eventually, Max spoke again.
"Ella thinks it's my fault."
"The universe doesn't revolve around Ella." I told her, trying to keep the angry edge out of my voice. At that moment, all I wanted was to punch Ella in the face. How dare she blame Max for this? Couldn't she tell what it did to her sister when she talked to her on the phone?
Max sniffled again. "She's the only family I have left."
"I understand, but that doesn't make her opinion the only truth in the world."
"She's all I have. And now she hates me."
"You have me." I reminded, doing my best not to feel hurt. "And the rest of the Flock. Besides, I doubt she meant that. Everyone says things they don't mean when they're angry."
We lapsed into silence again. I could tell she didn't believe me, that she still felt like she didn't deserve to be alive.
"Please." I found myself whispering. "Please don't leave me. I need you, Max."
"Ella needed me." she answered. "Everyone needs me to do something. But I'm not good enough, I never will be, I'm too selfish and-"
Gritting my teeth, I grasped her shoulder and rolled her over, forcing her to look me in the eye.
"Could you say that to me?"
She blinked, confused by my question. "What?"
"Could you tell me that I'm selfish and that no one needs me and that I'm not good enough?"
"No, of course not." Her brows furrowed in that adorable way they do, but I couldn't appreciate it right now.
"Then don't say it to yourself."
Her look of confusion morphed into one of exasperation as she looked at me. "You don't get it." she said, getting slightly testy. Time to end the conversation.
"Maybe I don't," I replied, pulling her in her burrito up against me. "Maybe talking to me isn't doing you any good at all. All I know is that I can't let you hurt yourself."
She didn't have anything to say to that, and this time I didn't break the silence. We laid there for who knows how long, until eventually her breathing evened out and I dropped into sleep.
(A/N Alrighty there we have it. Sorry for the long wait, but my muse is with me and you should be seeing another Devils Daughter chapter up soon.
UNC-
Silence)