Chapter 36

Peeta

He winced. His head hurt.

Peeta cracked open one eye. The all-too familiar bottom of the kitchen table was above him. What was he doing on the floor?

A chair beside him squeaked as Prim leaned over him, her lips moving as she ate. Her blonde hair was unbraided, hanging in wavy strands around her almost gaunt looking face.

"Oh," she said nervously. "You're awake."

It was more a statement than anything.

Peeta winced and put his hand to his forehead. There wasn't a goose egg there like the thought there would be, but the spot was tender. Prim gave him a soft look of understanding. "What….ow."

"You hit your head on the table."

Oh, he thought. Now he remembered. He remembered drinking the tea to calm down and then hitting his head on the table just as he passed out. A surge of anger rushed through him as he pieced it all together. The sweet, berry tea Katniss had convinced him to drink had been laced with sleep syrup. He didn't recognize the smell or taste of the drug right away and remembered drinking at least four or five times from the cup.

Stupid, he thought. Every kid in the district had gotten the nasty medicine at least once or twice in their lives and he had been an idiot not to realize that it was what was in the cup. He hadn't had it in years; their mother hadn't wanted to waste money on medicine for them unless they were really sick. He tilted his head backwards against the floor and looked up at the kitchen windows. Daylight was seeping through the warped glass window of the kitchen. He'd been out since evening of the day before.

She drugged me, he thought. She really drugged me and she lied to me to get me to drink that tea. Another flash of anger flashed through him before he could control it. Why had she lied to him like that? How could you lie to someone you claimed you loved? Unless she doesn't really love you.

"She drugged me and left, didn't she?" he asked.

She didn't answer right away, confirming it. Instead, Prim handed him a cloth packed with snow and motioned to his forehead a she chewed. Peeta frowned. "What are you eating?"

She sighed. "Snow. There so much of it I figured I might as well. I laced it with a ground up vanilla bean and some dried lavender. Want to try it?" she asked, holding out the bowl. Peeta shook his head as his stomach turned. The remnants of the syrup were still making him queasy.

"No thanks," he groaned, moving to sit up. The pounding in his head increased as he did so, but holding the snow to his head helped. He blinked his bleary eyes and looked around the quiet house. "Where is everyone?"

"Mother is trying to trade one of her dresses for supplies."

"Where's Katniss?" he asked, moving to stand. He needed to hear her say it. He leaned against the kitchen counter and glanced out the window. The mines were still smoldering in the background. He looked at Prim's nervous face. "She didn't drug me for no reason. Where did she go? To town? How long has she been gone?"

Prim nodded anxiously. "We….the town was bombed. While you were out, I…."

His eyes went wide. "It was? Holy shit, I…I can't believe she did this to me," he grumbled, shaking his head. "How could she drug me like that? Like I'm no more than a silly child she wants to go to sleep?

Prim gave him a sad look. "She said she had to go and save your family. She knew it meant a lot to you and that….and that she couldn't at least save them then…"

Katniss' little sister chewed her lip and gave the window facing the town a worried glance "She wanted to do this for you Peeta," she said quietly. "She owed you."

He clenched his fists and slammed it against the counter with a crack, making Prim jump. "Doesn't she get it? She doesn't owe me anything!" he hissed. "When will that woman get it through her head that I want…." He trailed off, shaking his head. "She doesn't owe me anything. I love her. You don't owe people you love," he said, lowering his voice. "You just don't."

He looked over at Prim, who was still cowering slightly from his outburst. "I'm sorry," he sighed. "I didn't mean to explode like that Prim. I'm sorry," he repeated. "I just…I would have never wanted to put her in danger just to save my family. Doesn't she get it? If I lose her and I've already lost most of them, then…I'll have nothing."

"Peeta, maybe this isn't about you. She wanted to pay you back for saving her that day in the square."

"But….she doesn't have to, don't you see? If she dies, then….Ulgh, I just can't even…"

Prim gave him a perplexed look from the chair. Peeta sighed. How could he explain it?

"Prim….all my life when things were bad…. I knew I had to keep fighting. For her."

Prim sighed. "Is this about the bread?"

"Wait, she told you about that? That time I threw her the bread?"

Prim's eyes fell to the floor. "She…once, yes. She told me. It was years later. I asked her what made her decided to go into the woods one day and start hunting. She said 'hope'. I asked her…where she got hope. She got this funny little smile and she said, 'bread'. It took me awhile to figure it out, but none of the bread we ever made was like that bread you tossed her. I figured that had to be it. Where else would she have gotten it? I know she didn't steal it like she said. And sometimes…she would watch you. And I'd watch her, watching you and I just figured you had something to do with it. Am I right?"

"I guess I didn't….realize it had that profound of an effect on her."

"Well…like I said. It was good bread and we needed it."

"You remember that?" he asked. Prim had to be quite young at the time, as he'd only been a boy himself.

Prim shrugged her boy shoulders. "If you hadn't eaten in as long as we had, then…you'd remember it to."

Peeta sighed. "I'm sorry I couldn't…didn't do more. I feel sorry about that every day."

"Don't," she reassured him. "Everyone knew your mother."

Peeta's face felt hot. "She's….I'm more like my dad. He wouldn't have cared if I tossed her that bread, but she did."

"So you get why she owes you?"

He shrugged. "A little. But when will she get over this? She still thinks about that bread I tossed her – I know she does. She's always talking about 'owing' me. I know that's what she means. But you get why I'm upset? What if she's hurt? I watched her too. Everyday. I swore that I would do whatever it took to save her. And if I gave up, who would save her? Who would be there to look after her, or toss her another loaf of bread? No one. I guess….as weird as it sounds Katniss was always my reason for living. Or fighting," he sighed.

Prim nodded in understanding, moving to stand next to him. "She's….she's Katniss, Peeta. I don' know that she would ever understand that she doesn't owe you for that. For the bread, for the whipping….for everything. You and I both know that's now how she operates."

"Sadly, I do. But I can't let her just go off into a town that's been bombed. What if she'd been hurt? I've to go-"

Prim let out a nervous whimper as she jumped up. "No! She made me swear she wouldn't let you go. It's too dangerous – besides Katniss is smart. She'll be fine."

"Then where is she?"

Prim twisted her thin hands in her lap as she shrugged. "I…I don't know, but she'll be back soon. Peeta, Katniss is-"

The front door opened, cutting her off. Gale helped Mrs. Everdeen over the threshold, stomping their boots of snow. Gale looked around the room, his grey eyes stormy. "Not back yet?"

"No," Prim sighed, staring down at the floor.

Gale grunted, placing the package from Mrs. Everdeen's hands on the counter. "I'll go look for her."

Peeta balked. "Am I the only one concerned that its daylight and she isn't back yet? How long has she been gone?" he asked. "When did the bombs come?"

Prim chewed her lip and shrugged. "Maybe seven? Last night? Then another around ten?"

"Shit," Peeta muttered, shaking his head. Gale shrugged his coat back on and calmly reached for the front door. "I'll go looking."

"I'm coming with you," Peeta quipped, going towards the coatrack. He pulled Katniss' father's coat off the hook by the door and was shrugging into it when Gale's hard hand flashed out to stop him.

"What are you doing?"

Peeta raised an eyebrow. He wasn't in the mood to fight with Gale today. "Um, going with you. Like I said."

Gale shook his head. "No. No, I can't have you to worry about too. You stay here and look after Mrs. E and Primmy. Just stay put, alright? I've got enough to worry about."

Prim scoffed from the other side of the kitchen, pushing away from the counter. "Gale, 'Primmy' will be just fine here without you. I'm not a kid anymore – I can stay put while you guys go look for Katniss and Peeta's family. That's what's important right now."

Gale narrowed his eyes at her. "No. I'm not just abandoning you here when all hell is probably about to break loose. What if something happened?"

Prim gave Gale a hard look that looked foreign on her kind face. "Deal with it. We'll be fine. Now you and Peeta go find Katniss. And stop treating me like an incompetent baby. We need to do something while we still can Gale."

"You're my kid sister," he finally sighed, slumping his shoulders. He trudged over to where she stood, reached into his pocket, and shoved a sheathed knife at her handle first. "Alright. This is Pa's hunting knife – he never went into the woods without it. I guess if it…if it kept him safe it'll keep you guys safe."

Peeta felt himself smile slightly as Gale leaned forward and pressed a brotherly kiss to the top of Prim's head before gently tousling her blonde head. Peeta realized that they were like family; the family he might not have. His throat felt rough as he shook his head at their antics before opening the front door. Gale paused beside him with a quizzical look.

"You're seriously going, aren't you?"

"Try to stop me," Peeta answered. His heart sped up slightly as he realized Gale was not the type of person to back down from a challenge and perhaps he shouldn't have dared the tall, lean Seam boy to 'try', but Gale only pressed his lips into a thin line.

"There could be anything out there. Peacekeepers, Bombs, hovercrafts. You're sure?"

Peeta swallowed and nodded. He was well aware of what could be out there waiting for him. He'd barely just gotten over his injuries – was he willing to go out and risk getting hurt again? The answer was obvious. "Katniss is out there."

Gale's stoic demeanor changed as a lopsided smile appeared on his soot-smeared face. "You're alright Bread Boy."

Peeta shook his head and motioned for the door. "Now that that's settled…can we go rescue her?"

Gale slapped his shoulder before yanking the front door back open. A blast of icy morning wind hit his face as he pulled the scarf Prim had shoved at him the last second against his mouth. The Seam was eerily quiet against a backdrop of a bitter cold dawn as he followed Gale away from the house.

"Which way would she use?"

"This way," Gale said, bending his face down to avoid the slam of frigid wind. They hurried through the deep snow, slipping on the frozen places where the path was turning to ice. They had only been walking for less than a minute when a moving mass up ahead caught his eye. His heart stopped.

"Dad!"

He pushed past Gale as he broke into a run. His father was at least a hundred feet in front of them, his pale face looking up with relief.

"Peeta!" he called. "Help!"

Peeta's legs churned faster and faster until he got close enough to slid to a halt in front of them. They were huddled in a heap next to an abandoned grain silo, the wind whipping around the side with fierce strength. Peeta's father grasped him quickly, motioning to the ground where Katniss was slumped.

"Get her inside," he instructed, his voice cracking. Peeta glanced down at the red snow that surrounded the pair. He spied his father's apron wrapped around his leg, the white material turning steadily red. "You're bleeding!"

Gale hurried up, panting wildly as he took in the scene. "Shit! What happened?"

Peeta's father rasped again. "She brought me back from the town. We were bombed. She just collapsed though – hurry!"

The wind whipped around them as Peeta fell to the snowy ground, his knees digging into the frozen ice. He gently turned Katniss over, brushing the snow away from her face. He inhaled sharply at the size of the gash on her forehead and noticed that her arm was bleeding badly as well.

"Blood loss," Gale sighed over the sound of the wind. "She'll be fine, just get her inside!"

Peeta quickly scooped Katniss up in his arms, struggling to stand up in the wind. Her head lolled backwards as he adjusted her against his chest.

She weighs less than most of the bags of flour I carry, he thought. Gale hitched an arm around his father's side and began quickly helping him back towards the house.

"We gotta hurry Bread Boy, no telling what's coming!" Gale hissed in a low voice. Peeta glance down at a limp Katniss in his arms and nodded.

"You got him?'

"Yeah, come on!"

They shuffled through the snow, Peeta carrying Katniss and Peeta's father leaning on Gale for support. Even though Katniss was lean and only of average height, his arms were still burning by the time he jogged up to the Everdeen's porch. Prim yanked the door open with wide eyes, jumping out of the way as Peeta hurried to the couch. He carefully laid Katniss down on the threadbare cushions, pulling the shabby blanket they'd used before to cover her body. Mrs. Everdeen instructed Gale to put Peeta's father on the kitchen table. He looked over his shoulder and watched as his father grimaced in pain, the wrappings around his leg becoming dark with more blood. Peeta gulped again and looked at Katniss. She was still out cold.

"Prim!" he called.

Prim's head shot up and she raced over from the kitchen. "I'm coming," she panted, rushing to his side. "My mom is going to take care of your dad, but I can stitch Katniss up. Can you help me get her out of her jacket? She'll kill me if I cut her out," Prim ordered.

Peeta nodded, lifting her up off the couch so that Prim could maneuver the jacket off. The cut on her forehead had stopped oozing blood, but the one on her arm seemed to be getting worse. Once she was stripped of her coat Prim rushed to the kitchen to the baggie of medical supplies. Peeta watched as her eyes flashed over Mr. Mellark as Gale hurriedly helped her cut his pants off to see his wound. There was such a flurry of activity as the healers of the house tried to get everything organized, yet Peeta still realized the look on Mrs. Everdeen's face was an anxious one. Would she be able to help him?

Prim dashed to her sister's side. "You'll need to hold her down. I'm going to clean and stich her arm and I can't have her waking up and thrashing around," Prim ordered quietly. "Can you do that?" she asked when he didn't answer right away.

"Hold her…um….o-ok," he stuttered nervously. He moved to the side so that Prim had room and rested his body across her stomach, gripping her skinny wrists in his fingers. Katniss didn't stir as Prim hurriedly cleaned her wounds with a bubbling liquid, gently patting each cut and gash dry. She started on her head first – that only required two stitches with her careful needle. When she moved to her arm, Peeta chanced another look over his shoulder. Mrs. Everdeen was bent over his father's leg, her face twisted into a grimace.

"Do you think he'll be okay?" Peeta asked. He gave Prim a guilty look. He hadn't even taken a moment to look at his father's wounds – all he cared about was getting Katniss stitched back up. He lowered his head in shame as he realized his fault, but he didn't know what to do. How could he chose between Katniss and his own father?

"He has a bad gash in his leg. I think maybe from some glass or metal from one of the bombs," Prim answered softly as she began to stich. Katniss flinched in her sleep, Peeta gripping her arms a little tighter. She groaned as Prim worked to quickly seal the wound shut, twisting slightly against her grasp.. Peeta wondered what could have flown against her arm to cut it like that – what his mind came up with he didn't like.

"Are you mad?"

He looked over at Prim, who was concentrating as she fastened a bandage over her sister's forehead.

Peeta looked down at the ground. "I don't know."

As relieved as he was to have her back, he still felt a sense of betrayal that she had tricked him and drugged him into staying.

He heard his father groan from the kitchen. Strangely, the sound was comforting. His father was still alive and Katniss had done that for him. She'd drugged him to hopefully save someone in his family. Could he really begrudge her of that?

Slowly, his mind went to a darker place. Had she only been able to drag his father back? Were the others still at the bakery? No, he thought. There was no way his father would agree to be the only one taken to safety – injured leg or not. For as awful as his mother was, his father was and always had been tied to her by an enormous sense of duty to be a good husband. Peeta knew this. His father would have never agreed to be the only one taken to the Seam. So what had happened to them? Did they run to safety? Did Katniss even find his father in the bakery, or was he someplace else? Dozens of questions he wasn't sure he wanted the answers to burned through his mind as he held Katniss' thin wrists.

Prim caught his eye and gave him a soft look. "Let me finish here and then I'll go help my mom. Maybe we can get some answers from your dad then," she whispered quietly. She paused her work to touch Peeta's arm, looking into his wide eyes with a gentle gaze. "It's going to be alright, Peeta."

He clenched his jaw to keep cry crying out in uncertainty and anguish, nodding as the unshed tears seemed to make his eyes and throat burn. He sniffed and turned his attention back to Katniss as Prim continued her work.

"There," she sighed, patting her sister's arm. She reached up with nimble little fingers and twisted a piece of Katniss' hair away from her face. "Let's let her rest. She probably did lose a lot of blood."

Peeta shook his head and tried not to choke over his own anxiety. "How are you…so calm?"

She shrugged, glancing over her shoulder at her mother in the kitchen. Peeta followed her gaze, watching as Mrs. Everdeen still hunched over his father's leg. Gale sat at his head, holding his shoulders as he thrashed slightly.

"Miners…get brought to us a lot. I grew up seeing them being carried into our house, covered in blood and burns and needing to be stitched up and….it never bothered me. I always wanted to help and that's never changed. I guess I'm more like my mother. Katniss is definitely like our father," she said with a little smile. "Come on. Let's go see what we can find out."

Peeta stood and followed Prim into the kitchen. It was the first time he'd really been able to see his father's wounds up close and it didn't look good.

Mr. Mellark was stripped down to his undershirt and shorts, lying on the kitchen table just as Peeta had. Gale was holding his shoulders down but struggling as a thin sheen of sweat had begun to cover his pale, brawny body. He looked clammy and washed out as Katniss' mother chewed her lip and continued cleaning the gash on his leg.

"Peeta, he'll be alright. We just have to get him cleaned up," Mrs. Everdeen murmured, straightening up. She met his father's wild, pain filled eyes and took his hand in hers. Peeta watched as she squeezed it tightly. "It'll be alright," she repeated, this time to Mr. Mellark.

His father wheezed in understanding. Peeta reached for his hand. "Dad…where are the others? Are they still alive? Rye? Bannock?"

He watched his father swallow, a trickle of sweat run down the side of his neck. Gale looked down at the floor as Mr. Mellark finally spoke.

"Peeta…" he wheezed, the breaths leaving his heaving chest. "They're gone."

I apologize for the delay on this - I had some personal RL stuff that has kept me busy for a few days, but I'm back now ! Please excuse the wait.

Hope you enjoyed the canon/book refrences. I thought it fitting to give Mr. Mellark Peeta's HG injury. What did you think?

Thanks for reading and please review! : )