The three of them did little but sleep for the next few days. Sam seemed to recharge his batteries the quickest. He was up and cleaning up their mess within 24 hours.
He picked up the cat lore book for about the hundredth time that week and set it on the table. Ellis and Dean were sitting there, both looking distinctly hung over.
Ellis raised an eyebrow as the action kicked up little motes of dust that caught in a slant of sunlight through the kitchen window.
Sam sighed. "The cat seems fairly obsessed with cat lore."
Dean snorted. "Go figure." His voice was still gravelly. "Ellis, why don't you have coffee like a normal human?"
"Tea is better for you," she said.
Dean bit his lip. "Doesn't taste as good."
"Coffee tastes like ass you're just used to it." She rebutted.
Sam's eloquent brow was furrowed. "Ellis?"
"Yes honey?" She asked, her head leaning on her hand. Somewhere to their left the cat jumped on the counter.
"Taco was with you in the circle."
"Yes, he does that."
"You said you couldn't get through to Dad." The tone wasn't accusing but it was enough to put her on the defensive.
"No." She said a little guardedly, lifting her head, clearly wondering where he was going with that observation.
"I think the cat is trying to tell us something..." Sam said, watching the orange fur as Taco jumped off the counter and sauntered back to his food bowl near the refrigerator. "Did Taco get through?"
She didn't have to reply because Dean looked at him as if he were stupid. "The cat?"
"Well," Sam began, rationally. "I've been reading that cats can cross dimensions and they're associated with the underworld, some cultures believe..."
"Sam." Dean said, rolling his eyes. "Give it a rest, man. What the fuck is a cat gonna do in Hell? Like how would that even help Dad?"
Sam shrugged. "It wouldn't. I was just wondering if maybe he made it through when she didn't."
Ellis's expression was unreadable. "The spell didn't work and I'm not doing it again. Whatever demonic thing I drew the attention of was horrifying." She shuddered.
"I didn't say to do it again, I just wondered..."
"I saw Taco there." Ellis cut him off with the affirmation.
Dean's mug clattered. "There? You saw Dad? Where was he? What was happening?"
"Nothing." She lied. "It was too vague. Very dark, so hard to make anything out."
Sam gave her a knowing, measuring gaze that told her that he was on to her. But he said nothing about it. Didn't call her on it. Instead he picked up a roll of paper towels. "Well you two chill here, I'm gonna go clean the bathroom."
"Good," Ellis said, appreciative of the distraction. "I'm sick of Dean pissing on the floor."
"I do not piss on the floor." Dean fell for the bait.
"You have terrible aim."
"I do not!" Dean bristled. "It's probably Sam."
"To be fair I was pretty wasted the one night." Sam admitted, grabbing the Windex underneath the sink. "But Dean has shitty aim." He closed the cupboard and walked out.
"What's in the tea?" Dean asked, his face a bit sleepy. "I feel kinda chill."
"It's my mystery blend."
"That's comforting." He brought the rim to his lips and took another sip. She watched his throat work for a second. He looked a little better, had some color to his face. He blinked those impossibly long eyelashes and looked up at her. "The other night..."
"Yeah?"
"I'm sorry. I kinda trapped you on the couch with me."
She smirked. "I don't mind. At all. Not like being pressed against you is a bad thing."
The corner of his mouth lifted, his eyes lit up at the approval. "Yeah?"
"Yeah."
"I was a total pussy. I just don't know what was wrong with me."
"Honey. You've almost died...twice this week. It's been pretty traumatic...for all of us. Let alone you."
Dean looked emotional for a second and dashed away anything in his eyes with his hand before they even had the chance to form into tears. "It's you." He joked. "I get around you and suddenly I'm a pussy."
She set her mug down and took his warm hand. It engulfed hers. She gave it a squeeze before she let go. "No you aren't. You just feel safe enough to show me what you're feeling."
"Which is like a PMSing chick, apparently."
Ellis was somber, a bit thoughtful. "Men often reveal parts of themselves to women that they don't reveal to other men."
Dean smirked. "We sure do."
Ellis slapped his arm. "I'm not talking about your dick, you ass."
"Don't show my ass to other men either."
"Dean!" Ellis started to laugh despite herself. "You know what I mean. You've grown up with all men. You can show me a different part of you."
"Can show you all the parts of me." He replied, still flirting.
She dropped her gaze in an appreciative gaze down his body. "I think I've seen them all this week."
He frowned. "That's not fair. Eveythin' was out of order."
"Oh it's all in good repair now?" She asked, smiling.
"It's gettin' there," he said. "I think it's back in service."
"I'm not going to ask how you know this."
"Bein pressed against a girl all night kinda wakes up the merchandise." Dean whispered as he took a sip of tea and locked her with big green eyes.
She flushed a little. "You're bad."
"I thought you said I was a good boy." He smirked. "I distinctly remember you saying I was a good boy."
"Only when you're half-conscious."
He gave her his roguish smile. "Fair enough."
It was a relief to watch Dean improve. Sam too on some level. She could see stress leaving him now that he knew he wasn't going to lose his brother. Ellis was distinctly unhappy to see them go. She thought about how she could live with the Winchester boys happily if it weren't for reality intervening.
Dean and Sam had all their shit packed. They shrugged on their coats. The feeling of parting was heavy in the air.
Ellis shoved a bag of cookies at Sam. "For the road." She eyed Dean. "You sure you feel okay to leave?"
"Yeah. I'm good." He grabbed the cookies from Sam and scarfed one before Sam wrestled them back.
Ellis hugged Dean and he pulled her to his chest and wrapped her tight in his arms. She felt him kiss the top of her head. She clung on. Felt like this might be the last time she saw him. She suppressed tears, the lump in her throat so tight it was actually painful.
She thought of the broken angry man she'd seen in her visions. Such a far cry from this ball of life. Of light.
"Be a good boy."
"I'm always good," he said, with a little shove of his hip into hers. Oh god, how she wished she could've had a taste of that and still lived with herself in the morning.
"I'm sure you are." She said.
He gave one last squeeze and stepped back. "Meet you at the car, Sam."
Sam pulled his father's dog tags out of his pocket. "Here. Before I forget." He dropped them into Dean's hand.
Dean raised an eyebrow. "They're not mine, dude."
"Yes." Sam said. "Yes they are. Take care of them."
Dean gave a quick duck of his chin in acknowledgement and walked outside. The screen door banged shut behind him as he made his way down the stairs, still a bit carefully, still a bit stiffly.
She looked at Sam. Sweet Sam. Knees in the mud. The life going out of him.
She threw her arms around him. He went willingly into her embrace.
"Thank you," he said.
"Anytime, Sam. I mean anytime." She tightened her grip on him. So hard it hurt her arms. Couldn't bear to think of this sweet light going out of the world. Couldn't bear to think of him dying when she'd been warned and couldn't figure out how to stop it.
"I love you, Sam."
She felt his surprise and then he said, "We love you too."
"Be careful out there."
"I'll be as careful as I can. Thanks, Ellis." There was a tug on his pant leg of his faded jeans and Sam broke away and looked down in surprise. His handsome face lit up. "Hey Taco." He said congenially, all dimples and charm. He gently picked the cat up. "Thanks for your help, buddy."
Taco butted his head against Sam's face with a happy buzz.
Sam handed him back to Ellis, gave her a wave and a duck of his head and was down the steps. He came around to the driver's side and she saw a quick argument with Dean, who was behind the wheel. Sam tossed his duffle into into the back and then bodily shoved Dean across the seat with his shoulder. Dean tussled with him weakly, gave him a small pop to the head in protest, before settling into the passenger seat, sulking. Sam situated himself behind the wheel, started her up and they were gone.
Ellis clutched Taco to her and tried to fight the warning in her heart that the boy's trials had just begun.
Ellis woke with a start in the night. It had been months since she'd seen the boys and she thought of them often. Wondered how they were. They were terrible at keeping touch. Worse than their father had been.
The window was open, letting in the early May breeze. She'd broken into a cold sweat. Her sheets were drenched. She almost would have blamed it on hormones, except for the pounding heart and empty feeling in the pit of her stomach that warned her it was something else entirely.
Taco stirred from his sleep at her feet and blinked at her, his yellow eyes luminescent in the dark.
She dashed away tears that she didn't remember shedding. She stood up and grabbed her light silken robe, wrapped it around herself. Debating fixing some toast and hot chocolate-her go to remedy for anxious nights passed down by her mother. And suddenly a flicker of light like the reception on a black and white TV that was having trouble tuning in caught her eye at the foot of the bed.
She froze. It flickered again.
A male figure.
And then suddenly, surrounded in a rich white light like moon glow, John Winchester stood there. All dark hair and stubble and handsome whisky-sad looks. Her breath caught on a sob of his name. "John!"
His face and presence brought a fresh stab of longing and pain and missing him with all her might. Missing his voice. His touch. Him.
He blinked, his mouth curving into a dimpled smile filled with fondness. He cocked his head to look at her. The affection there was unmistakable.
"Are you here?" She choked, closing the gap between them. "Are you really here?"
He gave her his slight nod and glanced to Taco, who stood looking at him from the bed.
His grin broke into an actual smile. White teeth and charm. Tall and handsome. Just like he'd been in life.
Then his attention went back to Ellis. He looked down at her little form and held up a palm. She put hers next to it. Could feel the coolness in the air. She could almost hear his thoughts. Love those little hands, Ellie.
"Are you free?" she breathed.
He flickered. Stepped back with a smile. Inclined his head in a nod that said "yes" and then, insubstantial as a swirl of moonlight, John Winchester flickered and left in in a flash of starshine.
Ellis let out a sob. Then another. She stumbled back and sat on the edge of the rumpled bed. Taco walked over, put a testing paw on her thigh and then hopped up and curled into her lap.
They watched the moon go down together.
The End.
Phew! Sad to say goodbye to this one. Thank ALL of you who followed, especially my reviewers last chapter and any chapter. Peanut SPN, Kathy, Michele, Sallyannerenee, waitingforAslan, Colbie15, i woke up, dom darkwolf, fanpire,shadowhuntingdd, ngregory, Rimeko, Mckyd, wayward inspirations, and my guest reviewer who said that "Dean and Ellis need to get it on." LOL...cracked me up.
Please drop me a note and let me know what you thought, even if you stumble upon this story months from now. Always love feedback. Torn between putting Ellis away for good or continuing with a sequel starring her and Castiel eventually. For now, please click subscribe if you want to keep up to date with new projects. Next I'm picking up on Burning the Primrose Path.
Thanks again. Taco waves a furry paw farewell.