Okay, sorry for the rather short chapter... I wanted to fuse this one with the next, but then I would be one chapter short from what I had promised^^ so *shrugs* yeah^^

UnderTheJackPine: I don't know where you are in the world, so I hope you get this before morning^^

Booki: thank you so much! I'm glad to know I'd have at least one reader ;-)

Chapter 36

The next morning, after my daily vomiting session, I returned in bed. I had no will whatsoever to get ready for that day, or for the rest of the week, as it was. I was dreading my conversations with Westley and Tristan. This Selection was going way too fast. I honestly didn't think it would be down to four – well, three, if you don't count Kurt – just five weeks after the beginning. But that was all Phil's fault. Or mine, maybe, too, for trusting him. But what the heck? Friends should be trusted, right?

"My Lady, it's time to get up." Anna said after doing all she could do around my room that didn't need my royal person – like getting dressed. "Your Father will be waiting for you. And you need to go eat breakfast, too."

"Anna, can't I get just one day off?" I whined.

"I would be the first one to give you a whole year off. But I'm afraid your condition is known to no one, and you still need to show that everything is alright." she said with a companionate smile.

"Right. And top that with finding a husband before the next Report." I added sarcastically.

"Yes." she conceded. "That, too. Do you have an idea of who it's going to be?" she asked as I stepped in the shower.

"Not really. I wish I didn't have to choose and that I could have the three of them." I laughed. This was ridiculous. I knew my heart loved one more than the others, but I still couldn't see who it was. I sighed and let the water drain the night's sweat off of me. I watched the water flow all over me for who knows how long.

"My Lady, is everything okay?" Anna asked.

"Um, sure. Yeah, sorry." I turned off the water and she handed me my bathrobe that I pulled over my wet body. I sat in front of the mirror and Anna started to dry my hair with the hairdryer. She worked in silence, giving me the time and quiet – despite the hairdryer's hum – to think over what I needed to say to Tristan and Westley. This was going to be complicated, but I needed to go through with it. There was no way I was telling the One after I had chosen him. That would be the worst hustle ever. 'Oh, well, now that we're married, you need to know something: I'm pregnant and you're not the father. Sorry.' Ha. That would be just horrible.

After my hair had dried and was fixed in an intricate braided bun, Anna had me slip on a bright red Empire waist tea-length dress and black heels. I thanked her, and headed downstairs to the Dining Room. Not surprising at all, I was the last one to enter, and I went to fill my plate from the buffet table and took my seat between Adam and Rachel.

"Hey, Rose." Adam whispered. "I just wanted to be sure you didn't hate me or anything."

"What ever for, Adam?" I asked him, really not knowing what he was talking about.

"For falling in love with Kate-Lyn instead of you."

I burst out laughing. "Adam! This was meant to be. How could I hate you for this? You're the best person that could happen to Kate. I just hope you were able to have enough money to help your sister."

He lifted his eyebrows. "You remembered that?"

"Yeah. I even remember telling you I would keep you as long as possible." I chuckled. "I guess you're staying for life, now. But for free, though, I'm afraid."

He laughed, too. "Yeah, for free, now. But I had enough, and she's doing better now. My dad was able to buy her a better treatment, and she is on the path to recovery."

"Adam, I'm so glad to hear that. Is your family happy to know you are going to stay here?"

"Yeah. I'm really looking forward to seeing them again, though. I hope they'll be able to come soon." he said with a sad smile.

"Adam, invite them here whenever you want. Besides, this Selection will soon end and there will room enough room here to have all your family here. I think Father and mom would like to meet them."

"They do, yes, but they wanted to wait for the end of your Selection."

"Rest assured, then, for Friday, I shall announce the One on the Report." I said, putting some raspberry tart in my mouth.

"What? This soon? Who are you going to choose?"

"That's the problem, I still don't know." I shrugged as if it wasn't that big of a problem.

"Rose. Take your time: this is for life, remember?"

I sighed. "I know. But I don't have the time. I need to choose him in three days."

He frowned. "What do you mean you don't have the time? It's been only five weeks. You've got all the time in the world."

"No I don't." I simply replied.

"Are you eager for married life?" he asked with a wicked grin and wiggling his eyebrows.

I chuckled and felt my cheeks turn red. If this was what I needed to have him believe instead of the truth, I would take that.

Then Kate talked to him and the conversation was over. I sighed and resumed eating.

I decided to postpone as much as I could what I really needed to do. So, in the meantime, I cooped myself up in Father's office and pretended to work. I pretended because my heart was beating way too fast than normal, and my mind was racing in all directions at once. How was I going to broach the subject? How would they take this? How will I do to not break down? I needed to be strong in this.

I saw Father look over at me several times, with a quizzical look on his face. Finally he asked me if I was okay and if I needed to take the rest of the morning off.

"Thank you Father. I'm fine. Maybe just a little overheated, that's all." I shrugged and tried to focus on the paper in front of me. I had no idea what it was talking about, so I started to read it from the start. Again. I heard him summon a maid and quietly talk to her. A couple minutes later, she was back with a tall glass of lemonade – my favourite, with lots of sugar in it – that she put on the table next to me.

"Thanks, Aleen." I said, taking the cold glass in my hands and taking one long mouthful and feeling it flow all the way down my stomach; and it felt really good. I checked the time: one more hour before lunch. Then I'd have to go look either for Tristan or Westley.

Lunch came, and I couldn't keep my gaze off of the boys' table. There was a good mood around the boys right now, but I was afraid that would change in the coming days, once I'd talk with them. Then something hit me: if neither Tristan, Nigel nor Westley would want to be the father of Flower, it would leave me only Kurt. But I knew he wasn't in love with me, and to be honest, neither was I. He was a really good friend, and I couldn't imagine anything else. Besides, he was going to be a student soon, and I didn't want to take that away from him. So if none of the remaining boys would accept two people instead of only one, I'd have to marry Phil. And that was out of the question. I would just be a pregnant unmarried mother, and my reputation would be finished. At least one of them needed to be the One. Please?

I walked out of the room, heading to wherever my feet would carry me, when Tristan caught up with me.

"Rose, I was wondering if you'd want to go riding with me this afternoon?" He said with a grin on his face and his ice blue eyes shining of excitement.

"Um, I don't think I'm up to riding, today." I said apologetically.

"Oh, um, then let's just go say 'hi' to the horses. And we'll see what we do after that." He wiggled his eyebrows, giving me his arm.

"Okay." I took his arm and we slowly strolled to the Barn.

"So, your Elite are thinning out, huh?" he said casually.

"Yeah." I shrugged. "But they all had their reasons to go, even if it broke my heart each time." I admitted.

"Aw, I'm truly sorry to hear that, love."

Oh. That was new, he never called me 'love' before. "You're not going to have cold feet, too are you?"

"What? No, of course not. I love you too much for that. And I've come too far to quit now."

"Good." I said as we passed under the barn doors. I knew I had to talk about Flower to Tristan this afternoon, and I didn't want anybody around for that, so I kindly asked – I hoped it didn't sound too weird – the horse grooms to leave the Barn and leave us alone.

I let go of his arm, took a couple apples from the basket near the door, and swiftly walked to Apples giving him his favourite treat – that's why I had called him Apples, by the way – rubbing his nose as he chewed the food. Tristan was leaning on the stall, his arms crossed, looking at me and smiling. I tried to ignore his stare.

"You sure you don't want to go ride to the stream in the forest?" he asked again.

"Yeah, I'm sure."

"Okay." He said as he looped his arms around my waist, and buried his nose in the small of my neck, near my shoulder from behind me. "We can stay right here, then." he whispered. He started kissing my neck, and then what was visible of my shoulders. He pulled the sleeve down a bit, to reveal my left shoulder and kissed it again and again.

"What are you doing?" I asked, slightly out of breath. His embrace was sending shivers and a warm feeling all over me.

"I'm trying to make you choose me, love." he gently turned me around, making me face him. His lips explored my face, my neck, my shoulders and my décolleté. My heart doubled its pace when his hands moved to my hips and then thighs. Jeeze, how would I be able to focus, now?

"Tristan, wait." I managed to gasp out.

"What?" he sounded a bit annoyed, but still obeyed and rested his forehead against mine, his lips still trying to kiss my lips.

"I just need to know something before anything else happens." It was really hard to focus with him so close and demanding.

"What?"

"If we couldn't have children, would you consider adoption?" I blurted out.

He chuckled. "Of course, love. Anything for you." he resumed kissing every inch of visible skin. "But are you sure an adopted child could be Heir?" he suddenly asked.

"I think so, yes." I breathed out. But I already knew: if a Royal couple was barren, they could adopt and the child would be the Heir. But if by any miracle they still managed to conceive, their biological child would become the Heir, even if he or she was younger than the adopted one.

"Then we'd have to adopt a boy." He said between kisses. "If I can't be King, I'd like to have my son be King."

I froze: so it was him, and Hunter was right.

"All right." I said for lack of anything else. I kind of kissed him back, too, but my mind was trying hard to focus on my next question. Tristan was being more and more demanding, his hands exploring pretty much everywhere and his knee between my legs, pinning me to the stall.

"One more thing." I manage to get out of my throat.

"What?" I had a feeling he was not going to accept this well, and that I was annoying him with my questions, but I needed to know.

I sighed. "Would you adopt if the child was mine and not yours?" I closed my eyes, unable to look at him, because I was too scared of his reaction.

He froze and backed away a couple steps, frowning. "What are you saying, Rose. Are you pregnant?"

If I said 'yes', I had a feeling he would explode in anger, and if I said 'no', I would be lying. So I said nothing. But my silence said enough for me.

He closed his eyes and tried to calm down. "Who is the father?" But he didn't let me answer. "I can't believe you slept with one of the Selected and you're refusing me right now. What is wrong with you?"

"Does it help if I tell you I don't know who the father is?" I said softly. I know it was a lie, but I didn't feel it would be wise to tell him it was none of the Selected.

"What? You're joking, right?" I shook my head, unable to speak. "This is even worse! You sleep around and then you're pregnant and you don't know who the father is? And you want me to cover for you? You're insane." he hissed through his teeth, and he started pacing back and forth in the Barn aisle, between the Stalls. But if he wanted the Crown, he might still accept.

I sighed and rested my head against the wall, willing my tears to stay in my body.

"Fine." he said. "I'll think about it, just give me a day or two, okay?" he asked me, his brow still furrowed. "This isn't something light, and I just need some time to process it."

I nodded, and he walked away. "Tristan, wait." I called to him softly.

He turned around. "What, now?"

"Please don't say anything to anybody. I trusted you with this secret." I pleaded.

He frowned, and then nodded. "Okay." I guess if he accepted, he wouldn't want his wife's reputation to be damaged. I let him walk away and waited for him to be out of sight before slipping down the wall and squatting on the floor, my tears streaming down my cheeks, sobbing silently. This had not turned out how I had expected it to.