This is an extra long update since I have made you wait so long for it. RL has been so manic lately and I am finding it hard to find time to write. And there is only about 3 more chapters left. Enjoy!

Chapter 37- Meeting Ma

Derek was stood by the front door, holding Ava in his arms waiting for Meredith to come down from the bedroom, he understood that she was nervous, hell he was too, but he knew they needed to leave soon as his mother hated it when people were late.

"Meredith, we are going to be late" he called up the stairs.

"Mama" Ava called out after her daddy.

"Okay I'm coming" she yelled back down as she took another quick glance at herself in the mirror, and ran her hands over her dress, it was a deep midnight blue in colour and it rested on her knees, she also decided to go with a small pair of black heels. Derek had told her that didn't need to dress up but she wanted to make a good impression, this was Derek's mom after all.

"Meredith, we need to leave" he called up the stairs again.

"Fine" she said through gritted teeth, she wasn't sure that she could do this, she wanted to run, but she needed to do this for Derek and Ava, things had finally come together for them and tonight was the night that Meredith needed to be strong for herself and for Ava. Walking out of the bedroom, she took a deep breath before hitting the stairs.

"Meredith" Derek breathed out as she walked down the stairs, she immediately took his breath away.

"Mommy pwetty" Ava said, running over to her mother as she automatically lifted her arms up. Meredith lifted her up and gave her daughter a kiss on the head. She walked over to Derek who gave her a smile as he leant in kissing her lightly on the lips. He took her hand and rubbed over the top of her hand with his thumb.

"I promise Mer it will be fine. It's only my mom, Amy and Josh will be there as well. I love you" he said as he kissed her forehead, for some reason he found it difficult to stop kissing and touching her.

"I love you too"

"I love you mama, dada" Ava piped in.

"We love you too, baby" Meredith told her daughter, as she let Derek guide her out of the house. His hand was possessively positioned on her lower back.

GAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGA

"Hey Ma" Derek greeted his mother, pulling her in for a hug. "Amy and Josh arrived yet?"

"No"

"They will be here soon mom, I know Josh was looking forward to meeting his grandma" he said, trying to butter her up as for the second time that night he remembered how much she hated people being late. "Mom, I have someone for you to meet" he said pulling Meredith and Ava out from behind him.

"Mom, this is my girlfriend Meredith Grey and our daughter Ava. Meredith, this is Carolyn, my mom"

"Nice to meet you Mrs Shepherd" Meredith said with a smile, the hand that Derek placed on her lower back gave her some confidence.

"You too Meredith, my son has told me so much about you" she said not taking her eyes of her son and his girlfriend. She watched as Derek pulled out a chair for Meredith, before taking Ava out of her arms he whispered something in her ear causing her to laugh, and he gave his daughter a kiss on the head. He flashed Meredith a smile that she hadn't seen since before his father died. And she noticed how he pulled his chair closer to Meredith, and that Meredith automatically leaned into him even though she was sorting out Ava in the high chair.

"So Meredith, Derek tells me you are a neuro resident?"

"Yes I am"

"What year?"

"Well i am in my fourth year of residency"

"What made you choose neuro?" Carolyn didn't miss the quick look that Meredith shot Derek, who simply nodded at her.

"I had an amazing teacher, Mrs Shepherd" she told her.

"Meredith showed an amazing instinct for neuro, on her first day as an intern she helped to save a young girls life, and that sold her to me. I had her on every neuro case I could, at least until she left." he said as Meredith played with her napkin.

"Where did you go to do your residency?" she asked, she noticed that Meredith was upset that Derek shared that part.

"After leaving Seattle I moved to Oregon, until a few months ago." Meredith said, taking strength from Derek's hand which rested on her knee as his thumb made small circular movements on the side of it.

"What made you decide to come back?"

"Seattle is my home, and this is where my family is, and by association Ava's family"

"Of course Ava's family is here, her father is here..."

"Mom" Derek said sternly.

"It's okay Derek" Meredith said giving him a small smile as she reached under the table and squeezed his hand.

"Mrs Shepherd, I know what you are thinking but I can assure you that I knew Derek was still married, and I did not come back to break up his marriage, even though I knew it was based on lies. I came back because I needed to be close to my family." Meredith could feel Derek's eyes on her, but she ignored it. "I didn't want Derek to find out about our past relationship, especially as his choose his wife over me, even after two years of being away I still had to deal with the stares and the whispers especially when everyone saw Ava"

"Mer, I never knew"

"You weren't supposed to Derek, like everything else in my life, I dealt with it on my own"

"You don't have to..." Derek began to say to her but Meredith leaned him and kissed him gently on the mouth, softly.

"Mama, Dada, me hunwy!" Ava declared causing Meredith and Derek to pull away from each other.

"Auntie Amy will be here soon, sweetie" Meredith told her daughter.

"Jojo"

"Josh too princess" Derek reached over to the bag beside him and pulled out her seal handing it to Ava for her to play with, until Amy and Josh arrived.

"Mama, see"

"Yes Ava, you going to say hi to your grandma" Meredith said ruffling her curls.

"Hi" she said shyly, trying to tuck her head behind her mother's arm, causing Meredith to giggle at her daughter.

"Ava, you are not shy"

"Uncle Derek" they heard Josh shout across the restaurant and Derek saw him running towards him.

"Hey J-man" Derek greeted his nephew as he wrapped his arms around his waist.

"Jojo, Jojo, Jojo" Ava said pulling away from her mother and she started bouncing in her high chair, waving her little arms at her cousin.

"Hi Ava" Josh said walking over to his little cousin and giving her a cuddle.

"Hey Derek, Meredith" Amy said giving them both a hug, noticing that her son sat right next to Ava. She knew how much Josh adored his cousin, and it made her feel a little guilty that she had kept him from his other cousins. "Hi ma" she says turning to her mother, but not letting go of her brother, she needed his strength right now.

"Amy, I am so glad that you made it" Carolyn said with a smile, even she could admit how nice it was seeing her daughter again, but it also hurt how much she could tell that her daughter didn't trust her. It was obviously apparent by the way that she clung to Derek.

"Hello Joshua" Carolyn said to her grandson, looking at him closely for the first time, and she could see how much he looked like his mother and uncle. She noted how Ava and Josh almost looked like brother and sister, Carolyn knew she made a mistake 7 years ago when she refused to support Amy, and she just hoped that in time Amy would forgive her.

"Hello" he said shyly, glancing over at his mommy and Amy nodded at him, smiling at her son.

"Josh, this is your grandma" Amy said to her son, she noticed the brief look of pain that crossed her mother's eyes when Josh greeted her so coolly, but she couldn't feel sorry for her, not after everything and if it wasn't for Derek and Meredith she would never have come. "Mom, this is Josh"

"You are my Nana?" he asked.

"Yes, Josh"

"And Ava's Nana? She is my cousin." He stated proudly.

"Yeah i am" Carolyn answered her grandson; Josh climbed off his chair and wrapped his arms around Carolyn's waist.

"I always wanted a Nana" Josh said, he knew that his friends had Nanas but he never had one, and always wanted one. He remembered making his mommy sad the year before when he asked her why he didn't have a nana. Carolyn picked him up and sat Josh on her lap.

"I am so sorry, Josh" she murmured into his hair, allowing the tears to escape that she had held back for so long.

"What are you sorry for Nana?" he asked innocently.

"Ma" Amy's tone warned her.

"Nothing you need to worry about Josh" she told him before turning to her daughter "Amy, i hope you can forgive me?" She asked as she held Josh tightly to her.

"I don't know ma, i want too, but you hurt me"

"I know Amy and if I could take it back I would. I am so sorry." Carolyn told her youngest daughter.

"Sometimes sorry isn't good enough ma, I needed you, I needed my mom and you told me how I was such a disappointment to you and that the best thing I could do was abort my baby"

"I was so angry Amy when you told me you were pregnant; your father always wanted all of you to have a chance for a career; the chance that he never had. I felt that you were throwing your life away. I ought to have known better than that you were always your father's daughter Amy, even more so then Kathy, Nancy or Olivia. You and Derek your father adored, not that he would ever admit that." Carolyn smiled at the thought. "And I felt that you were letting him down, I know you barely remember daddy Amy, but you are so much like him. He would have had a few words with me long before now about how I have treated you, and for that I am so sorry Amy" Carolyn didn't want to discuss this in a restaurant but she knew how stubborn her daughter was that she would never get the chance again. She reached out and grasped her hand.

"Ma, I like to think daddy would have been proud of me. I could have given up college when I had Joshua. I almost did but Derek and Mark wouldn't let me; they supported me and when I had Josh, I hardly missed any time because they helped me, whether it was looking after Josh or arranging a sitter, just so I could still go to college. I made it, and no it hasn't been easy but I have been lucky to have an amazing brother." She said as she looked over to her brother who was whispering something in Meredith's ear.

"Dad would have been so proud of you Amy, and so am I. I know that I haven't shown it but I am really sorry for our estrangement"

"Ma, I love you i do, but things aren't going to automatically go back to how things were."

"I know that Amy, i just want a chance to get to know my daughter again and my grandson"

"Okay, but we do this at my pace mom. I need time, i can't just forget and I can't speak to any of the sisters yet"

"I understand Amy, thank you" Amy just smiled at her mother, before engaging Meredith in small talk.

Carolyn watched her children carefully and could see how happy they both were; watching Derek and Meredith together reminded her of her late husband. She could see that Meredith brought out the best of Derek and that she had not seen her son so happy and carefree since before Christopher died when he was a child, they fit each other so well. She regretted allowing Addison to lie to her son, at the time she thought that it was what was best for Derek but she was so wrong. It was clear that Meredith loved Derek so much and Derek was for the first time truly happy.

Watching Amy with Josh, she was glad that she sorted things out with her daughter, she was aware that it would take Amy time to forgive her, but she hoped that Amy would give the rest of the family the same chance. She knew the reason that Amy didn't talk to any of the girls was because she felt that they had sided with her, when actually Kathy and Nancy supported her but because of herself imposed exile when she was pregnant she never reached out to them, Carolyn knew that the girls felt that she withdrew from the family but Carolyn knew if it wasn't for her reaction to her daughter's pregnancy than Amy would never have felt the need to withdraw and if it was one of the last things she did, she would make it up to Amy.