John Watson very easily passed the belly button test, as the boys at Sherlock's school used to call it. A fact that Sherlock Holmes found both exquisitely wonderful, and at the same time rather disturbing. Because John, when un-aroused and normally attired, looked, well, normal really. Sherlock had always been interested in other boy's penises. Purely at the beginning from a scientific point of view. And only later had he discovered far more interesting experiments you could do with them. But he could honestly say that John had the most mysterious cock he had ever seen.
Fact: John Watson was seven inches shorter than Sherlock, and nine inches shorter than Mycroft.
Fact: John's feet and hands were of normal size for his height.
Fact: John's nose was a normal size.
Fact: John's penis was enormous.
Sherlock had tried to measure it on numerous occasions, but obviously it was difficult to get an accurate reading with so many distractions. Sherlock had tried to compare and contrast. He had got a good look at Mycroft and John next to one another and had ascertained that Mycroft's was about three inches shorter than John's. So all he needed was to obtain Mycroft's measurements. Which was easier said than done. Mycroft hadn't told Sherlock to "f*** off" like that since Sherlock had caught him shagging Henry Baskerville behind the cricket pavilion on speech day. Sherlock thought it was a perfectly reasonable request, but subsequent attempts to measure Mycroft by stealth, including breaking in to the cabinet office and hiding under the table, were ill fated. On the bright side, the foreign secretary had thought it was his birthday come early.
But not knowing was driving Sherlock mad. He just had to have the data; otherwise his brain would go into melt down. Which is why he was creeping across John's bedroom at three in the morning with a tape measure. No one crept like Sherlock. He was a master at it. Or at least he was when there were not ill placed obstacles in his way. Sherlock swore loudly as he stubbed his toe on a box of books. John woke up. Saw his flatmate with a tape measure and rolled his eyes.
"Sherlock what the hell do you think you are doing?"
"Oh. Well. I was going to measure your penis whilst you were sleeping." Sherlock couldn't help himself. He just blurted it out.
"Why?" John wondered if he was going to regret continuing the conversation.
"Because I wanted to know how big it was."
"Why didn't you just ask me?" John shook his head.
"Didn't think of that. There's always something." Sherlock looked annoyed with himself.
"Okay come here." John beckoned Sherlock to join him in bed. "You want to know how big it is? Right. Close your eyes." Sherlock handed john the tape measure and shut his eyes.
A few moments later Sherlock had the rather pleasurable sensation of John sliding inside him.
"So how big is it John?" John leant heavily against Sherlock letting him feel his whole length and whispered in his ear.
"This big."