My thanks to Sylvain for the beta work... and boy does he have his work cut out with me!

Runaway

Part 35

The two men had been so engrossed in hostilities that they had both failed to notice Aaron's approach, only becoming aware of him when he jostled his way in between the two of them, forcing them both to take a step back.

"Aaron!" Micah exclaimed, for a while there, he'd forgotten himself, Karl Mellor had that effect on him. Aaron was now on the scene and his hackles were raised too. The last thing Micah wanted was trouble, for someone to be hurt; he certainly didn't want Aaron getting on the wrong side of this merciless thug.

"Who's this?" Aaron demanded eyeing the bigger man suspiciously.

Before Micah had chance to reply, Mellor's gravelly voice was cutting through the cold night air, "This is a private conversation, sonny, so be a good little boy and run along."

Aaron desperately wanted to knock the condescending words back down the older man's throat, but told himself it would only make the situation a hundred times worse. Still, he couldn't stop himself from mouthing back, "Unless you're in need of some soup or a blanket, I say it's you that needs to 'run along'."

Irritated by the younger man's show of nerve, the muscle-bound Mellor leant in towards him but as he opened his mouth to speak, an ear-splitting burst from a police siren sounded around them. All heads turned towards the source of the noise and the now flashing blue lights.

'Where the hell did they come from?' Aaron thought, for once actually a little relieved to see the boys in blue. Things could well have turned ugly and he didn't want Micah getting hurt.

"Saved by the bell!" Mellor ground out, eyeing Aaron coldly.

"What?" Aaron demanded glowering back at his antagonist as he did so, he didn't want him getting the idea he was scared of him, because he wasn't.

"Leave it." Micah insisted catching hold of his boyfriend's arm.

"Is everything alright, Reverend James?"

The question had come from one of the two police officers who were now walking towards them. They obviously knew Micah, he wasn't wearing his clerical collar tonight, but they were well aware of who and what he was. Aaron listened to Micah assure the police that everything was fine, as much as he wanted to disagree and say no, that things were anything but fine he'd held his tongue. He didn't know what was going on and until he did, he thought it best he kept quiet. In the meantime, Mellor had disappeared into the night, and once the police had left, Aaron turned his attention to Micah. He wanted answers and had made that loud and clear, but Micah had again delayed the conversation, promising to explain as soon as they were home. If they didn't have an audience, if they weren't in the process of handing out some much-needed supplies, he'd have insisted they talk there and then, but he'd had to back down again, afford the situation some respect.

Aaron had thought about tackling Micah on the way home but they were only a street away from the vicarage on dropping off the last volunteer. He'd calmed down by then and had told himself it was best to wait until they were home before having the conversation. Not one word had passed between them, Micah was unusually quiet and distant, his mind was obviously elsewhere, and that troubled Aaron. He had no idea what was going on, he just knew that whatever it was, it seemed to be troubling Micah deeply. That told him he shouldn't jump in all guns blazing, he could be sensitive when he wanted to be and something told him he needed to be now.

After finally walking in through the front door, Micah led the way into the kitchen, there he set about making them both a cup of tea.

Aaron pulled out a kitchen chair and from there watched him, waiting for him to start talking, certain he would do as he'd promised and explain tonight's heated exchanges. But as the minutes passed in silence, he grew more and more impatient until finally his resolve to stay calm evaporated and he demanded, "Well?"

"Well what?" Micah replied quietly, wondering which particular bone Aaron wanted to pick with him first.

"Don't," Aaron snapped irritably. "Don't you dare play games with me..."

"I'm not, I'm just..."

"You're just playing for time..."

"No," he wasn't... well actually he was, he wanted this conversation over with but, at the same time, he was dreading it and even more worried about the fallout, "... Aaron, please, I don't want this to turn into an argument..."

"Why? You've already had two of those tonight, what difference would one more make? You know I wasn't all that surprised to see you in that creep's face…" He hadn't been, Micah was fearless, but he had been scared for him, "… but the other man, the vicar!" It reminded him of the time Micah had a pop at the Bishop, when he'd gotten all defensive over him. He hoped he wasn't the cause of this latest upset, "Micah..."

"That was the Very Reverend Roy Smart, a pompous, sanctimonious, narrow-minded ..."

Aaron had wanted to know about the other man first, his presence was of more concern to him, but Micah had suddenly launched into an angry tirade and he found himself listening, transfixed by Micah's rant, by his emotionally charged description of the vicar he'd had words with earlier. There was no mistaking the contempt he felt for the other man, it surprised Aaron, he knew Micah was passionate about many things but couldn't believe he could dislike someone so intensely.

Micah's diatribe finally at an end, he paused briefly to compose himself, "...I know it's wrong, Aaron but I just can't stand the man."

"He must have done something to make you feel that way." Aaron reasoned, something major had to have happened between them to make Micah feel so strongly.

"Yeah, he did. I know I should be more forgiving, practice what I preach. He's entitled to his opinions after all... but I've not been able to forget or forgive him."

His boyfriend had suddenly fallen silent and again seemed to be a million miles away, Aaron decided to push him some more, "Micah? What did he do?"

Shaken from his reverie, Micah heaved a weary sigh, he was tired and at a very low ebb emotionally now and the last thing he wanted was to dredge up the painful past. But Aaron had a right to know why he disliked Roy Smart so much and, more importantly, what had set the two of them arguing tonight... although he knew he'd have to be economical with the truth. He sank down onto a chair next to Aaron, he needed to sit down for this. He felt in need of something a little stronger than tea to drink too, but tea was going to have to be it. After tentatively sipping on the hot sweet brew, he started to talk.

"It's not what he did, it's what he said. When I first came to St. Mary's, there was a bit of a fuss made by some of the locals, they were a very vocal minority, Smart was a part of it, a big part."

"Because you were gay?" Aaron could think of no other reason but still he hoped he was wrong.

"Yeah, because I was gay. Smart was cordial in public, was diplomatic with his arguments. I was prepared to listen, to reason, to defend my position. But when we were alone, face to face, he made his real feelings known and in no uncertain terms. He told me I was an abomination in the eyes of God. And that hurt Aaron! It really wounded me! It shouldn't have, not with my faith, not with everything I believe, but it did. I suppose I expected better from one of my peers. At the very least, I expected him to be tolerant of something he didn't understand. But disgust was all I could see in his eyes, an all-consuming loathing for what I am, for the way God made me.

"I was with Matthew. We were in love and there was Smart telling me it was wrong, that I was sick, that I needed help! He said that everything I felt in my heart, in my soul was borne out of wickedness. He told me I was weak, that I should resist temptation, turn my back on the devil. I should have just laughed in his face, told him he belonged in the dark ages, maybe even pitied him, but I couldn't. I wasn't prepared to take crap like that off him. So, I fought back with words. I said a lot more than I should, I know, but like I said, I was hurting. I did put that confrontation behind me though, I moved on. The protests all came to nothing, Smart's objections were deemed irrelevant. I had the support of the Bishop, the majority of the parishioners and in the time since, I've proved my worth, Smart hates that I have, well let's face it, he hates me, he hates everything about me. He avoids me like the plague, only crawling out from under his rock when something happens, something he believes gives power to his convictions... like when Matthew became ill..."

Micah's voice had trailed off and Aaron knew he was lost in another memory. It gave him a little time to digest what he'd just been told, to try and get his head around it. He was struggling with it, with the emotions he'd just witnessed on Micah's face and the ones he himself had churning up inside. He was seeing a very different side to the Micah he knew, the vulnerable side. He'd never thought of him in that way before, he was strong, unshakable, and up until now, he'd drawn strength from Micah when he was at a low. He knew he needed to be the strong one now, and reached out wrapping his hand around his boyfriend's hand, squeezing it gently offering the support, the encouragement Micah needed to continue.

Micah shook his head at the memory that had gripped him; even now, he found it hard to believe that such a vile sentiment had passed the lips of a man of God. "Smart, he... he said Matthew's illness was a punishment from God. That he would suffer for his sins! I almost hit him that day; I wanted to and maybe if I hadn't believed so strongly that he was wrong, I would have. I just gave him another earful, what I hoped was food for thought, and then I walked away."

"You did the right thing." For Micah it was the right thing to do, Aaron was certain of that, and again it was a mark of his strength. He wouldn't have been able to walk away though, he'd have responded with his fists, he wouldn't have been able to stop himself.

"I thought it was at the time, I hoped what I'd said would have some kind of impact on him, but then tonight he... he thought he had another stone to cast in my direction. I came even closer to smacking him in that hateful mouth of his…"

"What do you mean another stone? What did he say?" Aaron's suspicions were aroused now; it had to have something to do with him.

"He's been told the same tale Milly was, the truth as Tom Bryant sees it." That was the bit Aaron did need to know.

That didn't come as any great surprise, they'd been expecting the word to spread, but there had to be more to it than that for Micah to react the way he did. "What did he say, Micah?"

"Oh, he started lecturing me about how sacred life is. You know you just can't reason with him, he won't acknowledge anyone's opinion but his own. There's not one ounce of give in the man, there was no attempt to understand, no compassion, just condemnation."

Aaron suddenly realised Micah wasn't telling him everything, that he was skirting around something, something that had made him see red earlier, and something Micah thought would affect him in the exact same way. "What else did he say?"

Micah hadn't wanted to go into detail, he certainly didn't want to tell Aaron everything that had passed between him and Smart, certainly not the part that had angered him so much, "That's about it…"

"No, there's more, I know there is. And anyway, I think I can guess the rest. He said the train slamming into Jackson's van was no accident, didn't he? That it was a punishment from God." He actually felt quite calm on stating that realisation, and couldn't understand why he hadn't felt a rush of anger; just a second ago, he could visualize a very violent response to Smart's words, but all he felt now was hurt. Hurt, not for himself or for Jackson but for Micah. He didn't have Micah's faith, but he did know just how very important it was to him, and he could see how something like this could wound him, even scar him.

"Yeah." Micah acknowledged quietly. He'd been enraged on hearing Smart's words but now, he just felt a sense of defeat. It had been another unbelievably callous attack, an attack on a very personal level. It had torn at his emotions, leaving them in turmoil, they'd taken a while to settle, and when they did, they'd left him drained, like he'd fought a physical battle and lost. "I can't believe that in this day and age, people like Smart still exist, that such beliefs are still held and can be wielded so cruelly by a supposedly good man."

"But like you said, he's in the minority; he's just one drop in the ocean." He'd been so confused about his sexuality, it terrified him so much that he'd refused to acknowledge let alone accept it. He'd been terrified of people finding out, of their reaction but, in the end, the only ones to have a problem with it had been his granddad and Wayne Dobson, but then Shadrach came from another generation and Dobson was just a brainless waste of space. Jackson had helped him deal with both of them, now he didn't care who knew or what they thought. Both his head and his heart told him that what he felt for another man was right and good, he knew the truth just like Micah did.

Micah had expected Aaron to take it badly, and he wouldn't have blamed him, but here he was taking it all in his stride, "I wasn't going to tell you."

"That was you getting all protective again." He couldn't help but smile, it was becoming a bit of a habit and one he appreciated, but still Micah couldn't protect him from all the hurt in the world, and he didn't need to, better they share it, "I thought we'd agreed, no keeping things to ourselves."

"Yeah, we did." Micah said realising his mistake.

"Did you tell anyone, I mean about what Smart said about Matthew?" Aaron hated the idea of Micah keeping it to himself.

"I couldn't tell Matthew, I had the Bishop on side but it would have been like telling tales out of school. I really just wanted to bury it, suffocate it… but of course, it wouldn't stay dead. My dad got it out of me in the end; he knew something was eating at me. It helped telling him and what he said helped even more but… well, he's never going to fully understand, is he? That one difference between us makes all the difference."

Aaron didn't want Micah feeling that sense of isolation anymore, "But I do! I understand…"

"I know you do." Micah said taking both Aaron's hands in his, he wished he'd shared it with him before now but there'd never been the right time, but now was… and it had brought them still closer emotionally.

Aaron liked this sense of closeness, of togetherness, but knew he couldn't hold onto the moment forever, life wouldn't let them, "Smart's going to kick up a fuss, isn't he?"

"I can guarantee it, but let him do his worst, it won't get him anywhere. The Bishop already knows and we have his support, Smart's just going to end up on the losing side again. Promise me you won't worry about it."

"I won't, I don't care what he thinks or what trouble he causes… but that other man, Micah, he does worry me. Who is he?"

Micah had forgotten all about Mellor, but typically, Aaron hadn't, and now he had more explaining to do…

TBC