Thank you ThankYouKayneVeryCool, Knightwing20042, DreamCatcher06 and Mossflower1234 for reviewing!
Guest Reviews:
Junebug (on chapter 28 as well as 36): "Um... ship name for Piper and Annabeth is Pipabeth. Wait... not even halfway? How long is this story, Flavia? And WHY have you not DIED yet? (Ms. Blondie deserves it. *cough* HUMAN SACRIFICE *cough* Other stuff I can't think of just now *cough* help please *cough*)" Pipabeth? Hm... it's almost as silly sounding as Pannabeth... And this story is seventy two chapters long. Wish me luck.
Didi: "Um..., Hi! Yes, excuse me, but it appears that I've lost all traces of main plot and I'm a little confused. Could you maybe guide me through this Sue mess? Without being stabbed by the all-powerful weapon that'll most likely take us to a crossover between MCGA and PJO, Ass Guard.P.S.
1.) let's hope that Hanna's in Arkham
2.) *half way there by Big Time Rush starts playing*" Why, of course I can explain the plot to you! So, Flavia is told she's a daughter of Artmeis and then Grover dies and they blame her because of some prophecy that has never been mentioned before and she's exiled (or maybe sent on a quest, it's unclear) and meets Alabaster and Nivo and then they go to Hades and then Alabaster shits magic and then they walk to some desert in California (maybe Death Valley) in less then a day and they dick around there for a while taking off their shirts and riding hores (also Ivy is there) and then Kornos shows up and threatens them but doesn't actually do anything, and then they nuke a city and find the Huntresses and fight Kornos again (he just keeps showing up) oh, and Alabaster dies, but he gets better, but then he dies again and then they find the Seven and they go to Camp Roman and fight Octavius and then they're mean to Cupid and then this chapter happens, also Flavia found out Kornos was sort of her dad. I hope that caught you up to speed! And I've just listen to a bit of Big Time Rush. I wouldn't wish that on anyone.
Guest: "Well, at least Flavia's cyber-bullying/love potion stunt came back to bite her in the ass, kinda. Good for 'Apherditi.'" I think Apherditi might be the second most effective antagonist in the entire story.
Ari: "Flavia you tangina you say you aren't a slut but you are. Sidenote if you don't get what tangina in my last comment means it's short for putangina a tagalog cuss word" Thanks for clearing that up. When I saw your first review I thought tangina was a misspelling of tangerine. I don't know why you would call someone a tangerine, but, I mean, hey, we all have our own little insults.
Guest: "I love your commenting! Also nice with the Latin." Thank you. I'm glad somebody noticed my Latin! I'm very proud of it, especially considering it was probably more grammatically accurate than I've ever been in class.
Strap in, people. This is a long one.
I asked Hailey to beta but she has a Flu so she texted me "no" but maybe sum other time First a dentist appointment, now the flu? Two chapters in a row? If that's not suspicious, I don't know what is so ignore teh mistakes too late, anyways I can make mistakes if I want CUZ U DONT OWN MY LIFES!1 And "u" don't own a spellcheck.
(Also what is brapple an gumblick, or is that prepful talk?) "Brapple an gumblick"? What the hell? What is that?! Is that even English?!
37….Captered By Kornos
Kornos was attacking the Roman camp in like 5 minutes so I need to be perpared! So I took all my wepons, I had Agamemmon an Telelmechus an Achilles an Draceenas doom, also the sword from Artmeis that now I named Ass GuardAssgard the sliver platred hand gun with silver bullits, an the bolt of lighting from Zeus. And she carries all these weapons how? She must have like, seven arms! Still makes more sense then Brapple and Gumblick. Now I was perpared for to Kill. But not yet cause firstly I put on armer. It was all made from sliver an lether an obsiden that'll shatter into a million sharp little pieces on impact that glintered black like teh moon on midnight snows. Does it only cover your mammaries like last time? It had things like boots with spikes for crushing emeny a helmit wit wicked eye holes that slantered all evil looking, a pity it was made of cardboard and tinfoil, but I wasnt acutely evil it was to scare monsters and Kronos.
Now sense I was deathly an sexly from the blessing from Artmeis I went to go see Hazel, she also was wearing armer made with lether an gold, she had a poisen knifes made from poisen rubes & dimends. Again, that'll shatter on impact. Diamonds are hard, yes, in terms of hard to scratch, but if you hit one really hard it'll smash into a million pieces, because it's so brittle. Same goes for rubies. She also looked deathly an sexly. Jason also was there, his armer was vilet (thats like dark purple not teh girl kind) also he had a helmit with a unicron horn sticking out from the front *snortles*, also steel wings sticking out from his back cause he could fly. Those wings'll just weigh him down and unbalance him. He had a empirical gold speer an he said "Hi Flaiva" all bronyly How do you say hello "bronyly"?! an I said "Hi Jason & Hazel"
Percy came and my heart stopped beatin You had a heart attack?! Yessssssssssss!cause he was wearing armer that was so hot, it was all black with green wafes of Posiden Percy! You're wearing waifs?! Thin small people?! And they belong to your dad?! Take those waifs off right now! God, you are so evil! cherning on his mighty stern. I was unaware that human anatomy included the backside of a boat. Or is Flavia just using nautical terms to describe Percy's backside... look, I can only ponder one question of grammar insanity at once, and right now I'm pretty damn stuck on Brapple and Gumblick! He had Riptide too an it was a sword not a pen, an it was made from empirical gold *cough* celestial bronze *cough* that glintered brightfully. He wasn't wearin a helmit so I could see his dark hair hanging over his sorrowful green eyes that were teh color of the storming sees. So, he's going off into a melee with his hair falling in his eyes, obstructing his vision?! Man, between him, Flavia's obsidian armor, Hazel's gem sword and Jason's "wings", this is poorest prepared army ever! And how did they get all this heavy-ass, complex armor on in five minutes?!
"Hey Artmeis said you can be my bf but firstly she must disgust it with the other goddeses," I explaned to him, I could see his heart melt sifly threw his dark eyes. You know, the casual way she says this makes me realize just how spectacularly useless Percy really is in the plot. He's barely there and he does absolutely nothing! Jason does more to advance the "story" than him!
"Lets kiss," He said to celberate, but I said "Omg shut up here comes Kronos!" my eyes slittened for to kill, all I could see now was RED cause from blood lusting. And this is different from normal how?
Kornos was standin there all shining an goldened in his armer, How'd you know what color it was if all you could see was red, huh?! his eyes flashed me with wickedfulness. "You wont kill me cause I'm ur dad" He gleered meanly. He, Kornos? How come you didn't tell her this before? Like, if he had just said this the first time they met, before Artemis could give her the whole truth, you could've manipulated her into joining you. God, this might be the dumbest, most poorly put together retcon ever. And I read comic books.
"What, Flavia is this true?!" Yelled Hazel.
I hanged my head "Yes but its acutely a lie, at this point I feel like I should just have a counter for every bad oxymoron , Artmeis is still a virgen but her hate was so strong it over flowed an I was born"
"But this means he is not acutely ur dad" Jason explaned wisely. Thank you, Jason, voice of reason.
The wisdom from this sunck into me You are such an idiot to not have even entertained this idea before. an I drew my sword, "Perpare to die in hell, Kornos!" That boast sucked. Might I suggest "Prepare to meet Kali, in hell!" instead? Or if you're not a fan of Hinduism, "prepare to meet Mother Teresa, in hell!"
Kornos laughed even tho he was deep down scared off me, he said teh word of Death! A deimgod who was standin there garbed his throte & heart an crumbled on teh ground, he was…..dead! (cause the word of Death!) Wait, so, what was that random demigod doing there, and why come the word of death only killed one person?! Isn't it supposed to kill everyone who hears it?! Or is it like "avada kedavra", where it's a spell and you have to aim it?! Well why didn't you aim it AT FLAVIA?! EXPLAIN, DAMMIT! EXPLAIN! AHHHHHHH! *inner brain explosion*
"Ha ha now hes effing dead" Flamed Kornos, he got ready to say the word again but this time I said teh word to dafeat the word of Death! *broken sobbing* Kornos screemed angrifully. "What did you say u pep?!"
"It means now ur word of death doesn't work anymore" I laughed, I drew my sword an swung it at his head so it would kill him, but he cheated cause he ran out from the way. Dodging sharp objects in a fight to the death is not cheating. Kornos pulled out his lawnmowersythe and said "Now I will cut off ur head, and Percy Jason & Hazels head also as well!"
"U wish bro" "Bro"?! What are you, a frat boy?I said, I threw my hand gun at him That's not how you use it. but he ducked an it hit a moniter and bounced harmlessly off because it's not the gun itself that hurts it's the bullets it shoots you idiot you just threw away a useful weapon.
I got all ready to stab him with Ass Guard Assgard but suddenly he grabed Percy an pointed his lawnmowersythe at his neck "If you try to stab me I will cut his neck and he will die, then you will have no bf an you will be a virgen forever like ur patetic mother"
My eyes blazed wrathly "Never" I said. Never as in, "I'll never surrender" or never as in "I'll never be a virgin forever"?
"Then throw all ur wepons away or he will die when I count to 3" The second one. Of course. *cough slut she's a slut cough* Said Kornos, he started to count "1, 2"
"Fine" I lied so I threw all my wepons at Kronos! Weeeelll... he did only say to throw your weapons. He never said in what direction. But Percy is totally dead now from all the pointy things hitting him and Kornos. But he ran all cowardfully, so they only hit him in teh legs. And this is why you don't go to the Prometheus School of Running Away From Things. If he'd just moved to the side he wouldn't have gotten it all all. He fell down on the ground as garvity clamed him Percy kicked him an Kornos let go of Percy an Percy was free! Why did Percy have to kick Kornos to free himself? Wouldn't Kornos have let go and started, I don't know, clutching his knee and screaming "Oh God, the agony!" when the weapons hit him? But suddenly Kornos said "Monsters help me" And like 50 monsters jumped out of the bushes an grabed us! So. When Flavia, Alabaster and Nico (I'm not counting Ivy because she never was that useful) are attacked by an endless barrage of monsters they kill the crap out of all of them, but when about 50 pull a sneak attack on Flavia, Hazel, Percy and Jason, it's game over?! The Gen 2 Flavanauts suck.
He took us to his evil hide out that was teh temple of Kornos outside the Roman camp, in the forest so deep no one ever saw it. Then he chaned me, Percy, Hazel, an Jason to teh wall an he took a very big club all covered with sharp spikes "Now u will suffer" He yelled.
"Why" Said Jason. Not very bright, are ya Jason?
"Cause I will torture you" Laughed Kornos.
"Too bad Leo an Frank will still save us" I explaned. Oh yeah. Those two. I thought they'd been Chuck Cunninghamed out along with Nico because FxxMoonlitexx got too much backlash for her (potentially accidental) racism.
"No cause they will be dead soon" He said all mystrously.
"Why! what do you mean?" I dimanded.
And like an idiot, he spills his entire plan. "I told 6000 monsters That seems like overkill. 50 took out the four most powerful demigods in the world. I think like, two can completely obliterate a camp made up entirely of unnamed characters. to dig a tunnel under teh gates to the Roman camp, in 1 day they will bust out from under ground an slay all the deimgods an I will rule the Roman camp, this is my secret plans" Said Kronos. Well it's not a secret anymore dumbass!
I knew I needed to warn the Roman camp before this happened, I had to escape but how, Kornos took all our wepons an locked them up in a box!
I had no chose, I must repeel to Luke if he was still alive inside Kornos, "Luke dont kill us, remember u were my bf!" tears withered down my cheeks as I remembered teh memorys. Tears that whither. Such an apt description for obvious crocodile tears. Bitch, you've barely mentioned Luke in all 37 chapters, you cared about him about as much as you care about everyone else. And you care about no one.
"Luke is dead" Said Kornos "Now Im just usin him for his body" Um, Korny boy? I don't think that came out like you meant it. Or maybe it did... this is Moondaughter after all...
"It makes no diffrence" I said all sexly, I was trying to deduce him in case you cant tell by now. *cough slut she's a slut cough* "Untie me an we can make out, u can kill my friends & everything" (But it was a lie, I was going to kill him firstly) No sh*t Sherlock.
Kornos shook his head "There is no love in my heart,just evil! So I cant make out anyways Plus, I mean, I consider myself your dad. I may eat my children, but I'd never sink so low as to %*# one of them."
He took something from Jason's pocket, it was a futtershy plushy! How did that fit in Jason's pocket?! "Octavius will sacrafice this an then he will sacrafice you an read teh message of the gods in your liver an stuff"Sooooo... when Kornos and Octavius- Who is here somehow despite being a slave in the last chapter, I guess that surrender was just a ruse and he really didn't join the Dork Side! Hooray!- kill people, it's pure evil. When you do it, it's okay? Somehow? Anyway, double standard much?!
Octavius came an he was holding a knife, my teeth gritted cause he was my second worse enemy not counting Kornos. Bitch please. He's the personification of your "fanbase" come to exact our vengence for us. He is most definitely your worst enemy. Octavius gleered an cut the fulttershy plushys throte, stuffing dripped out like blood! Again?! This is the second time Octavius has cut up a stuffed animal and you act like he strangled a fricken puppy! It's just fabric and fluff. Get over it. Tehn he went to Jason, I knew I must act! But I was chaned to the wall, how could I do this? I had a wise idea all suddenly. I tripped Octavius with my feet, with all my strangth I broke one of my hands out from the chanes an I garbbed his knife an pointed it at him "Let us go Kornos or I kill ur minyon" I yelled. Well why didn't you do that before?!
Kornos had no chose, he untied me an Percy an Jason an Hazel. Wow. Kronos really is a better person than Flavia. When one of his mortal minions is threatened, he complies with the ransomers orders and tries to save him. When Flavia own boyfriend is being threatened, she attacks anyway despite the fact he'll must probably die! He would've, if Kronos hadn;t moved out of the way! Kornos really is the good guy! Tehn I laughed, I plunged the knife in Octavius's guts, he desreved it! (its not a socapath cause it was 4 the great good, anyways he didnt die all the way) Yup, nothing says "I'm not a sociopath and I'm only seriously injuring him for the greater good" like laughing like a maniac while you perform said injury. Then I pointed the knife at Kornos all bad ass, "If you chase us you will suffer the wrath of the goddesess!" Pfft. You think that dinky little knife is gonna do anything? Ya know, maybe the Waterbender or the Mist Master or the goddamned demigod of thunder should actually do something that isn't stand around looking pretty for once. Just a thought.
"Never" Said Kornos.
I swunged my sword at him, I knew now this was a dule!
Good God this chapter was boring and long and I'm really surprised she didn't split it into two (although I'm glad because that's one less chapter to review). I need a goddamn break! And will someone please tell me what Brapple and Gumblick is?!