This is really weird, but I actually enjoyed Church yesterday. And yes, they let me go. I told them I was going to confess, and I did, just to make them happy.
Then, after, they let us to go to McDonald's. It was awesome.
But while we were at the Church… it was just weird. I was hanging with Brendon in this empty room, and he just turns to me and hugs me. He held me and murmured my name several times before pulling away and shutting the door, so we were completely locked together.
He went back up to me, placed his hands on my shoulders, and asked me if I could see Frank anywhere in here. I took a quick look around, and then shook my head, because I really didn't see him, and I felt a bit sad. Brendon could see Ryan, but then I remembered that Brendon was a bit odd, so I didn't think much of it.
The thing I did find out of character for the freak was that he held me again, whispered in my ear, "Ryan gave me permission", and then proceeded to kiss me open-mouthed on my bottom lip with way too much fuckin' tongue. Seriously, he just planted it there and just started licking my lips.
And all I did was just stand there with wide eyes.
I really think Brendon needs help. He said Ryan visits him, but when I asked Tom, he said they don't allow visitors when you first get here. You have to wait until a few months pass by, and then they think about it. Tom also told me that he knows some of the patients that's been here for two or even more years who haven't had a single visitor, and that makes me really sad.
Doesn't their family care about them?
Don't they have friends?
A girlfriend?
A boyfriend?
Children?
All this made me think back to Frank.
And it caused me to wrap my arms around Brendon and kiss him back.
My reasoning?
Frank gave me permission.