A/N: I just though I'd make this chapter soft and pretty for the hell of it because, well, I felt like a soft and pretty kind of chapter.
Black Sunrise
Chapter Thirty-Six: Acceptance
Bunny rubbed her thumb over the top of her daughter's hand. Lilian and secured the use of another chair that a nurse had brought into the room for her and she sat on the other side of Bulma's bed with her other hand over the younger woman's.
"I have heard so many wonderful things about you my dear..." This comment caused Bulma to blush slightly. "And you've done something to my son that I never thought I'd get the chance to see. You've changed him in so many different ways, it's good to know that I don't have to worry that every time the phone rang it would be Vegeta asking for one of us to come and bail his sorry ass out of jail."
"I'm sure that must have been awful."
"I'm so glad that I didn't have that problem with Bulma. She was always quite the wonderful girl growing up and well, we've had our differences, but who doesn't with their parents right?"
"Exactly." Lilian smiled at Bunny.
Everyone was quiet for a few moments, Bulma becoming tired with every passing minute, but not wanting to sleep for fear of missing something. She missed the presence of Vegeta beside her, his calming hand on hers, the strength that he was always willing to give to her in any way. Bulma wondered where he had gotten off to with her father. It had all come as a huge surprise to her when she saw her parents, and now there she was sitting (almost) in her bed with both her mother, and Vegeta's mother on either side. It was nice to see that the woman that had given birth to Vegeta was a kind and compassionate woman, with a growing bulge all of her own.
"So," Lilian smiled breaking the silence. "I hear you're having twins as well?"
"Yes. You too?"
"Yes." Lilian laughed and winked at Bunny. "The joys of having children. What wonderful things they are. And speaking of children, your daughter Rayne, what a blessedly perfect young lady she is."
"Yes. She is." Bulma smiled softly and then felt a pang of guilt race through her body. She knew that she shouldn't have left her daughter, shouldn't have left Vegeta alone while she went and fought her demons herself. Help was always welcome and yet it seemed that even to herself, she balked away from it.
"And your new babies will be just as wonderful. You've raised your daughter just beautifully Bulma. I cannot be any prouder of you." Bunny smiled, blinking through the tears that threatened to spill over the lower lids of her eyes. Sighing, she began to fuss with her daughter's red curls, shaking her head and tsking gently. "When will you ever learn to leave your hair be?"
"I just don't know. It's been so easy for everyone to come and find me, I thought that I'd try and fight back by making it harder for them."
Bunny shook her head and squeezed her daughter's hand gently. "Bulma, you don't have to run anymore. You have people that love you, that'll do anything to keep you safe. Like your father and I."
"Bryce and I as well. Keisha, Juu, Star..."
"Vegeta..." Bunny wiggled her eyebrows.
"There are so many people that you can turn to for help. We're all willing to do whatever it takes to make sure that your nightmares no longer haunt you. I know that my son loves you and he has never loved anyone in his life. You have done something to him that I never thought would be possible. He is more caring, more compassionate, more understanding. He no longer puts himself first but your daughter. Everything circles around her. Every waking moment is for Rayne. And for you. If you only knew how many hours he sat on a chair in front of the picture that you painted for him and cried. Which, by the way, I have to say I'm disgustingly jealous. I want all of your originals and you went and painted a masterpiece without letting anyone else see it."
Bulma laughed softly and shrugged her shoulders. She knew that the painting of Vegeta and Rayne was the best that she had ever, and probably would ever do. But there was something more then just paint going onto the canvas. Determination and her love went into every stroke of the brush, every hour that she spent lingering over the minute details, mixing the perfect colors to make the wonderful match so that one looking at it would think that they were looking at a blown-up photograph and then be amazed when they learned that it was all done with oils. "I shall just have to go and paint you one, when I get better and I feel up to it."
Bunny looked at Lilian and tilted her head off to the side. "Your son, I haven't had the pleasure of sitting down and talking with him heart to heart, but does he love Bulma like you say he does?"
Lilian met Bunny's eyes and nodded her head. "He loves her more. He would kill for her, die for her. Do anything for." The last sentence was said directly into Bulma's eyes.
And it was then that Bulma knew that there was no leaving Vegeta ever again. He was the grounding point in her life, the person that she needed to spend hours upon hours with every day. The person that whose arms she could fall asleep in and wake up in without any qualms. It was in that moment she knew that she was Vegeta's. Wholly. Always had been and always will be in the years to come. She closed her eyes for just a moment, and instantly fell into a deep slumber, a single tear slipping out from under the fan of blue lashes. She didn't feel someone pressing the button beside her bed to make it so that she was lying flat, nor did she feel her mother pulling the blanket put and over her shoulders, tucking Bulma in like she had liked it when she was a little girl.
"Sweet dreams." Bunny whispered, pressing a kiss onto her daughter's forehead.
When she awoke, Bulma was alone and in dire need to get up and out of bed. Looking around to make sure that there was no one else in the room with her, she slowly slid the blanket off of her legs and pushed herself into a sitting position with her good arm. Giving herself a few moments to let the wave of dizziness pass, she gingerly put her feet on the floor and stood there for a minute while she gave her legs the chance to get used to her weight again.
And what weight she had lost became apparent to her as she looked at her hands and bared legs. Disgustingly pale and thin, Bulma hated the look and for an instant she was deathly afraid for the twins that were growing in her womb. Taking a deep breath, she moved forward slowly, one baby step at a time towards the window. It took her almost 5 minutes to walk across the room herself, but when she got to look out the window for the first time in what felt like years, she was glad for the workout.
The moon was full, and the stars were millions in the inky black sky. Bracing herself against the window frame, Bulma wrapped her arms around her middle and rested her head against the window. Her life was changing in more ways then she cared to count, but maybe it was time that she stopped running and met her fears head on. With help of course. The city was quiet and it was like the whole world was silent enough to let her think everything through to the last, smallest detail without anything disturbing her.
But she should have brought something to cover herself with. She was cold, after spending what felt like years in that hospital bed, her body wasn't used to having nothing covering her skin other then the thin nightgown that someone had placed her in.Bulma was so wrapped up in her thoughts that she didn't hear the door to her room open and then shut again behind the person that walked in.
"What are you doing out of bed?" A gruff voice asked from behind her. Gasping, Bulma turned around too quickly, losing the grip that she had on her weakened limps. A small scream escaped her lips as she fell forwards, her legs staying where they had been for the last few minutes, while the rest of her moved forward.
Vegeta's face paled as he saw her and faster then he thought it were even possible, he threw himself at the falling Bulma and caught her just as she was about to land on the floor. "Woah there." He stammered, helping Bulma back up once more. "You shouldn't be out of bed."
"Your breath stinks."
"I went drinking with our fathers."
"Drinking." She said bitterly. "You always drink when a person needs you the most." She tried to push Vegeta away but he held onto her a little bit tighter every second.
"What the hell is that supposed to mean?" Although his brain had been foggy a few moments ago, seeing her fall towards the ground had sobered him up right away.
"You know exactly what it means Vegeta. You weren't there the last time I needed you, because you were at the bar getting drunk with some little whore in your lap. Don't deny it either. 18 and Chi-Chi told me that she saw that hussy spread all over you like cream cheese to a bagel. And you weren't trying to get her off of you either."
"That was ages ago Bulma. You cannot hold that against me. I was stupid. You were hurt and I should have been there for you. But I didn't know how to be. You're the only thing in my life I'm so sure about, and yet so unsure about. You're everything to me and I want to be everything to you. I love you so much it's sickening sometimes..."
"And yet when I needed you now, you're out getting drunk with my dad."
"Hey, my dad had a hand in it. They said that I needed to relax."
"Relax. Glad to know that there is such a thing for people."
"Fuck you Bulma."
She yanked her arms out of his hold and turned around to once more look out the window. Why couldn't she just keep her temper down to a minimum when Vegeta was around? "No Vegeta, that's already bene done remember? That's how babies get made."
Vegeta growled and force Bulma to turn around. She winced when he put pressure onto her wounded shoulder and he saw it. "Oh fuck. Baby, I'm so sorry..."
"Don't you Baby me Vegeta. Get out of my room."
"No."
"GET OUT!"
"No. You have to fucking listen to me."
"Fuck you." Her blue eyes glared hard into his dark ones.
And then all of a sudden, his hands ran up her arms slowly, bring careful this time to avoid the bandage that was on her shoulder, ran up her neck and then gently cupped her face between with palms. "Bulma. I love you. Alright? Can you understand that? I shouldn't have gone out that night, I know I should have stayed at home with you. I know this and there isn't a day that goes by that I don't kick myself in the shins for it, but it happened and it happened a long time ago. I couldn't stay and look at you bleeding in bed, being sick. Being hurt. I couldn't stand to know that the dogs gave me the warning, I just didn't listen to them. I know that Cara was a bad person when they wouldn't stop barking, but I just didn't heed the warning. It's all my fault that you got hurt. It should have been me and not you. Do you understand that now? Can you accept the fact that I take full responsibility for what had happened to you?"
"It still doesn't make it alright that you went out and ditched me when I needed you Vegeta. I needed your strength to help me through that first night. I needed to know that you were there for me even when I wasn't awake. I needed you there and you let me down!"
"I know Bulma! Believe me, I fucking know! There is nothing I wouldn't do to make it possible to go back in time and be there for you that night. Hell, I should have thrown that bitch out on her nasty ass as soon as she set foot in my house. But I didn't. I didn't because she was your friend. I didn't because I didn't want you any more hurt with me then you already were. I couldn't stand all of those horrible things that I had ever said to you."
"Yeah. Right." She could no longer bare to look into his eyes so she turned hers away from his and stared at a spot over his shoulder.
It felt as if a knife was thrust into his heart the moment she broke eye contact with him. Why wasn't this turning out to be the way that he wanted it to be? Why was it that every time he was around her, anger boiled into his veins and his temper grew an even shorter fuse? "You don't believe me?" The pain in his voice forced Bulma to look at him once more, her eyes shining thickly with unshed tears.
Two drops fell from either eye, rolling down her cheeks almost perfectly in time with the other and it caused Vegeta's heart to shatter. "Oh god. Please don't cry." His voice was thick with emotion and with nimble thumbs, Vegeta brushed away the tears that wet her flesh.
"Oh Vegeta." Bulma whispered and then threw herself against his chest with what strength she had left. "I'm so scared."
His hands slid down her back and he wrapped the weeping woman in his arms. Her head was settled against his shoulder and he didn't move an inch. "I know." He whispered back, a hand rubbing slow circles against the small of her back, trying to soothe the woman against his chest. "I know pet. I know you're scared."
"I...I ju..just don't know wha...what to do anymore." She hiccuped, fingers clutching desperately at his shirt. "I'm so scared...so scared."
"I'll protect you. I won't let anything hurt you anymore Bulma. You are my life, if something happened to you I don't know what I would do. There is nothing in this world, or any other that will hurt you ever again."
"I...I love you Vegeta. I love you so much. I don't want you to get hurt. Do you understand why I left?"
"Yes my love. I understand. Fear took you away from me. Love brought you back. You're in my clutches now and don't think that I'll ever let you out of them again. I'll protect you. I'll protect Rayne. I'll protect those babies growing in you...fuck Bulma. I'm going to be a daddy again. This time I'll be there to help you through it all. I won't leave you alone for one minute unless I really have too. And even then, I'll be gone for a minute."
"I don't want you to ever leave me. I've been so foolish, so stupid."
Vegeta laughed softly and moved a hand up to stroke the hair at the back of her head. "We both have. We've fought each other tooth and nail to get away, but we keep taking two steps back to where we were. We're perfect for each other Bulma. Never forget that."
"It's just so hard to go and ... to just, try to go on with life when there's so much happening and after me. I cannot help the fact that I don't want anything to happen to you, to our daughter, to our babies..."
"Let me be there for you Bulma. Let me take away some of your fears and help you fight them."
She was quiet for a long moment, but Vegeta knew that she hadn't fallen asleep, for her fingers reflexively gripped at the front of his shirt. "I'm so scared for you..."
"I love you."
"I don't want you to get hurt."
"I love you."
"I don't want to be alone anymore..." And it was with that last comment that she slumped forward and passed out from lack of energy.
Vegeta had known it was coming due to the weakened tone of her voice, and yet it came as a surprise to him when she fainted, her little form so light against his. Careful not to jar her wounded arm, he slipped his arms around her, cradling her to his chest, and walked slowly to the bed and placed her in it.
Kicking out of his shoes, he pulled back the blanket ever so slightly and crawled in beside Bulma. It was as if they had ever slept apart, Bulma turned her form around, head tucked under his chin while her hand clutched at his shirt. Gathering Bulma close and pulling the blanket up over them both, Vegeta, for the first time in a very long time, fell asleep without the fear of nightmares to wake him.
Nightmares of Bulma dead.
She was sleeping softly in his arms, and with a soft kiss to her forehead, he fell asleep.