Hey Everyone!
I know I am the absolute worse at updating, but man oh man life has thrown me through a loop! Started a new job, graduated university, and I'm currently not trying to lose my head with my brand-new hectic schedule. But the only thing keeping me sane is this story, so even though I may take a few months to update, I'll do it.
And oh man, this one is a good and long one.
I still get people following and favouriting this story, and let me tell you guys, it fills me with such joy that I can't even properly describe it to you. Special Special thanks always go out to my reviewers, River, LeopardFeather, fishtrek, gossamermouse101, Authora97, OneWhoReadsTooMuch, .2018, Momochan77, Alice-Ann Wonderland, bonialito, Princess Peach Pudding, Malkah5967, AnonReviewer, asiastana, , and vexwhite. Some of you have been with me from the beginning, and my heart always warms when I see you guys leave a review. I feel like I have a special connection with you all, and seeing your familiar names come across my screen, it always makes me want to keep writing. So thank you, for constantly keeping me writing!
Okay, not keeping you waiting, go off! Enjoy!
P.S. Disclaimer - I own nothing relating to CM
Spencer couldn't remember the last time he sat in Garcia's office.
He (somehow) had forgotten the little green frog hiding along her pink stars and blush fuzzies. She moved around the items on her desks all the time, but Spencer noticed every item had been moved, indicating to him that it was quite a long time since he spent a moment sitting in the lair, enjoying the wonderful company that was the one and only Penny Garcia. The second Spencer got into the building, he was swarmed with love and concern from the entire team. Hotch came out for a moment to update Spencer on who they had to track down Elena and Emily's whereabouts, David following him. Garcia enveloped him in the largest hug she could muster up. JJ, although embracing him, seemed to be lost in her own thoughts. He wanted to address JJ's concern, to let her know she wasn't at fault for Ellie's sudden departure, but Spencer couldn't miss another second not finding his Professor. He went straight to Garcia, reciting everything he possibly could remember that would lead to finding Elena.
After a long stretch of searches, and coming up with nothing, Garcia left the office to 'grab some fuel for those skinny bones', as she put it. Spencer was now left alone in his thoughts; the only person listening wasn't an actual person.
"Where is she, Dex?"
The dog's instinct was to place his head on Spencer's knee. He could see the dog was in pain, that he missed his owner dearly, and wanted her back as soon as possible.
He could easily understand what that felt like.
There was an aching feeling in his stomach. But not a slow burn, more like a deep clawing within his insides, telling him to run to her, to propel his entire body towards getting to Elena physically. He couldn't stand still. His whole body wanted to shake, to find her, to do something that was progressive in locating his heart. Spencer never felt like this before, this raw desire to scream at the top of his lungs, to punch something (he wanted to punch someone in particular—Bennett), to burn down the entire world if that meant it created a direct path to Elena. He had never felt this anger before. Yes, he was angry at Elena for just up and leaving, but he was even angrier Bennett, at the universe for that matter, for giving him someone that was so wonderful and cared for him so deeply, just for her to be torn away from him.
She was now gone for fifty six hours.
The team was exhausted, turning over every rock, leaf, twig that they could find.
He was beat, and scared, and couldn't collect his thoughts properly.
But most importantly, he missed her.
And he was deeply terrified he was going to miss her for the rest of his life.
How could he live not having Elena wake up next to him again? To not be able to watch her dance around in her kitchen, singing to her favourite boyband in her fluffy slippers and Doctor Who shorts, all while cooking her beloved cookies? It gave Spencer a horrible, desperate feeling. Yes, he survived after Maeve, and found someone special once again. But Elena was a life force, Elena had flipped everything he knew upside down, dissected it to every degree, and blew it out of every parameter he created. She taught him how to open up again, how to be with someone wholeheartedly.
And now…
Now she could wind up dead.
He couldn't bear to look at the letter again. Spencer didn't know why he brought her letter with him, but it was in his hands when he got into the car. Leaving the piece of paper on the desk, he reached into his pocket, pulling out his wallet. Going into one of the slots, he pulled out one of his business cards. While Spencer gave out his card almost every day, this one card was special. It was from the first day he met Elena, where she asked him if he had a number to be reached at, where she took one look at it, wrote out her number, and was the first person to ever give him back something that once belong to him.
"Call me if you need any more information. I'll call you if I remember something."
From the moment he met her, he couldn't stop staring at her, couldn't figure out how her eyes could look so warm or how her laugh was so infections he couldn't help but feel giddy. He was enamored by her light, but only got to see how bright she truly was when she accepted him for who he was. She saw something in him that he didn't know he had but had desperately wanted someone to notice. She cared for him so much that she was willing to put her life on the line for him.
"It was nice meeting you, Spencer."
It was more than nice, it was world-flipping, down right terrifying and Spencer loved every minute of meeting her and knowing her and caring for her and—
He jumped out of his seat.
He knew it.
Spencer knew what his feelings were for Ellie.
She felt the same, and yet somehow he wasn't able to say it as freely as Elena could.
But now… now that she wasn't here, now that he realized he didn't say it, now that she was somewhere on the other side of the world and risking her life, made him understand the gravity of the situation. She had said that it was okay he never said it, but it didn't feel okay. Although he never let Elena feel anything less than what she deserved, he regretted not being able to say it.
I love her.
He placed the card back in its rightful place.
He leaned back deeply into his seat, willing himself to not lose his mind.
I love her.
It was haunting him now, the one thought that would never escape.
But he knew it was at his own hand.
I love her.
And she may never hear me say it.
[ + ]
"You said his name was Tikvah? T-I-K-V-A-H?"
The entire team was in the building, on red alert. Every single member of the team was highly focused, even though they were riddled with emotion. Garcia had taken both Reid and his new four-legged sidekick to her office, where they were attempting to identify any modes of transportation that could have possibly aided Prentiss and Lou. Hotch had every phone he owned glued to him, calling in every available (and not-available) favour he had. Rossi, who had spoken first, was holding a file while leaning against Morgan's desk off to the side, while Derek sat in his seat, with multiple files falling from his desk, onto his lap.
JJ was leaning on another desk, positioning her body directly across Rossi and Morgan. Her thumbnail had been caught between her teeth for the past three hours, her focus completely not within the current situation after trying to hide her emotions. The team noticed JJ kept getting lost in thought, and while it would have hindered the investigation, the team was going no where with finding Lou. Allowing JJ to process her emotions would only benefit her and the team. They noticed how hard JJ was taking the situation, almost feeling responsible, for whatever reason. They knew JJ would focus when needed, but for now, the two men let her be.
Morgan responded to Rossi's question. "Reid never explicitly spelled his name out, but I'm assuming that's how it's spelt."
Dave gave an interesting look when holding the file in his hand. Garcia was quite thorough when creating the file from the information Reid finally produced. They were looking in-depth on Lou's mysterious friend who she knew very well, and the knowledge of not knowing all of Lou's connections caused the doctor to be at a disadvantage. Rossi could almost physically feel the kid's pain. The last time Reid was this quiet, he had lost his first love. Maeve's death was traumatic for the kid, and losing her almost cost Reid his sanity. But the situation with Lou was completely different; there was more at cost. Reid got to truly taste what it was like to be held by a love one, to feel their affection more than over the phone. Losing Lou would be more painful to the kid than anything he ever experienced.
Losing Lou would be painful to the team as well.
Rossi fell back to his original train of thought. "And Reid said Lou knew him personally? For multiple years?"
"Says Little Lou told him that he was the son of a Saudi Arabian Ambassador."
A smile came on the man's face. "I thought I recognized the name. Malachi Tikvah, one of the most powerful men in the Middle East."
"How powerful?" Morgan questioned.
"Sheiks move mountains for Tikvah. He's a respected man among many high-ranking officials."
"No wonder Lou called his son. If she needed reinforcements, she had all the connections she needed."
Rossi closed the file in his hand, placing it on the table. "Would this Tikvah know where Lou is?"
"Reid told me that Zion doesn't know… said Lou kept that information from him. Then again, the last time I trusted a spy, I thought she died."
Dave looked at Morgan. He could see that the worry Derek felt was only affecting his anger that much more. He was most likely mad at Lou, but definitely mad at himself. David knew how personal Morgan took the whole situation, being hard on himself after not seeing the signs that Lou was going to run and leave no trace of where she went.
Derek's brotherly nature always made him protective over Lou (although he knew Lou could take care of herself, he always wanted to be to protect her blind side). She was putting herself at risk, not only for Reid, but for him as well, and to have someone so new into the family risk their life to protect the others made it that much harder on Morgan. He wanted to be proud of her, and he wanted to smack her upside the head at the same time.
"You holdin' up, Derek?" Rossi asked, knowing the comment the agent made was on purpose.
Morgan was going to open his mouth to answer, to tell his friend Dave that it may look like he's holding up but he's truly not. But he knew how his face looked in that moment. He didn't have the strength to cover up what he was hiding.
"When could she have done this?" Derek threw all the papers in his hand on the desk, not caring if it caused half of them to fall all over the sides of the desk. "I've seen Lou create four-paged lists of special date nights for Reid. It's a thoroughly detailed itinerary of every event planned for the night, down to the bathroom breaks, and she usually takes three weeks to figure out one night."
He shook his head. "Between Bennett showing up in front of her house, to her leaving, when could she have thought that this was a good idea to come up with this plan?"
Dave shrugged. "Maybe the night Bennett came back? She could have been hypothesizing then."
It was a soft pause in the conversation, until JJ finally spoke.
"It was when Bennett approached Henry on the sledding hill."
The two men looked at JJ, who didn't deviate her focus from the spot on the floor she had been staring at. "Bennett had only approached her and Spencer before then, Noah's focus was solely on her. The second the attention shifted from her to Henry, even in the slightest, Lou went on red alert, put any plan she had been creating into action. Bennett had drawn his attention to not only Spencer, but to Henry… and she knew she had to leave because of it."
The blonde looked to her friends, betraying all the drained energy and raw emotion she had on her face. "Lou adores Henry like he was her own. She takes care of him, she teaches him, she loves Henry. Bennett threatening him made her realize that Noah would take out anyone he thought was family to her, even if it was a child."
JJ couldn't contain her emotions anymore. "She was trying to keep my everyone she loves safe, Derek. Including you."
She caught the few tears that managed to escape, taking a deep breath to collect herself. She found Dave's comforting hand on her shoulder as she sniffled. "I will never forgive myself if we can't keep her safe."
"We will," Dave comforted, turning his head towards Morgan as he spoke. "We're gonna bring her home, don't you two worry. Right now, we need to focus on finding where she is."
"Need any help?"
The three of them turned to find a heartbroken, dishevelled redhead, on the verge of a mental breakdown. Caroline was a wreck, not even caring about her appearance. She practically dragged her purse along as JJ went to her, consoling her new friend. more tears rolling down Linnie's face.
"Caroline, I'm so sorry."
Caroline pulled away from JJ, taking a moment to wipe her tears. "Oh, it's not your fault. It's no one's fault, not even Lou's, to be honest." She looked around the room. "Where's the Doc? I should see him. He sounded broken on the phone."
Morgan spoke softly. "He's with Garcia now. He brought along Dexter."
She nodded. "I figured the pup was coming along, whether or not he was asked to."
The small joke made the atmosphere a bit lighter.
Dave indicated for Linnie to have a seat on one of the chairs. "Reid needs a bit of time before he can be out."
Caroline nodded, completely understanding.
"I don't know how she could do this to him. Well, I mean technically I know why she did and it was, I think, for a good reason, I swear, I still could kick her fucking ass right now," her voice was stern, but she couldn't stop the water works from working overtime. "I knew this was gonna happen. I felt her almost ready to leave, you know? She just was jumpy lately. And how… how could I have not seen what was happening? She's my best friend in the whole world and I didn't do anything to stop her."
She took a deep breath, shaking her hands out in an effort to rid herself from any and all emotion. "No, no. I can't be a mess right now, I'm here to help. I can get angry at her when I see her face to face."
"Good mentality," Dave said in admiration. "What do you have?"
"Not much, just I know how Lou works. She's like her dad, in the sense that they both don't do anything irrational unless it's for a really good rational reason."
The redhead paled, realizing something quite important.
"Did anyone call Lou's dad?"
Morgan and JJ looked to one another, catching Dave in the middle.
"I'll take that as a no."
She sighed, running a hand through her hair. It had already gotten to brushing her shoulders, her mind wandered to realizing she needed a haircut. What an odd thing to think of when finding her.
"But then again, Lou's not rational right now. You guys know about Antoinette, yeah?"
Their silence answered her question.
"You don't go after Lou's family." Linnie carried on without missing a beat. "When she was younger, she only had her parents, and her grandma, and me… And we were her entire world. I mean, yeah, she had her diplomatic friends, but we were with her for most of the time. She would stick up for all of us, even though she was the smallest person in the room all the time." Another tear fell from her cheek. "But she never stopped protecting us. So, of course, now that she has an even bigger family, she's going to go overboard with making sure we're safe."
JJ spoke. "Do you think Lou would give up her life to save ours?"
"Yes," Caroline said, with no hesitation. "Absolutely she would."
Morgan stood up, "Then we have to put it into high gear. We don't know how much time we have."
Sharing a look with Dave, the two agents turned away from the rest of group, walking in the direction of Garcia's office.
"Shit," Caroline muttered. "I thought I was the only one that was gonna kick Lou's ass when we get her back."
"Get in line," JJ quipped in half-heartedly.
"Hey."
Linnie stopped her new friend. She saw the look on JJ's face, different from the few times she had seen the agent. Whenever Caroline saw Jennifer, her eyes were bright, full of interest and intrigue. But when she looked at JJ in this moment, there was some despair, a hint of feeling lost or unease… Linnie couldn't pinpoint it exactly, but she knew that JJ was feeling like there was no hope of getting Lou back.
"She's coming home," Caroline's tone was definite. "I know Lou would give up her own life, or kill Noah, or do something that is uncharacteristic for her normal behavior in the circumstance like this—"
"You make it sound like she will do these things."
"She would… if it came down to it."
JJ squinted, trying to decipher what she meant. "Where's the 'but'?"
The redhead shrugged her shoulders. "But it's not going to come down to that."
Jennifer scoffed, not believing her new friend. "And you can confirm that?"
Caroline crossed her arms. "You've known Lou for a while now, right? Five, six months?" She watched JJ nod. "And throughout the entire time that you've known her, you know that if you guys are making a plan, she'll make six back-up plans for the fourteen other plans she created in the middle of creating the original plan?"
It hit JJ then, realizing what Caroline meant.
"She'll make a list of different ways to capture Bennett, probably listing them alphabetically, the last ones with the higher probability of being executed successfully."
The redhead's eyes almost came out of her head. "Damn, you agents really are fast."
"So if she left, she wouldn't have left without making a plan to leave, which she would have left at the house…" JJ remembered what Spencer told her. "But Spence told me she cleaned her library."
The whites of Caroline's eyes shown. "I'm sorry. Did you use the word 'clean' and 'library' in the same sentence?"
"It was deliberate. She was hiding her information from Spencer."
"Shit, okay, so she's doing the complete opposite of what she usually does."
The opposite.
Opposite.
OH SHIT.
Standing up abruptly, the brain blast hit Caroline.
"When Lou regularly tries to hide things, she leaves no indication of anything, not to what she's feeling or what she's said or where she goes to hide and cry."
JJ wasn't following, "So…"
"So if Lou is doing the opposite of what she usually does…"
She let JJ catch up to her thought process (Caroline didn't have to wait that long).
"Then Lou did leave something behind to follow her."
"Lou always did like to leave a path straight to where she was."
"Yes!" Both women were excited about where they were headed. Linnie kept up the momentum.
"I know Lou is notorious for keeping me out of the loop, but this… She's never done anything like this. This isn't Lou, she wouldn't just poof in the middle of the night without warning or a note or something."
"There was a note," JJ said to her. Caroline turned to Jennifer in disbelief.
"A note? Was it a general note? Like 'hey, I'm gone, sorry'?"
"No. It was a letter to Spencer."
There was a pause from Caroline, and Jennifer knew that her friend was hesitant to ask the next question.
"Can I see it?"
"I don't know if Spence will be willing to let go of it."
"Here."
The two women turned around to find Spencer, who had quietly walked up to the two, holding out the folded piece of paper that was a lot more worn out that a not-even-a-three-day-old letter should have been. Linnie looked at Spencer, looked at the heartbroken man in front of her, and felt that she was going to pull out Bennett's teeth with her bare hands. What a despicable man like Noah Bennett to tear apart the two most precious snowflakes in the world. She was upset, so upset that her best friend was missing somewhere on the planet, upset that her best friend's boyfriend was barely holding it together, upset that her best friend's psychotic ex-boyfriend was still breathing… she was really upset
She didn't even touch the letter. She just pulled Spencer in a big bear hug.
"She's coming home," Caroline whispered to Spencer. "We'll make sure she does."
He just nodded, holding the letter out to her.
"I've read through it extensively. Nothing indicates a location, or a navigational point, or…" Spencer sighed, gathering his emotions. "I haven't been able to find anything."
Caroline smiled softly. "It's okay, Doc. I've decrypted a few Lou Letters in my lifetime." The sentence caused Linnie to recall a memory, one that didn't seem pleasant. Spencer, who usually wouldn't have picked up on the subtle expression, saw Caroline's face falter.
"What is it?"
She sighed, smoothing out the paper.
"I didn't think I'd have to see another one of these again."
It made Spencer's heart drop.
"She's done this before?'
"Dropped off the face of the Earth? Yup. Get's it from her dad. Lou just has the decency to leave a roadmap. Or… well, a yellow brick road, if I'm being appropriate."
"Caroline-"
"That being said," she said quickly. "I've always been able to find the first clue."
"And who found the second?" He asked.
"Usually… Lou's mom. But, we have you, Spencer. I'm sure you could find a lemon cake breadcrumb on the way to Oz."
Caroline, who found JJ coming to stand beside her, began scanning the note Lou had left. Focusing on the letter in her hands, Jennifer watched as Spencer observed how Caroline was whispering to herself, almost talking to Lou in hopes of finding her. The blonde could see how Spencer, who although seemed heartbroken and completely tilted, was determined to find her. JJ couldn't even determine if Spence was angry; he did seem upset, but not like Derek, who was almost boiling, and Caroline, who was literally seething in anger. If anything, it should have been Spencer who was entitled to be a little pissed.
But JJ realized quickly that Spencer didn't care what she did, he just wanted her home.
"WHAT?!"
Linnie's sharp shriek caused the two agents to flinch.
"You asked her to marry you?!"
"Caroline," JJ calmed her down, "In a bit."
"In a bit? My little baby Lou gone and get her self engaged and she left her fiancé alone and you wanted me to freak out in a bit?"
"Yes, please. We need you to focus."
Taking a breath, she nodded. "Right, right. Sorry."
JJ looked to Reid, realizing how disheartened he seemed to be. "Spence-"
"Not now, JJ. We need to focus."
Nodding, they waited for Caroline to finish.
"Shit," Caroline whispered. "This one may be…"
She didn't finish her sentence. JJ caught it.
"May be, what?"
The redhead sighed heavily. "This may be just a letter. The Doc's right. This isn't a normal Lou Letter, it's different from things she usually writes."
That caught Spencer's attention.
This was new information to him.
"Different? How?"
Linnie shrugged. "There are parts that are truly sincere. 'I need to finish this chapter in my life for good', 'I can't lose you to someone who has already taken so much from me'. 'This was the only way I knew to keep you safe'. All of these are Lou, through and through."
"But?"
"'I need to follow my head'. Like, what the hell is this shit?" Linnie looked at Spencer. "You know how big that damn skull is. She hates getting lost in her head, because she is all heart. Even with a gun cocked right at her, she would trust her heart over her head any day."
"Why?" JJ asked.
Linnie shrugged. "Apparently her head's a dark and scary place sometimes."
What Caroline had said triggered a thought through Spencer. Her brain was quite a large space, with a wide range of information being stored there. While Spencer had his own infinite space between his ears, Ellie's brain was quite a large estate. He tested the walls of her mind, saw how wide they could expand. It put Spencer in awe to see his Ellie show how vast her mind was to him. It made him happy that she shared her mental manor, knowing how much her mind haunted her.
Why am I remembering why it haunted her?
It hit Spencer then, realizing why Elena hated her mind, and why it was bothering him. Because it was not something that Ellie would say. She wouldn't put that in a goodbye letter. It sounded similar to a person who he knew all too well, for many years. Someone who was very well at covering their tracks, but not erasing their trail altogether.
"Emily."
Both ladies turned to the doctor, watching him work his brain like he had done so many times.
Why would Emily get Elena to say something that didn't belong to her? The only logical explanation was to intentionally set the sentence within the letter, to guide them to the correct direction. But for Elena to follow her head… while she did enjoy the multiple rooms she created in the confines of her mind, there were places in her brain that were locked away, trapping inside anything that Ellie didn't want to escape. It was odd for her to say she needed to follow her head, as she always relied on her gut feeling, or her heart, to make the right decisions.
Wait.
Spencer stood, pacing back and forth.
He could feel himself figuring it out.
Elena would have told Emily how her mind works.
Elena would have mentioned what she used to model her mind palace after.
If Emily knew where Elena's mother was, she would have come up with a way for the team to find the two of them, to leave behind some indication of where they would be.
Emily would have not told Elena this, on account that Elena's goal was to keep everyone from finding out where they were headed.
Emily wouldn't make the same mistake of running off again on her own, not with someone who carried the same danger level as Doyle.
Not without leaving a clue, or a trail, or a breadcrumb.
Which is why she must have asked Ellie to follow her head.
Because her head was like her home.
It represented the one place she could always go back to.
Or, was currently heading towards.
"The Manor," Spencer whispered.
Caroline and JJ looked at him. "What?"
"Caroline," Spencer asked, "Would Bennett choose Lou's family home to keep her mother captive?"
With furrowed eyebrows, Caroline thought about it for a moment. Her eyes flashed to Spencer's, the colour draining from her face.
"That son of a bitch."
"Garcia," JJ shouted, walking quickly to the lair.
"Oh my God, it makes sense. Douchebag McGee wouldn't be the piece of shit that he is if he didn't do something as despicable as keeping her mom captive in her childhood home. I met him a few times, but something like this… yeah it has his stench on him. I'm sure Lou went there."
"No," Spencer cut in. "Emily wouldn't let her. She'd take them to a neighbouring town."
"What?" Garcia rushed out, her usual colourful appearance was muted with her dark-blue plaid pyjamas pants and an old shirt from a local pizza place. That didn't stop her from being energetic. "Did you find her?"
"Maybe," Spencer said, a bit of glimmer in his eyes. "We need you to investigate any movements coming from Elena's childhood home."
Penny's eyebrows furrowed. "She calls it the Manor, yeah? I'll see if I can find it."
"Let me come," Caroline stood up. "I practically lived there for half of my life. I know it just a little less than Lou does."
"So pretty well?" Garcia asked, walking along with the fellow techie.
"You could say so."
Watching the two disappear back to Penelope's office, Spencer turned to find JJ still not in the best spirits.
"JJ—"
"The last time something like this happened, I was in control of it."
Wiping the tear that escaped, Jennifer continued. "We knew Emily was going to be safe, Hotch and I. We were in on the plan, and I didn't realize how it would feel like to be on the other side of something like this."
"It's different," Spencer said softly.
"No, it's not. It's a member of our team… our family who is risking their lives to save ours, and is willing to do everything they can to protect us. This is Emily all over again, and this time, I don't…"
She exhaled, her stuttered breath betraying her emotions.
"This time, I don't know what's going to happen, and I am terrified that it'll be worse. Doyle was terrible, but Bennett? Bennett is one of the biggest people we've ever tried taking down, and this time, it's not a spy going against Bennett. It's Lou."
"She got rid of him once," Spencer said, with more conviction now. "All by herself. She removed herself from his life once before, and that indicates to me that she is capable of completing the same task once again, but now she has help."
"Emily can only do so much."
"Not just Emily. When we find her, we'll be helping as well."
Spencer looked down to find Dexter brushing against his leg. The dog sat down by Spencer's feet, his ears in tune with every sound in the building, on high alert. It took him away for a moment, realizing that the dog was like its owner, in the sense that their first intention was to always protect.
"How are you holding up?" JJ asked.
"I'm not." Spencer slightly shrugged. "I'm just more determined to find her."
"All anger aside?"
He smiled softly. "I don't care. Right now, I just want her back, and I'm not letting anything stand in my way."
Garcia came rushing back, hollering at the top of her lungs. Caroline was right on her heels.
"Guys! Guys! I've got confirmation of Lou's whereabouts!"
Everyone, from Hotch coming out of his office, to Morgan and Rossi making their way down the hallway (at a rather fast pace), to JJ and Reid who were already waiting for Garcia, gathered around the technical analyst as she pulled up security footage.
"This is a CCTV recording from several days ago, eight hours after Lou's missing status."
The video showed a private jet on a tarmac, where there had been attendants on the runway, pulling luggage out of the plane. A figure appeared from the entrance of the plane, heading down the steps. Although it had been a few months since they've seen her, Emily's form was familiar to the team as she made it down the steps. Everyone ignored Spencer's gasp as the next person, who was easily figured out to be Elena Lucille, walk out of the plane, right behind Emily, and into a dark-coloured vehicle.
"From what I found," Garcia continued, watching the car drive off-camera, "the driver had dropped them off at a remote location in Wellingborough."
"Let's move," Hotch announced.
The team that was once desperate to find their newest family member had now turned determined, focused on finding their friend before it was too late.
Spencer, who was indeed determined and focused, had allowed himself to hold onto a little more hope.
Hope that he would finally get to say how he felt.
Maybe she'll get to hear me say it after all.
[ + ]
"Jesus, Lou. Nice hit."
The professor pulled her hand back from Emily's shoulder, realizing the contact was a bit harder than she anticipated. They had been working hard at hand to hand combat, and Lou, having the memory of her father's training in the back of her mind, she was excelling at stopping Emily's "attacks". It got to a point where Lou could see Emily was thrown off at how well the relatively short professor had such a wide range and accurate aim, stopping blows from heading her way. It was therapeutic for Lou, to turn her brain off and allow her body to work on instinct. It made her focus and allowed her to remove any worry (temporarily).
"Sorry. I didn't mean to hit you that hard."
"Don't apologize." The older one of the two comforted her younger friend. "Now that I know how hard you can hit without a weapon gives me some peace of mind."
Lou took a deep breath, elongating her shoulders. "I'm improving on hand-to-hand at least. Can't say much for my aim when it comes to using a gun."
"I hope you never have to use one."
The thought made Emily's stomach turn. Lou wasn't showing any sign of improvement on firearms. Yet, Lou was excelling fast at every other aspect, comforting Emily just slightly.
It was odd, because Lou was perfect at everything else.
Scaling the side of a wall? The former spy was downright baffled when she saw the 5'3 woman (Emily measured Lou, to the professor's dismay of claiming an extra inch should be there) climb up the side of a twenty-foot wall without any harness, and quite quickly. Disarming an individual with a weapon? Lou may have not been quick the first thirty-six times, but after the thirty seventh time, where the young and determined Elena Lucille managed to take the knife away from Emily's grasp without hesitation, she figured out how to repeat that same action, but only faster. And from how Emily still felt Lou's hit from before, the Interpol agent knew the woman in front of her was well aware of how to inflict the maximum amount of pain at the perfect angle. So, Prentiss knew that Lou could have found firearms to be easy.
But something was holding the professor back from gaining that skill.
"With Noah, I won't have to. He wants it personal, and he wants his hands on me." The pink in Lou's hair was barely there, the colour almost white. She hadn't kept up with colouring her hair, since all her focus was driven towards stopping Bennett. It was the first task on her list after stopping Noah: a new hair-do was in order. "He won't do anything that will stop me from getting close to him, in essence, bringing a gun is not in his choice."
"Lou," Emily said, watching the professor take off the protective tape on her hand. "I can't help but notice you seem a bit—"
"—focused?"
"I was going to say desensitized, but sure, we can use focused."
Lou took a second to breathe, letting some piece of her bubbly self shine through. "You know I can't change who I am, Emily. But I can't have any emotion deter us from getting my mother back safely."
"Any emotion?" Emily questioned. "So, this anger-fueled determination isn't classified as an emotion?"
"You know what I mean."
"No, actually, I had no idea what you meant by this mission to stop Bennett—"
"—The mission to save my mother actually—"
"The mission to save your mother and to ultimately stop Bennett didn't have such an intense meaning behind it, until you told me exactly what it meant to have Noah out of your life for good."
"Emily—"
"And considering the sheer damn luck you had the last time you took Noah out of your life, it makes me more on edge. You barely got out alive the last time."
The former agent snapped her fingers in sarcasm. "Wait, actually, if I'm being truly concise, you weren't alive when you got out the last time."
Lou huffed. She was somewhat regretting telling Emily about the night she got the scar on her face, as the agent was practically throwing it towards Lou when realizing it took Lou losing her consciousness (and almost her life) to end her connection with Bennett the first time.
"Your point?" The professor asked.
"I'm concerned you'll pull some crazy shit that will cost you a lot more than you expect when luck doesn't come your way. Don't let history repeat itself."
Lou looked hard at Emily, realizing the former spy had thought Lou was going on a suicide mission to put an end to Sir Bennett's prestigious reputation and status of life. While the young woman couldn't deny the thought of killing Noah hadn't entered her mind multiple times, she knew the most important thing was to get her mother out of Noah's reach. It didn't hurt that she wanted Noah to suffer just a little bit, considering he probably was making Lou's mother suffer more and more with each passing minute. Whatever she was feeling (which was a cross between pure agony, heartbreak, and desperation) had to be put on the back burner. There were more important things than Lou's emotions.
"That's why you're here. You're the super secret spy."
"Retired spy. And I'm here to stop you from getting killed?"
"No, to stop me from killing him."
"That's comforting."
"Emily," Lou levelled with her. "it's not a question of whether or not I'm capable of ending Noah's life, it's a matter of choosing whether or not he lives. If it were up to me, I'd want him alive, so he can watch me live a long and full life without him and his control. But he'll keep coming for my family, and if he puts me in a position where it's me or him, it's going to be him every time."
A chill ran down Emily's back from how clinical Lou was sounding. This was not the same professor she met at Rossi's Christmas party, with the wide, bright smile and warm, inviting eyes. The colourful ray of light was no way reflected by the woman that was standing in front of Emily. As concerning as that was, she couldn't help but understand why Lou was void of any positive emotion. She wanted her mom back and was willing to do anything to get the job done.
"That's why you picked me, huh?"
Lou stilled at Emily's words.
"Because you knew I would be the only one you could convince. Because I was in the same position. Because you're protecting the same family that I tried protecting."
The professor said nothing, betraying the fact that Prentiss was unquestionably right.
"But you can't do it the way I did," Emily said. "Even if you get out, if you convince Bennett that you're dead, it will take a piece of you that you will never get to fill."
"We're not." Lou picked up the plans with her hand, shaking the item. "We've gone over every detail, every aspect that could come up. We're being smart about this, are we not?"
It was Prentiss' turn to be stunned into silence. Lou had allowed Emily to create a large portion of the plan, on the premise of the plan having multiple layers of safety.
"Okay." She said, finally giving in.
Before Lou could respond, or before any of the women could notice, a large figure came onto the platform. The women were located in an old farmhouse, off the beaten path. For them to see another human enter their area cause a great deal of concern for the two. Only when they realized that the large figure happened to be Zion Tikvah caused them to relax (meaning Emily put her gun away, while Lou put down the two throwing knives—her new skill was quite amazing).
The tall and tanned man gave the two a bright smile.
"Hashem yishmor… You guys should calm down a bit."
Lou rolled her eyes, trying to do as Zion said. "Not with you startling us like that, we won't."
While he was smiling, the Mossad agent looked serious. Emily picked up on that quickly.
"How did Reid take the news?"
Emily mentioned him on purpose, Lou noticed.
The professor hated that morning, where she had to watch her heart between her lashes, faking sleep, as he left her room, taking her precious baby along with him. She hated having to hear his sweet voice talk about her stress baking as she grabbed her duffle bag, throwing it out the window to a waiting Emily. She hated the moment she swung her leg over the window sill, looking at the empty doorway, knowing that her wonderful Doctor, who thought he had the entire world in his hands, would have the one person he cherished ripped from him the second Lou put her foot on the tree branch and climbed all the way down.
"Not well," Zion had a hesitant tone. "He was lost in his own thoughts by the time I slipped out."
Zion's words caused an ache in Lou's chest. By what he said, Lou could only deduce her Doctor had gone quiet out of heartache.
Something she was all too familiar with.
"Any news?" Lou said, causing some form of distraction.
Zion nodded. "Not from Bennett. State-side."
Lou's face dropped.
She hadn't allowed herself to think of the other side of the world.
Not when her heart was still there.
"And?" Lou insisted.
He sighed, looking at his old friend.
"A private jet with seven passengers on its manifest just left Quantico within the hour. Their destination is heading directly to us."
She stopped breathing.
The team found her.
She wasn't completely taken off guard by that fact. She knew how good they were, how Morgan would have pulled every file in front of him with JJ at his shoulder, the two of them using their minds to narrow down Lou's motive, or how Penelope would be having finger cramps from all the typing she was doing (but Lou knew she wouldn't have stopped typing). Lou could picture Rossi and Hotch, calling every person they could think of to help them find their friend Lou.
But Spencer-
Lou saw from the corner of her eye that both Zion and Emily picked up on her flinching.
Spencer would have been the one who ultimately found her.
She knew it.
But how could they have figured out where she was headed? Lou scrubbed away her tracks, to the point where even Zion didn't know where she was until she reached out to him. The call to his cell was untraceable, and Emily hadn't gone off and made any secret phone calls. There was nothing that had occurred from the time they spent in England that caused Lou to be concerned about their location.
Lou thought about it for a moment, realizing that she was correct in believing there was nothing to be concerned about Emily's actions after they landed.
It was before the flight where Lou should have been more suspicious.
'Write something that connects you to home, or something that is following your home', Emily had offered when Lou was writing her letter. It was just after she cleaned her library. She could still feel Dexter's head on her knee, causing Lou's heart to twinge a bit.
'Why's that?' Lou had asked.
'You love The Wizard of Oz. That way Reid will know it's you writing the letter.'
'It's too obvious, Emily.'
'Then tell him you're following your head, instead of your heart. It's what you told me just now. Paraphrasing, of course.'
Lou thought it almost cute stating that she needed to follow her head. She told Emily her head was her home, but her heart was Spencer, and how she found a happy medium walking the yellow brick road between both. It was the only way Lou knew how to justify her actions to Emily.
She explained this to Emily, who was oddly quiet throughout the whole ordeal, not offering any more advice on the letter besides that one tidbit.
And considering Emily only offered this advice after letting the former agent know she mimicked her mind palace after the Manor, the same one Noah currently used to keep her mother captive.
To which Spencer, who was quite intelligent, would deduce that easily.
She scoffed, shaking her head.
The professor had to give the spy more credit.
She was really good at being a double agent.
"How much time do we have before they get here?" Lou asked, not acknowledging Emily's actions.
"Maybe seven hours? Eight if we're lucky."
Lou took a moment to breathe. She stopped whatever multiple tasks she was doing in her mind: reviewing the plan, going through the self-defence motions over in her head, wondering how quickly she could get medical attention to her mother, everyone who was on the plane right now (if the professor's math was right, Caroline was the seventh person on that plane) headed towards putting themselves in danger. Everything that had been piling up in her mind was quickly removed, calculating what time she had left.
"We need to get to Northhampton within the hour."
Zion nodded in agreement, but Emily was ready to put up a protest.
"You're not ready," the former agent said. "I need you at a comfortable level with firearms."
"Prentiss," Zion said. "The plan doesn't require any use of guns on Lou's end."
"I want her prepared, if it came down to it."
"Emily, we do not have the time." Lou was grabbing her jacket, throwing it on. She didn't know what angle Emily was playing, but she had to remain on target. "I can protect myself without the gun, and I've told you Noah doesn't use one when it comes to personal matters."
The agent was firm. "You can't aim a gun at centre mass—"
"—You've seen my aim—"
"—and fire the same gun without it missing its target." Emily continued. "Lou, you are good at… all this, and it's to the point where your skill level is a lot higher than I would have anticipated, but I can't just rely on you being able to throw knives, disarm security systems, or at least be able to do more than punch someone in the face."
"How about taking out someone's kneecaps?"
A voice shouted from below where the three were, indicating to Zion, Lou, and Emily, that they were no longer alone in the remote barn.
However, Lou knew that voice like the back of her hand.
It was a voice she would have never forgotten, even if she didn't have a photographic memory.
She felt herself relax in that moment, noticing how that voice carried the same tone, one that was reserved for days where Lou was picked on by the school bullies, or wasn't feeling like her bubbly self. It was appropriate that tone had been picked by that said voice, since Lou wasn't herself in that moment.
"No!" Lou whispered in disbelief, not believing her ears.
She didn't want him there.
But at the same time, she did.
The once pink-haired professor ran to the edge of the top level, looking over the railing to see the person who spoke. Her whole body relaxed, almost turning back into the ten-year-old Lou, learning how to defend herself when on the ground on that warm June day in the backyard with long, wild pigtails bouncing about.
"Lou-bear was always good at that."
Theodore Charles Joseph Richardson stood in the middle of the barn, staring up at his only daughter.
The tears formed in Lou's eyes before she could register them, flying down the ladder. Her feet barely hit the ground before she went running to her father. Her arms flung around him, not caring that he was angry with her, or he was probably coming to stop her, she was happy just knowing that Lou had at least one parent in her arms.
"I'm sorry," Lou whispered, still hugging her father tightly.
She felt her father's hand on the back of her head. "I never fully understood how your mother thought you were exactly like me."
Lou's feet hit the ground, causing her to realize that although her father was hitting well into his seniors, he was still quite strong. She looked up at her father, who tugged a piece of her hair away from her face.
"Now I realize what she saw." Charles whispered.
Lou bit her lip, concerned. "Because of how I can just disappear without a second thought?"
"Because you would do anything to protect the ones you love, even if it that meant it would hurt them in the process."
She couldn't help but throw her arms around Charles' waist, holding her father again. She didn't expect him to be here, with her. While she was terrified at the thought of her father being hurt, she knew he couldn't back down.
Not when the love of his life had been taken from him by force.
"Why did you come?" Lou asked him, still holding him tightly. "I could have gotten Mom back."
"It's not your job to save the world, Lou-bear."
"But Dad, I'm actually really good at it."
"Even so, if you're going to try, you're not going to do it alone. Not without me. Understood?"
Lou only nodded in response, taking a moment to count her blessings.
"We're going to bring her back, yeah?"
"Yeah, Dad. We're going to."
While the father and daughter were embracing down below, on the upper level of the barn, where the two secret agents had been keeping a warm and watchful eye toward the family reunion. Emily, who had been taken by surprise, considered the amount of time between Zion coming into the barn and Charles entering thereafter was too coincidental.
And considering how close the Mossad agent was to Lou's family, she made her deductions quite quickly.
"You know," she started, "Lou's father had shown up at an awfully convenient time."
Emily saw Zion's smirk from the corner of her eye.
"Lou's team figuring out where her location was had been sheer chance as well, no?"
The Interpol agent chose to say nothing, looking at her friend hugging her father. It was comforting to know Zion also had a plan up his sleeve in order to protect Lou. While she wanted to be happy, she knew that her worries had only increased, since her father was now another person she wasn't accounting for. If the youngest Richardson was determined to get her mother back and stop Noah's madness with a calculated, semi-dangerous plan, then Emily had absolutely no idea what the elder Richardson was going to do.
Lou Richardson was a wild card.
But Charles Richardson wasn't even in the same game.
Emily didn't know which route to take.
If she waited long enough for the team to come, Lou would have the help she needed. Yet, her mother might not live past the notification of the team landing in Northhampton, not with Bennett monitoring any and all tarmacs.
If they went in, without their team, without waiting, they may have their window to save Antoinette. But it would put Lou right in front of Noah.
Just like Bennett wanted.
And apparently, Lou wanted the same.
Emily couldn't shake the feeling that there was something big about to happen…
…And the only two people privy to that information was Sir Noah Alexander Bennett and Professor Elena Lucille Richardson.
But the only thing Emily knew for sure: one of them wasn't going to see the next day.
Next Time: "You look good, Lou."