Chapter Thirty-Five: Take Me Away

Bella's Point of View

As we drive to our destination, my hand is laced with Edward's. I watch my thumb as it rubs his knuckles while he drives, his eyes fixed on the winding road ahead of us. His left leg is bouncing uncontrollably, something I've noticed happens when he's frustrated or mad, and I know it's all because of Jesse.

His phone has been buzzing practically non-stop since we bolted out the back door of the school twenty minutes ago. I can't help but glance down at his phone in the console below the radio, seeing Jesse's face staring back up at me. He's texted him at least half a dozen times since we left. I see Edward glance down with each new text, and each time I see him I turn a deeper shade of red.

Dude wtf! Where did you go?

CALL ME! It was a JOKE!

Eddie seriously call me! Where the fuck did you go?

EDWARD! Can you plz call me? I don't know what you think I was going to do but I wasn't really going to hurt her!

HELLO!

A tremor runs through me when I think of Jesse's hands on my body, so I try my best not to think about it and instead focus on right here, right now, with Edward.

I won't dwell on the what ifs.

Like what if Edward hadn't shown up when he did?

"Can you put my phone in the glovebox before I toss it out the window?" Edward snaps suddenly.

"Relax, Edward," I whisper as I lift my head from his shoulder to look at him. I give his hand a reassuring squeeze and he glances at me before directing his eyes back to the road. I feel like I know Edward, and I can tell he's fuming mad.

"I'm sorry, but..." He pauses to take a deep breath and exhales it slowly. "I always manage to get you into trouble, one way or another," Edward says flatly. He lets go of my hand to run his fingers through his tousled hair, pulling at the ends.

I sigh as I reach forward and grab his hand with both of mine, pulling it back into its spot on my lap. "Don't be ridiculous. What happened back there... Edward, that could never have been your fault. Jesse is perfectly capable of making his own decisions."

Edward punches the steering wheel once with the hand he's driving with. He still can't look at me. "But it is my fault," Edward persists, shaking his head. "I should have known Jesse would target you one way or another, to try and scare you off. He's been...making comments about us ever since he saw us talking after exams. He said he's noticed I've been distracted. I just never thought he'd go that far."

"And he thought I was distracting you?" I ask curiously, and Edward nods his head. "It's still no excuse for how he acted. He did say something to me though, back there in the locker room..."

Edward glances in my direction, eyebrow cocked. "Oh yeah? What was that?"

"He said he didn't know what I was doing to you, but that it ends now... Do you really think he was trying to scare me away from you?"

He gulps, his Adam's apple rising and falling, and then nods his head. "You don't know Jesse like I do, Bella. He's fucked. His way of thinking is fucked. He cares about absolutely no one but himself. Where do you think I learned to act so cold-hearted?"

I can tell Edward's self-loathing again, not just by his words but by how he looks. The pain on his face is undeniable, and all I want is to be able to take it away.

"If I was just honest with myself, and honest with you and everyone else right from the beginning then none of this would have happened."

I exhale and slump back into my seat. "You have to stop blaming yourself for everything," I tell him. "Really, Edward. You have to stop. None of this is your fault, from the moment we conceived Grace until just now, with Jesse. This world, it's a messed up place that works in the most messed up ways. What matters is that you're here now."

"I'll be here as long as you'll allow me." He lets go of my hand to rest his own on my leg, squeezing just above my knee and then letting his hand linger there. I feel my lips curl into a smile as his fingers graze my bare skin. "I'm so sorry your night was ruined," he comments just as he puts the car in park in a gravel pit, right in front of a large metal fence.

I reach forward and press my palms to his cheeks, forcing him to turn and look at me, holding his gaze with my own. "My night was not ruined. I actually had a really great time with my friends... and I'm glad I get to spend part of the night with you. That dance back there… Edward it was perfect. Beyond anything I could have dreamed of."

Edward closes his eyes, and I use this as an opportunity to lean forward and place a kiss on his forehead. "I still can't believe you're here with me, Bella..." he whispers.

"I wouldn't want to be here with anyone else," I confirm. I glance around quickly - I have no idea where we are. "But...where exactly are we?" I finally ask with a small laugh.

This seems to lighten the mood a bit. Edward's clearly very excited to take me wherever it is he has in mind. We've driven to the very outskirts of Forks, right along the edge of town. I've never really been out this way - it's the opposite way of the main part of town, and I've never had any reason to explore these parts.

Edward grins as he takes his keys out of the ignition and slides them into his jacket pocket. "I used to come here a lot to think, especially when you were pregnant or if I was stressed about school or practise. I always find it so peaceful here. It's like my own little sanctuary."

I giggle. "Mr. Cullen, that still does not answer my question," I tease him with a jab to his shoulder.

Edward gives me a mischievous smile before getting out of the car and walking around to my side. He opens the door, extending his hand to help me up. "How good are you at hopping fences?" he asks once I'm out of the car and the door is shut behind us.

I look past him at the fence. It's got to be over six feet tall, so no way am I going to manage to get over that, especially since I'm still wearing my prom dress. I feel the panic lift in my throat when I think of trying to maneuver my way across without face planting to the ground.

"Edward, I-"

Edward chuckles, then reaches down to grab my hand. Instantly some of my fear is gone. "I'm just kidding. Follow me."

I let him lead me to the fence, where a sign with bright red letters reads "NO TRESPASSING. VIOLATORS WILL BE PROSECUTED". He drops my hand from his and begins to run his hand across the metal chains, shaking it every now and then until he finally finds the area where the chain-link is disconnected vertically. He pushes with his hands and right foot until there's a gap just big enough for a person to crawl through.

"After you," he insists as he holds the fence open.

I pull my black lace shawl around my body tighter, all of a sudden feeling very nervous.

"Come on, Bella. I promise it'll be worth it," Edward says smoothly. That's all it takes for me to duck under his arm and through the hole in the fence. Edward follows immediately after and then his hand intertwines with mine. I love being able to hold is hand now that we're together.

We walk for what seems like only a few minutes before we come to it. The Town of Forks water tower stands tall on the edge of a large, circular meadow. The light on top of the tower illuminates the yellow, purple and white flowers blooming below and the whole place looks like something out of a movie, even in the dark. The way the light dances on the flowers... Absolutely breathtaking.

In the distance I can hear the bubbling of a stream.

"You used to come here?" I ask somewhat incredulous as we stop at the edge of the meadow. Edward seems like the kind of person who would blow steam off by running a mile or shooting some basketballs, not by stargazing in a field of flowers. I guess I could check that off as something I've learned about Edward Cullen tonight.

"Beautiful, isn't it? You should see it during the daytime," Edward comments as he turns to face me. He puts his two hands on my waist, and for a second I think he's going to keep us at arms length until his fingers grip at the silk of my dress and bring me as close to him as physically possible. "Almost as beautiful as you."

I rest my head on his chest, taking in all the flowers and the way Edward smells. I close my eyes for a moment and inhale the scent of Edward's cologne mixed with the sweet smell of freshly bloomed flowers, trying to decide which smells better. Truthfully, they both smell equally intoxicating.

"Come on," Edward whispers excitedly. "I still haven't showed you the best view."

I give him a puzzled look and he just chuckles and then guides me to the base of the water tower. He holds onto the ladder with one hand.

"Will I go first? Or will you?"

"Okay, we said we had a lot to learn about each other. Here's something about me; I don't do heights." I lower my head in embarrassment and bite my lip out of nervous habit.

Edward doesn't seem phased by my comment. "You go first, and if you fall I'll make sure to catch you."

"You and I both know if I fall we're both doomed. You go first, because at least then if I fall you'll still have a fighting chance," I tease him with a giggle, gesturing to the ladder he's holding onto.

He smirks at me and then reaches up with his other hand to haul himself up off the ground, taking one step at a time. The ladder creaks every now and then, each time making me wince, but soon enough Edward is at the top, peering down at me while holding onto the railing for support.

"Come on! You're missing the view!"

Truthfully what I'm missing is being so close to him, so I kick off my shoes and begin to climb the ladder.

"There you go! You're almost there!"

Edward grabs onto my arm once I reach the top and helps me climb onto the tower. He puts his hands on my upper arms and turns me around to face the meadow, pulling me to his body and wrapping his arms around me.

He was right, the view is wonderful. I can only imagine what it must look like in the daylight if this is what it looks like in the dark.

"This is so beautiful ," I say breathlessly, peering down at the abundance of wildflowers in the meadow below. "I didn't even know this was here. How long have you known about it?"

"I found this place last year on the day you told me you were pregnant. I went for a walk after school to clear my head and I happened to stumble across that fence. Of course, me being me, I didn't pay much attention to the warning sign back there, but I haven't been caught yet. I fell in love with this place instantly and I found myself coming back often. I'd sit here and look at the flowers and think, mostly about what a royal fuck-up I am."

I turn to face him, reaching up to run my hand down his cheek. Again, I can see the regret and guilt in his eyes, and I just want it to all go away. Edward is seventeen years old, and he's come farther than some grown men I've known of. Sure we had a rough start, but what matters is that he sees the light at the end of this long, dark tunnel.

He runs the back of his fingers down my arms. "This can't be keeping you very warm," he comments, referring to my black lace shawl that's hugging around my shoulders. It's not overly cold outside, but the wind is definitely chilly. "Here, take this," Edward insists as he shrugs out of his suit jacket and drapes it over my shoulders.

He pushes the sleeves of his white button-down up to his elbows, and I bite my lip at the sight of his muscular forearms.

Edward let's go of me to sit against the dome of the tower, elbows resting on his open legs. He gestures to the the space between his legs for me to sit, so I sit with my back to his stomach as he wraps his arms around me and pulls me close to his warmth.

I rest my head back on his shoulder and turn to look at him. "This is wonderful," I comment with a content sigh. "Really, Edward, tonight was amazing. Thank you."

He smiles, reaching down to grab my chin with his thumb and forefinger, and then presses his lips to mine hungrily. I kiss back feverishly and with passion as I reach up to caress his cheek with my hand.

Being with Edward feels so good, so right. I never in a million years thought I'd ever feel this way about him, but like I said, the world works in the most messed up ways.

He presses his forehead to mine and whispers, "Thank you."

"For what?" I question.

"For absolutely everything," Edward answers as he leans back, still holding onto me for dear life. I feel like he might never let go, and the more I think about it, the more I realize I'd be perfectly okay with that. "For being the mom you are to our Gracie, for giving me the chance to show you who I really am... Not many people would forgive me so easily, Bella, but you did. You put aside all the bullshit I put you through because you knew Grace needed me almost as much as I needed her... and you."

"I guess I knew all along that there was someone worth fighting for under that tough exterior you'd put on, Mr. Cullen," I tell him, squeezing his knee.

"Thank you for bringing me back," Edward breathes into my ear as he tightens his grip around me, pulling me as close to him as physically possible.

I smile as I lean my head back onto his shoulder, closing my eyes and enjoying this serene moment with the father of my child. He rests his chin on my head, intertwining my hand in his and running his thumb across my knuckles.

It's silent for a few moments, the only noise that of the bubbling stream and birds chirping in the distance.

"There was a reason why I approached you last year at that party," Edward blurts suddenly, making me lift my head so I can look at his face with a puzzled expression. He reaches forward and tugs at his bangs before pushing them out of his eyes. "I know this is going to sound cheesy, but you were so different from everyone else at the party that night… or at our school. I noticed you right away, as soon as you walked in the front door with your friend, but I waited for the right time to approach you. And by 'right time', I mean when I had enough liquor in me to get the balls to actually talk to you."

I remember that night clearly, despite the alcohol I had consumed. I was sitting watching some guys arm wrestle when I felt Edward come up behind me.

"You've never seemed to have problems talking to girls before," I say, blurting the first thought that comes to my mind. "What made me so different?"

He shrugs. "Like I said, you were just different. A good different. You were smart, and mature, yet still funny and mysteriously exciting. Innocent," Edward says quietly, shaking his head sadly as he looks away. I reach up and grab his chin with my fingertips, turning his head and bringing his lips to mine so I could give him a kiss, letting him know that he could continue.

"Most of the girls at our school, Darcy especially, would practically fling themselves on me whenever they got the chance. Yeah, I flirted back most times, but that was as far as it ever went. I never wanted to do that stuff with those girls, ya know? But one night spent with you and I was ready to give it away. " I give him a nod, urging him to go on. "You weren't like them, and I noticed. You looked so sad and bored just sitting there… I could tell you were just at that party for your friend. I was… curious to get to know you."

He takes a big breath of air. "We slept together, and I felt horrible the next day. That innocence that I liked about you? Gone. I just took that part of you so selfishly, and I knew you felt horribly about it when I woke up and you weren't there. And then you told me I got you pregnant… I felt like I had ruined your life. I felt like the most selfish person on the planet. I felt like I didn't deserve to be with you be someone like you. The baby… they deserved better than me. I've told you before about my fucked up past..."

"So you pushed me away," I whisper. Truthfully, a part of me is shocked to hear what Edward is saying. I always thought Edward just picked me out of the crowd because he was drunk, no reason in particular, not because he actually wanted to get to know me.

He nods once, his bangs falling back down over his eyes. "I tried. I tried to push you away so you would forget about me and move on, give the baby the best life with someone better than me. You know, everything I've told you before that day on the trail by your house. Thank God I didn't succeed in scaring you away, because I'd be missing out," he says to me with a chuckle, instantly lightening the mood. "It didn't help that my new football friends were total jackasses on the regular though. I learned how to be a dick pretty damn quickly. I was so fucking stupid for letting them have influence on me like that."

This time I reach up and push his bangs back, trailing my hand back down his face to rest on his cheek. He takes his arm that's holding me and moves it inside his coat that I'm wearing, wrapping his hand around my waist with only the thing silk between our skin. I move so I'm on my knees in front of him, my arms snaked around his neck. I use my fingers to play with the hair at the nape of his neck.

"Bella, do you remember how much fun we had that night? How much laughing we did? We weren't worried about cliques or who we had to be come the school year in August, we were just two people enjoying each others company."

I smile at him, and giggle at the memories. That night, Edward and I had spent the later part of the night together, actually having a good time. The alcohol definitely let us let lose more than we normally would have.

"Just like we are right now," I say , ducking my head down to kiss him yet again. I feel him grab the material of my dress just above my butt into his fits, drawing me closer to his body with one swift movement.

"Just like we are right now," he confirms with a nod, his beautiful smile reaching all the way up to his eyes. "You're so beautiful. I've told you before, Bella, but I'll never lie to you again. This is me being honest. I needed to tell you this tonight because I wasn't exactly truthful before when we talked about the night Grace was conceived. I told you it was random, but it wasn't… I guess you're right, the world does work in the most messed up ways."

I throw my head back and let out a laugh, then kiss Edward with so much passion it feels like I might explode. He sits up straighter, leaning into the kiss as his hands explore my back. I have my hand draped around his neck, tugging at his hair as his right hand moves from my back to caress my cheek, pulling my face even closer to his. Edward tongue traces along my lower lip, begging for entrance, so I open my mouth and let my tongue dance with his.

Edward fingers push one arm of the jacket down. He moves his hand from my cheek down my face, down my neck, and along my collarbone while still kissing me, left hand on my lower back. He glides his fingers along my shoulder smoothly and when his fingertips reach my spaghetti strap, he pushes it down over my shoulder and kisses me from the top of shoulder where my strap once was to below my ear."So absolutely gorgeous, Bella. My Bella," he growls, and the feeling of his hot breath next to my ear sends shivers down my spine.

I blush when I hear a moan escape my lips, not really sure what's coming over me but loving how this feels.

I'm interrupted suddenly when Edward's phone buzzes. Edward groans in mock frustration, making me laugh as I lean back, breaking free from Edward and then reach into the pocket for the phone. What I pull out is not a phone, instead it's small, square object.

Edward's Point of View

Bella's face drops the moment she realizes that it's a condom she's holding in her hand, and I'm sure I look like a deer in headlights. I expect to see anger all over her beautiful features, but instead she looks... sad.

"Edward," Bella manages to squeak barely above a whisper, pulling herself away from me as she shakes her head. She looks defeated, and it tears my heart in two. "Edward, I -" She stammering over her words, clearly at a loss for what to say. She definitely wasn't expecting that. Fucking Jesse.

I reach forward and grab her hand, pulling her a little so she faces me and looks me in the eye. "Bella, no, it's not like that at all. Jesse gave them to me earlier, trying to be a smartass, and I shoved them in my pocket so no one would see them. I never intended to use them, with you or anyone else tonight. I swear."

Bella takes a long, shaky breath, and puts her hand over her heart as she breathes a sigh of relief. She reaches into the pocket and tosses me my phone, which I slide into my pants."You said you wouldn't lie to me, and I believe you," she says, taking the condom and sliding it back into the pocket. "But just so you know, I'm not ready for that yet… not now. I don't know when I will be."

"Of course not," I say to her as comfortingly as I possibly can. "Your do-over time has to be extra special." I'm very careful to make sure to say her do-over time, not our. I don't ever want her to feel pressured by me. I want this work. I want to do this fucking right.

"My what?" she asks, covering her mouth with her hand as she lets a giggle escape her lips.

"You know, you're first time do-over," I tell her with a shrug. "You're first time… our first time… I don't think that really counts."

"I think it does," she says, still laughing. "We got a baby out of it, for crying out loud!"

I reach forward, grab her chin, and run my fingers along her jawline. "The next time it happens for you will be special, Bella. Not drunk in some random bedroom at a party. You deserve nothing but the absolute best."

She looks at me and bites her lip, and it takes every in me to not grab her and press her back up against me. She looks so damn beautiful when she's nervous.

"Who texted you?" Bella asks. I can tell by the look on her face that she's wondering if it's Jesse again. I haven't bothered to read the texts he sent, because I was trying to enjoy my night with Bella and I know I'd probably flip out hearing what he has to say. Truthfully, I'm still contemplating telling Coach what I saw happen in the locker room. I don't care if it costs us the game if Jesse can't play. I don't care if he says he was joking or not, no one fucks with my Bella. Not anymore.

"Edward?" Bella says again, bringing me out of my daydream.

Oops, I had forgotten about that text. I take out my phone and glance at the screen, seeing a picture of my sister Alice staring up at me.

Can you come pick us up at Darcy's since you ditched and aren't drinking?

I send a quick reply, telling her I'd be there in twenty-five minutes, and then shake the phone before putting it back. "That was Alice; I need to go pick her up. I can drop you off on the way."

She smiles and nods her head, and then allows me to help her across the rail so she can climb down the ladder before me. Once safely on the ground, I pick up the shoes she had cast off earlier, grab her hand and walk back to my car with her.

AS YOU WISH

When I arrive to Bella's house, it's nearly two o'clock in the morning. All the lights in her house are off except for the one over the door, so I take that as a good sign that Grace is sleeping well for Renee. Bella had told me she was texting Renee during the dance, before her phone died, and she told her that Grace was feeling better since having a few doses of antibiotics, but she was still keeping an eye on his fever, which luckily hadn't spiked again. She said she hadn't been a problem.

A part of me wants to go inside with Bella so I can at least give Grace a kiss goodnight, but I'm afraid I'll wake her up. God do I ever miss her. But if I wake up Charlie… I don't even want to think about it. Fuck.

Bella leans over and kisses me, leaving the hairs on my neck standing on edge. " I guess I'll see you tomorrow at the football game," Bella says to me as she reaches forward to pick up her clutch and heels off the floorboards. "I know tomorrow's a big one, with that scout from Tennessee gonna be there. That offer he gave you was pretty amazing if you ask me."

"Yeah, it was good. I just want something that will work, ya know?"

Bella reaches across and grabs my hand, giving it a reassuring squeeze. "It will," she tells me confidently with a grin. "I just know it."

On the drive back over I had told Bella about Jason Jenks, and his visit a couple of days ago in Coaches office. I had also told her about his offer, including that for couples housing, although Bella and I had literally just started an official relationship. I didn't want to scare her away with talks of moving in together yet, even if it wouldn't be for another year or so. But I told her I'd be honest, and I intend to keep that promise. She had the reaction I thought she would - the wide-eyed doe look that she gets when taken aback, but she told me that at least now we know that's an option, if it should come to it. Talking about it with Bella helped to ease a bit of my anxiety around the topic.

I had also told her that my coach knows about Grace, and she was actually rather happy that he had a good reaction and was willing to be supportive.

"I should get going," Bella says, reaching over to undo her seatbelt. While she's doing that, I jump out of the car and rush around to her side to her open her door, lending her a hand to get out. "Such a gentleman," she giggles.

We go up her walkway hand in hand, and when we make it to the door she leans forward and kisses me once on the lips. I can't even help it - I wrap my arm around her waist and pull her flush with me, feeling the heat of her body radiating through the red material of her dress. I suck on her bottom lip and nibble it a little with my mouth, causing her to blush and giggle.

When we part, she finds my eyes. "Good luck tomorrow, Spartan," she says with a wink, and then opens the door and steps inside, giving me one more smile before shutting the door behind her.

A/N: Here is chapter thirty-five! I really hope you guys enjoyed this! The next chapter will be the football game. Please review!

Also, I'm starting the process of outlining a new story to write when this one is complete. I have a few ideas bobbing around in my head, but I think it's going to be a Bandward story, because they're one of my favorite kinds to read. I like the whole rockstar element. I just want your guys opinion! I usually write stories involving pregnancy because I find it easy to keep it interesting, but I'm just wondering if you guys want to see another pregnancy story, or if you'd like to see something different. Let me know in the reviews! If you want to know more about the idea I have, feel free to PM me.