A/N: Lots of writing going on these last few days, as I procrastinate discovering just how much stuff I've accumulated in my little apartment over the last three years. I really hate packing...which is good news for my story, because this is an excellent procrastination method.
I hope you enjoy this chapter - this will mark the first teeny tiny steps on Derek's path to redemption. At least, I hope that's where this path leads!
"Explain to me again why I'm watching McBastard operate during my lunch break?" Lexie asked as she slipped into a seat next to Izzie in the gallery.
"Because, you're an intern. Maybe you'll learn something," Cristina said. "Besides, Hahn's working in there too. We're watching her, not McBastard."
"I really think we should stop calling him that, guys," Izzie said. "It isn't very professional."
"Seriously? Barbie wants to have a conversation about professionalism?" Cristina asked. "Miss 'I fell in love with my patient' wants to talk professionalism?"
"Seriously? Seriously? Can we not have an argument that doesn't involve Denny? Seriously?" Izzie snapped.
"Guys, not now, please?" Lexie said, trying not to laugh at their interaction. "For one thing, I'm totally out of the loop on that situation. And for another, there are other people here. You might want to hold off on the catfight until you're somewhere a little more private."
"I don't mind," Kathleen piped up from the row in front of them. Turning to face them, she smiled. "Now, McBastard, would that be Dr. Shepherd?"
"Um, yeah, McBastard is Dr. Shepherd," Izzie said, slightly taken aback.
"Can I ask why you call him that?" Kathleen asked.
"You can ask, but we aren't talking," Cristina said, earning sharp looks from Izzie and Lexie. "What? We don't even know her!"
"She has a point," Lexie said, turning back to Kathleen. "Who are you?"
Kathleen laughed. "I'm Kathleen Myers. I'm just in town for a few days from New York."
"McBastard's sister," Cristina said, quickly connecting the pieces in her head.
"Um…yes," Kathleen said. "How did you know?"
"You obviously know him, you look like him, you're both from New York," Cristina said. "It doesn't take a rocket scientist to figure that one out."
"But she doesn't seem like another McBitch," Izzie protested.
"McBitch?" Kathleen asked, laughing at their names. "That wouldn't happen to be Nancy, would it?"
"I think that was her name," Izzie said. "No offense, since I guess she's your sister and all."
"None taken," Kathleen smiled. "Nancy can be a bit…well, harsh, sometimes. Especially when she's going through personal issues. I really think that visit was more for her sake than for Derek's, quite honestly."
"Well that's still no excuse," Izzie said. "Marching in here like she knows everything, trying to scare Meredith away. McBitch totally fit her."
"Do you give everyone a name like that?" Kathleen asked.
"Nah, not everyone. But we really do like nicknames, now that I think about it. Cristina started it with the whole McDreamy thing," Izzie said.
"Who's McDreamy?" Kathleen asked.
"McBastard," Lexie said. "We changed it after the whole nurse thing. I'm pretty sure McBastard was George's creation…but don't tell him I said that, he still pretends to hate the nicknames."
"Derek is McDreamy? Oh, my sisters are going to get a big kick out of this one," Kathleen laughed.
"McSteamy's still my favorite McName," Izzie said. "Very fitting. Mer did very well when she came up with one."
"Do I even want to ask?" Kathleen laughed.
"Sloan," Cristina said.
"Mark? Oh good Lord, this gets better and better," Kathleen giggled. "I'm so glad I came in here today. Although, now I think I know why Derek didn't want me to hang out around the hospital today. Good gossip is the one thing I miss about not working in a hospital."
"Are you a doctor?" Izzie asked.
"Psychiatrist," Kathleen replied.
"Oh good, maybe you can figure out why McBastard is such a jackass," Cristina said as she rolled her eyes.
"Don't worry, we're working on that," Kathleen said. "He really doesn't do it deliberately, he's just absolutely clueless sometimes. He's got no concept of how his actions are perceived."
"Right," Lexie said sarcastically. "So calling my sister a whore was just him being clueless?"
"What time is your flight, George?" Meredith asked as he and Callie prepared to leave.
"Not until three, but Addison says traffic to LAX is a bit of a nightmare from here," George said. "I wish we could stay longer, but hey, you'll be back in Seattle day after tomorrow, so we'll see you soon."
"Well, we'd better get going," Addison said, walking into Meredith's room. "You two ready?"
George and Callie nodded, and headed over to Meredith to say their goodbyes.
"You take care, Grey. I'll have everything ready for the surgery when you get back," Callie said, leaning over to give Meredith a somewhat awkward hug.
"Thanks, Callie. I really appreciate it," Meredith said, lowering her voice just a little. "For what it's worth, I think you and George are doing a good thing with this waiting and dating."
"Waiting and dating?" Callie said, laughing slightly at the rhyme. "I like it. And thank you, Meredith, for giving us that push."
"That's what I'm here for," Meredith smiled as Callie stepped back and let George and Meredith have a moment to say goodbye.
"Be good, George," Meredith said. "I think you might like this dating thing."
"I just might, Mer," George said happily. "You take care, and try not to get into any trouble until you get back to Seattle, okay?"
"But then I can get into all the trouble I want?" Meredith teased.
"Only if you let me and Callie help," George laughed.
Kathleen was waiting for Derek in the locker room when he walked in after his surgery. He groaned slightly, knowing something bad was coming by the way she way leaning against the wall, arms crossed over her chest, with her foot tapping out a testy rhythm.
"Did you catch the surgery, Kath?" Derek asked lightly.
"I did. I met some interesting people in the gallery, too. In fact, I met Lexie Grey," Kathleen said sharply, causing Derek to wince slightly. "And I need you to clear something up for me, Derek. You see, she told me a very interesting story about a guy who looks like my brother, and has the same name as my brother, but who I'm sure can't be my brother. Because my little brother, he would never call the woman he loves a whore. So tell me, Derek, tell me that I heard that story wrong."
After a moment of silence, watching Derek carefully studying the tiling on the floor, Kathleen snapped him out of his thoughts.
"Well? I'm waiting, because I'm sure there's a wonderful explanation for all of this," she said. She wasn't yelling; no, yelling, Derek could have handled. Kathleen's voice was steady, even and completely cold. It was her "beyond angry" tone, the tone she reserved only for the worst occasions, the one that sent chills down Derek's spine.
"Look, I'm not stupid, Kathleen," Derek began.
"Jury's still out on that one, at least as far as I'm concerned," Kathleen snapped.
"I just mean, I could hear the gossip. I knew what she was doing when I was with Rose…going out, getting drunk, taking home strange guys."
"As I recall, that's how she met you," Kathleen said. "It didn't seem to bother you then."
"I know, I know…I mean, she doesn't always handle things in the most intelligent way, I knew that. But Kathleen, you have no idea how much it killed me to see her doing that. And I was angry, beyond angry, that she was doing that to herself…that I had put her in a position where she would do that to herself."
"So were you angry with Meredith, or were you angry at yourself for pushing Meredith away?" Kathleen asked, raising an eyebrow at Derek's last statement. "Projecting your anger onto her was probably very easy to do. Very inappropriate, but very easy."
"Now you're just showing off, you and your fancy psychoanalysis mumbo-jumbo," Derek said, laughing half-heartedly.
"Well, someone in this partnership has to be smart, and from what I've seen, it sure as hell isn't you these days," Kathleen said.
"No argument. I'm a stupid, stupid man," Derek said sadly.
"Well, stupid man, at least now I know where you need to start," Kathleen said, a slight smirk playing on her lips.
"Start?" Derek asked.
"For your redemption," Kathleen replied. "I know where you need to start in order to redeem yourself in this hospital."
"Where?"
"You need to apologize to Lexie Grey."
"You've got to be kidding me!" Cristina exclaimed, looking at the list Dr. Bailey had in her hands later that afternoon. "How could Callie not pick me for Meredith's surgery?"
"Don't know, don't care," Dr. Bailey replied. "I'm just the messenger, and the message is, you aren't in."
"Who'd she pick?" Izzie asked eagerly, walking up to the nurses' station to see Cristina and Bailey examining the list Callie had faxed to the chief.
"Not you," Cristina snapped.
"Well, yeah, I figured that," Izzie laughed. "We're trying this whole being friendly thing, but I think it's a little soon for her to be okay with being stuck in the OR for hours with the woman who slept with her husband, right? I mean, talk about awkward. So did she pick you?"
"No! She picked Evil Spawn. Seriously, him?" Cristina ranted. "I'll bet Bambi put her up to this."
"Cristina, really…"
"Shut up, Barbie. I need to go find something to cut," Cristina snapped as she hurried off to the pit in search of a surgical case.
"Hey, suck ups!" Alex shouted, startling his interns as he walked up behind them that evening, carrying a large pile of papers.
"Dr. Karev!" his interns jumped up, quickly grabbing the charts that they clearly had not been updating. "We were just, um…"
"I don't want to hear it," Alex said, tossing the papers at Pierce. "Read up, Pierce, you're going to need it. You and O'Malley will be scrubbing in with me on the sub-patellar implant Monday morning."
"Are you serious?" Pierce asked. "Wow, Dr. Karev, that's great, thank you so much, I…"
"Save it, Pierce. I don't want to hear it," Alex said, turning to walk away. "Just don't screw up, Dr. Grey needs this leg."
"Dr. Grey? We're operating on Dr. Grey?" Pierce asked.
"Unless you can think of another patient who needs a sub-patellar, yeah, we're operating on Dr. Grey. Get used to it or get yourself another case," Alex said quickly heading back to the residents' locker room.
"So, are you taking me out again or should I call for room service?" Kathleen asked as she tossed her purse onto the hotel bed and took a seat at the table. Noting the tired way in which Derek was leaning against her wall, she smiled softly. "Sit down, I'll order dinner. Consider it my version of cooking for you."
Derek laughed as he took a seat and watched her search for the room service menu. "Mom would be so proud that all her cooking lessons went to such good use."
"Oh be quiet, you know if I had access to a kitchen, I'd cook for you. But there isn't one here, and don't you even try to convince me that that set-up you've got in the trailer is anywhere close to an actual kitchen. You'll just have to come to New York soon and get some real home cooking."
"I might just take you up on that," Derek smiled. "Can I get the home cooking minus the side of meddlesome sisters, though?"
"You ought to know better than that, baby brother. Sisters come standard with all home cooked meals. Take it or leave it," she laughed, pausing to pull her ringing cell phone from her bag. Looking at the caller ID, she smiled. "And speaking of sisters…"
"If it's Nancy, I'm not here," Derek groaned.
"Relax," Kathleen said, flipping open the phone and transferring the call to the speaker phone. "Hi Abby!"
"My husband is a complete jackass, Kathleen," Abby's voice came over the phone. Derek smiled at his baby sister's tone. Leave it to Abby to skip all the pleasantries and get straight to the point.
"Abigail Shepherd-Javenson, that is no way to talk about your husband," Kathleen scolded. "I hope your kids aren't in the room right now."
"Maureen is at your place with Shannon, and the other two are asleep, thank you very much," Abby said. "Now can we please get back to my husband the jerk?"
"What did poor little Matt do now?" Derek asked.
"Derek! Kathleen, do you have me on speaker?" Abby asked. "You really have to warn me about things like that! Are you alright, Derek? We're all worried about you, you know."
"I'm fine, Abby, really. But I think the point of this call was to talk about your husband, not me," Derek laughed.
"Right. Well, he's been working nonstop for over a year on this impulse regulator thing-a-ma-jig," Abby began.
"And I'm sure Matt appreciates your stellar grasp of the technical terminology," Kathleen teased.
"Oh please, you know I could remember if I wanted to. I did go to med school, same as all of you," Abby protested.
"Ah, but unlike you, we all graduated," Kathleen teased. As the youngest of the five Shepherd children, Abby had, as expected, followed in her siblings' footsteps and gone to medical school immediately after finishing college. Unlike her sisters and brother, however, Abby had never really taken to medicine, and when she'd become pregnant halfway through her second year, she had shocked her family by choosing to leave school and become a full-time mother. Although at the time they had all been convinced that she would eventually return, seven years and three children later it was clear to everyone that Abby hadn't regretted her decision for a single moment.
"Hey, I had a baby!" Abby laughed. "Forgive me for raising my children instead of saving the world. Besides, if I hadn't left school, who would watch your kids while you're out curing the crazies of New York?"
"She has a point, Kathleen," Derek said. "You might have actually had to pay for childcare instead of taking advantage of our sister's generosity."
"Hey, she offered! Besides, we all know Abby would shoot me if I ever tried to pay for childcare when she lives right next door," Kathleen protested. "Now, can we get back to the husband, please? What did Matt do?"
"Right, well Matt's been obsessed with this implant thing, and almost every time the surgery has been done, he's insisted on having it done here or flying to the patient so he can supervise. Now, they're going to do one in Seattle next week, and you know what he tells me? We're not going! He's going on about how he's going to supervise via satellite or something like that. A perfect excuse to come see you, Derek, and he turns it down!"
"Wait a minute…oh God, Meredith's surgery!" Derek exclaimed, making the connection in his head. "Matt's doing the satellite on that?"
"Is it at your hospital, Derek? All he told me was that it was in Seattle," Abby said. "Don't you think it would be better if we came out so Matt could do it himself?"
"Yeah, actually, I do, Abby," Derek said. "Maybe I should talk to Matt about it."
"Would you?" Abby asked, surprised that her brother so readily agreed to the idea. "I think this means you really do miss me, Derek."
"You just keep telling yourself that, Abby," Kathleen laughed. "I hate to break it to you, but this is all about a girl."
"A girl? Who? Not that slutty intern Nancy was talking about?" Abby asked.
"Don't call her that!" Derek practically yelled.
"Woah, there," Abby laughed, slightly shocked by Derek's reaction. "What does this girl have to do with Matt's consult?"
"She's the patient," Kathleen said. "And really, Abby, spread the word, he's head over heals for this girl, no matter what Nancy said. I haven't met her yet, but she sounds perfectly lovely. They've got some stuff to deal with right now, but Abby, I've never seen him like this. He's completely and totally in love. It's pretty cute, actually."
"Aw, is Derek in love?" Abby giggled. "This is so great! Well, now we really have to come out, because I have to meet the girl that stole my brother's heart. Oh, I think I hear Matt coming in, let me see if he'll talk to you, Derek."
After a brief pause, Derek and Kathleen heard muffled voices on the other end of the line, and then finally Matt picked up the phone.
"Derek, man, how are you?" Matt said. "It's been a long time; you sort of disappeared on us for a while there."
"I know, things have been crazy out here," Derek said. "So I hear you're consulting on our sub-patellar next week?"
"Yeah, Callie Torres asked me to walk her through it via satellite. I was a little surprised Webber agreed to the whole thing, but apparently Charlie Larkins is coming out from Chicago, so you'll have a good set of eyes in that OR. Not that there would have been anything wrong with you doing the neuro part, but Charlie does have the experience on this procedure."
"I think you should come out, Matt," Derek said. "I think…well, I have a bit of a personal connection to the patient. I'd really feel better if you were here in person."
"Derek, I'd love to help you out, really I would. But my schedule is packed this coming week, I can't just drop everything for a last minute consult. And to be honest, even if I could, I wouldn't. Torres' is a great surgeon, and the chance to fly solo on this procedure is going to be a big boost for her career. If she were to ask me to come, I might consider it, but I won't just fly in to go over her head and steal her surgery. Do you have any idea how disrespectful that would be?"
"It's just, the patient…Meredith…she deserves the best, Matt. And on this procedure, you're the best," Derek said.
"And I'll be watching every move Torres makes, Derek. Larkins will too, he's assisted me on five of these procedures, so he knows how it's done. Callie's going to do great, Derek, you just have to trust her. Obviously the patient does, since she asked for her specifically, and obviously Dr. Webber does as well."