*Disclaimer - Sadly, I own nothing of Twilight with the exception of merchandise, bought and paid for. I do, however, own my love for borrowing the characters and playing with them however I choose to. I thank Stephenie Meyer for creating the TwiWorld and for allowing us to have our fun with it. She owns Twilight, the insanity it created in my mind is my own.

Shug is my beta reader - thank you!

Whatever Works

Baring All

My forked stilled on its way to my mouth as Edward asked about my future. Now that he was going to be living here, did he no longer need me for Esme? Had I taught him too well? Had I been too bossy and he couldn't deal with me living there with him and his mother? "Was I leaving?"

"Once my mother's well, I mean. Have you given any thought to what you'll do when she's independent?"

I swallowed around the lump in my chest. "I… no… I haven't got any plans…"

A smile played on Edward's lips. "Does that mean you may be persuaded to stay with me? I'd have to find out what papers we'd need for you to live here without being employed by me and all of that, but is it something you would consider? I'll understand if you want to go back home, but honestly, being away from you for any length of time will be tough. I would be willing to go back and forth, though. I'm planning to rent out the LA house – I'd planned to sell, but the market sucks right now. But if you're going back to the States, I'll just keep it for us. Sue, Emily, and Jake are still in the guest house, so you wouldn't be completely alone there when I'm here with Evan. I don't feel comfortable bringing him into that yet, but maybe someday."

He continued on as I remained speechless. "My immediate plans are to get to know my son better, and to learn how to be his dad. I'd like to be able to take him for Maggie while she's finishing school. I don't think she trusts me enough for that yet, but it might happen. I'd love it if Evan could grow up knowing he had two families – his Mum and Abbi, and me and you."

"Edward…" I set my fork down, feeling ridiculous that it had been hanging mid-way to my mouth all throughout his speech. "It's really important that you and Evan develop a relationship. You don't have to feel like I have to be part of that – of course, I'd love to be! That little boy… well, you already know I'm a fan." I offered him a goofy grin. He was asking me to stay!

"Will you stay with us, Bella? I'll take care of you. You won't have to work – of course, if you want to, that's another story. We'll get whatever we need to make it happen. I just want you to stay." A small frown appeared on his forehead, and he pushed his chair back so that he could turn to face me. He took one of my hands in his, bringing it to his lips. "I know that I told you I'd be completely honest with you, but I haven't been. I haven't been honest with myself, either. I lied to you last night. I don't think I love you, Bella – I do. I've never been in love this way, so it's difficult to figure everything out. But I do know that I love my son. The thought of being away from Evan kills me – and it's the same with you. I can't stand to be apart from either of you. Please, Bella, stay with me."

Did he just say he loves me? "Edward –"

"I know, I know… this is completely out of the blue. I'm moving too fast, aren't I? This is why I was hesitant to tell you that I do, in fact, love you. I don't want to scare you away or put pressure on you in any way. I just feel like I'm starting over – doing things right for the first time in my life – and I really want you to be a part of that. From the beginning. I don't expect you to feel the same. You're still getting used to me, and my family and everything! I just want you to know how I feel. I'll be patient. And honest. And completely faithful – you never have to worry about that, even if we do live in different countries. If you decide to go home, I still want you to be my girlfriend. I'm freaking you out, aren't I?"

"A little," I nodded and laughed. He said it… he loves me… Why was I so terrified to admit I felt the same? It was as though saying it would swing the door wide open to me getting hurt. I had to be sure he truly meant it.

"What are you thinking?" he asked softly.

"Mostly that I want to make out a little." Jokes would work. And it wasn't entirely untrue.

"I can do that." Grinning, he pulled me onto his lap for a kiss. It turned into another, deeper kiss. "I'm more than willing to make out anytime you'd like," he said teasingly as I looped my arms around his neck.

"You really want me to stay?" I whispered.

"More than anything. That's why I wanted you to be involved in everything yesterday. Dealing with me is enough of a challenge – but Edward Masen brings a whole new pile of shit along with him. Can you handle that? I can't keep you hidden forever."

"Edward Masen isn't as bad as you've made him out to be, you know. I found him quite charming yesterday."

He smirked at me. "That's because you didn't really get Edward Masen. That was a hybrid, of sorts. I find it much easier to just be myself when you're with me. Normally, he's a jerk. Trust me. I'm fairly confident I can keep the jerk in me away from you, but I'm concerned about the madness that comes with that part of my life. What will you do when you read some bullshit headline about me? Or when your picture is on the newsstands and they're making statements about you. I don't know how I'll handle that."

I cupped his face and placed my forehead on his. "We handle it together. That's how."

"And Evan? Can you –"

"You know I love him! Of course I can deal with anything that involves Evan. We can learn how he likes to be taken care of together."

"I know I won't be able to keep him hidden forever either. I don't want him to ever feel like I'm ashamed to be his father. I just have to ride out the craziness for a while. Can you do that with me?"

"I'd do anything to keep him safe," I vowed.

"And my mother?" Edward donned an impish grin. "Shit, I come with a lot of baggage for such a young man."

"Lucky you're so sweet and sexy," I teased him with a laugh. "I love Esme, too." It didn't go unnoticed that I had just confessed to loving his son and his mother, yet I couldn't tell him I was in love with him. If he noticed, it didn't seem to bother him.

"Can we live with her though? I don't want to hide away upstairs with you, but my mother tends to involve herself –"

"I think she's learned her lesson, Edward. Many times, I heard straight from her mouth that she wouldn't get involved with something that was your business."

He quirked an eyebrow at me, amused. "And you believed her?" Laughter rumbled through him, and he buried his face against my shoulder. "Sweet Bella… I did warn you that she is a superb actress."

I had a feeling that despite his laughter, this was no joke. I loosened my hold on him, forcing him to look at me as I got off his lap. "What do you mean by that?"

Sighing, he threw his head back and closed his eyes. "I love that woman – I do. I just need you to be aware that she is a master of manipulation. I don't want you caught in the web."

"The web? You do think she knew about Evan all along, don't you?"

He issued a low whimper. "Suspicions are dangerous things," he said softly.

"Don't I know it," I retorted. "If you've forgotten, I frequently make poor judgement calls and act rashly based on my suspicions."

The corner of his mouth lifted ever so slightly. "I haven't forgotten. It's the strangest thing – I find it incredibly endearing and annoying at the same time. Why do you always target me?"

"You're the one who's been telling me for months how much of an asshole you are."

"You believe that?" he asked in a whisper. "Good."

"You're not –"

Edward stood abruptly, tipping the chair back with a clamor as he turned to me. There was intensity in his eyes that I hadn't seen from him before. "I promise you –" His words were hissed through clenched teeth and his voice quivered. "I will always respond to your suspicions. If you have any doubts, tell me. We'll talk. I'll tell you anything. I can't promise that I will never fuck up, but I will promise that I'll never leave anything unresolved with you. Promise me you'll always come clean with me."

His plea was heartbreakingly raw. "I will," I asserted. "I'm so sorry for all the times –"

My words were cut off with a light kiss, followed by a fierce embrace. I held onto him just as tightly in return. He would have my support, no matter what. I needed him to know that.

"I have to tell you something. I need you to know what happened. I need you to know that no matter how much I want to start a whole new life with you – just you, me, and Evan – I have another obligation that I have to see through."

Without taking my eyes off his, I reached down and righted the over-turned chair before grabbing onto his hand. "You said you missed the couch talks – let's go have one now."

I sat with my legs tucked under me, facing Edward. He slumped down, staring off into the room, clearly lost in his thoughts. When he began speaking, his voice was gravelly. "I confronted Mum with my suspicions before I left for London. It had played on my mind constantly since Alice first showed me evidence of my son. It was obvious that my mother knew of him. She had to. She had kept in touch with Siobhan – visited…" His voice trailed off. I gave his shoulder a squeeze of encouragement before massaging the back of his neck lightly.

"She was really upset with me for even going to London. When I'd missed his birthday, she had figured that was it – I wouldn't go. I figured she didn't want me going because I'd find out that she had already met my son, and all of that. The whole thing was a mess. My son was two years old already, and I had only known of his existence for a few months. My mother and my sister were at odds on how to deal with it, and suddenly they're arguing with each other across the country. All the while, I'm thinking this is my son – my life – and it was being handled like it was another one of my disasters that needed tidied.

"I'm ashamed to admit, but initially, that's what it was. I'd fucked up. There was a kid. I'd have to do something. It wasn't until we were arguing that day that I realized… I have a kid. He's a real person. And he's part of me. My mother's insistence that he didn't require my involvement in his life angered the hell out of me. All of the shit from our past suddenly resurfaced. I'd worked so hard to get over her lies about Tony Masen. And I'd really put a lot into making amends for treating her so badly over it. It seemed like it was all blown with that one argument. I've never been so angry. So hurt. She hadn't learned anything from the whole ordeal over my father. She was still lying. Still manipulating. Still hurting me – only now, it wasn't just me. My son was involved."

My fingers were stroking his neck through his speech, and I had wiped several tears from my own cheeks as I listened. I got the distinct impression he wasn't looking for a verbal response from me, but I did take the pause as an opportunity to place a soft kiss on his cheek. The tiniest of smiles appeared for me, and then it was gone.

"I said horrible things," he whispered. "Things I can never take back, no matter how hard I try. Dad got drawn into it…"

"Edward, it's not your fault," I insisted when I heard his voice cracking. I knew where he was going with this.

"It was though. If I had just kept my mouth shut – went off to London to meet Evan as I had every intention of doing anyway – and left all those things unsaid…" He twisted his head to glance at me with red-rimmed eyes. "They were only there at the time because of me. They were in LA for me. They were arguing because of me. Dad was distracted while he was driving… because of me. It kind of makes everything that Mum did to me seem petty and insignificant. Tony was, and is, an asshole. I am better off without him. I had the best father anyone could ask for. And Evan is, and always will be, my son. No one can take that from me. I have everything.

"And Mum… she now has nothing because of me. Her problems are real. What I did to her is real and significant and life altering. It's worse than her motherly manipulation of me. Even though I didn't know it would turn out so fucked up, I still went into every confrontation with the intent to hurt her. There is so much to make up for, I don't know if I can even accomplish that in this lifetime."

Tears flowed for him from my own eyes. I felt the pain that had been tormenting him. And I understood his need to escape from time to time. Suddenly, everything about how he behaved with Esme made sense – he was never at ease with her. He loved her fiercely, but his own sense of guilt along with the pain of being manipulated would never allow him to be completely at ease.

"It seems to me that each of you did some damage," I commented as I reached out for him. "She's not innocent either. Does she blame you? I've never gotten that feeling from her… I think she blames herself. Did she tell you otherwise?"

"We've never spoken of it." He issued a sad grin, reaching a hand up to wipe away my tears. "Please don't cry for me. I don't deserve your tears. My behavior has been repulsive – the way I can just shut my heart off and dismiss people from my life. Honestly, the fact that I've been able to do that frightens me sometimes. It was coming to that with my mother when we argued. I was so pissed off that I was ready to just walk away from her altogether. Things were very shaky with Alice because of Jasper. I realized at that point, I was only staying around for my dad. Because he never did anything to hurt me. He never judged me. He never did anything but love me and accept me and help me fix things.

"At that point I realized I could be either of my fathers' son… I could be an ass about it and tell my mother to get the fuck out of my life, or I could be Carlisle and accept what I couldn't change. I chose to move on and be the kind of father he was to me. I had to forgive my mother if I could be that kind of man for Evan. I don't ever want him to look at my actions – dismissing family members – and have him think I would ever do the same to him. Do you understand?"

I went up on my knees as I reached for him, hugging him tightly against me. "I do. I don't see how it was your fault, but I see why you forgave her for the things she did."

"I have to let it go," he muttered against my chest as he returned my embrace. "I have to forget what's done and be the kind of son she needs me to be. That's what I've tried to do since the accident, and it's fine when it's only involving me and her, but now there's you to consider. That's why I wanted you to know all of this shit… not to feel sorry for us but to explain why I'm sometimes not comfortable in my own skin, even at home. And why you need to be aware of her manipulations and not let her get away with it."

"I'm with you. I promise."

A genuine smile passed over his face, even though his eyes shimmered with sadness. "I warned her to not do that to you in any way, early on. We argued about it – that night you attempted to swallow half the pool – well, the morning after, anyway."

Pulling back, I cocked my eyebrows in interest.

He huffed and pursed his lips. "When Emily brought her home, Mum started in about me staying over –"

Wait… what? "You stayed over?"

"Of course I did! I was worried about you. I wasn't going to leave you alone! What if you needed help?"

I smiled at my newfound knowledge, flooded with a warm glow from within. That would explain why he had looked so rumpled and grumpy that morning. He had stayed for me…

"I had both of them on me – Mum, so certain that I would be suitably distracted by you and leave Maggie alone, and Emily, ready to rip me a new asshole if I had laid a finger on you. Brutal teamwork. And all I had done was sleep on the couch!"

"And made me tea," I reminded him with an adoring smile. "Thank you for staying."

His cheeks turned pink as he looked away. "She was right, of course. I was becoming suitably distracted. I went out of my way to prove her wrong, but it was pointless."

"The proposal to Maggie, you mean?"

He smirked. "I wasn't too heartbroken, honestly. It was more of a relief. At least I made the proper gesture… and I hadn't taken things too far with you if she had accepted. That would have killed me. I was actually a little worried that I was going through yet another rebellious phase when I first started flirting with you. I liked you. I cared about you, even then – I didn't want to mess with you since I couldn't commit to anything. By the time Alice arrived on the scene, and you supported me through that whole ordeal, I was too far gone. You had me. No matter what anyone thought of it, you had me, and I had more than Evan as a motivation to grow up."

"I kind of fell for you then, too," I admitted. "I felt like I was really seeing you in those rooms upstairs."

"You were. And you stayed anyway," he laughed. "I'm getting better at figuring out Mum's motives, but some of her tricks still catch me by surprise. Maggie didn't know that I was unaware of Lauren bringing Evan around before I told you about him. I mean, she knew Lauren was bringing him over, she just thought everything was good in that regard. That was my mother's doing, so you know. So she is still manipulating, despite her pleas otherwise. And the paralysis thing…"

"Well… yeah." I frowned, scratching my head. "That's messed up. Maybe it wasn't survivor's guilt at all – maybe that was another way to keep you in LA."

He shrugged. "It's possible. We had this conversation once before, do you recall?" he asked with a grin. "In my room?"

"I remember. I told you she stayed because she loves you."

"Sticking with that?"

I had to laugh. "I don't know anymore!"

"She does love me," he said softly. "But she has control issues that can't continue. I still haven't got a clear picture of the phony paralysis. It may be a combination – she stayed in LA because of me, but it also kept me there because of her… and I know she does have the survivor's guilt you spoke of. In my attempt to take responsibility for my own mistakes, I've assumed that same guilt for both of them. I feel like the only way to make amends is to just love her, forgive her, and take care of her – as I should have all along."

I had no words. He was right, and wrong. He did have to forgive if he wanted to have any sort of peace in his life – but in no way was he responsible for Carlisle's death and Esme's injuries. I could only hold him, and assure him that I would be there for him and, in turn, Evan and Esme as well.

A/N ~ Well, their time alone ended with a downer, but they've bared all. Edward has been dealing with a lot as best he could. Would you stick with this troubled family or run for your life? A long chapter is up next - family time! Thanks for reading! XX ~ SR