*THank-you for the reviews on the last chapter. THey were greatly appreciated. Thank-you all so much!*
A COUPLE WEEKS LATER:
"You know you don't have to do this if you don't want to," says Dean as we sit in the car outside of my mom's house in Phoenix, Arizona. My dad had tried so hard for me not to come to Phoenix to see her and Dean was actually siding with him. I told both of them it was something I needed to do to find some type of closure and I might even be able to start a relationship with my mom again. I want to know why she left us and never came back. I have to know. I spent too many years blaming myself. I need to know why she felt she had to leave her 11 year old and 3 year old daughter as well as her son that was only a few months old at the time.
"Dean," I say, "I didn't fly all the way from Cincinnati to not see her and not talk to her. I'm here and I am doing this. You can either come with me or you can leave but I'm doing this. I'm taking Talli with me to meet my mom."
He lets out a sigh as he takes my hand into his. He kisses it softly and looks at me with his blue eyes. "Do you want me to do this with you?"
"Yes because when you go to see your dad I plan to be there for you. I don't want to do this without you. You're a big part of my life and I see a future with you. I want you to be there when I do this."
"All right," he says with a smile. "If you want me to be with you while you do this I will do it with you. Just remember this wasn't your fault and if something happens that hurts you remember I'm here for you. I just don't want to see you get hurt."
"I've already been hurt by her the day she left and never came back. That hurt me more than anything."
"I know," he says, "but sometimes things can be said that are hurtful. Words hurt more than actions. I just don't want you to get hurt."
"I need closure, Dean. I may get hurt but at least I'll know why she left," I say.
"Okay," he says. "I love you."
"I love you too," I say before I kiss his lips softly before we get out of the car. I get Talli's carseat out of the backseat before Dean takes my hand as we walk up the stone pathway to the front door between picket white fences. "It looks like she did all right for herself," I say taking in the large stone house in front of us.
"I'd say so," says Dean as we reach the door. My hand shakes as I ring the doorbell. "Remember I'm here for you."
"I know," I say as we wait for someone to answer the door.
A few minutes later my mom opens the door and I'm staring at my twin. I never realized how much I look like my mom until this moment. I barely remembered what she looked like it's been so long I forgot her face. Her dark brown eyes as big as mine, her dark brown hair curly same as mine except hers falls to her shoulders and mine to my waist. Dean looks at her and then looks at me. "Can I help you?" she asks.
"Mommy," I say with tears in my eyes as Dean takes the carseat from me.
"Anastasia?" she asks.
"Yes, Mommy," I say with a smile but tears falling from my eyes.
"What are you doing here?" she asks.
"I wanted to talk to you. I wanted to see you," I say but she seems distant. She's not quite how I remembered her. She seems different.
"Anastasia, how did you find me?"
"I found you on the internet," I say. "Can we come in to talk?"
"I guess," she says but was hesitant to say so at first. She lets us in and shuts the door behind us maybe I did make a mistake coming to find her. She seems to not want me there. She didn't look happy to see me at all. "Please have a seat," she says as we walk into the living room. The house is just as beautiful inside as outside from what I saw. The wooden staircase spirals, there's a plant sitting in the foyer along with a table with a vase on it. We walk into a beautiful living room with floral couches and a leather chair. A large flat screen TV plastered to the wall. A fire place surrounded by bricks and above the mantle there is a family picture of my mom, another man that I assume is her husband and in her arms she is holding a baby girl that looks identical to me and another little girl about 4 years old that looks just like I did when I was that age. Dean and I take a seat on the couch as my mom takes a seat next to us after offering us something to drink I am too nervous to drink anything. I take a fussy Talli out of her carseat and hold her in my arms.
The tension is heavy in the air as my mom and I look at each other. I'm not sure she knows what to say and I don't know what to say. The room is filled with an awkward silence before she says, "I wish you wouldn't have found me."
"I wanted to see you," I say, "I miss you. Why did you leave when you did?"
"Anastasia, that's not important."
"It is important. You left me and I was 11 years old, you left Chastity and she was 3 years old and Roderick was just a baby. Why did you leave us?"
"It's complicated to explain," she says, "who is that?" she asks pointing to Talli.
"This is my daughter Natalia but we call her Talli."
"Daughter?" she asks. "How old are you?"
"I am 18," I say, "I had her in October."
"Wow," she says, "I can't believe you had a baby."
"Yeah," I say.
"And who is this?" she asks looking at Dean.
"This is my boyfriend, Dean," I say. "Dean this is my mom Lucia."
"Nice to meet you," says Dean as he puts his hand out for her to shake. She smiles and shakes his hand.
"Now can you please tell me why you chose to leave us?"
"Anastasia, you were always so smart," she says with tears in her eyes. "You were always full of questions I see that hasn't changed and you have grown up to be such a beautiful woman. I'm sad that I missed out on all of it."
"You wouldn't have if you didn't leave."
"I had to leave," she says. "I wasn't happy with your father. You know how aggressive he was. He pushed me into doing everything I didn't want to do. As a teenager in high school I thought I was in love with him. I thought he was the one. I thought we would have forever. When you were born I thought there was forever and we loved you so much. You were a surprise and we didn't know what to do about a baby but everything turned out all right. I wanted to go a different path in life. I wanted to live MY life but as a mother I never got to live that life. I never go to have the job I wanted and your dad had me working with him. It was not what I wanted. Then I became a stay at home mom. I didn't want that either. I wanted to achieve my dreams and reach my goals but your dad made sure I couldn't. He wanted me in the house with you and your sister then your brother while he was out working. I was okay with it at first but then I started noticing things. I didn't love him as much as I used to. I didn't love being a mom anymore. I didn't like my life. I was alone 90% of the time and I couldn't handle it. I had to get out. Your dad's late nights were a lot more than just work. He was having an affair with one of his secretaries. I found that out when I was doing laundry and found lipstick on his collar and found a pair of underwear that weren't mine. I confronted him about it and he told me he wasn't doing anything behind my back. He lied to me. That's when I knew it wasn't going to be forever. He didn't respect me, he never did. He never wanted me to be the person I wanted to be. He wanted me to be the person he thought I should be. I couldn't take it anymore. I hated my life. I wanted to start new. I wanted to get my freedom so I left. I didn't want to be a mom, I didn't want to be a wife. I wanted to be Lucia and I wanted to have my own life. I wasn't getting that with your dad and I didn't get is as a mother so I left."
"So you left just like that?" I ask with tears in my eyes. "You thought the best thing to do was not only leave your husband but your kids? Did you not love us?"
"You three were the best things in my life at the time but it was overwhelming. I was doing it alone, Anastasia. I couldn't do it anymore. Your dad was using me as his trophy wife. Have you ever read the Great Gatsby?"
"Yes, I may have read it once or twice," I say as Dean takes my hand into his. "What about it?"
"The part when Daisy says she wants her little girl to be a fool because being a fool is the best thing a woman can be in this world I felt like a fool because I am at home being mommy to my husband's three kids, on his side for business dinners and seminars then he's sleeping with his secretary behind my back. I didn't want to be a fool any more it wasn't fair to me."
"But it wasn't fair that you walked out on us," I say. "I don't care if you were tired of being a mom or if being a mom wasn't giving you the life you wanted you still had a responsibility. You still had three kids that loved you and cared about you that you devastated when you left to never come back. I waited for you to come back but you never did. That destroyed me. I look at my daughter every day and I can't imagine doing to her what you did to me. You just left like you didn't care about us or love us."
"Anastasia, that's not true. I did love you. I loved you all so much. You three were my entire life at the time. I didn't want to leave you there. Your dad told me not to come back. I came here to get settled in, I came here to get everything ready for you three to come live with me. Your dad knew I was coming back because I told him. I told him I was coming back for my kids. I never once said I was leaving you with him forever. He knew I was coming back and when I came back he told me to come back to Phoenix and never come back to Cincinnati. You know how ruthless and vindictive he can be. He had papers waiting for me to sign my rights away. He told me not to come back and threatened me. He said he could destroy me. I knew he could and he gave me $1 million to stay away. I took the money and signed my rights away and what he had on me was burned and forgotten about. He could have destroyed me and made my life hell. I couldn't have that so I did what he asked and took the money he paid for me to stay away. I should have taken you that day and never went back for you. I regret that. He told me I was dead to him and that you three were going to hate me for life for walking out on you. I didn't walk out on you. I had every intention to come back for you. It was your dad that wouldn't let me. I'm sorry, Anastasia. I didn't want to be a mom but at the same time you three were the most amazing things in my life and since I left I missed out on so much of your lives. I missed you become a mother yourself and you get your first boyfriend. I missed so much. I thought about you three every day."
"Obviously not enough," I say, "because a real mom would have fought harder for their kids but you didn't. You took the money and you ran. You're just as bad as he is."
"Anastasia, it's not like that you have no idea how evil your dad can be. I'm sorry."
"Sorry really isn't enough but it looks like you married again and had two kids forgetting about us and forgetting about your life in Cincinnati."
"I never once forgot about you," she says. "I think about you every day."
"You didn't even recognize me when you saw me."
"Because I wasn't expecting you. You think I don't think about you? You think I would just forget my kids? I know that you were a beautiful dancer. I know that you have won awards for spelling over the years and you won a writing contest. I know that you are destined to become a writer or a journalist. I know that you have won science fairs. I know all about you. I read about you too. I know everything you've done. I wish I could have been there but your dad wouldn't let me be there. I know that your sister is on her way to becoming a beautiful musician. I know everything I can find about you."
"Mom," I say with tears in my eyes. "Why didn't you come back even if he told you not to?"
"Because I couldn't he put a restraining order out against me and once I signed my rights away which I was forced to do through threats and blackmail you guys became his. I was just a whisper in the wind and soon to be forgotten about."
"I never forgot about you. Chastity never forgot about you," I say. "But you got married again and had more kids," I say, "how could you do that?"
"It just happened, Anastasia. I never planned to get married again but it happened. A couple years after I came here I met a guy at work that I fell in love with. We started out dating and then things happened. He asked me to marry him and he was everything I ever wanted in my life. He was sweet, he cared about my hopes and my dreams. He cared about me. He didn't use me but treated me like I was a person something your father never did. I am in love with him. He's not a bad guy," I say, "his name is Jon," she says. "He is a great man. And he loves me. We got married and a year later we had your little sister Arabella and then a couple years later we had your other little sister Valentina. I'm happy with him, Anastasia. I was never happy with your dad. I pretended to be happy but I wasn't. My biggest mistake was marrying him so young. When you're young you can think you're in love with someone but years later everything can change. You can say you want forever today but tomorrow forever could be a distant memory. Never marry young, Anastasia. If you truly love someone and they truly love you that love will last a lifetime and it will wait as many years as it takes for you to marry someone. Just because the first guy tells you that they love you doesn't mean it is the forever type of love. Just remember that. I see you with your little girl and I am hoping you're not planning on getting married until you're ready."
"Mom," I say, "I don't think you should give me advice on what I do with my life. You left us remember that. And for the record I don't plan to get married until I'm fully ready. I have so much I want to do before I settle down and get married. If Dean and I love each other like we know we do our love will still be there in 10 years from now. If there is one thing that I learned from you and dad it's not to rush into anything. I don't have to be married or engaged to know Dean is the one for me. His actions will prove it. And if it doesn't' work out that's okay but either way I'm not rushing down the aisle. I have a lot of things I want to get done first and Dean has his dreams too."
"Like I said," says my mom with a smile. "You were always a smart girl, Anastasia, that hasn't changed. You do your thing and you become who you want to be and Dean you do the same thing. I can tell by looking at you two that you have that forever type of love it will still be there in 10 years from now. Right now focus on school and focus on your little girl."
"So," I say, "where is your husband now?"
"Well, he has an office in California that he runs. He has a residence in California but he hardly lives there. He goes to California a couple days a week but most of the time he spends his time here with Valentina, Arabella and me. He's on his way back from California. He should be here soon."
"And where are Valentina and Arabella?" I ask.
"They are at daycare," she says, "I was getting ready to go pick them up."
"Oh," I say, "I'm sorry. I just wanted to see you."
"I know and I'm glad that you came to see me, Anastasia, I am really sorry for leaving you like I did."
"I know and I understand. I just wish you were around when I was pregnant. I needed you and I wish you could have seen Talli come into this world."
"I wish I could have been there too. So do you go to school or anything?"
"I do cyber school and I am in college classes. I graduate in June if everything goes well. I did apply to UCLA and NYU so we'll see what happens."
"That's awesome," she says, "I'm glad that even as a young mom you chose to stay in school."
"I wouldn't have had it any other way," says Dean with a smile. "Ana is too smart to just walk away. I want her to be everything she wants to be. I want her to be the writer she wants to be or be the journalist."
"Dean," says my mom, "you seem like a great guy."
"I'm trying," he says with a smile. "I care a lot about your daughter and I just want her to be happy. I gave up school but I have my GED and I work for Ana's dad right now. I'm trying to get into wrestling to become a wrestler."
"So you two really know what you want in life that's great," she says with a smile. "Can I hold the baby?"
"Of course," I say with a smile as I hand Talli to my mom.
"She's so beautiful," she says looking down at her before she kisses the top of her head. "How old is she?"
"She will be 4 months old next week," I say with a smile. "You know, Mom, I would really like to have a relationship with you and I would love to have you be a part of Talli's life."
"I would like that too," she says, "and I would like for you to meet Jon and meet your little sisters. I'm sure they would love to meet you. They look just like you."
"I noticed," I say with a smile as my mom enjoys holding Talli in her arms. "They're really pretty. I can't wait to meet them."
"How about you, Dean and Talli come over for dinner this evening? Then you can meet Jon and the girls. We can talk and start to fix our relationship."
"Sounds good," I say with a smile. "I really like that idea. I really want to fix our relationship. There's so much I want to tell you about and so much I want to know about you. And it's funny you mentioned the Great Gatsby to me because that's exactly how Dean and I got our start. We were paired together on a project with The Great Gatsby."
"That's interesting," says my mom as I hand Talli a toy to play with. "Because that's exactly how I met your father doing a project on The Great Gatsby."
"You hear that, Talli, when you're in high school and you get assigned to work with a boy on The Great Gatsby you might be meeting your future husband," I say with a smile as Dean wraps his arm around my shoulder and kisses the top of my head. "I love you," I say to him with a smile.
"I love you too," he says, "are you okay now?"
"Yeah," I say with a smile.
"And this beautiful strawberry blonde hair she has is beautiful," she says taking her hand over Talli's hair.
"That's what everyone says. I love her hair. I never thought I'd have a redheaded child but Dean's genes are stronger than mine."
"Jon has the same color hair as Talli, I was hoping that Bella or Val would have gotten red hair but my Italian genes were stronger than his but they are beautiful none the less just like this little princess right here," she says with a smile before she kisses the top of her head. "I look forward to being in this little cutie's life."
"I'm glad you're excited to be in her life," I say with a smile. "She needs a grandma she doesn't have one."
"She has one with me," she says with a smile.
My mom and I spend a little more time talking and she gets a little more time with Talli before Dean and I get ready to leave to go back to the hotel so that we can lay her down for a nap and then get ready to have dinner with my mom later tonight. I'm happy that I did come to see her and glad that she wants to have a relationship with us. I never thought my dad could be so harsh as to keep a mother away from her children but it is my dad and he is capable of anything it makes me wonder if his being nice to Dean is just an act or if he is genuine. "We'll see you later," I say with a smile as we stand at the door with my mom.
"See you later, I can't wait for you to meet the girls," she says with a smile. "Dinner is at 6."
"Okay," I say, "we'll be here."
"I look forward to it," she says as she gives me a hug as I hug her back. She gives Talli a kiss before she gives Dean a hug.
I open the door and just as I open the door I see my mom's husband standing in front of me. His blue eyes bright and his strawberry hair slicked back. He smiles at me and I smile back at him but I know that smile. I see it every day. "You're home, Jon," says my mom with a smile.
"I know I'm home early," he says and Dean's grip on my hand grows tighter, so tight I'm sure he cuts off some circulation. I look at him and he has a look on his face I have never seen before. Jon greets my mom with a kiss before he directs his attention to us. "And who do we have here?"
"This is my daughter Ana," she says proudly, "and the baby is her daughter Talli and the handsome boy is her boyfriend, Dean," she says.
"It's nice to meet you," he says with a smile.
"Nice to meet you too," I say with a smile.
"Dad?" asks Dean sending shock through me. Jon's mouth drops open at the word Dad and my mom looks confused. I look back at Dean and his face is red. He lets go of my hand and before I can stop him his fist connects with Jon's mouth as I duck under his swing.
"DEAN!" I say as Jon holds onto his mouth and my mom looks at Dean with a horrified expression.
"That's for leaving me when I was three years old and leaving my mom," says Dean with so much rage in his voice I never knew existed in him.
*A/N: What did you think of Ana's meeting with her mom? Were you shocked that Rod paid to keep her away and threatened her to stay away? How do you feel about her mom remarrying and having other kids? What do you think of Ana wanting to have a relationship with her mom? Do you think it will work out? Do you think her mom was right to give her advice about marriage? What did you think of Dean running into his father? How do you feel about Ana's mom and Dean's dad being married to each other? How do you think this is going to turn out? Please review and thank-you for reading.