Ch 37

Sookie loved to bake pies. Her Gran had taught her as a little girl. She remembered hours spent in the kitchen together, pouring over recipes and making up their own. She would come up with crazy filling combinations and her Gran would laugh and laugh. Those were some of her fondest childhood memories.

She hoped to make some of those memories with her own children … but they were taken before she could. She shook her head, lifting her bangs from her eyes and attempting to shake away her dark thoughts. She had Tristan now and the twins still came by to visit with her or crash for the night. Of course, her older boys only enjoyed eating the finished product and showed little interest in the baking.

That was okay. Tristan adored it. His favorite part was creating designs in the crust. He was actually quite artistic.

Payton was still gone. She had promised to stay in contact but there hadn't been anything in over two years. Sookie worried but Moira reassured her that there was nothing to worry over. Payton was probably busy keeping the kingdom together. She had an important job to do, Moira would remind her. She didn't have time for social visits.

It still broke Sookie's heart.

"Mama?" Tristan's voice broke through her thoughts, his small hands holding up the pie for inspection.

She smiled at him. "A true work of art, Tristan." she told him lovingly. His latest pie crust creation was an outdoor scene- a nest of birds surrounded by twigs of berries.

"They're blue birds, Mama … since its blueberry and cream cheese pie." he told her proudly.

"Its perfect sweetie."

Sookie carefully placed the pie in the oven and set the timer. They both set about cleaning the kitchen.

"Watch what I can do, Mama!" Tristan exclaimed excitedly, his hands suddenly surrounded by swirling colors of blue and green. Slowly the mixing bowl and spoon levitated off the table and sailed through the air towards the sink.

Sookie' jaw dropped in amazement. "That's amazing, Tristan." she stuttered, her eyes wide as she watched her son gently lower the dishes into the soapy water.

"I bet you can do it too, Mama. Want me to teach you?"

Sookie smiled. "Your sister, Payton, was teaching me some fae powers before she had to leave."

The smile left her face as her mind wandered back to her missing daughter. Tristan walked over and gently took her hand in his own.

"We'll see her soon, Mama, don't cry."

Sookie wiped her face, surprised to feel tears on her cheeks and nodded.

"Of course we will, sweetie. Why don't you show me that gift again?" she tried, giving her little boy a watery smile.

He smiled in return and put his hands out in front of him. "First, put your hands out in front of you and focus on the ..."

"I think that's enough for today." said a stern voice from behind them. Sookie jumped and Tristan turned around with a frown.

"Moira … we're baking." he replied in an annoyed tone.

Moira took a step back but then shook her head. "This isn't the time for such … lessons, Tristan. Its time to study the books."

Tristan sighed and turned back to his mother, giving her a quick hug and walking out of the kitchen.

Moira then turned to Sookie with a scowl on her face. "You would do well to remember your place, Sookie Stackhouse."

Sookie narrowed her eyes, far to used to Moira's superior attitude to let her get under her skin again. "You would do well to remember I am his mother." she spit back.

Moira's lips set in a tight line, but she nodded and left the room after Tristan.

"Bitch." Sookie mumbled under her breath and set about washing the dishes.

The days stretched on and Sookie continued to worry for her daughter.

Why was there no communication from her? Why was Moira even more hostile than normal to her when she brought Payton up? Why did it feel like everyone was once again keeping her in the dark?

She and Sam continued to grow close. He helped around the house after work, ate dinner with Sookie and the boys (Moira generally prefering to eat alone in her room), then watching movies or talking late into the night.

For all that she liked Sam and felt closer to him, something still held her back from going further.

She also knew he was getting impatient with her and frustrated with her hesitancy.

Like tonight, as he creeped across the couch and put an arm around her shoulders, nuzzling her hair with his nose.

"Sam."

"What?"

"Please stop."

"Stop?" he asked teasingly, now gently nipping on the back of her neck. "Are you sure you want me to stop? We have the house to ourselves and you know that doesn't happen very often."

Sookie huffed and scooted down the couch out of reach. "Yes, I want you to stop. You know I can't do this."

Sam jumped to his feet, throwing his hands in the air. "You keep saying that. I still don't understand it. You love me … I love you. We have this home, our children, we enjoy each other's company … what else do you want from me, Sookie?"

Sookie's hands covered her face and she sighed. "I know … but I just can't … I don't know why but something feels just … wrong. I can't explain it."

Sam jumped up from the couch, his hands tugging roughly at his hair. "You can't or you won't? Sookie … I gotta tell you … I don't know how much longer I can handle this hot and cold from you."

Sookie looked up at Sam and bit back the defensive remarks fighting to get out. He had every right to feel angry. She took a deep breath and tried again.

"I'm sorry. I know this is hard … its hard for me too. I don't understand my feelings half the time. I will be working in the yard and then suddenly become furious for no reason, showering and then suddenly overcome with sadness, sleeping and suddenly overcome with hunger and …" she stopped with a blush. "I don't know why I keep feeling these odd feelings. They don't even feel like they're coming from me … its so strange."

Sam stared at her intently. "You think its someone else … someone controlling your emotions?"

Sookie shook her head. "I don't know … that seems … paranoid, doesn't it? But I don't know what else it could be …"

Sam literally growled. "Moira."

Sookie rolled her eyes. "Sam, just because she's a bitch does not mean she's the one doing this."

Sam put his hand on her shoulder and gave her a gentle squeeze. "I don't trust her. We will figure this out. We will, Cher."

Sookie nodded her head and leaned into his comforting touch. She didn't know what it all meant but it felt good to have someone believe her and try to help.

a/n: Its been forever since I've updated this story, so I have a treat for ya'll! Double helpings! Leave a review and then go on to chapter 38. Tasty!