Don't Ever Look Back!
Spencer had finally finished emptying his stomach content in the ceramic bowl at three in the morning. Emily was fast asleep in their bed, while he washed out the awful taste from his mouth. Afterwards, he flushed whatever was in the toilet and walked out of the washroom, saw the time and knew that he could take one of his pills right now, even though it was useless. But they did help with the pain somehow. After taking his med, he crawled back into bed, and then felt Emily turning onto her other side and cuddling him. Emily then shivered and then she opened her eyes.
"You're freezing cold Spencer" she told him in a sleepy tone.
"I walked out for a minute or two. Needed some fresh air" he lied, but she was too tired to even noticed his change in tone and body language.
"Oh okay..." she then snuggled closer to him, "I'll warm you up baby" she said in a playful yet still sleepy tone and she was then fast asleep once more.
He sighed in relief before letting his fatigue take over and was now fast asleep.
When he opened his eyes again, he felt a huge shiver go through his body, before he started a coughing fit. After stopping he saw some blood, but only a very small amount of it in the palm of his hand. This wasn't good. It had been over a month, almost two, since the doctor told him that he had less than 1/3 of a year let to live and he still hadn't told Emily.
But he did tell someone about his shorten life span and that person was Derek Morgan. He had taken it really hard. He gave him a lecture about lying behind his family's back and other things, but in the end he promised to keep his mouth shut. Right now he knew that the house was empty. He looked over at the clock on his night stand and saw that it was 11:34 am. He then got out, took a bath, because he started to notice that he was having difficulty standing for a long period of time now.
After getting dressed, he slowly made his way down the stairs and into the living room, where he just lay on the couch and fell right back to sleep.
CM~CM~CM~CM~CM~
At 2:30 PM the phone was ringing throughout the house, causing him to wake up and went to see who was calling him. It was Emily's number so he answered it.
"Hello" he said, sounding tired and sick.
"Hey you okay?" she asked him over the phone.
"Yeah, yeah. I was sleeping when you called me, that's all baby"
"Listen we got pulled out of town with a case, so Garcia and JJ volunteered to keep an eye on the kids okay?"
"Alright, thank you Em"
"I love you"
"I love you too Emily. I'll talk to you later?"
"I'll call when we get some resting time okay"
"Alright, talk to you then and be careful"
"I will" he then hung up and went to the kitchen, got himself a cool glass of water and a protein shake, since he couldn't keep solid food down. He slowly drank the shake while he watched TV. What he wasn't expecting was another phone call, but this one was from Derek so he answered it.
"Morgan what is it?" he asked.
"You okay kid?"
"Of course; I'm dying and i've never felt more alive"
"Calm down, you don't have to be like that man. How are you feeling?"
"Weak... weaker than yesterday"
"Kid, you're going to have to tell her"
"I will when she gets back home. But you're going to have to tell Garcia and JJ to keep the kids over an extra night okay?"
"Alright, I'll talk to them without rousing any suspicion"
"Just tell them that Em and I want some alone time"
"Fine by me, listen I got to go. But i'll let you know when we leave and land okay?"
"Alright. Talk to you later Morgan" he then hung up and went back on the couch, where he feel asleep once again.
CM~CM~CM~CM~CM~
The case lasted longer than they thought, but Emily was glad that it as over and now she was focused on getting home to her husband and children. As the Jet landed, Prentiss was the first one off and was called out by Hotch telling her that she needed to at least do half of the reports, so that at least she could come into work a little later. Well that sounded good to Emily but Morgan stepped in and requested to head on home. Rossi seconded it and Hotch just gave in.
"Fine. But that means everyone in by seven" he said sternly as he walked off to his vehicle, as did everyone else.
"Hey Morgan!" Prentiss called out.
"Yeah?"
"Why the sudden change?"
"...What?" he pretended, but Emily saw through him.
"You would love to come in later instead of the same time"
"...Fine. Garcia and JJ have the kids for the rest of the night" he said before getting in his car and then drove off.
CM~CM~CM~CM~CM~
As Emily got into her home, she saw a dim light coming from the living room / dining room and slowly made her way over, only to see a fast asleep Spencer Reid. She would have smiled if she hadn't noticed how pale he looked. She went to feel his forehead, but jumped back when she felt how icy his skin was. This wasn't normal.
"Spencer" she called out. Spencer slowly opened his eyes and saw his wife looking at him in a very concerning way.
"Hey Emily" he said before getting a coughing fit, using the inside of his elbow, instead of his hands. After it was over, Emily saw the light colour of crimson red on his lower lip.
"Spencer... what's going on... I mean I have an idea... but..." she sat down and waited for him to say something. Anything that told her that it was just her imagination.
"Emily... I'm sorry"
"No..."
"I'm so sorry" he told her again.
"How long..."
"How long what?"
"Don't you dare play that game with me!" she snapped, tears pouring down her cheek, "How long did you know?"
"..."
"You lied... why?"
"I didn't want to... but when I told you that it had stopped growing... the expression on your face. I saw the weight lifting off your shoulder and the relief showing... I've been trying to find a way tot ell you ever since, but I could never find the strength to tell you"
"How long did the doctor give you?"
"1/3 of a year..."
"Four months... and you told me that you were fine, almost two months ago... Why... After all this time"
"Emily..."
"Don't you Emily me, Spencer Reid!" she snapped at him again, "I have every right to be angry at you. Pissed even!"
"You're right"
"You had no right to lie and pretend everything was alright when you weren't!"
"I know"
"Stop agreeing with me, I'm arguing and yelling at you!" this caused him to laugh, "You think it's funny?"
"I'm sorry, but yes it is" he said in a soft/rough voice.
"It's..." Emily sat back on the couch and let the tears out, before he knew it he saw her body shook from her sobs, "It's not how things were suppose to work out!"
"Things don't always work out the way we want, Emily. I just hate that this is one of these situations. I'm sorry for lying but I needed to spend time with you and everyone else without the whole "No this is going to kill him, get the wheelchair" or "You need all the rest you can get and save up your energy"... I know everyone by heart, Emily, and believe me they'd treat me like a baby. You don't but I didn't want you to worry every time I needed to sit and rest, you thought about the time we had left" he explained to her.
"You deserve to sleep on the couch for lying to everyone, especially your wife"
"I know"
"But I won't"
"Because you love me"
"No, because you've been sleeping on that thing all day" she told him, causing both of them to laugh.
"I am sorry I lied to you..."
"I know" she answered him, while holding onto his hand. They spent the entire night on the couch, holding one another.