Isn't summer the best? I love the sun and the warmth and the tan and drinks and ice cream! Anyway, deviating slightly from the openers I normally write! Thanks as always to Jo, Emmy, Hollie, Aileen and LittleBit100. Sorry for making you wait! Enjoy!
Callum stared at Jess dumbfounded. "Sorry, I'm sure I just heard you ask me to be your baby daddy?"
"Indeed I did." Jess said with a nervous laugh.
"Does that mean that you're...that we're...?" Callum couldn't quite bring himself to finish that sentence.
"If you're asking if we're having a baby, then yes, we are." Jess said happily, her throat closing up as tears fell. Callum just sat and stared at her, not saying anything. Her smile faltered and she cupped his cheek with her hand, "Callum? Say something."
Callum seemed to snap to, his eyes focusing on hers, "Why're you crying?"
"Because I'm happy. Are you happy?" she asked him tentatively. She watched as he slowly got to his feet and walked away, stopping in front of the wardrobe, his back towards her. "I mean...I thought you would be happy, and you know, I've only just found out but wanted to be sure before I said anything...but if you're not happy, please, just say." Callum slowly turned round so he was facing her. His face was blank. Jess didn't know what to make of his reaction. He walked back towards her, standing right in front of her. He held his hands out, and she placed her hands in his. He pulled her to her feet, suddenly wrapping his arms round her waist and spinning her round the room.
"We're having a baby!" he shouted, laughter filling the room.
"You're ok with it?" Jess asked worriedly as he put her on her feet. Callum stood beside her, placing a hand over her flat stomach.
"Are you kidding me? I'm going to be a dad. Right now, in here, you're carrying my baby. What's not ok with that?" Callum said, almost in awe. "You know how earlier I said that there was nothing more you could say which would make me love you more?" Jess nodded, a smile forming on her lips, "Well you just did." Callum slowly got to his knees and lifted up Jess' dark blue floaty top. He pressed his lips ever so gently to the tanned skin of her stomach, relishing the thought of their beautiful baby growing in there.
The couple were sat eating dinner later that evening. They had gone to bed after Jess' surprise, and had slept the whole way through. When they woke up, it appeared that the issue of Claire Stone was temporarily forgotten in wake of the baby news. As soon as they had woken up, Callum had told Jess to stay in bed while he got her a refreshing drink, and then he proceeded to make dinner for her, holding the chair out as she sat down and pushing her in. He had lit candles in the dining room, small tea lights in jewelled holders casting amber, jade and sapphire glows around the room.
"Wow, what's all this for?" Jess asked jokingly as she took a bite of lasagne.
"Well, now that you're pregnant, you shouldn't have to do everything all the time, let me pick up the slack." Callum said, pouring her a drink of water.
"Did you just say that you're gonna pick up some of the slack?" Jess asked, feigning shock. Callum laughed.
"I did, don't take advantage though." Callum joked.
"Oh honey, course I wouldn't. This is real good, did you make it yourself?" Jess asked in appreciation.
"No, course I didn't, I don't know how to cook food this well!" Callum replied.
"I'll have to teach you, because when the baby is born, trust me, I won't be cooking so much to start with." Jess said teasingly.
"I don't care, cause we're going to have a baby, and it's the best thing I've ever heard." Callum said quietly, looking intently at Jess. "When did you suspect that you were?"
"A few days ago. You know I was unwell not so long ago, and we thought it was fron the drink? I don't think it was. And I've been feeling quite tired lately and a bit bleh." Jess said.
"A bit bleh?" Callum mocked.
"Yes, a bit bleh. And of course, my bra was starting to feel a bit snug." Jess said with a wink across the table.
"Really? I might have to help you out with that. Have you told anyone else?" Callum asked, wondering if Jess had told Sally before telling him.
"Of course I haven't! I wouldn't dream of telling anyone before I told you! You thought I'd told Sally didn't you?" Jess said suspiciously.
"Well, you do seem to tell her things before me!" Callum said in his defence.
"Honey, a baby is a bit different though isn't it? I mean, you made this baby, this baby is yours. Of course you'd be the first to know." Jess said seriously. Callum reached across the table for Jess' hand. He gently rubbed his thumb against the back of her hand, smiling at her.
"You're really having a baby aren't you." he said quietly. She laughed.
"Yes honey, I really am having a baby, you're baby. Has it only just hit you?" she asked him.
"Uh, yeah I think so." he said, joining in with her laughter.
"I've booked a scan in for Thursday, cause that's the only day we're both off for a while." Jess informed him.
"You're having a scan already? Is that normal?" Callum asked.
"Yes it is, don't panic. It's just so that the pregnancy can be confirmed officially and they can take measurements of the baby. They should also be able to give us a rough date of when the baby will be due." Jess told him.
Callum quickly worked it out in his head, "So this is going to be a Christmas baby then?"
Jess nodded, "I think so."
"Wow, you don't need to get me anything for Christmas this year then." Callum said with a wink.
The following evening, Jess was at home alone. Callum had gone in covering Smithy's shift. Jess had finished her dinner and was lounging on the sofa when the doorbell rang. She looked at her watch and frowned. It was nearly ten in the evening, who would be calling at this hour. She got to her feet and slowly walked to the door. She saw a silhouette through the frosted glass of the door and unlocked it, opening it slowly.
"Claire? Is that you?" she asked, peering through the darkness to the woman on her doorstep.
"Erm yes. Could I talk to you please?" Claire asked, looking around Jess into the house.
"What about?" Jess asked suspiciously.
"Callum of course." Claire replied obviously.
"Ok, but not for long." Jess said, moving to the side so Claire could enter. Claire stood in the hall awkwardly as Jess shut the front door, relocking it. "Come through." Claire followed Jess into the darkened living room. "Would you like a drink?"
"Yes please. Tea please, milk with one sugar. Thank you." Claire replied gratefully, perching on the edge of the sofa.
"You can get comfy." Jess said with a slight smile, watching as Claire relaxed slightly. She walked into the kitchen, wondering why Claire wanted to talk to her, wondering if she knew that only Jess was in. She made the tea and grabbed herself a bottle of water from the fridge. She returned to the living room, handing Claire the hot mug.
"Thanks Jess." Claire said. Jess could see that was really trying, so she sat down and smiled.
"So, what did you want to know exactly?" Jess asked.
"The other day ended really badly." Claire said quietly.
"Yeah, understatement of the century perhaps?" Jess joked.
Claire smiled in return, "Yeah. The thing is, I know I went about it in completely the wrong way, and I know that I shouldn't have just popped out from nowhere and expected him to accept that I'm his sister. And I'm sorry for being rude to you, I just felt so confused and hurt and upset. I thought I'd lost the last of my family when mum died, because I had no clue how to find Callum even though I knew about him. Then to find him, and to see how much he looked like my dad, it was like having a part of my dad back. Does that make sense?"
Jess nodded, "It does. I think you're right about one thing; the way you went about introducing yourself to Callum as his sister was completely wrong. He doesn't want anything to do with you."
"That's why I wanted to talk to you." Claire began, "You're his wife, you know him better than anyone. How can I get him to talk to me?"
"There's your first mistake. You can't just get him to talk to you. You have to go about it slowly." Jess said knowledgably.
"How do I do that?" Claire asked, sipping her tea.
Jess wondered if she should be helping Claire. She knew that Callum didn't want to get to know her, but maybe he was just scared of being left again. She decided that he needed his family, and even though he may not like it, Claire was his family. Her earlier reservations of Claire disappeared and she leaned forward, "Ok, maybe write him a letter. Explain your story, tell him why you want to get to know him, maybe apologise for the way you went about it. Just put anything you've ever wanted to tell him down."
Claire thought about it for a minute and nodded, "Thank you Jess, I really mean that. If I were you, I wouldn't have helped me, not after the way I treated you last time." Claire looked ashamed at the memory.
"Honestly, it's ok, you were upset, and you wanted to talk to your brother without me there. I understand. Now, why don't you get started on this letter? Address it here." Jess said.
"Alright I will. Sorry for calling so late as well, I wanted to make sure Callum wasn't here." Claire said.
"Oh, before you go, two questions." Jess said as Claire began to get up.
"Yes?" Claire asked, waiting.
"First, how did you find out where we live?" Jess asked. Claire had the decency to look sheepish.
"I looked you up in the address book." Claire answered.
"Really? I could've sworn we were ex-directory." Jess said, confused. "Second question, how did you know Callum was out?"
"I rang the station and asked if he was there. Simple." Claire said with a slight smile.
"Simple but effective. Thanks for stopping by. I hope the letter goes well. I'll make sure he reads it." Jess said with a smile as she saw Claire to the door. "I was wrong about you Claire, and I'm sorry."
Claire smiled at the younger women, "It's fine, I was wrong about you too." The two woman nodded their heads at each other as Claire left the house into the darkness of the street.
Thursday morning came quickly for the couple. At breakfast, Callum couldn't stop smiling. He wolfed down the fry up Jess had made, even though they had an hour until the appointment. Jess laughed at him as he sped around the house, burning off nervous energy she thought.
"Are you not excited?" Callum asked as he came to a brief stop in the kitchen.
"Of course I'm excited, I'm just tired that's all." Jess said, and Callum noticed the bags under her eyes.
"You not been sleeping well?" he asked in concern, sitting next to her. Jess shook her head. The truth was, she'd been having vivid nightmares. They were always slightly different but they always had the same ending; with her baby dying. Just like Luke, just like Ellie, she dreamt that this baby, this sacred baby of Callum's, died and there was nothing she could do about it. It kept her up half the night; she didn't want to shut her eyes and see her baby lifeless over and over. "What's wrong Jess?" He always could tell when she was keeping something back.
"It's nothing, just a few nightmares, that's all." Jess said tiredly.
"It's more than nothing if it's keeping you awake. What are the nightmares about?" Callum asked gently.
Jess paused, wondering how much to reveal, "I keep dreaming that our baby dies, like Luke and Ellie did. All I can think about is that so far, any child of mine has died. What if I kill our baby Callum? What if another of my children dies?" Callum looked in alarm as tears dripped down Jess' face and her body began to shake.
"Hey, hey, come here." he pulled her tightly against him; she gripped his t-shirt in her hands, not wanting to let go. "Listen darlin', the deaths of Luke and Ellie were tragic, but they were accidents. They certainly weren't your fault, you understand? This baby won't die. You know why? Because we're it's parents."
"But I was Ellie and Luke's mother, and they still died. What if it's my fault? What if it's something to do with me?" Jess wailed. Callum took her face in his hands, forcing her to look at him.
"Look at me. You did not kill your children. There is nothing wrong with you. You are not to blame for their deaths, you understand? Now go and clean up, get your bag, and we'll leave for the hospital. Ok?" Callum said reassuringly.
"Ok. Sorry for that." Jess said, wiping her eyes, embarrassed.
"Don't you ever feel sorry for crying in front of me. I'm glad you told me. Now come on." Callum kissed the top of her head, watching as she placed her plate in the dishwasher and walked out the kitchen.
"Mrs Stone?" the sonographer called out to the full waiting room. Women in either the early stages of pregnancy or at the five month stage crowded the waiting room. Some had children with them, playing noisily in the corner; some were clearly first time parents, with both the woman and partner looking terrified and exhilarated at the same time; and some women were on their own, no partner or other children. Jess got to her feet, Callum right behind her, and followed the sonographer into a room. "Hello there. If you'd like to hop up onto the bed and lift your top up for me. Dad, if you want to sit here next to her." Callum exchanged an excited smile with Jess. They were about to see their baby for the first time. Jess slid onto the bed, lifting up her top, exposing her stomach. "I'm just going to put some gel onto your abdomen, it's going to be cold, sorry about that." The sonographer squirted the cold gel onto Jess' abdomen after placing a paper towel in the waistband of her jeans. He placed some gel onto the transducer as well. "Ready to meet your baby?"
"Very ready." Callum said with a laugh. He took Jess' hand in his, clasping it between both his hands. He pressed his lips against her fingers, his eyes fixed on the screen. The sonographer pressed the transducer firmly against Jess' abdomen, moving it around on her stomach. A grainy black and white picture appeared on the screen, but no baby so far.
"I get this all the time, not being able to find the little things." the sonographer said with a laugh. He stopped when he located the baby. "Ah here we go, he was just hiding, that's all."
"He?" Callum asked.
"Oh, I call all babies he. I don't know if your baby is a boy or girl. Sorry if I got your hopes up!" he said with a laugh.
"Right." Callum said, looking at the man closely.
"Ok, let's take some measurements." the sonographer said to himself.
"Can you hear our baby's heartbeat?" Jess said, turning her face momentarily to Callum. The persistant drumming noise filled the room.
"That's the heartbeat?" Callum asked in wonder. Jess nodded. "Is it supposed to be that fast?"
"Yeah, don't panic!" Jess said with a laugh. They both returned to looking at the screen, watching their tiny baby squirm.
"Ok, he seems to be about 1.4cm in length, and I'd guess his weight at just under a gram. He's about the size of a kidney bean. So, quickly working it out, I'd say you're due on the third of December." the sonographer said with a smile.
"That's our first wedding anniversary." Jess said with a beam.
"Wow, some present that will be! Would you like a print out of your baby?" he asked.
"Yes please." Callum said eagerly. The sonographer took some stills of baby Stone before printing them off. He handed Jess a paper towel to wipe the gel of her stomach.
"Here you go. Congratulations. I'll see you again in three months. Bye now." the sonographer said with a smile.
"A kidney bean?" Callum asked for what felt like the hundredth time. "He's the size of a kidney bean?"
Jess gently rubbed her hand on her stomach, "Yep, he's tiny."
"I just still can't believe it. That was just...something else." Callum said with a grin, turning the car down their road.
"Look at him. He's beautiful already." Jess said, cooing at the scan pictures.
"You know that now the pregnancy has been confirmed, you'll have to tell Inspector Gold and Smithy? And we'll have to do a risk assessment?" Callum checked as he pulled into a space in front of the house.
"Yeah I know. I'll tell them today when I go to work. I'll take the scan in as well." Jess said, getting out the car.
"I bet Inspector Gold will be pleased." Callum said with a smirk.
"No doubt she will be." Jess laughed, scooping the post of the mat as she walked through the door. She thumbed through them. They were all bills except for one addressed to Callum. Jess had an idea who it was from. "Callum? There's a letter here for you."
"For me? Sure it's not a bill?" Callum asked, taking it from Jess' hand.
"Nope, it looks like a letter. Who's it from?" she asked, knowing full well who it was from.
"I don't know, let me open it and find out!" Callum said, sitting down. Jess walked into the kitchen to get herself some water, and when she returned, Callum was reading through the letter. It appeared to be a few pages long. "It's from Claire." he said, putting the letter down next to him.
"Aren't you going to read it?" Jess asked, sipping her cold water.
"Did you know about this?" he asked suddenly, looking at her. She put on the most innocent face she could muster.
"No of course not. Why would I know about it?" Jess asked innocently. "But I do think you should read it. I'll be in the garden sunbathing when you've finished." And with that, Jess left Callum to read the letter from his sister Claire.