MsCinnamon – thank you for the review, I'm glad you think it's picking up pace a little. And I agree, re-reading, I realised it did sound a bit dodgy. If anything ever bugs you just tell me, that goes for everyone, okay, I appreciate it :)xx Thank you Krikanalo – I made silly mistakes, my bad :/ hopefully this chapter is better punctuation wise :') Ellinise – ah my loyal reviewer ;) glad you updated your story and I'm also glad you liked mine, and ah don't worry, Ellie will be fine with Sirius around :3 ehehe. Guest – Thank you! :D

A perfect time to talk about him.

She often thought about love. Like, what did it really mean? Was there any real definition? If love was giving someone the last cauldron cake, then Sirius did not love her. If love was letting someone win a game of Gobstones, then Sirius didn't love her. If it was glancing at someone in awe and treating them beautifully and calling them sweet names, then in no way did Sirius Black love her. Sure he called her 'love' but when he did, the tone dripped with malice.

She shook from her philosophical moment and glanced from each Slytherin player, to each Gryffindor player. Tension was in the air for every single person. The last game of the year and even Ravenclaws and Hufflepuffs were choosing sides and shouting leers at the 'enemy'.

Her eyes fell to Sirius, naturally. She thought back to her intense subject of love and then to their numerous interactions.

You confuse me all the time, Sirius.

Admittedly, he did look nice in his quidditch get up.

I don't know if you're going to be on my side, whenever things go wrong. And that's what scares me most.

I'll always be on your side Elladora, unless you give me a reason not to be.

It was hard trying to decipher Sirius Black. He was a confusing one and as he swaggered over to the stands, he grinned menacingly at Ellie and threw her a cheeky wink.

She didn't melt. Or her heart didn't flutter, that was just Sirius' normal behaviour.

She came to a conclusion. One she had been at multiple times: She didn't love him. She didn't. She liked the company and attention he had given her; but it wasn't true love she felt towards him. He was always mean and blunt, he hurt her feelings and he always copied her charms homework. She thought she liked him, Jesus, she adored his hair and his quidditch skills, but she wasn't sure that she loved him.

They stood there silently watching each other intensively.

He broke the silence with a small chuckle, "Going to wish me luck, darling?"

'Darling'? See, typical Sirius, he called everyone names like that, God, he even called Professor Sprout that.

She smiled softly. "Good luck you complete and utter moron."

"Must you wound me with your vicious words Elladora?"

"Must you confuse me with your devilish good looks?" she replied casually. A twinkle danced in his eyes as he grinned down at her.

A laugh escaped her lips as she gently punched him on the arm "Good luck, try to not fall and die, Sirius." he winked and clapped his hand on her shoulder before turning away and sauntering off to the remainder of the players.

She enjoyed the banter. She enjoyed the looks he gave her. The looks she gave him. They made her happy to know someone actually paid attention to her. But when she thought of how he looked at other girls like that, or when she thought to all the harsh things he had ever said to her, her heart resumed its normal constant thumping. She shouldn't live in the past. But it's hard to ignore something someone said, especially if they are one of the most important people in your life. She sighed. He was important to her. But did he feel the same way about her?

You're important Ellie.

Sure, he would say things like that. But when does Sirius Black ever really mean half the things he says, when does Sirius Black ever really feel anything sweet and sentimental towards anything but quidditch, food and his precious Marauders.

"Do you like him?" Dorcas whispered into her ear. The quidditch game was apparently getting into full swing now, Ellie didn't notice, quidditch was never really her thing. "Like, really like him?" Dorcas asked her lip curled up mockingly, she knew this subject made Ellie cringe a little inside.

She knew she had always found Sirius beyond unbearable but she also knew Ellie had a soft spot for him. A small soft spot. Tiny, in fact. She didn't love him. No matter how many times someone told her different, she knew deep down, she didn't love Sirius Black.

Ellie faced her friend, her eyes darting around agitated at the conversation already, "I really don't Dory, honestly" Dorcas scoffed disbelievingly. Ellie ignored it and continued. "I thought I did. I don't know, maybe a tiny bit, but no, not like like. God, what are we, 12?" she laughed. Dorcas giggled back quietly before recieveing a harsh 'shush' from Marlene. Marlene leapt up and screamed dangerously at Regulus Black, the seeker for Slytherin. Ellie's heart leapt to her moth – she'd hate to be on Marlene McKinnon's bad side, she was dangerous! Marlene sat back down and glanced dangerously at her friends to shut up.

Dorcas snickered. "It's okay to admit it, Ell. I think every female in this school has fancied Sirius at least once or at least acknowledged his good looks. It doesn't make you different or 'higher' if you pretend you don't fancy him"

"Dorcas!" Ellie whined. "Look, me and Sirius, it's weird. We flirt, we fight, we laugh – yeah it seems magical and typically lovey and what not, but no, I am not in love with Sirius Black."

"Okay, Ell." Her tone was disgustingly condescending. Dorcas wouldn't drop it. For now, she may have, but in five months time, it would creep back up and bite her on the butt. Ellie grimaced and unenthusiastically clapped at a goal being scored or someone falling.

But yes, the Sirius Black and Ellie Aldern dilemma had been a key topic of discussion for the Gryffindors. Ellie would here Marlene discussing it with James and Remus discussing it with Lily and a random 7th year discussing it with another random person. And of course Sirius would laugh and wink suggestively, heightening people's thoughts. The idiot.

But what she often thought: she'd do a lot of things for him, she would try to protect him as much as possible and sure he comforted her and helped her about the Aldern problem, sure he would sit with her and let her cry about failing transfiguration and yes he would let her shout at him and call him awful names when she was upset, but when it truly came down to it, did Sirius actually care about Ellie? Like properly? Like for real, would he protect her in a heartbeat, just like she would.

Most of the times, she would have no doubts about it, of course he would. But sometimes…sometimes Sirius Black was just too hard to decipher, too hard to assume.

She didn't love him. Much…

"ELLIE WATCH OUT!" Ellie looked up; whoever screamed after her had startled her from her pondering. As she peeked up, she saw the smooth round orb of a bludger flying towards her face.

A/N: Howdy, quite a short chapter, dedicated more to Ellie being Ellie and over analytical, as always. Please please tell me if parts of the chapter contradict itself, I was going for the 'in denial' and confusion side of love and hate and what not. This story is going on longer than I first expected :/ Having a dilemma with the 'other story' which will never ever make it up on here, obviously. Hope you're all have a lovely summer. xx