Rekindled Ashes

Chapter 37: Alterations

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight, sadly, otherwise I would have a nice log cabin in the woods where I would be a complete recluse and write until my heart was content. Instead, I have a full time job! So, that being said, the characters all belong to Stephenie Meyer, but the story came from my twisted little mind. Rated M.

We made plans to kiss the sun at night
Hopeless dreamers, hopeless types
One was turning, one was standing still
I won't forget what was promised here

Plans by Birds of Tokyo

Bella was still frozen, and Stacey was eyeing her carefully, unsure of whether she should move or not. Bella could see the conflict in the little girls eyes. She was scared. Bella knew that by the patter of her heart and the stink of adrenaline and fear that mingled with the child's blood.

Stacey could see Bella. But this new Bella looked all wrong to her.

Bella also understood that the little girl's blood should have smelled like ambrosia to her. She and Jasper had discussed bloodlust before. When they'd had their first talk in the corridor of the school, he'd explained a little bit of his awakening into his new life, how the blood created a frenzy in his mind so it was all he could think about.

Bella had expected that all encumbering need to happen. To take control of her like it had its own personality, but all she found was a slight burn in her throat from the very faint scent of Stacey's blood. Oddly, she was more interested in the beauty of the young girl in front of her. With her new enhanced sight, she could see natural highlights in the girl's hair, the flecks of brown in her wide blue eyes. She could hear a slight wheeze in the girl's chest as well, and somewhere in her mind she wondered whether she was getting a cold.

Next to her, she was also aware of Jasper's tension. He was poised, ready to strike like a cobra. Unsure of how she knew this, Bella focused more on the questions that came to her with the revelation. Could he not feel how relaxed she was? Did he really think she could ever hurt Stacey? For one brief moment, her eyes flickered to Jasper. To her surprise, he was watching her as though trying to get a read on her emotions.

"You can't read my emotions can you?" she whispered, unsure of how to react. She wanted to laugh and tease him, tell him it was no longer going to be easy for him, but she also knew that if he couldn't feel how relaxed she was, he would worry about her reaction to Stacey.

He shook his head and leaned in closer. "Talk to me. Is this too much?"

Bella shook her head, and glanced over at Stacey with a smile. The last thing on her mind was hurting the girl. "I can smell her, and . . ."

She blushed, unsure she wanted Stacey to hear what she was saying so she lowered her voice so that only Jasper could hear her.

"It smells amazing, but it's muted. Manageable. Like smelling something really good cooking, and thinking about what to have for dinner. There's no pull, like you described to me."

She sorted through the dull memories of their time together. It was so easy to think about, like a search engine. She looked for a memory and there it was. All the while she was still talking to Jasper, and keeping an eye on Stacey.

"Do you think . . .?"

"What's going on little bit . . .?" Rosalie asked trailing off as she saw Bella was wide-awake. In one quick, deliberate movement, she pushed Stacey behind her legs. "Jasper, what are you thinking, she could have . . ."

She trailed off, realizing Bella wasn't being restrained.

"Jasper?"

"She's fine. I'm not sure how, but there's no bloodlust."

Rosalie's golden colored eyes widened. Bella could see her dark pupils contracting as more light filtered in, for a moment she was distracted by a dust mote floating in the air between them. Her eyes seemed to focus on that but were still able to process what Rosalie was doing.

She thought about why everything had changed so dramatically, other than the obvious point that she was now a vampire. Having been with the Cullen's for a while now, she understood some of the intricacies of their species. None of them had been shy in answering the questions she'd had. It wasn't as though she'd been canvassing in hopes that she would become one of them, more that it would help her understand them more, and the things they did. But that wasn't the point, was it. That wasn't the mystery she was trying to solve. Her cavernous mind seemed to pull her in several different directions before she finally managed to fall back into the prior train of thought.

Jasper was watching her with amusement. He may not have been able to feel her emotions, but he'd been there, he'd experienced what she had and he was probably reliving his own awakening as he watched her.

Once again Bella found herself sliding off the path of forethought. She needed to grasp onto her theory and state it before something else distracted her.

"I have a theory." Bella grinned. "Could it be this shield thing? If you can't read my emotions, maybe it's grown stronger?"

"It's a possibility, but do you really think Stacey is the one to test this out on?" Rosalie asked, still shielding the small girl behind her.

"No. It's not a good idea." Bella replied, with a small wink to Stacey. "As much as I would love to tug her into my arms and hug her, I have no control over my strength, and I'm not sure how close she could get without something changing. Maybe," she looked to Stacey. "Maybe you and I can talk later, munchkin, when we've figured some things out?"

Stacey peered around Rosalie's legs. Her smile now in place as her blue eyes regarded Bella. Bella longed to reassure the girl that everything would be all right, but she was terrified of hurting her. Her scent still wasn't bothering Bella, but that didn't mean the burn in her throat wasn't growing with each breath.

"Will you be okay?" Stacey asked. "Sammy said that you may have to go away for a while because you're like Jasper now."

"Well, that all depends on how quickly I get used to all of this." Bella grinned. "Right now, I don't think it will take too long, but you never know. Will you be alright for a few days with Sammy?"

"Yu huh, but you promise to say goodbye if you have to leave?"

"I promise." Bella laughed, her head swirling with the foreign sound. She crossed her heart with her finger. It was weird not feeling a beating in there. For twenty years, that's all she'd known, and now it was just a useless organ in her chest. She longed to hug Stacey and reassure her, so much so that her arms almost ached. The fact that she couldn't, however, was just as alien to her as her non-beating heart.

"Okay." Stacey grinned, the thud of her heart dancing in her chest. She hesitated at the door, unsure of how to leave without a departing hug. "Remember you promised."

Bella tapped her temple, her own smile matching that of Stacey's. "I have photographic memory now. No forgetting anymore."

Stacey disappeared, leaving in her wake a child's giggle. Rosalie watched after her for a while to make sure she was gone before turning back on Jasper.

"Why would you even take the risk?"

"I didn't, she came looking for me. I thought you were supposed to be watching her."

"She was taking a nap with Samantha."

"Guys." Bella interjected with a sigh. "No one's fault. She's six and curious."

Jasper and Rosalie went silent. There was, what seemed to be, a silent exchange between them. Then both relaxed and their gazes turned on Bella. Rosalie was smiling at her, but Jasper was beaming.

"You're stunning." Rose laughed, holding out her hand to Bella. "Not that you weren't before."

"I think I'll take that as the compliment it was intended to be." Bella mused, taking Rose's hand with her right and running her left hand through her hair. It was more out of habit than necessity. The strands danced through her fingers. They were soft and silky, and tickled her palm.

"Good. Now lets get you out of the house so you can hunt. After that we can try introducing you to a human a little older than six, with more comprehension of what's going on."

It sounded like a plan to Bella. As much as she wanted a hot shower and a change of clothes, she still wasn't sure what hunting would consist of. So she nodded and moved, gracefully, between Rosalie and Jasper. Allowing them escort her toward the front door.

They managed to get downstairs with no incidents. Carlisle was lingering by the door that led to the kitchen, where Bella could smell food that would have once triggered her hunger. Now though, it only turned her stomach. It smelled wrong.

"Bella." He breathed, breezing toward her with miraculous speed. Neither the movement nor the quickness bothered Bella, but she was surprised how easily she followed the action. There was no longer a blur, just motion with small bands of tracers that seemed to shimmer around him.

Carlisle hesitated for only a second before pulling her into a fatherly embrace, his lips brushing across his forehead as though glad that his panic was unfounded. Knowing him as well as she did, Bella suspected that he'd been worried about keeping her in the house with the humans around.

"You heard?" Jasper asked, his hand slipping over Bella's wrist and sliding down until his fingers tangled with hers.

Carlisle nodded as he released her with a smile. "I had a feeling she would be remarkable, but once again she exceeds expectations."

"If this keeps up I am going to be the first vampire with the ability to blush." Bella teased, leaning into Jasper's side.

Carlisle rested a hand on her cheek gently as he smiled at her. "I'm just glad to see you're okay. How is your thirst?"

"Starting to burn my throat, but there's still no reaction to the humans I can smell in the kitchen. Is that normal?"

"There's nothing normal about you." Jasper laughed, squeezing her hand.

Bella nudged him with her elbow and marveled that her bone wasn't aching from the contact. This was part of this new life she could get used to.

"What if I have the same deal with animal blood?"

"You could try dropping your shield a little." Eleazar chuckled, appearing from the basement with Carmen in tow. "I can't even sense you have a talent anymore, it's quite spectacular. Just do as I taught you in reverse, but do it away from the house. The last thing you want is human blood to affect you. Just experiment a little while you're out there."

Bella cocked an eyebrow in amusement. He made it sound so easy, but she was still reeling from all of this new information. Everything seemed to offer a distraction. Even stood here listening to them speak to her, her mind was on the small fragments of glass, still littering the living room floor sending off a spectrum of light. The sound of idle chatter between the humans in the kitchen, while knives and forks scraped plates. Even the footsteps above her and the sound of the wolves camping out back caught her attention. How was she supposed to focus on just one thing?

"Should we take Emmett and Edward?" Jasper asked, finally pulling Bella back into the foyer. "The Volturi are still here and the last thing we want is to be cornered by them. They would still out number us, but it would be worth having backup."

"As much as I hate to admit it, I think you're right. Having Bella out in the forest hunting would be too much of a draw for Aro to ignore. I'm not sure he would try an aggressive move, but we can't take any chances."

Before Jasper could even call the two of them, Emmett and Edward appeared from the basement. Emmett was smiling, and Edward seemed solemn.

"Be careful," Carlisle advised. "We'll keep the humans safe, in case it's another kind of opportunity they're looking for."

Bella felt a small twitch of rage boil in the depths of her mind. The thought of the Volturi coming to feed from the human's she'd all but died to protect made her protective side flare to life.

"Go, and we'll talk more when you get back."

. . .

Jasper guided Bella from the house by her hand. He still couldn't feel her emotions, but he was growing accustomed to reading her facial features. As far as he could tell, she was battling with her emotions. She couldn't seem to stop at just one either. To him, her red eyes looked as though they were flicking through the whole range of them to find the one that should pertain to the situation.

He squeezed her hand, an odd sensation considering he didn't need to audit himself and restrain his strength. Her eyes flickered to him only briefly before a small smile danced across her lips. He led her down the front porch steps and across the lawn toward the river. They needed to get deeper into the forest and quickly. He just hoped that the Volturi didn't have spies watching them. Not that he would put it past them. Aro had set his sights on her, and he'd had never been more aware of anything in his life.

Jasper could feel the emotions of his two brothers and sister as they headed toward the forest. Emmett, was simply happy she'd survived, not matter what form it was in. Rosalie was relieved that Bella seemed to have control, and Edward; well he was stewing in a mixture of guilt and sadness. As far as Jasper could tell, he felt responsible for not being closer and protecting her. Jasper knew that feeling well.

Each of them had their own twinges of guilt over Bella's loss of human life. There wasn't one vampire in their house that hadn't felt as though they could have done something more. Even Kelly felt responsible. She believed if she had rolled that bottle to Bella sooner, perhaps Maria would never have had the opportunity to strike. Not only were their emotions out and openly on their sleeves, but Jasper had heard them talking over the past three days.

He didn't blame any of them. In truth, he believed the only person to blame was himself. He could have ended the fight with Maria at least three times, but he kept it going, exercising the part of himself that missed the aggressive side to their life. He believed he had sentenced Bella to this life and he had promised her, while she writhed with pain, that he would spend an eternity making it up to her.

As they ran toward the river, he chanced a look over at Bella. She was beaming, her smile gracious and beautiful as her hair trailed behind her. She was looking around and drinking everything around her in, her head occasionally turning to discover the source of a noise or sudden movement.

As the others sprang from the bank to the opposite side, Bella dug in her heels and pulled her hand from Jasper's easily. She slid toward the edge and backpedaled until she was stable. The others hadn't noted their disappearance from the ranks yet and continued into the forest.

"Bella?"

"Sorry." She laughed humorlessly. "Twenty years as a human and my brain is confused. My brain is telling me I can do this, but my body is doubtful, because I've never been able to do it before."

"It takes a little getting used to," Jasper said gently, rubbing her arms as she leaned into him. "Believe me, this is completely normal. Most of us discovered what we could do by trial and error. No matter how many times someone tells you that you can do something, there's no way of knowing until you try. If you'd prefer to run through the river, no one will think any less of you."

"I will." She murmured, her cheek against his shoulder as she watched the racing water. "You have any tips?"

"Have fun?" He grinned. "You want me to go first?"

Bella nodded. Jasper could have made the jump from the complete standstill he was at on the banks, but he was neither inclined to show off, nor was he giving her confidence if he was to do so.

Instead, he backed up ten paces and ran at the bank, leaping as he reached Bella. His muscles projected him into the forest on the opposite side. As he touched down, he slid to a stop and turned around, waving the others to stay where they were as they retreated to rejoin them. He stepped through the trees and smiled at Bella across the river.

"Just think of it as hopping over a log. Your body will push you the distance."

Bella nodded. There was no embarrassment in her eyes, just determination and frustration at herself for stopping in the first place. She backed up and sprinted toward the edge, pushing off at the last possible moment.

She soared overhead and landed nimbly on two feet. She didn't stop there. She took off with a small laugh and called out with a challenge to catch her, if they could.

All four of them ran behind her. She was fast in her new body, he figured dancing between trees and launching over fallen trees. Occasionally, she would gain ground and leave them behind, which was when Edward, the fastest of them, sped up and kept an eye on her.

As much as he hated to admit it, Jasper was enjoying seeing Bella like this. Her body was curved and slender, the muscles she'd already had were accentuated. Her hair flew behind her as she ran, and her laughter . . . He couldn't ever have asked for anything more perfect. She was taking every part of this in her stride and finding the positive in a negative situation. He'd never admired her more than he did in that moment.

They headed up the mountain faster than they normally traveled. This game of chase, as exciting as it was, was certain to come to an end when Bella scented the mountain lions that had reclaimed the territory. As he and his siblings tore up the mountainside behind Bella, he finally caught wind of the prey and smiled.

"Hold up, darlin'." He heard the pronunciation he'd used, making it sound more like Dah-lin in his southern accent. Whether it was intentional or not, it had the desired effect on Bella. Her running slowed until she stopped, turning on him with a radiant smile.

"I like that." She sang, dancing toward him.

"I'm happy to oblige." He continued on, pulling her into his arms. Emmett choked back a laugh and tried to disguise it as a cough, but Jasper could feel the humor rolling from him in waves. Humor and happiness, he apparently liked seeing Jasper with a mate, at least that seemed to be what his emotions were giving away.

"So." Bella asked, trying to hide her excitement. "Why'd we stop?"

"Sniff the air." Jasper whispered into her ear. One of his hands brushed the strands of hair over her shoulder. "Concentrate, and tell me what you can smell."

"Something gamey." She whispered, her head tipping and her nose inhaling the breeze. "Big, four legs, a predator I think."

All of them stood still and watched as her eyes slid closed, trying to glean more information from the surrounding air. Jasper reveled in the freedom to admire her beauty. She was resplendent. Her hair was fuller and shinier, her skin, now the same temperature as his was soft under his touch. Her body, so lithe and curved in her human form, moved like a predator with the grace of a ballerina. He found himself looking forward to time alone with her.

"That's all I'm getting." She sang, titling her head up into the breeze, her lashes dusting her cheek as she concentrated a little harder.

"Any instincts to push you toward it?"

Bella shrugged. "My throats burning a bit more than it was, but I don't think that's because of the scent."

"Can you try and pull back your shield. Test out the air and see if there's any difference?"

Bella nodded and tried to concentrate on the lessons Eleazar had given her what felt like a lifetime ago. In hindsight, it was less than a week. Jasper and the others stayed quiet as Bella tuned in her concentration. There were flickers of her emotions as she pushed herself. Frustration, determination, confusion, and then she opened up completely, bloodlust pulsing through her veins.

Bella let out a roar and took off toward the scent Jasper had pointed out to her. Before he could follow, Edward's hand landed against his chest. His smirk was obvious, and his emotions seemed just as gloating. It took Jasper less than thirty seconds to realize what had happened.

"Her shield's all the way down," he said calmly.

Edward nodded.

"You can hear her thoughts." Not a question.

Edward nodded. "If you follow her too closely she will turn on you. Every part of her is attuned to the prey she's running toward. Mine is another prevalent thought."

They waited another thirty seconds before following Bella into the woods and the now open blood source. Jasper was the first to the scene. Edward was faster, but seemed to realize that this was Jasper's territory. Hearing Bella's thoughts meant he could judge her mood and her frame of mind. Coupled with Jasper's ability to read her emotions, they almost knew what they would find.

The others hung back as Jasper slipped through a line of trees. He'd known that what he was going to find wasn't going to be pretty, and he wasn't wrong. He'd felt Bella's guilt and horror at what she'd done, the moment the animal had been drained. What she wouldn't understand for a long time is that she didn't have a choice. The moment she let down that shield, her instinct would take over and her bloodlust would drive her. He hated seeing her looking helplessly down at the animal as her fingers tangled through the thick, coarse, golden coat.

As he stepped into the cluster of trees, her shield blocked him out again.

"Bella?"

"I'm okay. Just . . . Well, I think next time maybe I shouldn't take the shield down all the way. That wasn't exactly what I'd planned."

"It takes some getting used to."

She nodded and sighed. Her hands still making a repetitive motion in the animals fur. He knew what she was thinking, without even having the access to her emotions.

"I know it's hard, darlin', but it either this or humans. If it makes you feel any better, we would never let them go extinct."

She half laughed and raised her eyes to his. It took only a second for her to pull in a deep breath and blow it out with resolve.

"What next?" She asked, sliding out from under the animal and looking around.

"Well, we used to bury them," Edward said, stepping up next to Jasper.

"Now," Rosalie said, stepping through with her hand in Emmett's. "We don't bother. It seems like a waste when the meat could feed other animals in the forest."

"So you have your own eco-system out here?" Bella smiled, wiping her mouth with her sleeve and balking at the slight dribbles of blood. She shook it off and looked back up at Jasper. "That makes it a little easier to stomach."

He gave her a smile, which she returned brightly with another kind of hunger. One he'd been too preoccupied to even think about himself. She reached for him; her smile still firmly in place, but it only took a minute for that to change. One snap of a twig, and she spun around, her arms out wide, body in front of Jaspers, protecting him. It would have been funny had she not had reason to react.

Authors Note: So Bella's adjusting little by little, and Jasper is falling more in love with her with every second that passes. Unfortunately, they still have some unfinished business to take care of. We're coming closer and closer to the end of the story. I'm really gonna miss these guys!

I have been working on a couple new stories to post and when I get to the epilogue I will add a teaser to the authors note so you guys can see whether or not it's something you're interested in!

Thank you to all of you for reading, adding to your favorites, alerting and reviewing. You really do blow me away with your encouragement and support and I love you guys for it.

Thank you as always to Hev99 and Sabi'sSookie. You two are amazing and I really am lucky to have you both in my life! Love you guys!

MWAH!