Herschel Presents: Candlehead's DuMbEsT MoMeNtS

Episode 35: The Unwanted Guest

Hey guys and it's so good to see you guys again! Welcome back to Candlehead's Dumbest Moments! This time, we have another treat suggested by Agent BM. In this little escapade, Candlehead burns her house down (again) and she invites herself (without telling any of the Fluggerbutters) to stay at the Castle. Just imagine the shit that'll go wrong!

Lucy and Kevin belong to Agent BM

Also, HAPPY 17TH BIRTHDAY TO AGENT BM! ROUND OF APPLAUSE PLEASE!

OMG Guys, today, Aric Almirola won in the #43 Air Force Ford for Richard Petty. THIRTY YEARS AGO on Friday, Richard Petty collected his 200th career victory at Daytona in the 43 STP car. So special for that!

CAN WE GET TO 295 TODAY PLEASE!

(Candy Grove)

Two Twizzler Firetrucks were firing Lemonade on the fire consuming Candlehead's Mint Cupcake house. The other racers stood behind the firetrucks to see the donut firefighters putting out the blaze. "What happened this time Candles?" Sticky asked as she kept Ella by her side.

"I don't know what could've caused this one," a burnt Candlehead replied, "I just dropped my keys into my kart's gas tank and just lit a match to see, I can't explain it!" A Flabbergasted Candlehead exclaimed. Herschel shook his head and ran a hand through his hair.

"Ya know, her stupidity used to be funny, now I'm worrying about her Wipp," Herschel whispered to Sticky. Finally, the fire went out and Candlehead's house collapsed in a heap of burnt cupcake rubble.

"Not again!" Vanellope punched a candy cane tree, frightening Rancis, Lucy and Kevin.

"Fire's out, go home everybody!" The fire chief called out. The firefighters scribbled down their bill and handed it over to Vanellope, whom promptly ripped it up and stomped on the ground.

"Candlehead, I've HAD it with your carelessness about flames and fire; this is the TENTH time the fire department has had to put out a fire at your house. I'm DONE paying for it to be fixed, so you'll pay every cent!" Vanellope yelled at Candlehead. Everybody backed off, afraid of Vanellope's rage. Her eyes were glowing red with anger as she stared down the Candle racer.

"Daddy, is Mommy gonna kill Candlehead?" Lucy held onto Rancis' jacket sleeve.

"There's a good chance baby," Rancis replied.

"Okay, how much is it?" Candlehead whipped out a checkbook with a grin. Vanellope's eyes returned to Hazel and she stuttered, trying to piece together a sentence.

"Uh, just 5,000 gold coins," Vanellope said in a dumbfounded tone. Candlehead scribbled down the amount on the check and gave it to Vanellope, whom put it away in her hoodie pocket. "Well then, find out where you're staying," Vanellope turned around and got back in her kart with her family. Candlehead looked around to the other racers who quickly got back in their karts, drove home and locked their doors.

"Hmm, I have an idea," Candlehead said after thinking about it for a minute.

(At The Castle)

Rancis and Vanellope had gotten Kevin and Lucy in bed and were trying to get to sleep. "Nelly, should we just let Candlehead live near the Grape Soda river?" Rancis asked as Vanellope got into her night wear and climbed into bed with him, "I mean, if she did, what would be the odds of another fire?" He asked.

"What if she keeps parking her kart and it falls in the river?" Vanellope retorted.

"Right. How about we move the Fire Station right next to her house?" Rancis suggested.

"That would cost too much Flugs," Vanellope replied, "we just need to make sure she doesn't destroy more stuff. She may be in her own game, but it gets really old when we have to keep cleaning up her messes," Vanellope cuddled up to Rancis. He yawned and wrapped his arm around Vanellope.

"Yeah, we should just sleep on it Nelly," Rancis replied and shut his eyes. Not five seconds later, there was a deafening crash in the kitchen. Rancis and Vanellope shot up out of bed and looked at each other. Their bedroom door flew open and two bright blue pixelated lights shot into their bed.

"MOM! DAD! Someone's in the kitchen!" Kevin exclaimed and hid between his mom and dad. Rancis and Vanellope looked at each other again and hugged their cowering children.

"Stay here," Rancis said and pulled out his .44 magnum pistol from his nightstand.

"Flugs," Vanellope started.

"No Nelly, there's an intruder and you know we have a right to defend ourselves," he butted in and cocked the pistol.

"Oh I know Flugs, I was just gonna bring this," Vanellope replied and pulled out a machete.

"You're so hot when you're tough and protective," Rancis drooled.

"EWW!" Kevin and Lucy covered their ears and eyes.

"Right, right, stay here kids and lock the door," Vanellope instructed as she shut the door. The two parents crept quietly down the hall where there was some rustling in the kitchen.

"Okay, you go left and I'll go right," Rancis whispered to his wife.

"Gotcha," Vanellope replied and raised her machete. The two jumped into the kitchen and yelled a battle cry.

"AHHHH!" Candlehead screamed and let her boiling pot fly. The hot water splashed onto the wall.

"WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE!?" Vanellope demanded.

"Well you said for me to find a new place to stay until my house is fixed, so here I am!" Candlehead replied.

"Candles, we didn't say you could stay here," Rancis put down his pistol.

"But you guys never said I couldn't stay," Candlehead pointed out. "And I really have nowhere else to go," Candlehead said sadly. Rancis and Vanellope looked at each other and shrugged their shoulders.

"Oh fine, but you sleep in the living room and DON'T touch anything without asking!" Vanellope exclaimed, "I'm going back to bed, Flugs come on," she ordered Rancis. The two left the kitchen where Candlehead fixed up a Peanut Butter sandwich.

"Hmm, I think this place could use some redecorating," she said to herself as she left the kitchen with the stove still on. Candlehead walked into the main living area and parked herself on the couch with her sandwich, smearing some peanut butter on the back.

(The Next Morning)

"AHHHHH!" Vanellope screamed as she awoke to see a pair of piercing red eyes staring back at her. She pulled out a plasma rifle and blasted it away.

"NELLY WHAT'S GOING ON!?" Rancis screamed as he awoke.

"Why is there a Terminator in my room!?" Vanellope demanded. Candlehead came running in and picked up the severed skull.

"Oh there goes the dummy I made for you," Candlehead said sadly.

"What dummy?" Vanellope asked.

"Well, I know how much you love Terminators, so I was redecorating your room in a Terminator fashion," Candlehead explained. Vanellope looked all around the room and shrank back to her husband. On the wall in front of their bed was a giant face of a T-1000 with eyes moving back and forth. Always Watching was printed below the face.

"WHAT MADE YOU THINK THAT WAS A GOOD IDEA!?" Vanellope yelled. Before Candlehead could answer, Kevin screamed form his room. The three adults hustled on down to Kevin's room to find him kneeling over some broken debris.

"Kevin son, what happened?" Rancis asked.

"M-my Death Star, it's destroyed! So is my limited edition signed X-Wing fighter!" He cried out.

"Oh yeah! I was having a little tiny scaled battle last night until they both fell from my grip and onto the floor! You should really keep those in locked cabinets," Candlehead replied. Rancis left the room to get a broom and dust pan when he looked into his private video game room and screamed.

"WHERE ARE MY GAMES AND CLASSIC CONSOLES!?" He yelled and started to frantically search around. Vanellope turned to Candlehead and waited an explanation.

"Well, those games were SO old, and so were those consoles. I figured they were just gathering dust, so I put them in the incinerator," Candlehead explained. Rancis started shaking violently, pulled his Reese's hat off and snapped it in two.

"Candles, I think you'd better go," Vanellope said as she patted Rancis' and Kevin's shoulder.

"Aw Mommy," Lucy said and hugged Vanellope's leg, "she was just trying to thank us for letting her stay here," she defended Candlehead. Vanellope looked down at the smaller, blonde-haired copy of herself and patted her head.

"Fine, but one more screw up Candles, and you're GONE," Vanellope warned.

"Fair enough, come on, I've got a roaring fire going!" Candlehead declared.

"Wait a minute," Vanellope said, "we didn't have any firewood yet, where did you get-" Vanellope started before she saw a pile of MLP toys. Candlehead picked up half a dozen and chucked them in the jolly rancher fire place.

"MY PONIES! NO!" Lucy screamed and tried to glitch into the fire.

"LUCY NO!" Vanellope caught her daughter just in time. Lucy began to cry at her ponies being burnt. Vanellope and Rancis' eyes turned red and they slowly turned around to Candlehead.

"Guys, what's with the creepy eyes?" Candlehead asked.

(outside)

Outside the Castle, Candlehead's body broke through a window and crashed into the top of a candy cane tree. "Now where will I stay?" Candlehead thought.

End Episode 35