Previously…

"What are you saying?" I whispered.

Dr Ridgely paused, looking at Edward. I didn't want to look at him, fearing that if Edward looked upset then I wouldn't have any hope to hold on to.

Then, Dr Ridgely looked back at me. "Miss Swan, I'm sorry, but your daughter is in a coma."

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A Million More Mistakes- Chapter 36

Through the storm we reach the shore.

You give it all but I want more.

And I'm waiting for you.

With or without you.

With or without you.

I can't live,

With or without you.

-With or without you, U2

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Edward POV

The ninth ward. The moment those words had left Dr Ridgely's lips, I knew what had happened. A coma. My little girl was in a coma. I had kidded myself that this wouldn't happen. Sure, the most extreme cases of hypothermia led to coma and then death, but that would never happen to Natty. I saw Dr Ridgely look at me and I realised that Bella had been questioning him and that he didn't want to be the one to tell her. But I certainly wasn't going to.

So I made no effort to pull any sort of emotion back to my face and continued to stare blankly at nothing.

"Miss Swan, I'm sorry, but your daughter is in a coma."

There was silence. I didn't want to look at Bella, fearing what I would see, so I waited for her to say something.

However, to my intense surprise, Bella laughed. "No she's not," she said.

I snuck a glance at her face. On the surface was amusement, but still a little panic. But in her eyes was torture. I could see in her usually beautiful chocolate eyes that the panic, stress and sleep deprivation had driven her crazy. Maybe not in the literal sense of the word, but it was obvious that nothing anyone said now would make sense to her.

When no one said anything, the amusement slipped from her face. "No she's not!" she repeated more forcefully. She looked at me. "Edward?"

I just shook my head slowly.

Now the devastation I saw in her eyes seeped visibly on to her face. "What? No. No, she's fine."

"Miss Swan, I'm very sorry…"

Bella's mood did an extraordinarily quick 180. "No you're not!" she yelled. "Why didn't you save her? You could have saved her!"

"She's not dead," Dr Ridgely reminded her. "Just in a coma. There is still hope and we will do everything we can to save her."

Bella took a deep breath. "I want to see her."

Dr Ridgely simply nodded.

***

Half an hour later, we were with Natty. She was wired up to a life support machine now as well, the heart monitor beeping loudly and annoyingly. Bella was sat by Natty's side, talking to her. I couldn't hear what she was saying from where I stood in the corner. I wanted to be there with her, talking as well, but something told me that I didn't belong there. I knew that this was ridiculous; that I was Natty's father and I belonged by her side as much as Bella did, but the years of being shut out of her life made me feel like I was prying as I watched Bella stroke Natty's palm, reminding Natty of things they had done, as Dr Ridgely had recommended.

Time passed slowly and I didn't know what to do with myself, so I sat down and watched until sleep claimed me. I didn't sleep well – far from it – and I worried that Bella needed the sleep much more than I did, but whenever I woke she was still awake, still babbling away to Natty.

Once I offered to swap places with her, but she refused so vehemently that I didn't speak up again. Forever and always was a long time, and I was beginning to wonder if it was even possible. I loved Bella with my entire being, but if Natty didn't make it, I couldn't see how she would ever carry on. If I had been there since Natty was a baby, then I was sure that I'd be much the same, but I hadn't, so I was able to keep a reasonable mind.

I sighed and thought of how Bella had been just a few days earlier, when she had woken me, smiling and laughing. I hadn't seen her eyes sparkle in the same way since. I closed my eyes, picturing her glittering eyes in my mind and fell asleep still thinking of them.

Slowly, time began to lose meaning. It passed, and that was all that we could ask for. Time went by and Natty stayed the same. It must have been nearly two days since Natty fell into a coma and I was extremely worried about Bella. As far as I knew, she hadn't eaten or slept since. We had also had no contact with the outside world aside from one more call I had made to Alice to tell her about Natty.

She had steered the conversation away from Natty after I had mentioned it, for which I was grateful. She told me about how Charlie had come to visit Bella and ended up staying for coffee with Alice instead before going home without even coming here, not wanting to bother us. She told me about how Rose, Emmett and Chelsea had returned home now as well, healthy and happy. She told me how she was getting on with the twins.

It seemed like months since Bella and I had seen any of them or spoken to any of them, though it had only been a matter of days. I felt bad for abandoning them, but Alice insisted that they all understood completely.

"Natty, please," Bella begged, bringing me back to the present.

I stood up and walked over to her. "Bella… come and get something to eat. Please."

She glared at me. "I'm not leaving her."

"But me bringing you food doesn't work," I said; this hadn't been the first time I had mentioned my concern and she had agreed that she'd eat if I brought her something. She hadn't.

"I have to keep talking to her," Bella insisted. "If I stop then she won't remember."

"She'll always remember," I said softly. "Please. I'll talk to her. Just eat something and have a little sleep. You have to think about the baby…"

Then she snapped. "Yeah, I have to think about the baby," she growled, leaping to her feet. "That's all it is with you, Edward. Baby this, baby that… you don't even care about Natty. Is this your way of getting back at me for not telling you about her? Because it's not working. If this is how much you care then why are you here?"

Her words stung, but I could see why she'd made the assumption. I had been trying desperately to stay strong for her sake, and had prided myself on showing little emotion, but this had given her the wrong impression. "Bella, I…"

"Whatever Edward. Piss off. Get out. Natalie is my daughter and, believe it or not, I care whether she lives. You clearly don't, so just… go away. You don't belong here."

I stared at her for a long moment, and then I left the room. Not because I didn't belong, but because I couldn't take it any more. I didn't want to fight with Bella, despite the untrue accusations she threw at me. I loved her and I knew that she loved me back, that it was the stress and sleep deprivation talking now, but she wasn't the only one that was stressed. I constantly felt like I was being torn apart, piece by piece, but I couldn't say anything because I didn't want to make Bella worse. I only wanted her to eat something and sleep for a little bit; I didn't deserve the berating I got in exchange for my advice.

I flopped into a chair outside the room and let my head fall into my hands. I wanted to shout and scream and… just let everything out like Bella did. I wanted to hit something. I wanted to curse at someone. I wanted to yell out that praying didn't work because my family was falling apart despite everything. I wanted to get back at who had done this to us. I wanted sweet, sweet revenge.

I stood up and headed outside so that I could make a call on my phone. I still had her number from when Natty had gone to their house that day; she had been more than willing to give it to me.

"Hello?" that sickly sweet voice said unsuspectingly when she picked up the phone.

I forced my voice to sound steady. "Hi Tanya. This is Edward Cullen."

"Oh, hi Edward." She immediately sounded more enthusiastic. "What can I do for you at this early hour?"

"Early?" I questioned; I was sure that it was afternoon. Mind you, my judge of time was under a misapprehension at the moment.

"Yes," she said slowly. "It's half nine. Well, it's not that early but I usually sleep in until…"

I cut her off. "I was just wondering whether… you'd like to meet up for coffee?"

I could practically hear her cat-got-the-cream grin. "What now?"

"If that's okay with you."

"It's fine," Tanya said. "I'll leave Carmen at home. She'll be okay by herself for a while."

I was disgusted at her morals, but I knew that I would be unable to get proper revenge if a small child was watching, so I agreed and arranged to meet her at 'The Coffee Bean' in twenty minutes.

I got there ten minutes later and paid for a black coffee. Then I waited. Fifteen minutes later, the strawberry blonde came in, smiling. She went up to the till and ordered herself a cappuccino and me another black coffee before coming and sitting opposite me.

I didn't know how to start so I didn't say anything. I stared at her. Seeing this bitch again made anger flare within me; everything was her fault. My little family had been destroyed by her, as she no doubt intended. Maybe not exactly like this but still…

"So what did you want?" she asked, sounding hopeful.

I fought to keep my tone civil. "Take a walk with me?"

"Can't we stay here?" She pouted.

"You got a take-away cappuccino, didn't you?" I stood up and left the coffee shop, knowing that she'd follow. I knew that there was a lake nearby where kids came to feed the ducks. I set a fast pace, hearing Tanya's heels clacking wildly as she tried, and failed, to keep up with me. It had started to rain and she was mumbling complaints about how her hair was getting wet. I stopped suddenly by a bench in front of the pond. I recognized it from one of Bella's home videos where she had tried to stop Natty from falling in and they had both slipped and gone in, with Rose laughing at them from behind the camera. I remembered thinking how we could bring the new baby here when it was older and that Natty would tell it about the time that their Mummy pulled her in.

But now that was far from likely to happen, all because of the woman stood behind me. A tear escaped from my left eye and I hurriedly wiped it away.

"What, Edward?" Tanya asked impatiently. "Are you sure that this is important?"

That did it. I spun round to face her, seething. "My daughter is dying because of you and that bitch that you call a child!"

Tanya looked alarmed. "What?"

I clenched my fists, forgetting that I had a polystyrene cup of boiling coffee in one of them. It cracked and the hot water scalded my hand, but I didn't care. "Natty ran away because of the crap that you fed to her through your spawn. She got caught in that storm and got hypothermia. Now she's in a coma at the hospital, dying and it's all your fault." I shook my head slowly, my body shaking with the anger I felt.

I expected her to be shocked and to feel bad. But what she said just made me feel even crosser.

"I don't know what you're talking about."

I slapped her sharply across the face. "Yes you do!" I yelled. "You told her that we don't love her and she believed you. How can you live with yourself knowing that you tortured a five year old like that?"

"You slapped me!" She gasped.

I shook my head in disbelief. "How can you stand there and take it so calmly? How can you not feel in the slightest bit bad that a child is dying because of the things you said to her."

Tanya glared at me. "The stupid kid deserves it," she hissed.

Then I lost it. I balled up my fists and hit her. Scarlett blood poured from her nose and she screamed at me scratching my face with her long nails, but I didn't care. I could feel that she had drawn blood, but I continued to hit her.

"Edward!" someone called. "Edward, stop! Stop it now!"

I paid it no attention, too far gone in rage. How could she say that Natty deserved to die?

"Edward," a male's voice now. A voice that usually calmed anyone that heard it but not me. Not now. Strong arms came round me like a vice, restraining me and someone else pulled Tanya away from me, but I couldn't see who it was for the red film of rage that blocked my sight and rang in my ears. I could hear voices telling me to calm down, but I couldn't. I was lost in my own anger. Out of control. And, in my head, I could hear Bella telling me to stop and this voice did for me what the others hadn't.

I stopped fighting and the profanities that had been pouring out of my mouth turned into a gurgled sob as I let the anger seep away and the grief consume me. For the first time in days, I turned into the wreck that Bella was, that I was. The wreck that I wouldn't let anyone see. The real me that had been fighting a battle with myself for days was finally let out and I cried into the cage of arms that had turned from restraints into comfort.

For the first time in days, the shell had been broken.

Alice POV

Jasper and I wandered through the corridors of the hospital, following the directions we had been given to Natty's room. I felt apprehensive, worried at what we might find there. Would Edward and Bella be asleep? Would Natty be okay? Would she be any better, or worse, than she had been when I last spoke to Edward?

Jasper told me that I should go in alone to start with in case they didn't want visitors. I agreed and gave him a quick kiss before going in quietly.

At first, the only things I could register were the little girl on the bed, the life support machine and the quiet beep of the heart monitor. But then I noticed Bella crying by the side of the bed. Her head was in her hands and she was crying her eyes out.

"Bella?" I asked softly, going over and sitting beside her.

Bella jumped and looked at me. She looked like hell. There were huge bags under her red eyes and her face was terribly drawn, the stress clear as though someone had written it across her forehead.

"Oh Alice," she whispered. "I've done something stupid."

"What?" I asked, sliding an arm around her and hugging her tight.

She sniffed, another sob escaping before she spoke again, "I… I said that… that he didn't care. I said that he didn't care if Natty died. And… and… and I told him… to go away!" she wailed, beyond hysterical.

"He'll forgive you," I said, without a doubt in my mind that he would. "He loves you."

"But… I… I was so… horrible. He did go away. And I don't know where he's gone. I looked outside, but he's gone!" She whimpered. "I hate this Ali. I just want to die."

"Don't say that!" I chided. "What about Edward? What about Natty?"

"But I've lost them both," Bella whispered. "Natty thinks that we don't… don't love her and Edward probably hates me now. Why can't I die instead, Ali? Why?"

"Oh, Bella," I sighed, letting her cry into my shoulder and making a mental note to make sure that she was never left alone.

Then, the door opened and a doctor came in. He ignored us, checking the notes at the end of Natty's bed and writing some things on a clipboard.

"I just want Edward to come back," Bella mumbled. "I have to tell him that I'm sorry and that I love him."

"Don't worry," I murmured soothingly. "Jazz and I will go and find him. When did he go?"

"About fifteen minutes ago," Bella sniffed.

"You're looking for Edward?" the doctor spoke up.

"Yes," I replied.

"I saw him about a quarter of an hour ago leaving the building. He was talking on his phone to someone called Tanya… asked her to meet him for coffee."

I felt my blood turn to ice. "Oh crap."

Bella looked scared too. "Oh no," she whispered.

"Stay here," I said quietly to Bella. "I know where he will have gone. We'll go and find him and you stay here." I turned to the doctor. "Stay with her. Please."

He nodded and I shot out of the door, grabbing Jasper's arm and pulling him along to the exit with me, without even giving him a chance to speak.

I told him what had happened in the car on the way to 'The Coffee Bean'. He understood and we carried out our devious plan on the way to the cafe. Now we just had to stop Edward from doing anything rash.

But when we got there, Edward was nowhere to be seen. I felt disappointed with myself; how could we have not found him? But then I had a flash of inspiration: the duck pond was just round the corner.

I dragged Jasper off in the direction of the pond, and saw Edward from across the pond to him. I breathed a sigh of relief and started towards him. But then Tanya said something to him and I could see his resolve in his face, but I didn't believe it. Edward wasn't a violent person. He wouldn't… oh but he did. He drew back his fist and threw it with all of the force that he could into Tanya's face, making her nose bleed.

I wanted more than anything to let him continue to let her have it, but I couldn't. "Edward! Stop it! Stop it now!" I shouted, running towards him. Jasper got there before me and pulled Edward off of Tanya. I grabbed the she-devil so that she couldn't get away and then watched in horror as my brother broke down in my husband's arms.

I had always looked up to Edward. He had always been able to control his emotions. He was inspirational. But now, he just cried. His curses quickly turned to uncontrollable sobs and my heart ached for him. Had any of us ever realised how much pain he was really in? How much he was hurting?

The rain got harder, throwing it down on us as Edward slumped against Jasper, defeated and utterly broken for the first time in his life.

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:'( Poor Eddiekins. Ha but I did tell you that Tanya would get her revenge. You might be surprised to hear that she hasn't actually had the worst of it yet… See the bottom of the AN for a COMPETITION.

I hope you liked the APOV. I didn't actually intend to do that it just… wrote itself XD

I'm in a surprisingly good mood. Probably because I've been writing this all day and now it's finished and this is the first time that I've finished a chapter without feeling rushed :D

Actually, you really do have yourselves to thank for this speedy update. I don't think that you realise how inspirational some of your reviews actually are. Seriously, I got out of bed this morning, came to my laptop and just went 'meh.' Because I was too tired to think. So I checked my reviews instead and they really made me happy and WANT to write because they were so encouraging. So thanks guys. So much.

I'm also really ecstatically pleased with the review count. 2,300+ reviews is something I never dreamed I'd ever get so I am so, so happy :D You guys are so brilliant to stick with me even when I don't update for a while and when my writing isn't incredible. Honestly, thank you so very much. It is you guys that make me want to keep writing day in day out.

And I have a few things to put in this AN that I forgot in the last one.

Firstly is that I did my research on hypothermia and the symptoms and stuff are all real symptoms of hypothermia and that really can, and does, happen. But the research stops there. Luckily, I have never really been in a hospital so I don't know what happens with the room things and the other thing that I don't know if it is accurate is the whole fit thing in the previous chapter. I don't know if you can have a fit while you're unconscious or as a result of hypothermia, but I used creative license. It's fiction so it doesn't really matter at the moment. But if you do know something that you think would help, then please say because anything that makes the story more accurate is an improvement. But I did do as much research as I could.

Second is that I know how dramatic and maybe OTT this could be seeming at the moment, especially with Bella going a bit strange and taking everything out on Edward that he really doesn't deserve. But this is intentional and it's supposed to illustrate Bella's strong relationship with Natty and how Bella and Edward's relationship is taking a good knock because of this.

And thirdly, I'd like to thank everyone that was really supportive over both the 'book' thing and the award site. Big, big thank you to everyone that said that I could definitely have a book published- that really means a lot to me. Thank you so much guys :D

AND NOW FOR THE COMPETITION! :D This chapter I am going to hold a competition for a line in the next chapter :D Basically, in your review write a line that you want Edward to say to Tanya and the best one will be included. It has to be semi-humorous and it can't be an action it must be something that he can say to her. Please be serious though :D

And I just have to say... MEGA LOL AT MY FRIEND HANNAH who reviewed the last chapter saying: "I know how Natty got hypothermia! It's all that bl**dy ice cream she ate! It's so obvious!" XD Lol. I am laughing my head off.

So… I think that's it. Please tell me your thoughts on this chapter and the Alice POV.

Thank you :D

Steph