Rating: M
Characters: Leroy Jethro Gibbs, Tony DiNozzo, Tim McGee, Abby Sciuto, Ducky Mallard, Jimmy Palmer, Ziva David, Leon Vance, OMC, OFC
Pairings: Gibbs/Tony
Warnings: Rape/non-con, torture, violence, trauma, angst, slash, swearing, mild Ziva bashing (She behaved horribly towards Tony at the end of season 6. I never liked her after that.)
Spoilers: Parts of the end of season 6 and the beginning of season 7
Disclaimer: I don't own these characters, I just like to play with them.
(Author's notes: Bonnie, as you may recall, is a home health aide that was introduced in chapter 21.
It may be a few weeks before I'm able to update this story. I'll be going on a long overdue vacation next week! But there are some big developments coming up! So rest assured, I will be updating as soon as I possibly can!)
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Setting the baby monitor on the workbench, Gibbs sat down, reaching for a block of wood. Wood work was something he would always enjoy, and while caring for Tony left little time for such hobbies, he knew how important it was for him to keep interests of his own. Things that defined Gibbs outside of his role as a caregiver. Never mind that Gibbs was spending this time making something for Tony. He was doing it in his own time, by choice, with love.
Picking up a whittling knife, Gibbs was about to get to work when he heard rustling and bumping sounds over the monitor.
Letting the items fall from his hands, he sat, frozen in terror, as the sound of Tony's rhythmic breathing changed first to a startled gasp, then fearful whimpers.
"Quiet, Junior," DiNozzo Senior's voice hissed over the monitor.
Gibbs shot up off of his stool, dashing towards the stairs as Tony's sobs echoed at him from both the baby monitor and his bedroom on the main level; a dizzying assault of worry and guilt gripping his senses.
But the air felt thicker as Gibbs stepped through the doorway at the top of the stairs, as if he were walking through mud.
Tony's terrified cries screamed at the urgency of the situation, and Gibbs knew there was no time to waste. He had to get to his boy! But the more panicked he became, the slower his progress.
Struggling another step forward, the thickness in the air dissipated; Gibbs' body stumbling forward to the floor in response to the change.
Shaking off the shock of the fall, Gibbs stood just in time to hear a car engine start up outside.
Making a mad dash for the door, Gibbs looked on helplessly as a dark luxury sedan pulled out of the driveway. Staring out the back window at him, a teary eyed Tony pressed a hand to the glass. And though Gibbs couldn't hear him, he could clearly see the boy mouth "da…da…"
Gibbs gasped, clentching at his chest as he awoke suddenly from the nightmare.
Sitting up slowly, he rubbed his head, contemplating his worst fear. He had not yet contacted Tony's father, and had no plans to do so.
As for Senior, he had remained suspiciously quiet since his sudden appearance just after Tony was brought home from the hospital almost a year ago. While Gibbs had no desire for any contact with the man, his absence made Gibbs uneasy. He couldn't see Senior simply giving up on the chance to claim guardianship of Tony – and his sizable trust fund. While Senior had no legal grounds to do so – especially considering the 20 year estrangement between father and son - and any court would certainly laugh in his his face, Gibbs knew that wouldn't stop him from trying.
It terrified him to think what would happen if the elder DiNozzo came in contact with his son for even a second. Tony had made so much progress since Senior's traumatizing surprise visit to the hospital those many months before. Gibbs feared another encounter might put Tony right back where he started.
Gibbs stood up and shuffled to the door, checking to make sure it was locked and the security system on. He hadn't taken such precautions in years. But now, once again, he had someone in his life that he loved, and would do anything to protect.
Turning down the front hall to check on Tony, the sound of raspy coughs filled Gibbs with fresh worry. There was a hint of whimpering behind each cough, and weak sobs between served as punctuation. It was clear the boy was in pain.
"Tony," Gibbs called softly, pushing the bedroom door all the way open.
Tony's whimpers turned to needy whines, and his coughing more forceful as a result. And as Gibbs approached the crib and looked down at Tony, he saw his boy lying lifelessly on his back; looking up at his daddy with big, watery eyes.
"How are you feeling, baby boy?"
Tony coughed again, his breathing thick with the sound of mucous being inhaled and exhaled. Snot, which came out of his nose in a bubble, covered his face.
This was no good, Gibbs decided. Tony would need to sit up if he was going to breathe properly. And since Tony was clearly a baby now, Gibbs would need to help him with that.
Gibbs took a moment to unlatch the side of the crib and let it slide down. Then he crouched down on the floor, reaching his arms out to Tony.
"Come on, baby boy. Up," Gibbs coaxed.
Tony reached up his arms in reply, sitting up with only partial assistance from Gibbs.
Gibbs pulled Tony in close, and the boy butt-slid off of the mattress and into his daddy's lap.
Gibbs couldn't help but to laugh in surprise, and Tony giggled in response between coughs and sniffles, nuzzling into his daddy's chest.
"You're gonna be okay, Tony," Gibbs cooed, kissing the top of Tony's head and not minding one bit that his boy was smearing snot all over his shirt. "Daddy is gonna make you all better."
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Gibbs snuggled with Tony in the love seat, looking on as Ducky checked the boy over. Tony was a good sport throughout, sitting still when Ducky put the thermometer in his ear, and adorably trying to grab the stethoscope from Ducky's hands. Ducky did let Tony see it after he was done using it, allowing him to listen to his own heartbeat. If Tony's wide eyed gasp was anything to go by, at that moment, he thought it was just about the greatest thing ever.
Tony cried a little when Ducky put the bulb in his nose to suction out snot. But hugs, kisses, praise and reassurance that Tony did a good job seemed enough to calm him. And the red rattle Ducky gifted Tony with after the exam even managed to bring a small smile to his face. Tony accepted it happily, shaking the toy in his clumsy hand, made weaker with illness.
"He gonna be okay, Duck?" Gibbs asked, watching Tony hit the rattle against the arm of the love seat.
"Oh, yes. It's just a cold," Ducky replied calmly, holding up a hand to stop Gibbs from asking the next obvious question. "Yes, I have taken Tony's medical history into account, and I saw nothing particularly worrisome in my examination of him. I am confident you should see signs of improvement in a few days. In the meantime, see to it he stays hydrated. And use the bulb when necessary. I know that Tony hates it, but he's incapable of blowing his nose when he's like this."
"He might come out of his regression," Gibbs offered.
"I seriously doubt it." Ducky shook his head, letting Tony's hand latch onto his index finger. "Tony's regressions stem from a need to be taken care of. And doesn't everyone feel that need a little when they are ill? For someone like Tony, who slips into regressions frequently as it is, this need is even greater. I suspect this regression will last until the illness passes."
Gibbs nodded, a smile ghosting his lips as he kissed Tony on the cheek. "I guess I can live with that."
Ducky smiled knowingly. "No need to mask your feelings in sarcasm, Jethro. I know that you're worried about Tony. But I also know that you love taking care of him – possibly as much as he loves being taken care of."
At those words, Gibbs just laughed. "Ya got me."
Tony coughed miserably, turning and burying his face in Gibbs' shoulder.
"Thanks for stopping by, Duck," Gibbs smiled appreciatively, rubbing Tony's back in an effort to comfort him.
"Anything to put your mind at ease," Ducky said warmly. "Enjoy a restful day with your sweet boy. I'll call to check on you both later."
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Tony lie on the cot placed at the wall opposite his crib, which Gibbs had decided to use as a makeshift changing table. Still wrapped in towels from his bath, Tony giggled as Gibbs swiped under his chin and on his neck, drying him off.
As Gibbs looked down, his gaze meeting Tony's adoring green eyes, he silently thanked Tony for once again giving his life purpose. Gibbs had given himself permission to love again, and his heart had never felt so full.
"Hey."
Gibbs turned to see Bonnie set Tony's bottle on the dresser. "You need anything before I go?"
"Nah. We're good, thanks. Go on home and get some rest."
Bonnie nodded, turning to go, when they heard the sound of keys in the door.
"I'll see who that is," Bonnie said with an amused huff. "You get that boy covered."
Gibbs chuckled as Bonnie walked out. Gently turning Tony onto his side, he quickly grabbed the diaper he had set aside and slid it under Tony, then rolled his boy onto his back once again.
He had just fastened the tabs on Tony's diaper when McGee and Abby entered; McGee with a black book bag draped over his right shoulder.
" 'im! Beebee!" Tony greeted happily, looking up at his friends, then promptly coughing from the effort.
"Come on, baby boy. Up you go," Gibbs coaxed, helping Tony to sit up.
"I'm sorry," Abby said uncomfortably, looking at Tony's diapered form. "This is a bad time."
"Not at all," Gibbs smiled, in an effort to put Abby at ease. "We're glad you're here."
Abby simply gave a small nod, shuffling her feet.
"Um…I can help out with Tony," McGee offered, thinking fast. "Why don't you go show Abby your new…coffee maker?"
Gibbs chuckled, thankful for the helpful young man's ability to read people. Gibbs had no new coffee maker, and McGee knew it. He was simply giving Gibbs an excuse to talk to Abby; something the woman clearly needed.
"Daddy will be right back, okay baby boy?" Gibbs informed Tony. "Right now, uncle Tim is gonna take care of you."
Tony hummed, smiling at his daddy.
"That's my good boy." Gibbs smiled back at Tony, giving him a kiss on the forehead. Then, standing up, he grabbed Tony's yellow footie pajamas, which were draped over the crib, and handed them to McGee.
"Just get Tony in his pajamas and started on his bottle. " Gibbs motioned with his head towards the bottle on the dresser.
"You got it," McGee nodded, walking over to Tony as Gibbs left the room with Abby.
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"You wanna tell me what's wrong?" Gibbs asked, as he and Abby took a seat on the couch.
Abby frowned, snapping the bracelet on her wrist thoughtfully for a minute before finally answering.
"You know that I love Tony, right? And I have no problem with him being the way he is."
"I know," Gibbs acknowledged.
"But when I see him like he was just now…it reminds me how helpless he is. And I worry I can't be there for him like I should be. You and McGee are so good at taking care of him and –"
"Abby," Gibbs cut her off, putting a reassuring hand on her shoulder. "There are a lot of ways you can help take care of Tony. It's not all diaper changes and bath time. You could feed him, or play with him. Read him a story. Watch a movie with him. Tony will be happy with any time and attention you can give him. He's your friend, and he loves you. He's happy just to have you here."
Abby smiled tearfully at Gibbs. "Thanks. You always know what to say."
"I do what I can," Gibbs laughed. "Now tell me, what brings the two of you here at this time of night? Figured you'd still be at work."
"We were. But McGee and I were going through this suspect's hard drive, and it was super skeezy! Lots of disturbing stuff on there! So we decided we needed to get away for a little bit. Take some Tony time."
" 'Tony time.' I like that," Gibbs chuckled. "All right." Gibbs stood, patting Abby on the knee as he did so. "Go take some Tony time."
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Gibbs and Abby reentered the nursery to find Tony cradled in McGee's arms, suckling on his bottle.
"Aww," Abby cooed softly. "You're so good with him, McGee."
Tony turned his head slightly at the sound of Abby's voice, unlatching from the bottle as he gave her a playful smile.
McGee sighed. "Come on, Tony. You've only got a little bit left."
Turning his attention back to McGee, Tony obediently latched back on, and it wasn't long before he'd finished the bottle.
"Bup!" Tony exclaimed, sitting up and resting his head on McGee's shoulder. "Bup!"
"He wants you to burp him, Gibbs explained, taking the empty bottle from McGee's hand.
"Oh…okay." McGee nodded slowly in understanding, lightly rubbing Tony's back until a few burps escaped.
"There. Feel better?" McGee asked, giving Tony a couple of gentle pats on the back.
Tony coughed, content to let his head rest on McGee's shoulder.
"Yeah. I heard you weren't feeling so good," McGee said sympathetically. "Maybe it would be best if you get some sleep now, baby boy."
Tony sat up slowly, fixing groggy eyes on McGee. "Pyay," he pouted.
"I don't think you're up for playing right now," McGee laughed. "But maybe I could read you a bedtime story instead. How would you like that?"
"Ory!" Tony grinned, clapping clumsily.
"All right. Hang on a sec," McGee laughed, gently removing Tony from his lap and standing to get the book bag he'd come in with.
"Um…McGee? Would it be okay if I read to Tony?" Abby asked, her voice softer, less confident and more tentative than anyone in the room was used to hearing.
"Sure," McGee answered agreeably, crouching down and reaching into the book bag, which he had left propped up against Tony's crib. "Tony, would you like Abby to read you a story?"
Tony smiled, rocking from side to side on the love seat. "Beebee!"
A teary eyed Abby looked almost relieved as she smiled down at Tony and took a seat next to him.
As Tony snuggled up next to Abby, Gibbs grabbed a pacifier off of the dresser and popped it into Tony's mouth, knowing the boy's tendency to suck his thumb. He then grabbed a blanket from out of the crib and placed it over Tony, tucking it snugly around him.
Tony kicked his feet in excitement as he saw McGee come over and hand Abby the book. Sitting up and peering over Abby's shoulder with interest, he looked down at the book in her hands.
"Impatient fella, ain't ya?" Abby teased, bopping Tony playfully on the nose.
Smiling around the pacifier, Tony settled back down, once again snuggling close to Abby.
"That's a good boy," Abby cooed, kissing the top of Tony's head and opening the book. "This is one of my favorite stories. It's called the Hobbit."