-1Chapter Thirty Eight- Getting Well
It had been a few weeks since Lois moved into the farm. At first she had just wanted to simply come over during the day but after one morning she immediately packed her bags. She'd walked in to find the kitchen trashed. The couch was overturned and the T.V. had been punched through. She found Clark at the bottom of the stairs.
He had gotten better over the time Lois had spent with him. He still wasn't sleeping well and would stay awake and they would simply talk. Lois found out that Clark was a deep person. She learned a lot just by listening to him. His tales of Metropolis and the night life, his loyalties to Edge and Max. He even showed her his scars and told the stories behind them.
Lois found Clark to be an amazing guy who was just unlucky in life. He'd lost his parents, he'd been abused, sucked into the crime life, addicted to drugs, and lost everyone he cared about. Lois had to make him see that it was worth getting better, his life was worth it.
He was starting to get back into his right mind. His body didn't ache like it had thanks to Lois's amazing back rubs. She knew how to work out a bad cramp and it had helped. Once he could just relax and think he viewed all possibilities then realized just how bad he had messed up.
He had done something stupid. The feel of the burn from the drug had been addictive. He didn't blame Max, he had only been trying to help. He had chosen the farm in some attempt to bring his parents back into his life instead of moving on and creating a life of his own.
He knew what he was thinking, he thought that surrounding himself in memories and routines he could bring them back. He had only drawn himself into a depression. Not just with his emotions but with his life in general. He pushed away everything else and now all he had was the farm. The farm and Lois.
She sat beside him on the couch and he could feel the softness of her hip against his side. She applied a small pressure with the cool rag against his forehead. He was having a hot flash, his body sweating out the last of the drugs. He was more than happy to be getting back to normal.
Max had gotten him help around the farm and prioritized the chores. He didn't have to do everything everyday and from Max's knowledge on the farm, helped Clark work out a way to simply live. He felt like such an idiot for not asking Max in the first place. Max's father had run a farm and taught his brother everything. Max's brother then passed it on to him.
He had been so consumed with recapturing his past that he'd lost sight of the present and lost his future. His life was not what he wanted it to be. So he had bargained with the Luthor's and gambled everything and gained his heritage and Lana's freedom. All that had brought him was pain and…Lois.
"Stop thinking. It's only bringing you problems," She said dabbing at his forehead.
"You think?" Clark asked getting a slap on the arm, "I meant do you think about what could have been if you had made different choices?"
She dabbed softer and thought over his question.
"I think about all the stupid things I've done and how it changed me. I do wonder if I had made a different choice what my life would be like. Is that what's bothering you?" She asked
"I regret what I did, so much. Was it worth losing everything?" He asked looking up at her.
She stood from the couch with a sigh and took the bowl of water to the kitchen to freshen up. He sat up and watched her. She returned a few seconds later and sat next to him, setting the bowl on the table.
"I have one question for you," She said turning to look at him. "What have you gained?"
Clark furrowed his brows and looked down. She had a point. He had only focused on what had gone wrong and caused him so much pain. What had he gained?
"I've gained much. A new look on life. The value of what matters most. I can't focus on the past cause that's all it is. I got so caught up in restoring this farm that I lost everything I had worked so hard for," He said looking down at his hands not able to look up at Lois.
"Clark, I understand how this farm could gain a foothold in your life and gain control. You loved waking up in the morning to have your mom's pancakes. Greeting your dad with a hug. You used to help him feed the chickens. I still look around and miss growing up in this house with you and Chloe. I would have done the same thing if I had been in your position," She said rubbing his shoulder.
He closed his eyes at the contact. Something about the way she touched him made his stomach jump. He was confused but he wasn't going to waste his life away. Who knew how many years he'd knocked off his life? Lana had given up on him and turned her back. Pete hated him and Lois assured him that Chloe just wanted him to get better.
"I plan on living with no regrets. I'll do what I want as long as I'm happy and no one gets hurt," Clark said turning back to her.
"Just be careful Clark, I would hate to have to come back here and nurse you back to health. You're quite the slob," She said with a smile. He laughed for the first time in a while.
"Thank you for taking care of me. I know it couldn't have been easy," He smiled with her and leaned closer.
"I've enjoyed this time with you even if it hasn't been the best of conditions," She said.
He sat quiet for a moment, pondering if he should offer or not.
"Lois, I know you're losing your apartment. All your time helping me hasn't let you work" She cut him off, "Don't offer me money. I can handle it."
"I'm not offering you money. I'm offering you a roof over your head," He said.
"What? You're asking me to move in?" She asked shocked.
"I have plenty of room and besides it gets lonely," He whispered.
"You wouldn't want me living here," She said shaking her head.
"I enjoy your company and I would like nothing more," He said leaning closer.
"Clark, I appreciate the offer but I can't impose," She said noticing how close he was leaning.
A part of her wanted him to back out of her personal space, another wanted to pull him closer.
"I won't take no for an answer," He closed the distance and captured her lips with his.
The feeling of close contact like this was warming. He cupped her cheek and pulled her lower lip between his. She kissed him back and when he pulled away he left her breathless.
"I'll stay," She whispered, "if you kiss me again."
He smiled and pulled her back to him. She was a really good kisser and he was surprised that she was kissing him back. He had been afraid she would push him away. When she hadn't pulled back but instead kissed him back he had a new sense of hope. Perhaps he could get his life back together after all these months. He could finally move on and leave behind his pain and everything he rather not dwell on.