Applause rang in my ears, almost deafening when added to the cheers and whistles from the audience. The concert had just ended and Loki and I were taking our final bows. I raised my eyes to the full audience hall and smiled to myself. I'll bet not one of you ever thought there'd come a day when you'd be delivering a standing ovation for the God of Mischief. All those Lords and Ladies cheering us tonight had no doubt been among the first to protest the day Odin had released him from his cell those months ago. How times changed.

Not to mention people.

And while I was mostly thinking of Loki, the same could be said for me. I wasn't the same as I was when I'd first met 'Ilsa'; I definitely wasn't the same woman the Allfather wed to Danethar. Hel, I had a feeling I wasn't even the same as I'd been just a week ago. My gaze darted to the man on my left, whose hand held mine. From this angle, all I could make out was the edge of his smile, half hidden by a strand of hair that had fallen forward.

Might not have changed at all if not for him, I admitted. If I would even be alive. Another month with Danethar and I'm not so sure I would be.

That last thought I pushed aside, not wanting to ruin my mood- or waste my time- on that ass. Far more interesting to think of those last minutes in the conservatory before the concert, when Loki and I had been alone. My cheeks warmed with a blush as I recalled the expression on his face when he'd seen the dress for the first time. All throughout the concert, I hadn't forgotten it; now that it was over, I was on tender hooks over what Loki had said- and what he might have said if Frigga hadn't interrupted him.

If she'd just arrived another minute later…

Perhaps it had been for the best. As excruciating as the wait had been, I suspected the other half of Loki's sentence would have derailed any chance of getting to the concert on time. Or at all, a voice whispered sensually in my ear. The blush deepened, and I hoped anyone who noticed would think I was merely excited by all the adulation. Now if only those butterflies in my stomach would settle down again. Of course they wouldn't- no matter how I tried- when I considered the possibilities of what Loki might say when later finally arrived.

Meanwhile, back in the present, the applause was finally dying down. Guests were leaving their seats to mingle and head for the dining hall, where I sincerely hoped a sumptuous buffet awaited us. And speaking of waiting…Odin and Frigga remained in the auditorium after everyone else had gone. I wished Thor could have been here tonight. At least then I would have had another buffer between me and those two, but wished him well on Midgard all the same. I supposed for Birgitta's sake, I'd have to be civil. Certainly not for theirs.

But you do realize you'll have to make peace with them, right?

I really resented it when I talked to myself. Every time, that nagging voice had something inconvenient or uncomfortable to say- like this time. Because it was right. Even though I felt wronged- and that others like me had likewise been wronged- by the Allfather's refusal to deal with Danethar and his protégés, this bitter feud wasn't doing any of us any good. On the other hand, I sure as Hel didn't want to just let it go. Decisions for another day. Right now, I had two items highest on my agenda; food and finishing the conversation from the conservatory. Everything else could wait.

"Well I dunno about you," I expressed in a muted tone, "But I'm famished. Haven't eaten all day, actually."

"Not even while you were out this afternoon?"

"No time- I was on a mission."

"I'd say I felt bad." Loki paused to glance at my dress. "But…"

I rolled my eyes. "Don't even try. Even you couldn't tell that lie convincingly."

"Ouch," he replied in mock horror. "Such little faith. I could manage it."

"Why don't we agree to disagree and see what we can do to keep me from starving to death?"

"As the Lady wishes," Loki acquiesced with a mischievous twinkle in his eyes, deliberately baiting me.

I was sure he was quite amused with himself to rile my temper that way. Since the sparring lesson with Sif, he'd used that tactic it at least a half-dozen times. Usually when I'd gotten the upper hand in an argument. And every time I caught myself unable to resist falling for it. Not this one, though. Instead of shooting him a dark glare, I merely flashed a smug grin.

"Don't you forget it."

"Oh I'm sure you'll remind me often enough," he quipped as he tucked my left hand in the crook of his arm. "Come on, then. Let's see to dinner."

We descended the short set of stairs to exit the stage, and were joined at the bottom by the King and Queen of Asgard. The latter seemed bursting with the need to say something, but held it in admirably. She kept looking from me to Loki and back again, as if she couldn't quite trust what she was seeing. The Allfather was much more reserved, but no less curious from what I could tell. Curious and…I almost thought I saw a spark of pride there when he looked at Loki.

It's about damned time you saw him for more than just his flaws.

Frigga must have decided she had to say something.

"That was wonderful," she praised warmly. "I don't think Asgard has seen a performance like that in years. The both of you play so beautifully- simply amazing."

"Thank you, Mother," Loki replied, his gratitude sincere. "It was our pleasure, wasn't it, Lilith?"

Oh damn, now I had to say something. I racked my brain for something suitable before voicing my agreement, "Yes, it was. I hope the concert aides Lady Birgitta to inspire others to take up study in the arts."

"I'm sure it will." She hesitated a second or two before adding, "You look lovely, my dear. That gown is stunning."

"Well it better be. I visited half the dressmakers in Asgard this afternoon to find it."

"The designer is quite talented. I'm surprised she had anything left so close to the event."

"Talented, yes; popular, not so much."

Loki chuckled beside me, saying, "Well, that may soon change. I'll wager every Lady here tonight will want to know where you bought that dress."

"If they ask me nicely, maybe I'll consider telling them. And that's only if they let me get something to eat first."

"Right- so, are we all going or what? I imagine they're all waiting on us to begin."

Odin and Frigga preceded us to the dining hall. It felt really strange to enter that room as a group, formally announced to the guests staring up at us with rapt faces. As a child, I'd always been part of the crowd…or worse, not even invited. Now I was here, in company with the pre-eminent gods of Asgard. Strange indeed- but also rather exciting. As the assembly below bowed and curtsied, I couldn't help thinking I could get used to this.

"Something about that smile tells me you aren't thinking of hors d'oeuvres," Loki murmured very close to my ear. "So what put it there?"

"They've never done that before," I answered quietly, nodding at the people below us. "Not for me, anyway. I'm sure you're used to it, but it's an unusual experience to feel like I'm someone important."

"And don't you forget it," he quoted my words from earlier back to me.

We threaded through the crowd milling around the great hall, until at last I found myself presented with the first glimpse of food I'd seen all day. Tray after tray of fruits, cheeses and assorted meats. And the deserts…everything looked so tempting that it was hard to decide where to begin. While I debated over that, Loki must have heard someone call his name, and turned away for a second. Reluctantly, he released my hand and stepped back.

"I'm afraid I'll have to leave you to your own devices for a bit, Lilith. The Allfather wants to speak with me."

"I'll be fine," I told him. "I think I can handle dinner. You might as well find out what he wants."

"I'll return soon as I can."

With that, he strode across the room to where Odin and Frigga were waiting for him. I stared after him for the longest time, too distracted by thoughts of how handsome he looked in that suit to concentrate on anything else. Quite possibly the most beautiful man I'd ever seen. And I wasn't the only one to notice; I saw the lingering glances Loki received as he passed other Ladies. A flash of uncontrollable jealousy ripped through me that they dared look at him that way.

They can look at him however they like, taunted my innermost thoughts. It's not as if Loki belongs to anyone. I don't recall him belonging to you. As I kept my eyes fixed on him, my answer sounded far more determined than I expected. Not yet, but that may be changing very soon.

"Just friends, huh," I heard Sif muse wryly. "Pretty sure friends don't look at each other that way."

I swore under my breath and forced myself to turn to the woman now standing beside me. When I did, her expression was smug, no doubt gloating over her victory. I cast a nervous look around to be sure no one else was in earshot. That only encouraged her even more.

"It's true, then. You're attracted him, aren't you?"

"Shhh…not so damned loud," I whispered to her. "I don't want anyone to hear you."

"Anyone like Loki, for instance?"

"Sif." My eyes darted back to Odin and Frigga, making sure he was still there. "This is so not the time to discuss…"

"If you were hoping to keep it a secret, shouldn't have worn that," she replied with a grin. "In that dress…well, Loki would be a fool not to see a message that obvious."

"You think so," I asked anxiously. "Could just be that I wanted to make a good impression for the concert, not for him specifically…"

"Uh uh. Maybe some other gown, but not that one. Face it, Lilith, you're busted." I could only sigh by way of response, to which she added cheerfully, "For what it's worth, I'm glad."

"What?"

"What what?"

"I um…wouldn't think anyone would approve…"

Sif just grinned at me, reaching over to grab a honeyed cake from one of the trays. I expected that she'd enlighten me with more of her thoughts on the subject, but she didn't walking away without another word. I'll bet she has plenty to say when I go back for my next sparring lesson, though. No sense dwelling on that, though, so I picked up a plate and meandered up and down the long banquet table. The whole time, I was aware of the din of the conversations around me- most of them featuring Loki…or me; I pretended not to notice.

Eventually, I found Lady Birgitta. She and Timar were talking with her two friends, Lady Kendry and Lady Jorra. When I sided up to their group, they were quick to drop their initial topic in favor of discussing the success of the concert. My curiosity was peaked to find out what they'd been talking of that they didn't want me to hear. If I had to guess, likely along the same lines as what I'd just heard from Sif. I'd really fed the rumor mill today. In any case, none of them wanted to bring it up with me around. So we discussed the possibility of another concert in the future. Even whether I'd be willing to give lessons.

I was about to reply to Lady Kendry's suggestion when a prickle raced over my skin. Someone was standing close- far too close. And since I could still see Loki talking with the Allfather, I knew it couldn't be him. Prompted by the uncomfortable looks darting across everyone's faces, I grudgingly turned my head to see who had dared invade my personal space. Whoever he was, I didn't recognize him at all- a stocky sort of man dressed in slightly rumpled finery and a square-cut jawline. Instantly, I found myself disliking him. He was closer than I had even suspected, barely more than a few inches away. I side-stepped to create some space between us, eyes narrowed in annoyance.

"Can I help you," I demanded coldly.

"You're a pretty one, aren't you," he said, closing the distance with a step of his own. "I've been watching you."

"Lord Othar," Timar warned. "Leave the Lady be. She's not interested."

"Way I see it, she is- looking like that. I'm just answering her advertisement." He turned back to me, eyes bright with a mix of drink and lust. I recoiled when he snaked a hand out to paw at my upper arm. "What do you say, sugar? Why don't you and me ditch this shindig so you and me can have a private party of our own. I know what a girl like you wants."

"Let me go!" My voice rose with anger and fear.

"A tease, huh?" His grip only tightened and he leaned closer. I disliked the gleam in his eye when he said, "You could do with a lesson, then."

Memories of Danethar swam before my eyes, blinding me to the room and the people in it. Adrenaline rushed through me and sent my pulse racing. It fed the fear crawling up the back of my throat. Fear and…hatred. I hated this Lord Othar with everything in me, and wanted to make him pay. The feeling was so strong that it tapped into something I didn't know I could access when I was awake: the realm of my nightmares.

Almost before I knew what I was doing, the portal opened. On the other side of that swirling gate between the realms teemed the monsters and demons that haunted my dreams at night. But they paid no attention to me, eyes boring soullessly into the man with his hand on my arm. The fear burned away as I realized they were waiting for my command. This time, I was in control. And I knew exactly what I wanted to do with that power. I allowed the gateway to widen- large enough that a claw-like hand poked through to snatch Othar's doublet violently. A frightened cry erupted in the room. His.

"Teach me a lesson," I repeated with a sharp-edged smile. "No, Lord Othar, I think not. On the other hand…I have just the place for someone like you."

More hands thrust through the gate, pulling and tearing at the man writhing with his efforts to get away. He wouldn't. Couldn't. I merely watched the futile struggle, the smile on my lips never faltering.

Loki was growing impatient, more than ready to be done with this conversation. How much longer was Odin going to keep him here when all he wanted was to rejoin Lilith? Frigga sensed his wishes a while ago, and had tried to find a way to end the discussion. All attempts had failed, so Loki tried not to sigh when the Allfather ignored yet another of her hints.

A commotion on the far side of the room interrupted whatever he'd been about to say. The three of them turned immediately to its source. Lilith. He spotted her among a group of Ladies and Lords- most of whom seemed frantic to get away from whatever was happening. Loki caught a glimpse of Lord Timar trying to say something to Lilith, whose attention was directed at some other man. A Lord he didn't recognize. That one was causing most of the racket, screaming as he was drawn into…

Gods, that's not a portal to Micharea, he realized in horror. That's the other realm- the one of her nightmares. Loki didn't wait to be dismissed by the Allfather, pushing through the throng of panicked guests to get to her. He had no idea what had happened to make her call up that portal, but it had to have been bad. Never should have left her alone. Timar was still trying to get Lilith's attention when he got to them.

"Lilith, let him go. Please don't do this." He saw Loki and gestured helplessly at her. "Can you fix this?"

"What happened?"

"Othar had a bit too much to drink and it made him do something stupid. The next thing I know…that appeared. Don't even know what it is, but now I can't even reason with her."

"What did he do," Loki demanded in a deceptively calm voice.

Timar sensed the danger lurking behind it, swallowing nervously as he replied, "Got too close. Even put his hands on her. But I think it was what he said that really set her off."

For a long moment, Loki only stared furiously at the screaming wretch. He was tempted to leave him to Lilith and that blasted realm. Sounded like Othar deserved it. His concern about what opening this portal might unleash for her was the only reason he considered intervening. So with that in mind, Loki nodded and approached her from behind. Carefully, lest she think it was someone else out to do her harm- he laid his hands on her shoulders. Even with that precaution, she still flinched.

"Lilith, it's only me." She didn't respond, eyes fixed on Othar. "Lilith, what are you doing?"

"He belongs with the rest of the monsters." Searing hatred threaded through those coolly spoken words. "Asgard has no need for his kind."

"Maybe so, but not this way, Lilith. You can't condemn a man without a trial." No answer. Meanwhile, they were running out of time for Othar. Loki almost feared it was too late for him. He tried again. "Let him go. If not for his sake- then for mine. I don't want to see you do this."

She blinked once or twice, then twitched her shoulders from beneath his hands as she glided towards the portal. No words were spoken, but some silent command from her must have released the Lord from the creatures on the other side. Then as quickly as it appeared, the gateway vanished. Othar lie panting for breath on the floor. He cringed when Lilith tilted her gaze down to him.

"Consider yourself very lucky, Lord Othar. Next time, you may not be so fortunate."

Lilith didn't wait for an answer, nor did she return to where Loki stood. She turned on her heel and stalked away from the gathered assembly, causing guests to jostle one another to get out of her way. Loki let her go, knowing he had to deal with things here before he could go after her. He turned to Timar.

"What did he say to her?"

"I…it was just stupid ramblings of a drunk man."

"What did he say," Loki repeated, spacing out each word deliberately.

"He called Lilith a tease and he'd teach her a lesson," Birgitta spoke up when Timar hesitated. Her tone was hard-edged. "You should have let her send him wherever that gateway led."

"My Love…" her husband protested.

"I don't care how much he had to drink, Timar. It only meant the difference between whether the words were said aloud or not- but he was thinking them either way. He's another Eckert. Another Willem. If Othar hasn't done something like this before, it's only a matter of time."

Birgitta was right. Loki had hoped they'd purged Asgard of this lot when Danethar's entourage was executed, but it seemed a few had escaped. Directing a malevolent look at Othar, he knew of one who wouldn't be around much longer. He considered ignoring his own advice to make an end of him right now, but was reminded of the promise he'd made to Lilith. Murdering a man in cold blood- even if it was deserved- was likely enough to get him into serious trouble with the Allfather. And speaking of Odin…he and Frigga had joined the group huddled around the man still cowering on the floor.

"My son, what happened here?"

Loki hauled Othar up by his collar and gave him a rough shake.

"This one must have taken lessons from Danethar and his two trained dogs. Lady Birgitta said he was trying to force his attentions on Lilith."

"I didn' force no one to do anything," the man insisted, words slurred for the drink he'd consumed. "She invited me- jus' a tease by sayin' no."

If Odin had been inclined to think Loki was exaggerating because it was Lilith, the drunk man's words quickly dispelled that worry. Birgitta's stony glare confirmed the truth of it all the more. The Allfather's expression was as grave as it was furious, and he called for the guards. Two arrived almost immediately, likely on their way already on account of the commotion. Odin pointed at Othar.

"Lock that one in a cell. He'll await a formal hearing to determine if there's cause to have him executed."

The warriors nodded and took the man into their custody. Loki watched them exit the dining hall with a closed expression, only turning back to the Allfather once they disappeared from sight. He knew the explanations were far from over, and soon proven right.

"That takes care of Lord Othar for the moment," the Allfather announced. "Now, what was that with the gate? I assume it was one of Lilith's?"

"It was."

"One you've seen before?"

"Not quite like that," Loki admitted. "I don't think she's ever called it on purpose before."

"Explain," Odin commanded with a frown.

"It's the realm Lilith encounters when she's having nightmares of Danethar. When Othar accosted her, it must have resonated enough that she opened the portal. I don't know all the details about that yet. Not until I talk to her, anyway."

"Why did she open it?"

"As I said- I haven't had the chance to ask. I was mostly concerned with getting her to close the gateway, and then she left." Frigga and Odin exchanged a concerned look. Loki kept talking. "So if you want answers on that score, perhaps you let me go find Lilith to ask her."

"Yes, that seems to be the prudent course of action at the moment. We will deal with the guests and seeing to everything here. You should speak with Lilith. When we're ready, we'll send a page with a summons to the audience hall."

He wanted to protest the need for something so formal, but thought better of it. Instead, he gave a slight bow and walked away. Lilith would likely have gone to her suite. Or so he hoped. Loki would try there first, and move on to their other usual haunts in the palace if she wasn't there.

My anger carried me as far as my suite. How dare that leering brute assume I- or any woman at all- actually invited his attentions? Should have left him to become a permanent resident alongside fiends more suited to his company. Someone somewhere in Asgard would have slept easier for knowing Othar was gone. He certainly would have been if not for Loki's insistence that I let the man go, and even that had almost failed to deter me. But as much as I'd wanted to ignore him, I couldn't. Not when his request had come as a personal appeal.

Too keyed up to stand still, I kept walking circuits around my suite. Not the easiest thing to do in the waning light from the open windows. Sometime between the end of the concert and Othar's near death experience, dusk had fallen over Asgard. Fortunately, the servants had already lit the lamps so I wasn't constantly bumping into all the new furniture I'd acquired over the past week. Last time I tried to maneuver in the dark, I smacked my knee on an end table. Definitely had no wish to repeat that.

My thoughts turned from the suite decor to what had just happened downstairs. More specifically, what'd I had done. Called up a portal to the realm of my nightmares- or Urackbeld, as I'd come to call it. Opened it and had controlled it. If I could force that door open of my own will- and command its inhabitants- I had to be capable of keeping it shut. It pained me to think that the apparition of Danethar had been right, and that the terrifying dreams that plagued me in that place were my own doing. Maybe not on purpose- but somewhere in my subconscious, I was perversely determined to hold onto that suffering.

So how do I find that dark corner of my mind and silence it? I didn't know, but I was determined to find out the answer. One of these days I'd finally break free of the chains that kept me tied to my past with Danethar. All the more important now that I was contemplating taking things with Loki beyond the platonic. I had no choice; I couldn't be divided against myself and expect a healthy relationship to grow.

That's assuming he's interested in one in the first place.

Perhaps you're right and he doesn't, but that doesn't change what I have to do. I have to do this for myself.

What would I do with Urackbeld, though, when I no longer needed to torture myself? I couldn't just ignore its existence; I'd created the realm and that couldn't be undone. Also unlikely was any hope of changing its underlying nature. Urackbeld was an ugly realm, full of terror and mayhem that no amount of effort on my part would ever eradicate. What use did anyone have for such a place? I could think of one, but as much as I wanted to chuck individuals like Othar into it, I knew Loki was right. I couldn't deal with them that way. Especially not with that sort of gut reaction that I had tonight.

That worried me more than Urackbeld itself, actually. In that instant when my temper exploded, it had been so easy- almost instinctual- to reach for that realm. I'd reveled in the malevolence stored away in that place, and what I knew it would do to Othar once he entered it. Granted, I'd never had that feeling before, and might not again…but how could I be sure? I couldn't. Next time, it may not be with someone who deserved it.

Did Othar, I wondered, now questioning myself. Did I overreact? Did I do something wrong and lead men like him to think I wanted their attention? Maybe I did. I'd wanted Loki to notice me, but now could I blame others for doing the same thing? I gnawed at my bottom lip, not sure how to answer that question. Not wanting to answer it at all.

My mood swung on a pendulum, anger transforming quickly into guilt and doubt. With a sigh, I turned my footsteps towards the balcony in my bedroom. Night had now fallen over the city below, slowing the hustle and bustle of its many streets as everyone rested for the morning. Except for the guests leaving the palace, of course, who were splintering off in their various routes home. That was my fault. The festivities would have gone on into the wee hours if I had kept a leash on my temper. A moot point now.

With a sigh, I rested my forearms on the balustrade. The air held a sharpness to it that had been absent just a few weeks ago. Autumn was almost here, heralding the end of the most unusual summer I'd ever lived through. Dressed like this, I couldn't stay out here too long. But for a while, I could at least try to find some solace looking up at the stars.

For an evening that started out so well, it had sure ended on a distressing note. Frigga had held such high hopes when she'd walked into the conservatory to see Lilith and Loki together. She'd almost hated to disrupt their private conversation, sure that they'd been at a crucial point when she'd entered the room. But the guests had all arrived and couldn't be stalled much longer. A fact she was grateful her son recognized, even though she was sure he was furious about the interruption.

The concert itself had been a tremendous success. Having kept her distance from Lilith, she had only vague impressions about how their practicing had been going. Time well-spent, Frigga decided. Loki and she played as if they'd been partners for years- decades…forever. The music hadn't been two melodies complementing one another, but rather a singular expression brought to completion only when played together. The audience hadn't been prepared for its powerful effect- especially that final duet on the piano. Frigga caught herself tearing at the end, and even Odin had been moved.

I always knew Loki had more in him than the boyish pranks and scheming. Lilith has helped him find it.

And Lilith…she'd shone more brightly tonight than any of them could have imagined. Not just her outward appearance- which had been a dramatic change from the usual- but everything about her demeanor and presence among them. Confident and self-assured, but absent most of the brittle hatred of those early weeks after returning to the palace. Frigga might go so far as to say she'd been happy. No one would deny that Loki had a large hand in that transformation.

He's helping her to rediscover herself. The woman she would have been without the mage's spells; who she was meant to be if not for Danethar. But as they'd seen tonight, scars lingered beneath the surface. When forced open, the consequences were frightening. She didn't fully understand what lurked in that realm Loki spoke of, but she knew it was dangerous. Once all the guests were dismissed, Frigga broached the subject.

"What do we do about this, Odin?"

"Without speaking to Lilith about that gate and the realm on the other side of it, I am not inclined to make a decision. But," he added with a troubled sigh. "I do not pretend to be entirely comfortable with what just happened."

"A realm of nightmares," she whispered. "And not just anyone's- Lilith's. I shudder to think of what horrors exist in that place. Or what might have happened to Lord Othar if he'd crossed to the other side of that portal."

"I am less concerned about Lord Othar, My Queen, given his own confession before us. Loki having prevented that fate only forestalled what I suspect will be an equally untimely end to him. At best, he'll remain a permanent guest in the palace dungeons."

"You think he's as bad as the others?"

"Possibly. A hearing will provide all the details I need on that score. In the meantime, I'm far more concerned about Lilith's control over that gate, and what danger it poses to Asgard if she's not strong enough to keep it closed unless we have need for it."

"A need for it? Why ever would we need a place like that?" Odin didn't reply, and she decided not to repeat the question. Did he think to use that place to rid Asgard of its worst miscreants and criminals? Frigga suspected so. "What will you do if she can't control it?"

"I don't know, but Asgard must be protected. I will not have the people put at risk."

"You wouldn't think to…lock her up?" Gods, Frigga couldn't imagine how furious Loki would be if that were to happen. "Would you?"

"I hope it doesn't come to that, Frigga. Truly I do."

With that, Odin summoned a nearby page and charged him with delivering a message for Loki to return with Lilith. Nothing either of them could do now but wait.

She didn't answer when he knocked on the door. Not necessarily indicative that Lilith wasn't there, but not exactly the greatest omen, either. Loki tried again. No answer. Undaunted, he pushed the door open and entered the suite. The main room was empty; a glance to the right told him she wasn't in the music room, either, leaving only the bedroom. As he passed through on his way to check, he noted the changes Lilith had made lately.

Almost looks as if someone lives here, he said to himself. The first few times he'd seen it, Loki had thought her suite reminded him of a guest apartment- and an unused one at that. Now, artwork hung on the formerly bare walls and the furniture had begun to reflect her tastes and personality instead of a hodge-podge of bland essentials. He took hope that she meant it as a sign she intended to stay. Frigga had warned him early on that Lilith had threatened to leave Asgard. And even though they'd made rapid progress after the conversation about 'Ilsa', he'd still feared that one day he'd wake up to find her gone.

When he entered her bedroom Lilith was out on the balcony. She hadn't changed out of her dress for the concert, Loki noted with pleasure. He still couldn't believe she'd worn something so…alluring, and entertained the slim hope that maybe she'd been purposefully trying to catch his attention. For a few more minutes, he enjoyed the sight of Lilith in that gown before drawing attention to his presence.

"Lilith?" he called, knocking quietly on the wooden lattice shutters.

She half turned to look over her shoulder at him. The smile on her lips was genuine, though somewhat forced; it didn't reach her eyes. But at least that chilling rage from earlier was gone. Loki hadn't looked forward to dealing with that a second time, though he would have.

"Well, that didn't go well at all, did it?"

"I wouldn't say that," he disagreed, joining her on the terrace. "The concert was a success. Even things in the dining hall went just fine."

"Until I lost my temper and nearly destroyed Lord Othar."

"From what Timar told me of what happened, that was Othar's fault."

"Was it?" Lilith turned back to stare at the city below. "I'm not so sure."

"Why, because he was drunk? That's no excuse-"

"Because I was wearing an invitation," she interrupted him. "So what do I expect to happen?"

For a second to two, Loki was dumbfounded at her reasoning. Did Lilith honestly think to blame herself for that idiot's behavior? As the silence stretched between them, he realized she was serious. Anger rose faster than he could keep check on it.

"Don't you dare say that," he swore vehemently. "You have every right to wear whatever you want and expect not to be harassed for it."

"But if I'd picked something less…" she trailed off with a shrug. "Men like him wouldn't get the impression that I'm interested. They'd have no reason to take notice at all."

Oh Hel no, he snarled inwardly. You are not going to let some worthless mongrel like Othar dictate what you can or can't wear.

"It's not your responsibility to suppress the impulses of others by changing the way you dress. If Lord Othar can't control himself, that's his problem."

"But…"

"No, Lilith. I won't let you win this argument, even if this wasn't my turn to be right, anyway. Since it is- and also because you're dead wrong- this is one argument you're going to have to accept losing."

She threw a baleful glare at him from the corner of her eye, still facing the city. "Do I have to like it," she queried.

"No."

"Well, at least that's something."

"Only you would be so annoyed by losing an argument where winning means you were in the wrong."

"Takes one to know. Besides, I don't want to win; I'm just being realistic."

This time, his snarl of frustration was audible as Loki tried to find some way to talk sense into her. His words were terse as he muttered, "I should have let you send that prick into that portal to…"

"Urackbeld," Lilith supplied, stopping his tirade mid-sentence.

"What?"

"The realm created from my nightmares. I named it Urackbeld. That's where I nearly sent Lord Othar."

He hadn't expected Lilith to have named it, but in hindsight, probably should have. And talking about it definitely wasn't what he had planned to be discussing this evening. But the incident with Othar seemed to have broken through Lilith's silence on the subject of the nightmares- and the realm that fed them night after night. In any case, she really wasn't in the right frame of mind to finish the conversation they'd been having before the concert. Neither was he. That discussion would be hard enough under optimal circumstances; this had catastrophe written all over it. We cannot catch a break, can we, Lilith? Loki leaned against the railing.

"I must admit it caught me off-guard to see a portal to that realm. Didn't think you could call it up outside the nightmares."

"Neither did I, but this evening proved otherwise. Much easier then I would have thought." She paused. "Too easy, actually."

"How do you mean?"

"I was so intent on wanting that man dead- worse than dead, actually- that the gate was open before I could realize what I'd done. If you hadn't come to stop me…"

"I wasn't sure I could," he admitted. "Your rage is formidable, Lilith. I knew that when I first saw it as 'Ilsa', but tonight was enlightening as to its full potential. Dangerous, even."

"A fact not lost on the other Ladies and Lords in attendance. I saw how they scrambled to get as far away from me as possible." Her tone was dismayed. "I suspect the impression I made will be a lasting one. Between this and that match with Sif a few weeks ago, I'll have single-handedly chased away anyone who might have been worth getting to know."

Loki understood how she felt, having spent most of his life on that battlefield. Most Asgardians would never let him forget what he was, and over time, the division between him and the rest of them had only grown. He admitted to himself that he'd let the ignorance of so many sour his opinion of the few who might have looked beyond the differences. Only recently had that isolating animosity begun to thaw. He didn't want Lilith to make the same mistake, and slipped a hand under hers to give it an encouraging squeeze.

"Take it from someone who's been down that road once. If they're intimidated enough to let it chase them away, they weren't worth knowing in the first place. But the ones who aren't will still be out there."

Lilith smiled to herself, but he wasn't sure she was convinced. They were both silent for a while, until Loki noticed how chilled her hand felt in his. The bite in the air had deepened, and he expected she was getting cold.

"Should we go inside?" he suggested. "It's a bit cold this evening."

"I'd rather stay out here. The view of Asgard at night is one of my favorites."

"Well, then," Loki shrugged out of his jacket and draped it over her shoulders. "That should help some."

Lilith fingered the lapel and looked over at him. "Thank you."

"So…" he continued after a moment. "Urackbeld."

"Yeah…I guess my theory was right. It's a realm, and one I created. Not sure which came first- the nightmares or the realm, but it's a bit of a moot point. Before you arrived, I was wondering what to do about it."

"Can you do anything?"

"Well, I don't think I can destroy it. But if it is my realm, I can at least control it. Or so I hope. Maybe if I figure out how to do that, I can get a decent night's sleep."

Loki was about to reply when I sounds of footsteps behind them caught his attention. They both turned to see who had come looking for them, even though he already suspected he knew. And he did. As promised, a page had arrived with a summons to the audience hall. He hoped Lilith was up to answering the Allfather's questions; likewise, he hoped Odin was prepared for Lilith's answers. She looked at him quizzically.

"What's this?"

"A summons."

"The Allfather, I'm assuming. About the gateway?"

"Yes, I'm afraid so."

Lilith straightened with an aggravated sigh.

"And just when I thought the worst of the day was over," she grumbled. "I'm sure he's just thrilled about the trouble I caused. Well, I suppose I don't have much of a choice but to go."

"I'll go with you."

"You don't have to."

"I know. I'm still going."

"I don't have a say in that, either, do I," Lilith replied with a bemused look.

"What do you think?"

"Oh all right. But if we're headed inside, might as well let you have your jacket back." She handed it to him reluctantly with a glance over her shoulder to the night sky. "Star gazing will have to wait for later."

"I'm sure this won't take long, Lilith."

"I hope you're right."