Jessa Bolt

At home or on the road, I always rely on music to get me through the tough times.

I just rely on music to get me through the days to be honest. My Thursday morning was no different, as I spent my morning cleaning. By half past noon, I was doing the dishes and dancing like an idiot to No Doubt's Rock Steady album. The best way to listen to music is loud, so the fact that I heard the knocking on my door is surprising. I wiped my hands on a nearby dishrag and turned down the stereo with the remote as I walked to the door. To say I was surprised to see Sabella standing in front of me would be an understatement; she never said anything about stopping by.

As usual, Sabella looked beautiful. Her pink suitcase was on the ground beside her, her dress a shade or two darker than the case. To be honest, I'm not quite sure it was a dress she was wearing. It was ripped up and very short. I say this with love, but she looked like she belonged on a street corner somewhere. God forbid she needs to pick anything up in that outfit. She likes to accessorize in the same color, keeping it a recurring theme. Her ginger hair was parted in the middle and flat-ironed straight, held back with a white headband. Her eye makeup was dramatic and dark and her lips were overly glossy and wet-looking.

"Sabella?" I blinked.

"You don't look happy to see me," she pouted, her shoulders curving in what I perceived to be disappointment. I shook my head to dissuade the negative thoughts. She seemed nervous and a little upset. "I've been trying to call you for hours, but I imagine your ringer has been off," she continued, picking up her suitcase and strolling into my home. She was right about that. My phone is always on silent. She dropped her suitcase in the middle of my living room floor and turned to me, putting her hands on her hips. "Natalie and Ade are gonna be here tomorrow, but I came early because we need to talk." She looked around. "Where's Brock?"

"He went back home to spend the weekend with his parents," I told her. "Something is going on with his dad."

"Oh no. I hope it's nothing serious."

"I don't know. He just left," I told her. "He didn't say anything."

There was a long pause between us. Sabella went into the kitchen and helped herself to a beer from my refrigerator. I always try to keep Coronas here when Sabella comes. It's the only beer she drinks.

"I know you've heard, so let's just talk about it," Sabella said as she emerged from the kitchen, taking a sip from her beer bottle.

"Heard about what? You and Kurt?" I asked. Sabella nodded. I was surprised that she was blushing. Nobody ever makes Sabella blush. I laughed. "Randy Orton showed up when Kari was here to tell me all about it. I think he was hoping that it was going to devastate me into his arms or something."

"Randy Orton told you?" she asked, cocking an eyebrow. I nodded.

"Yeah. Callie gave him the information. I didn't ask how he knew, and I really don't care to hear about the gory details, Bell, so please spare me them."

"You aren't mad?" she asked. I laughed, an involuntary reaction.

"What are you, nuts? Why would I be mad about it, Bell? I have no interest in Kurt like that. Besides, who you sleep with is none of my business, even if you tell me anyway," I teased. The song on the stereo changed. I watched her sink down to the couch. She looked relieved, like the weight of the world had been lifted off her shoulders. I couldn't help but wonder where she got the idea that I would be so angry or why I would care who she slept with. I ventured into the kitchen and got myself a can of Pepsi.

"Kurt was so angry at me when he found out that Callie knew about us," she confessed, looking down at the amber liquid in the bottle. "He thought I told her. But I didn't. I mean, why would I even speak to her? The only reason I ever spoke to her in the first place was because she was your friend."

"Don't let it bother you. He should be flattered that you even gave him a moment of your time, you beautiful She-Devil, you. Even if you give everyone a shot," I added, taking a swig of my drink. Sabella laughed loudly.

"Oh, you're going there, are you?" she asked me, shaking her head. "You do know that only you, Natalie and Ade can get away with talking to me like this, right?"

"Why else do you think we take full advantage?" I teased. There was a pause. I could tell she was still upset by whatever discussion she had been part of with Kurt. "Do you want me to talk to him about it?"

"You don't have to do that. I'm all right," she assured me. "It's just..."

"What?"

"It's weird, Jess. He's been sleeping with me, but he's lecturing me about being a whore."

"Yeah, Kurt is like that."

"How do you put up with him, Jess? He's so infuriating, and kind of creepy."

"He took me under his wing when I got here," I told her. "When the other girls were being standoffish and snobby. Outside of Amy and Torrie, nobody wanted anything to do with me. Even Nidia had her nose in the air, and she had come from Tough Enough. Kurt took me under his wing because he saw something in me. He thought I could be something good, even if the other women thought I was going to be a washout."

"You know Kurt wants to see something in you, too, right?"

"Oh, Jesus Christ, Sabella." I started to laugh. It felt good to laugh.

"Any word on when the suspension is going to end?" she asked. I shook my head.

"No. Randy said that he wrote a letter to the Board of Directors on my behalf. He says he wants my suspension to end." I shook my head. "I don't know what kind of game he's playing."

"Isn't it obvious? He wants to see something in you, too." I clapped a hand over my face.

"Sabella, you are too much." I sighed, sipping from my Pepsi. "When the hell did I become so desirable? God, I go from being the chubby dateless dork in high school who watched all her crushes ask out the skinny friends to the girl who has men throwing themselves at her. It feels so unreal. Callie was always the one everyone wanted. Men wanted her in high school. Women wanted her in high school. I was the fat friend they had to go through to get to her."

"Callie isn't the hot shit she thinks she is," Sabella informed me. "Sure, she's pretty." I looked at her. "Okay, scratch that - Callie is gorgeous. But her attitude makes her a hose-beast." I choked on my soda.

"Hose-beast?"

"I've been talking to Chris Jericho a lot lately, all right? Look, Callie is not a genuine person like you are. She's self-absorbed and vindictive. I haven't spoken to one person backstage who can figure out why you stayed friends with her for as long as you did. Most of the roster and the crew think you have the patience of a saint."

"That's good to know." I looked at Sabella. "Can you breathe now, knowing that I don't care about whatever it is you and Kurt are doing with each other?"

"I can. God, I've been so worried. I don't know why; I should have known you'd be awesome about it. You're always awesome about everything." Her face darkened. "So what do you think Randy is doing? I'm kind of getting the feeling like he's playing both sides."

"Oh, he is absolutely playing both sides. If Evolution catches him doing what he's doing, they're going to toss his ass out. I don't even want to think about the beating they would give him."

"Is it a bad thing if he gets kicked out of Evolution."

"No. But I have no desire to get in the middle of their group. Right now the plan is to get the suspension overturned. I feel like Callie and Stephanie are pulling all the right strings to see that my appeals get pushed down to the bottom of the pile."

"Have you thought about getting Shane involved?"

"Shane doesn't like to get roped into the family affairs if he doesn't have to," I told her. "Especially when it comes to Stephanie. He loves his sister, but he knows that she's ruthless. He would rather stay neutral. I mean, I've thought about it. I just don't think he would go for it."

"I think you should at least talk to him. The least we can do is get him to get in his mother's ear. Maybe Linda will then look at the paperwork instead of Vince." I looked at her, surprised. "Oh, don't look so shocked. I come up with good ideas all the time."

"I know, I know."

"How was the visit with Kari?"

"Good. She just started seeing this new guy, Kevin. It seems to be going well. She's put dreadlocks and beads and all sorts of other weird shit in her hair." Sabella has only met Kari once or twice, but they seem to get along. "I don't think she likes Brock all that much. She thinks he looks like a Neanderthal." Sabella giggled.

"Do you ever get the feeling Brock is hiding something?" she asked. I nodded.

"Always. The guy is quiet to a fault."

"Kurt told me that he brought Brock back specifically to protect you during all of this. He says that Brock wasn't supposed to start dating you."

"How does the old saying go? Shit happens?" I asked. Sabella made a noise. "God, Kurt can be so annoying sometimes. He likes to nitpick at the things I do, things that don't concern him. If I get any clearer about my lack of interest in him, I'd be beating him over the head with a rubber mallet." I looked at Sabella, who was finishing her beer. "Are you attracted to Kurt?"

"What? Hell no," she answered, a little too quickly. She got up and went to get herself another beer from the kitchen. "I mean, he's not the worst thing I've ever fucked, but he's kind of clingy and weird. Jesus, I thought Zach Gowen was bad."

"Zach was on the rebound," I reminded her.

"How does it work that Callie holds so much power over the people around her?" she asked, emerging from the kitchen. She had already taken a big swig, clearing at least half of the bottle. I shrugged.

"I don't know, Bell. But she does."

"I hope her hold breaks at least over the Board soon. Do you think it's possible you'll be off suspension soon?" she asked. I shrugged. I wished I had a crystal ball to answer her question.

"I have no idea, Bell. I just know I'm getting really tired of sitting at home."