For the third night in a row, Ponyboy Curtis had given up on sleep. The first night, his last one in Tulsa, he'd stayed up all night talking with Darry. He wanted to have as much time as possible with his brother before he left the country. The following two nights, he saw Darry's tear-stained face every time he closed his eyes. There was nothing he could do to make it go away, and he found it was easier to just get out of bed and read a book or smoke some cigarettes until everyone else woke up. He always lied about how long he had been awake so that everyone else wouldn't worry.

It had been hard having to bury his parents and Sodapop, and almost as bad watching both Johnny and Dally die, but leaving Tulsa was the hardest thing he'd ever had to do. The night before, he and Darry sat up talking, sharing old memories about their family and friends, and trying to avoid talking about the fact that they didn't know when they'd see each other again. Darry tried to stay strong while he helped pack the car, but by the time they were about to leave, he was in tears. And as they drove off down the street, Ponyboy watched in the rearview mirror as his brother sank down to his knees, still crying, in their front yard. But he wasn't the only one. Leslie and Steve were visibly shaken, although they managed to keep their eyes dry. Pony, on the other hand, had buried his face in Leslie's hair and cried until they got to the Missouri border. He refused to eat that day, and that night, when Leslie and Steve were passed out in their fleabag motel room in northern Illinois, he got up and wandered around the grounds until the sun came up. They were back on the road not long after that, and they got to Leslie's brother's house about an hour before sunset.

The house was small but clean and in good shape. Leslie's brother explained that he used to have a bunch of roommates who were all draft dodgers like himself. But one thing or another happened to them. Some got married, some decided they wanted to live alone, and one guy even decided to take his chances back in America, so he was left with only one roommate, a guy from California named Eric. He and Alfred seemed nice enough, but Pony didn't talk to them much. Alfred was too busy catching up with Leslie and amazed by the fact that she really was pregnant to pay much attention to him, and Eric and Steve hit it off immediately because they were both good with cars. Pony didn't mind, though. He wasn't in any mood to talk. Part of him wanted to leave the house and take a walk, but part of him was too tired to even think about getting up. So while everyone else was engaged in conversation, he lay on the couch and watched TV. He overheard Alfred asking Leslie what was wrong with him, and she replied with some lie about how he got motion sickness easily so car trips made him out of sorts for a while. He was surprised at how easily Alfred believed it.

That night in bed, Ponyboy tried everything he could to get to sleep. Leslie rubbed his back and sang softly to him until she was too tired to stay awake, so then she lay down next to him and held him tight. She was asleep in minutes, but Pony wasn't so lucky. He tried saying the alphabet backwards and forwards, he recited every piece of poetry he knew in his head, and then started trying to count as high as he could. By the time he reached eight thousand, he knew it was a lost cause. He got out of bed as carefully as he could so he wouldn't wake Leslie, grabbed his cigarettes and notebook off the dresser, and crept out the front door into the cool night air.

XXX

The front door creaked open, and Ponyboy looked up from his notebook to see his wife standing in the doorway.

"Hey," Leslie said. She sat down next to him on the porch and wrapped the blanket she had with her around their shoulders.

"What're you doing out here?" she asked.

Ponyboy shrugged. "I couldn't sleep."

"Aren't you cold?"

"No. It's not bad once you get used to it."

He went back to writing in his notebook. Leslie sat quiet and motionless next to him for a few minutes, and he started to think that she would go back to bed soon. But then she reached over and took the pen out of his hand. He looked up at her.

"What the hell?" he asked. His voice came out sounding angrier than he meant it to, but Leslie didn't seem to mind.

"Pony," she said softly. "Baby, when was the last time you slept?"

"Last night," he lied.

"You forget how well I know you," she replied. "I know it's been longer than that."

He sighed. He was too tired to fight with her. "I dunno. I've probably dozed off a couple times since then, but two nights before we left Tulsa."

"You have to be exhausted."

"I am."

"Come to bed," Leslie said.

He shook his head. "What's the use? I can't sleep."

"Have you been having nightmares?" she asked.

"Not exactly. I just feel bad about leaving Darry," Pony replied. "All I can think about is how we're all each other had, and I just left him. I'm an awful brother, Leslie. I should've just stayed with him. Maybe I wouldn't have gotten drafted."

"But maybe you would have," Leslie said. "You talked about it. You both knew this would be hard, but it's the best thing. At least this way he knows you're safe."

Pony rubbed his eyes. "He's all alone, and it's all my fault."

"He's got friends," Leslie said. "You never know. He could save up money and come visit. You know you two wouldn't have lived in the same house forever. Sooner or later one of you would have moved away."

"Wish it could've been later."

"I know."

Ponyboy rested his head on Leslie's shoulder. "I just feel so alone. And I hate it because he's gotta be feeling the same way."

"Honey," Leslie said. "You've got me and Steve and Alfred, and in just a couple of months you'll have a son. Darry's got Two-Bit and his old friends from school and friends from work he can see. It'll take some getting used to, but neither one of you is alone."

Ponyboy sighed a long, shaking sigh, and Leslie kissed the top of his head.

"It's OK, baby," she soothed. "Everything will be OK."

He let his eyes fall closed as he listened to Leslie's soft, soothing voice. He was suddenly aware of how cold he was, and it wasn't long before he started to feel himself drift.

"Les," he said. "I think I wanna sleep now."

Leslie helped him stand up, led him to the bedroom, and eased him onto the bed. He hadn't realized how soft and warm it was before. Leslie crawled in to the bed next to him, and he snuggled up next to her.

"Goodnight," Leslie whispered. "I love you."

Pony tried to reply, but his brain and his mouth wouldn't cooperate with each other. He was just too tired, and the bed was too comfortable and warm. He would tell Leslie that he loved her in the morning. He shifted his position slightly, and for the first time in days, Ponyboy Curtis slept.

I'm baa-aack! Sorry to everyone who was waiting on this story. I just moved from Alabama all the way to Michigan, so I was spending as much time as possible with my friends and family. And now that I'm in Michigan I've just been trying to get settled in, so writing has gone on the back burner. But now I'm actually going to do stuff! Update today, and I'll get back on reviewing tomorrow. Maybe there will even be another update!

Reviews make my day! They would be a great welcome back present! :D