Self-Control

CLICK. CLICK.

It was lunch time. Looking out of the window, Asahina could see Momoshiro practicing tennis with Oishi in the boy's court. She smiled watching Oishi magnificently returning the ball with his Moon Volley technique and stole another point from his Kouhai. The other boy seemed fired up by it. He was so excited that he use Jack Knife to return Oishi's serve. Everyone was in a good mood after their win in the quarterfinals match against Hyotei yesterday.

'You are so quiet, Hina-chan,' said a girl beside her, nudging her shoulder.

'Oh sorry. What were you saying again?' Asahina asked.

'I asked you how is it like to date Tezuka-senpai?'

'You know you should join the conversation too,' said another girl.

'I just don't find the topic interesting,' Asahina said. 'There is nothing I can say when you were talking and comparing the boys in our school whom I don't even know half of them. And I honestly don't care about who is the current hottest guy or whom he is dating.'

'Well, that's because you are the one whom he goes out with.'

Tezuka is the current hottest guy? Asahina snorted. 'I bet that he got that spot because his team was winning all of their games in the Finals.'

'It doesn't matter how he got that spot. The more important thing is that since Tezuka-senpai is the school's highlight right now thus making you the most popular girl in school.'

Asahina forced a smile but didn't say anything. Then she noticed the so called Mr. Popular passing by her class. 'Sorry guys, I have to go to the washroom!' she excused herself, running after Tezuka.

CLICK. CLICK.

'Hi, Mr. Hot Shot,' she whispered, as she sneaked up to him, throwing her arms around his neck.

The captain smiled inwardly when he heard her cheerful voice and turned around, not even a hint of surprise. 'Rie.'

Asahina found his reaction somewhat disappointing. 'You didn't seem to be surprised?'

'Why should I be?' he asked, as if there was nothing peculiar about her to suddenly hug him like she did. For him, this was just another of her normal way of showing her affection that he'd come to expect. It was probably just a plain and simple gesture but it was enough to warm his heart and helped him to get through his day.

'You're no fun, Kunimitsu,' she pouted, hitting him lightly. Although immediately replaced with a grin. 'Anyway, what brings your royal self to this lowly ordinary place? Aren't you afraid of being raided by your second year's rabid fans?' she teased. 'I just found out that you are the hottest guy in the school.'

'I'm just putting up some lists and announcements on the second year's boards,' he answered, ignoring her sarcasm.

'Oh? I don't expect the student council's president would do trivial things like this?'

'Usually I didn't.'

'Can I help?' she offered excitedly.

'Don't be too excited, Rie. People might think that I'm on my way setting up a prank,' Tezuka said. 'I'm done actually. Now I'm heading to the teacher's lounge to discuss about something.'

'You must be busy then. I guess, it is expected from an idol like you! You work hard even at lunch,' Asahina complimented. 'Have you had your lunch already?'

'No, I will after this.'

'It's fifteen minutes before class starts, you better hurry up,' Asahina said. 'Are we still going out this afternoon?'

'Yes, we won't have practice today. I decided to give them a day off.'

'Great! It has been a long time since we go out. I'll wait for you at the usual spot, okay.' she said, giving him a peck before heading back to her class. 'See you!'

……………………….…………………………………………………SILENT WISH SILENT WISH SILENT WISH…………………………………………………………………….

'Sorry, I'm late,' Asahina said, sitting down beside Tezuka, who was reading a novel under a tree in a park. 'The female tennis club's regulars suddenly wanted to see me.'

'It's okay,' Tezuka said. 'How did it go?'

'Oh please, I don't want to talk about it. It's bad enough to spend two hours listening to eight females bitching about how stupid the school's admin is for their plan of disbanding the club just because we weren't able to win anything this year.'

'Is there anything that I could help?'

'Could we just not talk about this right now? I know that I probably would see you tomorrow to discuss about this problem but let's just leave this matter and deal with it at school, okay?'

'Okay, then I'll be at the Student Council office tomorrow lunch,' Tezuka told her, returning back to his book.

CLICK. CLICK.

Asahina lie down and rested her head on his lap, relaxing. 'Romance of the Three Kingdom. Looks like an interesting book,' she remarked, reading the cover of his book.

'It's a Chinese historical novel by Luo Guanzhong,' he said as he kept reading.

'Oh? Is he famous?'

'Yes, he is but I'm sure you don't really care.'

'Yeah, you are right,' she admitted sheepishly. 'But, it must be that interesting since you are too absorbed in it. Much more than the last book, I'd say.'

'He is one of my favorite writers and I had been looking for this novel for a long time actually.'

'I see. He surely would be happy knowing that he has an avid fan like you. Maybe you should meet him.'

'For your information he was long dead already,' he said.

'Ohhh... Never mind what I said then,' she said.

For a while they were in silence. While Tezuka was turning the page of his favorite book, Asahina took the opportunity to study the boy, remembering what her classmates said about him. Kunimitsu is handsome. On the top of that, he's the smartest in the class. He's a Student council's president and a National level captain of his team in tennis. He's simply good at everything he does.

'What?'

'Nothing.' It's like he has everything that every human possibly want. Sometimes I envy him for being so perfect. Compare to him, I think that I just another normal middle school student. Somehow I felt that it's not fair!

'You are starring at me.'

But sometimes, I wonder what's inside that perfect polished surface. What he's thinking, what he feels, and how he feels them. He always look calm and sure of everything he did. Does he have worries and hesitations too? Those are the things I want to know. And I want to know... more and more. At that moment, she realized that she wanted him to look at her. She didn't know why but right now she felt that she never desired anything so distinctly. Look at me. 'Is that wrong?'

'Rie, if there is something you want to say-'

I'll probably never be able to read his thoughts right now. 'It's nothing really.' Will I be able to understand him some day?

'You seem to be deep in thought.'

'Yeah, I am thinking of you actually.'

'If you're thinking of pulling a prank on me, forget it.'

Asahina smiled. 'No, I just miss you.'

CLICK. CLICK.

Tezuka looked at her and realized the amount of effort she put, trying to distract him from his book earlier. 'Rie, I've been thinking, could it be that you want some attention?'

Asahina momentarily froze, realizing how apparent she was for wanting his attention, then looked away and nodded. She could feel heat raising up her neck.

Tezuka closed his book and looked at her. Giving his undivided attention solely to her. 'Tell me how may I amuse you?'

Asahina smiled at him. 'I just feel like it has been a long time since I see you.'

'We do see each other everyday, don't we?'

'Yeah, and whenever I saw you at school, you always look so busy. If you weren't practicing, you carried god knows what files or books and head to either your student council or teacher's office. You are working so hard as if the school would fall apart if you don't.'

'There are so many things that I need to attend to, Rie.'

'I totally understand that,' Asahina said, growing more serious. 'It's just that I feel like I'm showing more of my feelings than you.'

'I see,' he said.

When Tezuka didn't say anything else, she wondering if she stepped over the line and annoyed him. 'I didn't mean to control you or anything. I just...'

'You are right, and I had been busy lately training for the match against Hyotei on the top of everything else.'

'You're so cool and calm. I feel like I'm the only one showing affection. You don't seem to love me that much. In fact, I feel like I don't know you anymore.'

Tezuka was temporarily stunned, not expecting that statement. 'I'm sorry for ignoring you.'

Asahina looked at him, feeling ashamed of what she said. 'No, I'm the one who should be sorry. I didn't know what had gotten into me. It's stupid, I know.'

'Come here,' he said, pulling her down, laying her head back on his lap. 'Firstly, I never thought I'd hear that from someone who always pull a prank over her boyfriend every chance she get for entertainment!'

Ouch! You hit a sore spot.

'Secondly and most importantly, you might not know a lot about me... But I know me.'

'What are you talking about.'

'Do you want me to tell you?'

'Huh?'

'Tell you how much I love you? Are you sure that you want to know that?'

Asahina was hesitant at first but she nodded.

'Ever since I met you, it seems that there're a lot of times that I failed to control my feelings for you. I know that I had been acting out of my usual character ever since we went out together.'

'Oh...'

'There were a lot of things that I said and did to you that I would never had done to anyone. It seemed like everything that I used to kept inside me just went out. I never thought something like this would happen to me. All I know is that I am drawn to you.'

'You are?'

'Yes, ever since the day I met you, I knew that there was something special between us. I can't stop thinking of you.'

'You are scaring me, Kunimitsu. You sounds like a stalker,' she said, although she couldn't help but agreed with him. Because somehow along the way, she had fallen in love with him, head over heels, with all her heart.

He reached out to capture a tendril of hair that lie on her shoulder and wound the strand of dark hair around his finger tips. 'Do you have any idea how cute you really are?'

'That is such a cheesy pickup line, Kunimitsu. If I didn't know you better, I would have thought that you did this to every girl all the time.'

'I never said things like this to anyone else.'

'I know. But if the other girls know how romantic you really are behind that scary serious facade of yours, they probably hunt me down every corner and shred me into pieces so they could take my place.'

'They are not worth my time. You are.'

Asahina sat up, unable to bear to see the wealth of love shone in his eyes as he gazed down at her. 'I'm thirsty,' she sat up, taking out a can of soda out of her bag.

Tezuka was amused seeing the girl fumbling to open the can nervously. 'Let me open that for you.'

Unexpectedly, when he did, a jet of soda sprayed right onto his face, taking him off guard. He wasn't moving at all.

Asahina blinked her eyes, watching the poor drenched boy before her. Asahina quickly forced a fist into her mouth to stem the flow of her laughter. Oh no, I'm going to crack up.

Tezuka glanced at her, who quickly rearranged her expression in her attempt to muffle her laugh before she turned away.

Hold it... she closed her eyes. Hold it, damn it!!!! The girl turned her back and crawled away from him. But this is the first time I've seen Tezuka looked so flustered. I can't do this. I need to let this out or I'll explode!

Tezuka frown, when he heard her chuckle. No doubt she was making fun of him. Pulling her leg, he drew her to him.

CLICK. CLICK.

'No! Let me go,' she told him between her laughter as Tezuka wrapped himself around her. 'I don't want to get wet too.'

'If I'm going down, I'm taking you down with me,' he said playfully. Well, as playful as Tezuka could be.

'No, I won't let you,' she struggled, giggling.

'Yes, you will. Nobody has ever got away out of my wrath,' he said, turning her around, facing him as the girl continued to laugh. Gazing down at her, he thought of how precious she is and her laughter was about the sweetest thing that he'd ever heard. And he especially loved the way her eyes twinkled when she laughed. 'Are you not done laughing at me?' he said, after a while.

'I can't... You looked too funny.'

'Rie… You are laughing too much,' he said in a hoarse sexy whisper while gently cupping her cheek with one of his hand. Tilting his head slightly, he chastely kissed her sweet rosy lips and proceeded on kissing her lightly along the jaw before docking himself on her lips, while caressing her sides. He smiled inwardly when the girl was no longer laughing and melting in his arms. Her breaths become uneven and ragged, apparently liking the attention he was giving her which earned her a deep passionately kiss. He smiled in satisfaction when he felt her hand on his head to encourage him to continue.

She was breathless and dizzy when he jerked his mouth from hers, not expecting him to end the kiss prematurely.

'I am sorry, we shouldn't do this. I lost my control again,' he said.

'Huh? Do what?' she asked, still feeling woozy.

'We are at a park near our school and I am a president of the student council. I am suppose to be a role model to the rest of the students. If the other students or the teachers caught me doing this...'

'I see. If that's the case, I would like to politely ask the president of the student council to leave my Kunimitsu alone this instant!!!'

'Huh?'

'Yes, and that means you too Tezuka buchou-san. Off you go!'

'Rie, what are you talking about.'

'Are they leaving already?'

'...Yes,' he answered hesitantly.

'Good. Now you don't need to be a role model anymore since you are just Tezuka Kunimitsu. My Kunimitsu, understand?!'

It took him a while to understand what she was talking about but finally he said, 'Yes, my lady.'

'I love this adorable side of you, Kunimitsu,' she giggled.

'I don't want to be adorable, I am your boyfriend not a five year old,' he protested.

'Why not, I love it,' she laughed.

Tezuka feigned a sigh, playing along with her. 'The cool image I had build so hard for so long...'

'...is going down the drain,' Asahina added, continue laughing. 'You should be like this more often.'

Tezuka smiled. 'Maybe I will.' But only with you, Rie...

Asahina brushed her lips to his, but immediately pulled back.

'What is it?'

'I didn't know soda could taste this good.'

'Are you making fun of me?'

'No, people said that the more you love being with someone, the better things taste,' she said, pulling him to her again.

CLICK. CLICK.

……………………….…………………………………………………SILENT WISH SILENT WISH SILENT WISH…………………………………………………………………….

'Kunimitsu, what is it? Did I do something wrong?'

'No, I was the one who was about to,' he said as he quickly withdrew himself from her, the moment he realized one of his hands managed to snake under her uniform towards her chest while he was kissing her. He was going too far and he was ashamed of himself.

'Kunimitsu...'

'Let's go home okay. It's getting late,' he said. Not trusting himself, he kept his distance from her.

It was an awkward air filled between them on their way home. It made Asahina really uncomfortable.

'Are you not going to hold my hand?'

'Huh?' her voice snapped him out of his reverie.

'You are ignoring me and I hate when people do that.'

'Sorry, I didn't mean to do that,' he said, although he remained quiet after that.

'Why are you so reluctant to hold my hand?'

'I am not reluctant. I just think that public display of affection is not appropriate.'

Asahina cocked her eyebrow. 'It is not like we are doing anything. Just holding hands and you think that's inappropriate?'

'Yes.'

'So it's perfectly okay to hold and kiss me out in the open?'

'...'

'Not to mentioned that you stole my first kiss in the forest too.'

Tezuka blushed and wondering how easy it was for her to say those things out in the open. 'It was my first time too.'

'I think you are just embarrass of having me as your girlfriend.'

'What?'

'Do you happen to have another girlfriend?

'No.'

'Or a boyfriend then?'

'What? Of course not!!!' Is she implying that I am gay?

'You know, since I got to know you, I always caught you and Syuusuke exchanging meaningful glances to each other.'

'What are you saying? That you are jealous of Fuji?'

'Maybe. I mean, Syuusuke is very pretty. It is hard not to be intimidated by him.'

'You are comparing yourself to a guy, do you realize that?'

'I am aware of that but as I said, he is very pretty,' Asahina said. 'I honestly think that if you do happen to fall for him, I don't think I can compete with him.'

'Listen to yourself. You are not making any sense.'

'You like both male and female. Think of the possibility, maybe you love me but at the same time you a very much interested in Syuusuke, am I right?' she rushed on.

'Wrong.' Not only that, liking another guy is wrong on so many levels.

'Look into my eyes and tell me that you don't find Syuusuke to be attractive.'

'He is just a friend.' Tezuka told her, looking into her eyes.

'You are avoiding answering me. Do you find him attractive?'

'We were talking about why I didn't hold your hand right? Why are we suddenly talking about Fuji?'

'Don't be shy, Kunimitsu. I can see it in your eyes,' Asahina said coyly, squelching her giggle.

Glare. He knew it, Asahina was just teasing him.

'Come on... There is nothing wrong with being a homo. At least you are honest with your feeling.'

'...'

She smirked.

He glared.

'How couldn't you find him attractive?'

'I don't swing that way.'

'Really?' Asahina asked unconvinced.

'Do you really want me to date Fuji?'

'Are you asking me a question or a consent?' she smirked.

Tezuka looked at her disapprovingly as a father would to his daughter and the look was priceless to Asahina. The captain sighed in defeat when his look had no effect on her. The girl is enjoying this too much, he thought. 'Alright! If you really want to know I'll tell you... but only because you insisted to know.'

Asahina froze totally not expecting the sudden... confession? 'Huh?'

'It has been more than two years...' he began, his tone was mysterious.

'Two years?'

'Nobody suppose to know this. Not even you because that was what we had agreed on.'

'We? You and Syuusuke? Are you serious?'

'Ah... This kind of relationship is not something that we would want the public to know.'

'EEEHH! Relationship?!' she gasped. 'Y-you mean?'

Tezuka nodded.

'You are kidding, right?' Tell me that you are, Asahina silently begged. This is not happening... It's not suppose to!

'It is true,' he simply said.

'Kunimitsu, you are scaring me.'

'That's what you want right?' he said without looking at her.

'Absolutely not!'

Eyes crinkling, he gave her a teasing glance 'Then, next time be careful with what you wish for.'

Asahina breathed in relieved, 'You scared the life out of me just now. That is not a nice thing to do, you know.'

Tezuka was amused and said, 'You were the one who started it.'

'But, that's because you were acting strangely just now, you worries me.'

'...'

'See, you did that again.'

Tezuka stopped on his track and turned to her. 'Aren't you scared of me?'

'For what?'

'Well, for one, I almost-' he trailed off, unable to bring himself to say it. 'Back then.. My hand was... losing control... Oh never mind.'

'Kunimitsu, what's wrong?'

'Nothing.'

'Liar.'

'I just need time to consider... things.'

'Things?'

'Yes.'

'What kind of things?'

'That maybe I should see if the school will indeed fall apart if I decided to take a day off,' he said, trying to change the topic.

Blink. Blink. 'What?'

'You said that I had been working too hard as if the school will fall apart if I didn't.'

'Oh, okay.'

Silence.

It seemed obvious to Asahina that he was trying to change the subject but she wasn't about to let him get away with it. 'I am not scared of you, you know. If anything I trust you,' she smiled. 'Even though, now I think about it, I have to agree that you should restrain your hands from going under my shirt.' She saw his chiseled features slightly flushed which made her laugh. 'I'm kidding. I know that you would never go that far.'

'I'm a man, you know.'

'You are Tezuka Kunimitsu.'

'Yes, but I'm still a man.'

'So what are you proposing I should do?' she asked in sarcasm, hands on her hips. 'That I should wear belt?'

'We need to be cautious. We shouldn't let our guard down. In fact, until I got a hang of my control over my feeling for you, it is wise to not be too close.'

Asahina was speechless although she did found Tezuka's naïvety to be cute.

'I think that it is an appropriate thing to do.'

'...'

When Asahina just stood there staring at him like he grew another head, he wondered what she was thinking at that time. 'What?'

'You are trying too hard, Kunimitsu,' she told him. 'Things like this should come naturally.'

'But, what if I lose control again?'

'You do know that I'm capable of kicking your ass, right?'

'Rie, how many times do I have to remind you not to use profanities around me.'

'But you know what I mean, right? I will stop you if I don't like it,' she said. 'The last thing I want is for you to be on guard when we are together. I just want to be with the real you.'

Tezuka sighed, feeling that he was fighting a losing battle. 'Then promise me that you'll snap me out of it if I cross the line again?'

'Leave it to me. I will fend off any of your perverted attempts. Besides, I had a fair warning what kind of person you are from our very first meeting,' she teased.

Tezuka frowned, knowing that she was referring to the fitting room incident. 'I am not a pervert.'

'I know, I just want to tease you.' The girl laughed when Tezuka cocked his eyebrow. 'Just trying to lighten your mood.'

'Then, you are trying too hard,' Tezuka told her.

'Hey, that hurt, you know,' Asahina said, hitting his shoulder. 'That's no way to treat you girlfriend.'

'Same could be said to you,' he said, continuing walking again. This time, holding her hand. The girl smiled knowingly when she noticed he was retuning back to his usual self but didn't say anything.

When they arrived outside Asahina's apartment, the girl turned around facing her boyfriend. 'I guess this is it, huh?' she smiled. 'I really enjoyed myself today, Kunimitsu. Thank you.'

Tezuka looked to her, gazing her lovingly, marveling how beautiful she looked as her frame illuminated by the sunset glow. 'Me too,' he murmured, still tracing her features with his gaze.

The girl waited for a while and when Tezuka didn't say and do anything else, she began to walk away from him towards her apartment. 'Good night, Kunimitsu.'

'Wait,' Tezuka caught her arm and drew her to him.

Asahina was surprised when Tezuka kissed her on her cheek and down her neck before turning around, walking in the direction of his house. 'Good night, Rie.'

Asahina could feel heat rising up her face. She was dumbstruck by Tezuka's unexpected move for a while and touched her cheek. 'So much for inappropriate public display of affection huh?' she whispered. Asahina didn't know why but she found herself loving him more and more.

……………………….…………………………………………………SILENT WISH SILENT WISH SILENT WISH…………………………………………………………………….

CLICK. CLICK.

A man who was hiding not far from them put down his camera and wrote down the address of the apartment where Asahina and Tezuka stood. Then, he pulled out his handphone and punch several numbers. His call was picked up after a couple of rings. 'Target is still not aware of my presence.'

Paused.

'Yes, I will send you her address and the pictures to you.'

Paused.

'Just transfer the rest of the money into my account as we agreed,' he said before hanging up.

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Awesome reviews!!! Runamaria, Maze21, Unknown player, Aika, Fujiwara, Otakugal, Asuka, Milisante, Kazuyuki, Tezukabuchou, Jigokunooujo, Sekainoowari, Dragon Reverb, Lei-person...

Of course as usual, I didn't proof read this chappy... well, maybe just a little... Oh thanks to those who pointed out the soooo many grammer mistakes in the last chappy... you guys are awesome!!!!

Review people!!!

Next chappy: Fuji gave it a thought for a moment before an unmistakably sadistic grin shown on his face. 'Don't worry. I have an idea on how to convince him,' he told her, 'and you would love this, I promise.'